Month: February 2020

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When Life Throws You Too Many Battles at Once

February 18, 2020 jcladyluv

It’s hard not to get discouraged when everything seems to be working against you. Lately every time I think things are about to turn around and they start to get a little better for a moment, then yet another obstacle is thrown at me. I know that you’re supposed to be battle tested on the journey to prove you’re worthy of the reward and take whatever life just happens to throw at you but just how many tests are there. More importantly, when does someone let me know what the requirements are in order to be able to say that I passed the tests?

These past couple of days I have felt so defeated. I feel like no matter what I do or how hard I try nothing seems to matter and the end goal still never gets met. It’s either that I’m not trying hard enough or that I’m trying all of the wrong things which results in me running around in circles. I sometimes feel like my constant pushing against every obstacle is pointless and just results in me having a lot of scars from bruises that I’ve collected in my battles.

I know that there is a saying that the difference between a successful person and one who doesn’t become successful is only in the fact that the person who isn’t successful quit right before the breakthrough came. I am in no way, shape, or form, a quitter. I believe in my dreams and I know that I am going to accomplish them just as long as I don’t quit. It’s just not always easy to see that light waiting for you at the end of the tunnel. You start to wonder at certain moments if it’s even there at all and if you’re working towards nothing but more darkness and unknown outcomes.

I am working hard to stay in an optimistic frame of mind and a part of that process is me getting the way I’m feeling down on paper and out into the world. The other part is to just settle my mind and remain hopeful, pray and have faith. I know that better is coming and I just have to be ready when it does. Thank you for being a sounding board when things get a little tough and I hope that you have a process that works to help you push through the difficult times. Until next time… #BeVulnerable #BePersistent #BeinFaith

Jimmetta Carpenter

Writer/Editor

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Don’t Stay Rooted In Your Brokenness

February 11, 2020 jcladyluv

This past month or so the series at church has been about rebuilding yourself in order to begin moving forward. More specifically in the last two weeks it’s been tailored to the subject of healing the past hurts and repairing the broken places. Oddly enough it made me also think about a line I heard on a television show before where the one character was telling the other that it’s a choice to stay broken and that while you can’t change the things that have happened to you, you can choose to work past it and move forward.

When I began this spiritual journey that I’m on a few years ago as a way to work on myself and fixing the things that are broken in me I didn’t have a clue that there would be a specific message one day that would literally speak to that journey. Listening to the message the past two weeks it made me think about the fact that while I still have a lot about myself that I want to continue working on because I’m still not quite where I want or need to be yet, I have actually come a lot further than I had even realized.

There was a moment a few years ago where I would still talk about the trauma that my mother put me through in my childhood with anger and resentment still residing on the inside of me. Back then I hadn’t yet reached the point of true forgiveness because while the words that came out my mouth were that I forgave her, when I spoke about my childhood I could still feel the heat of the anger rising on the inside of me and tears would flow every time because I was still hurting and I had not healed from that. That is different now. I don’t completely explode in tears and I don’t feel the heat and anger rising when I think about it and I have truly forgiven her.

Until this message that I heard these past two Sunday’s I hadn’t realized that all of that time I was choosing to stay broken. I wasn’t doing it intentionally but subconsciously I lived in that hurt and I allowed myself to wallow in that hurt for so much longer than I should have and not forgiving my mother for all of those years wasn’t hurting her because she didn’t care, it was hurting me, repeatedly. The messages of the past two weeks also made me come to the realization that somewhere along the way, while working on my spiritual relationship with God and working on loving myself on a deeper level, I had actually began to heal. I just had to make the choice to get out of the broken place.

We tend to dwell on the things and people that hurt us far longer than we really need to. Now I’m not saying that the pain wasn’t real and that you shouldn’t allow yourself to feel it for a little while but you have to be able to move on from that place of hurt. There is a lesson to be learned through the pain and hurt but you may miss the lesson because you’re too focused on wallowing in it. My pastor said something else that was a powerful statement to me. He said there’s no use dwelling on what hurt you in the past because you can’t go back and change it and you can’t go into the future to make sure it doesn’t happen again, all you can do it live in the present and where you are right now. Just remember that by residing in that hurt from the past you are then making the choice to remain in that broken place and you can’t heal from what broke you while you’re still there. Until next time… #BeVulnerable #BeForgiving #BeinFaith

Jimmetta Carpenter

Writer/Editor

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Just a quick reminder…

Write 2 Be Magazine wants to be a part of your plan for promoting yourself and your work! Find out more about our promotional campaign by clicking on this link

Also, if you have just finished your book and you are looking for an editor or even just someone to proofread find out how I can help by clicking on this link

https://write-2-be.com/write-2-be-freelance-writing-services/

Lastly, if you would like to contribute to my self-publishing efforts this year here is where you can make a donation to the dream

https://www.gofundme.com/f/book-project-for-write-2-be-media

Even When I Don’t Feel Like It

February 4, 2020 jcladyluv

So normally I would have some thought provoking things to say, like I try to at the start of every week to not only motivate myself but hopefully motivate all of you who read my blog as well. However, today is not going to be one of those days. If I’m being honest, because I try to be as authentic as possible here with you guys, the last couple of weeks have been emotionally and mentally draining and I am not feeling extremely motivated today. So why am I posting today anyway then? Simply put, I made a promise to myself that I would do better at making a habit of writing daily this year.

What that means is that I don’t just want to not write at all because I’m feeling depressed or because I’m feeling mentally exhausted (like the world is about to crumble in on me) because that’s what I’ve done in previous years and then I become absent and then my writing, the one thing that I love more than almost anything (second only to my daughter), becomes non-existent. At that point the only habit that I would have created was that of NOT writing and then I end up with all these ideas stored up in my head with nothing to show for it. They say it takes thirty days to form a habit and this past November when I did NaNoWriMo again after not doing it for a while, I struck up that habit again and I fell even more in love with writing (if that was even possible). After all isn’t that what NaNoWriMo is all about, creating a way for writers who struggle to get in the habit of making writing a daily thing.

So while I may be feeling a little out of sorts today and I am struggling to even find words to write this, I knew that I had to because writing is like breathing for me. I can’t break this habit again because I’ve discovered when I let the days slip by without getting any words down, I become more and more out of sorts and unmotivated, and not like myself and that is not going to get me anywhere. It certainly isn’t going to help get the three books I plan to self-publish this year finished. So that’s all I have for you today and I’m sorry that I couldn’t be more for you but I did my best I just have to hope that it’s enough. Until next time… #BeMindful #BeYou

Jimmetta Carpenter

Writer/Editor

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