There are many myths and associations that go along with being a writer. Writers are said to be big dreamers. They are rumored to be alcoholics and deeply depressed. They are said to be flighty and unreliable. But one major thing that is associated with being a writer is that we are huge coffee drinkers. Of course that’s not to say that there aren’t non-writers who love to drink coffee, but rarely will you meet a person who is a writer that does not drink coffee.
Well coffee is one of the things that I get really excited about getting to each morning. I sit with my cup of coffee (usually the first of two) and read some of the blogs that I follow and get inspired to write and work on what I need to work on for the day. I must say that it never dawns on me just how important my coffee actually is to me or my creative process until I don’t’ have it for one reason or another. So all of that to say that I almost had a meltdown this morning because I put my coffee in the filter and the water in the machine and turned it on only to come back into the kitchen and find that there was nothing in the pot. The light was on but no coffee had come out.
I immediately started to freak out and try and figure out how to get a new coffee pot considering the fact that I was low on funds and even lower on gas. I’m still not really sure how I managed to scrounge up the money to get, not only gas to get to the nearest Walmart, but also for a coffee pot that was completely overpriced for its size, but needless to say I have now had my cup of coffee. Ms. L. laughed at me when I told her that I had begun to have a meltdown in the store when at first they didn’t have the coffee pot that I wanted and that I had even shed a few tears.
The thing is that I don’t think that I was actually upset over the coffee (well yes I really did need my coffee) per say, just the culmination of things. It’s like when you have everything else not adding up quite the way you want to and the one thing that you know you can rely on, for even a slight way to reward yourself, suddenly isn’t there and doesn’t work anymore. That’s how I felt.
I am trying to work on the things that I need to work on within my writing so that when the shift that is going to come happens I am prepared and I am ready (at least as ready as I can be anyway). Even when God places things in your path and he is working in your favor, you still have to be prepared for all that he has to offer. Having said that, I am not quite as prepared as I would like to be for the changes that I know are coming my way and the one thing that I treasure every morning is my cup of coffee. It helps me to relax, it allows me to think better, and allows my creativity to flow a little smoother. So when my relaxation was gone, and my creativity wasn’t flowing right it made me a little on edge.
I guess I’m sharing this with all of you because I know that someone else out there has some ritual or some routine that works for them and when it’s broken or disturbed in some way it may make you a little crazy (not literally of course) and out of sorts. I just want you to know that you’re not the only ones who feel this way and as trivial as your rituals or the things that keep you going may seem to other people, if they are meaningful to you then they matter. Everyone has their own way of dealing with things, of coping with setbacks, of balancing their risks verses their rewards. You should be okay with whatever gets you through and helps you to push forward to that next level of preparing yourself for the shift that is to come.
The Diary: Succession of Lies (Now Available)
Writing as “Jaycee Durant”
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