There Are Times When I Question, Am I Still Meant To Do This

I am a writer 1

I was reading the latest blog post on one of the many that I follow and it was about the signs that let you know you were meant to be a writer.  It’s funny because lately I’ve been wondering, since I have been a little stalled or slow moving on my latest novel and it doesn’t seem like I am moving as quickly as I would like to with it, does that mean I am not really a writer any more.

I mean sure there are obviously other forms of writing (article writing, blog writing, etc.) that I do and have become better at throughout the years but since novel writing was I initially wanted to become known for, sometimes I feel like I am not as much of a writer anymore.  Okay true, those thoughts only last a good minute or so and then I realize that it’s crazy because of course I am a writer.

Well when I was reading the list on this blog post this morning with the signs that you are meant to be a writer I realized that over half of that list applied to me, in fact maybe all but one (there are 11) I could point out as identifying with.  However, it made me think of a few more that weren’t on the list (not exactly anyway) that also apply as well.

1)      I no longer watch movies and T.V. for pure entertainment but rather more so with the thought in mind of how I could write the script better or how I can write something equally as good.

2)      I still read books the traditional way and write in longhand a lot of the time.  I know that these old traditions have seemingly been tossed out and replaced with newer (supposedly better) technology but I haven’t given up those old ways of writing and reading.

3)      My text messages turn out to be pages in which I go over before sending to check the grammar and spelling to make sure it is written well before sending it.

4)      I still believe in writing my own words inside of a card for any special occasion and in fact can take up a whole entire side of a card writing it.

5)      My idea of a good night is when I can finally sit down and instead of working on a paper for school or even an article, I can actually work on a novel in progress or ideas for one that has yet to be started.

6)      I still wake up with story plots in my head in which I have to actually use the voice memo feature on my phone (which if you knew me you know how much I hate using this feature to record ideas) to get the idea out before I forget it (because my short term memory isn’t as good as it used to be).

7)      I love stocking up on notebooks and pretty pens and any kind of really beautiful stationary and have a hard time even going in staples for fear of how much I might walk out with.

These are just a few of the additions that I would make to the list I read this morning in which about ten of the eleven things on it apply to me.  It’s not that I need constant reminders of why writing is what I am meant to do but sometimes I start to wonder.  You spend so much time working on a craft, and cultivating your career, and having pride in your work that it becomes doubtful when it seems as if none if it is working and like none of the hard work you do is propelling you forward.

I have to keep remembering, slow and steady sometimes is really the best way to do things.  I have to have patience because writing makes me happy and it is just that important to me.  What signs on this list or the list in the blog post I read can you apply to yourself?  What signs do you think you would add that are not on this list?

 

Jimmetta Carpenter

Writer/Editor

The Diary: Succession of Lies (Now Available)

Writing as “Jaycee Durant”

http://write-2-be.com/

http://unpleasantlyplump.wordpress.com/

http://www.facebook.com/people/Jimmetta-Carpenter/1069480310

 

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4 CommentsLeave a comment

  1. I can identify with many of the things on your list. It’s hard for me to just read or watch a movie for the pure enjoyment of it. I am perpetually critiquing. I also think that most writers have that “am I good enough” moment – often. I push through them, however. Just keep writing…that’s my mantra.

  2. I think because our cultural teaches us to seek instant, and probably perpetual gratification, that these doubts often surface. For instance, find Mr. Right… not “understanding” that relationships take work from both sides to get to the good part in relationships. Jobs, same thing. Most hate ‘em when they realize there’s much “work” to be done. Many, thank goodness, see that bringing children into the world is 18 years (at the very least) of hands on labor, and so shy away from that. (note: our children are actually a forever deal;-) … but the point is, writing is like this too.

    I love writing. It’s my passion. Sounds like it’s yours too. So, the only illusions I stay with and take pleasure in enjoying are in the stories and characters I create.

  3. oops… darn typing too fast! You know I meant culture and not cultural

  4. I sometimes wonder the same thing too, thinking how much more time I’d have for other interests if I just laid down my pen and gave it up. How long could I go before I’d be forced to take it up again, or would I? I think it’s good to question these things, to know if we commit to it, why we are doing so, and what we are giving up in its stead.


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