When Life Throws You Too Many Battles at Once

It’s hard not to get discouraged when everything seems to be working against you. Lately every time I think things are about to turn around and they start to get a little better for a moment, then yet another obstacle is thrown at me. I know that you’re supposed to be battle tested on the journey to prove you’re worthy of the reward and take whatever life just happens to throw at you but just how many tests are there. More importantly, when does someone let me know what the requirements are in order to be able to say that I passed the tests?

These past couple of days I have felt so defeated. I feel like no matter what I do or how hard I try nothing seems to matter and the end goal still never gets met. It’s either that I’m not trying hard enough or that I’m trying all of the wrong things which results in me running around in circles. I sometimes feel like my constant pushing against every obstacle is pointless and just results in me having a lot of scars from bruises that I’ve collected in my battles.

I know that there is a saying that the difference between a successful person and one who doesn’t become successful is only in the fact that the person who isn’t successful quit right before the breakthrough came. I am in no way, shape, or form, a quitter. I believe in my dreams and I know that I am going to accomplish them just as long as I don’t quit. It’s just not always easy to see that light waiting for you at the end of the tunnel. You start to wonder at certain moments if it’s even there at all and if you’re working towards nothing but more darkness and unknown outcomes.

I am working hard to stay in an optimistic frame of mind and a part of that process is me getting the way I’m feeling down on paper and out into the world. The other part is to just settle my mind and remain hopeful, pray and have faith. I know that better is coming and I just have to be ready when it does. Thank you for being a sounding board when things get a little tough and I hope that you have a process that works to help you push through the difficult times. Until next time… #BeVulnerable #BePersistent #BeinFaith

 

Jimmetta Carpenter 

Writer/Editor 

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How To Get Away With Being Your True Self

Removing the mask

Okay so I know that I am a few days late in writing this post considering that the most talked about moment in television happened on Thursday night on Shonda Rhimes new show “How To Get Away With Murder”. I really just wanted to take time to get my thoughts together because that moment when Viola Davis removed her wig, and then her false eyelashes, and finally all of her make-up, was probably one of the most defining moments in television history to everyone who watched and in particular, to women and just those who struggle with being themselves on a regular basis.

When Davis revealed her true self, or removed all of her body armor as the world is calling it, it was almost as if she was signaling to the rest of the world that it was okay to be yourself no matter what you looked like under whatever mask that you happen to be wearing. This after Davis recently revealed in a speech that she made that she suffered through a childhood of extreme poverty and had at one point in her life felt ashamed of her impoverished childhood.

We all wear the masks. Those faces that we want people to see because what’s behind the mask is sometimes just too painful for us to be able to share with others. We want to cover up all the old wounds and scars from every rejection, every discouragement, every ugliness that lies within us. We tend to have this waiting period before we can reveal our true selves to people before we can take off the masks that we have been wearing far longer than we care to admit.

The thing is if we are only revealing our true selves once we’ve decided someone has proven themselves worthy enough to get that close then are they really getting to know the real us. I think that if we stop trying to figure out who will and won’t like the real us and stop trying to please everyone else around us we need to be happy with who we are and love our own selves enough to not care if there is anyone else who likes us or not. I know it’s easier said than done because what person does not want other people to approve of them but when us needing others approval interferes with us being authentic to who we are it becomes more problematic.

We somehow think that if we are authentic and true to ourselves that the world will disapprove and that people will no longer like us. However, something that I have discovered over the last several years, especially within the context of this blog, is that allowing yourself to be vulnerable to others is really what sets you free and allows you to be who you were meant to be. Vulnerability seems like such a dirty word to most people but if you really think about it, once people see who you really are, odds are, they accept you more. And the people who don’t accept you when you are being your true self aren’t really worth your time anyway.

We shouldn’t be trying to figure out all of the ways that we can get away with deceiving others by making them think we are someone we are not. Instead we should be celebrating the uniqueness within us. If we weren’t so reluctant to remove our armor and so concerned with covering up all of our metaphorical scars then we could see the beauty in letting the world see our flaws and we would celebrate those flaws. Those little imperfections are what makes us perfect in our own individuality. The best way to get away with being our true selves is to not give a damn whether anyone else approves of us or not. Be yourself, remove the armor, and trust that who you truly are underneath that mask that you’ve been wearing all this time is enough.

 

Jimmetta Carpenter

My Write 2 Be is…

CEO/Writer/Editor

Write 2 Be Media/Write 2 Be Magazine

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