Month: January 2023

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Let’s Not Play the Comparison Game

January 23, 2023January 23, 2023 jcladyluv

“Comparison is the thief of joy” ~ Theodore Roosevelt

I try extra hard not to compare things happening in my life to the things that happen in the lives of those around me and in my circle. I would say that out of all of the days in a month, over half of them I succeed in that mission because I know that we can never see what someone else does in their everyday life to achieve whatever level of success they’re having at the moment. In reality the truth is that most of the time, if you are not succeeding at whatever dream you are chasing the problem isn’t someone else’s efforts on their journey but perhaps your lack of effort in your own, or it could just simply not be your time. Most days I remember that. Most.

There are some days, maybe a little over a handful, where you truly feel like you are doing absolutely everything that you possibly can, and you see someone on a similar path as you and everything seems to be working out in amazing fashion for them. Frankly in those few days the shit just feels unfair. You’re working your ass off, pouring everything you’ve got into this dream and vision you have, and sometimes pouring things you don’t have in the emotional tank and still…nothing. You think, how much damn adversity is one person supposed to go through before they just break. That whole notion where it’s just not your time and your time will come just seems like utter bullshit on those days and you’re just mad at anyone who is on the adjacent path and are just traveling along with no bumps or obstacles that YOU can see. Does any of this sound like feelings you’ve dealt with? No! Just me?

Well, I have had a few of those days already for the month of January and I’m telling you, sometimes it just makes me want to throw in the towel and give up on everything. But then I look at my vision board and see this quote I put on there for this very eventual moment. It says, “You didn’t come this far, to ONLY come this far”. I need the constant reminder that I’ve come so much farther than I have to go (at least I hope so because truthfully, I can’t see the entire road ahead of me) and that if I quit now, it will have all been for nothing. Honestly if I didn’t believe in my dream and my vision so emphatically, I probably would have given up on it a very long time ago, but I believe in this and I know this is what I was put here to do.

This is what I need to remind myself of when I start comparing my journey to the road that other people are on because the only thing that accomplishes is it makes me resentful of that person (and that’s not who I am) and it plants seeds of doubt in my own mind about my journey. I have different abilities and limits than the next person and I can’t map out my journey according to someone else’s level of effort and ability because, once again, their journey and mine won’t be the same.

So, when you have those bad days where everyone’s road starts to look so much easier to you than your own, just remember that while it’s natural to have those feelings, you have to put into perspective that the grass is not always greener on the other side of the fence. As the quote says at the top of the post, comparison is the biggest thief of joy and I for one want more joy in my life, I don’t want to be the one stealing joy away from myself. Don’t you allow yourself to be the thief of your own joy. Just make sure to keep watering the grass on your own side of the fence.

Until next time… #BePatient #BeBold #BeMindful

Jimmetta Carpenter

CEO/Writer/Editor

Write 2 Be Media/Write 2 Be Magazine

Be The Example

January 16, 2023 jcladyluv

I wanted to say something in the spirit of Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. today and I was looking over my posts from previous years and it’s sad that things still seem to be in the same state in terms of the world. It always astonishes me when I hear powerful people, politicians in particular, use his quotes and it is evident that they have no idea the message that he was trying to convey. Either the true meaning goes over their head completely or they make a conscious decision to go in the opposite direction of the words he says.

The picture above is one quote I had actually never heard before as one of his, but I can’t think of one that fits the time we are in better. Our leaders in this country are so busy struggling for power and trying to do anything to hold on to that power that they seem to have forgotten that they are only there, in office, to be of service. They are supposed to be there to serve the people of this country.

Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. was a man of service, not just in the fact that he served God as a preacher, but in his service of people and trying to seek justice for all of humanity. He wanted everyone, everywhere, no matter what color you were, no matter what culture you were from, what social status you held, what profession you practiced, to be treated equally. I never understood why it was such a hard concept for some to grasp, but I did understand that for some reason, it was. For some reason I would always be treated differently in some way because I was born with darker skin and because I am from what most would consider a poor status. I am technically considered below the poverty line; I pretty much always have been. But does that mean that I matter any less?

The people in power always proclaim to be for the people but there are certain members of public service who most certainly do not care about the people in this country that they are supposed to be serving, at least not past the campaign stage of things. I think the quote above is something that they all need to keep somewhere in their offices and anywhere they go really because then maybe at some point they will remember that public servants are supposed to serve the public, not their ego, or their wallets, or their professional resume. It would do well for people to remember, on this day in particular, that serving the public is one of the greatest things you can do in life, but only if you are truly serving the people, and not just yourself.

Until next time… #BeMindful #BeCourageous #BeHopeful

Jimmetta Carpenter

CEO/Writer/Editor

Write 2 Be Media/Write 2 Be Magazine

When Does Later Become Now?

January 9, 2023 jcladyluv

I don’t know about you, but I have spent large parts of my life planning for later. I’m a planner by nature so most things I do have to have some kind of plan or else I can’t function. In other words, I am not a fly by the seat of your pants kind of person. I don’t do well with spontaneity (and believe me I have tried). Now you might say, well planning is a good thing. You need a solid plan to build businesses, careers, and to really see your dreams through, don’t you?

The thing about planning so much (or at least as much as I do, which would probably be considered over-planning) is that you’re making plans for what comes later without thinking about what can be done now. I heard someone say the other day that people who always wait and plan to do things later, are people who never get things done. Now I’m sure this wasn’t meant literally because as I said earlier, everything needs a plan of some kind but there is a such thing as planning so much that you become stagnant and unmovable. A point in which you’ve made all of the plans, you’ve done all of the research, you’ve got all of your ducks in a row and then you find yourself so used to being in the planning stage that you start to wonder, well what now. What do I do with all of this planning now?

You start to overthink whether you’ve made all of the right plans. Did you research all of the right things and were your sources of research correct. You begin to wonder if you should now plan all of the ways that things can go wrong and subsequently what do you do when they don’t go as you originally planned. This can become a never-ending cycle of planning and preparation which turns into you never actually getting the thing you’ve been planning all this time for done.

So, with that in mind I’m going to make conscious efforts this year to do the things that I have been wanting to get done for a while right in this span of time that I have now. I don’t want to keep waiting for things to be perfect like I had been doing because that’s never going to happen. There were so many things that I didn’t do last year all because I was waiting for some magical “right” time to happen. I was waiting for everything to fall into place after doing all of the planning and research for the perfect moment. I was waiting for the right circumstances to be in play. But all of that waiting doesn’t bring you success.

You know what I’ve learned by studying really successful people and combing over the facets of their lives and how they built their dreams up into reality? They never waited until later. I mean sure they planned and researched but they didn’t allow themselves to become consumed with the idea of “perfect timing” and what that would look like. They planned and then they leaped and said let whatever happens happen. Did some of them make mistakes along the way? Of course they did but you can’t make mistakes if you don’t take the jump to begin with.

On my vision board there’s a saying that says, “It’s time to trust my instincts, close my eyes, and leap” and that’s what I want to do this year. I’ve spent years planning things out and researching things to the point of exhaustion. This year (as afraid of heights as I am lol) it’s time for me to just close my eyes and take that leap of faith. Faith, not only in myself, but in what God has placed inside of my heart to do and the mark I am meant to leave behind in this world. So, if you’ve been waiting for some magical right time to just go for whatever it is you want, that time is NOW! Just Jump!

Until next time… #BeFearless #BeBold #BeBrave

Jimmetta Carpenter

CEO/Writer/Editor

Write 2 Be Media/Write 2 Be Magazine

Breaking Through the Darkness to the Light on the Other Side

January 2, 2023 jcladyluv

Happy New Year everyone! Welcome to the Year of possibilities! I am more than ready to leave 2022 in the rear-view mirror because, well, to say that 2022 did not go as planned for me would be a massive understatement. Apologies for having been gone for a little while (or at least it feels that way) but I have been having some struggles with life in general thus my mental health has been greatly affected and it has been a lot.

Going into this new year I want to feel motivated to make it better and to get to a point where I’m not just surviving but rather, thriving. I want that for all of us. It would shock no one who knows me that I have some lofty goals for myself this year, although I do think that they are a little paired down from last year’s goals (that did not come to fruition) but I am more about giving myself grace this year for what I don’t manage to achieve. As the realization set in during the month of December that I was going through a state a depression (and honestly had been for months but I was in denial) it was evident that my focus in the New Year truly needed to be on self-care and taking better care of myself.

When I say taking care of myself, I don’t just mean physically but also mentally. In fact, one of my personal goals is to find a therapist and start the counseling I’ve most likely needed for years now. I’ve seen the good that therapy can do for others and while I was never against therapy for myself, I still had not managed to take that step but that changes this year.

Now while my focus is going to be taking better care of myself, I definitely have plans to publish this year. I have two poetry books already finished and that I now have covers for so those will definitely be released this year. I also will be prepping my second novel for publication in the Fall. I have always been one to push through whatever adversity comes my way (admittedly with a little meltdown along the way) but one of the quotes I have on my digital vision board (pictured above) says that stars can’t shine without darkness so if I’m going to shine that just means I have to break through those dark moments and shine brighter than even I could have ever imagined. That brings me to my word of the year, which is Breakthrough. I am long overdue for a breakthrough and that is what I’m working towards this year. What’s your word for the New Year and what’s motivating you going forward? I hope you are having an amazing start to your year and that you will stick around and come along on my journey.

Until next time… #BeMotivated #BeCourageous #BeBright

Jimmetta Carpenter

CEO/Writer/Editor

Write 2 Be Media/Write 2 Be Magazine