Are We the Mistakes We Make?


Judge not, that ye be not judged. For with what judgment ye judge, ye shall be judged: and with what measure ye mete, it shall be measured to you.”

~Matthew 7: 1-3

I swore I was not going to write about this issue and yet here I am getting ready to do just that. We all know (unless you are living under a rock) about the slap heard around the world that happened at the Oscars roughly two weeks ago. Well, I’m not going to say that I believe that Will Smith was right for responding to a tasteless and crass joke about his wife’s medical condition in the manner in which he did, or even that Jada Pinkett-Smith needed to be protected in that way. What I will say is that if you read Will Smith’s book or know anything about his childhood then you can understand why HE felt that he needed to be protective in that way.

Violence is never the answer, and he could have, and should have, handled it differently. However, I will not sit here in judgment of this man who has had a 30 plus year career without nary a blemish and who has been beyond an extraordinary example to all who are watching, over the one time he dared to show that he is in fact a human being and that he does make mistakes just like the rest of us mere mortals. He made a mistake. He is aware of that mistake, and he has since apologized multiple times for said mistake. There is no time machine, and he can’t go back and erase the mistake he made so what more is it that people want him to do?

We cannot keep throwing people away because they display that they are human beings. We get so caught up in the idea of perfection and in us admiring people who have maybe reached the level in their lives that we are seeking to get to that we tend to put them on this unrealistic pedestal. We hold them up as a model (which is fine until you take it too far) of the dreams and levels of success that we strive for and then we act shocked when they make a mistake. It’s almost as if we somehow forgot that just because they are a celebrity or someone in a position much higher than us that they are also human beings just like the rest of us.

I don’t know anyone who has not made a mistake and honestly far worse mistakes than Will Smith made that night. I don’t think that any of us are in a position to judge another man (or woman) by their worst mistakes because Lord help us if we are judged by ours. We don’t (or we shouldn’t) just toss someone aside simply because they disappointed us. We should instead show that person some humility, show that person some grace, show that person some forgiveness and do for them what we want other people to do for us when we mess up. I mean even Jesus got angry and flipped over a few tables (Matthew 21: 12-13) and if Jesus can be imperfect than who are any of us to expect perfection from any ordinary or even extraordinary human being. Be careful who you are tossing aside and make sure that you can measure up to the judgment that you are casting onto them.

Until next time… #BeMindful #BeHumble #BeGracious

Jimmetta Carpenter

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My Greatness Far Exceeds Average

Greatness within you

“Dare to be unrealistic—Being Realistic is the most commonly traveled road to mediocrity”

~Will Smith

I’ve always hated the term average, at least when it referred to me. I think of average as a term to describe someone who is content on things a certain way and never expecting anything greater than that. It is true that I am a person who has a hard time adapting to change and who likes routine but not because I am by any means average. I like to establish some consistency on my journey towards achieving the greatness I know I am destined for. I do believe that having a sense of consistent behavior enables a person to continue to pursue their goals and their dreams.  But as far as ever being content, in that regard I welcome change.

I can’t see myself ever just settling for the way someone else tells me things should be, not when I have my own high expectations for where I end up in life. I think that sometimes my expectations for myself might be far too high and that this is the reason that I get so fearful of tackling the unknown, because I am afraid I won’t live up to my own expectations. However, that isn’t a way go about achieving the great things that I am here to do.

People say that some of the things that I dream up in my mind and that I have on my list of goals are far beyond my reach and that they are a bit unrealistic. For a while I believed that they might be right. But what is being realistic really going to get me? Being realistic might maintain my comfort level and keep me in a place of being content but then that’s not what I want. As much as I hate being in a place where I feel unsure and uncomfortable, I realize that often times it is in those moments of being uncomfortable in which I somehow shine and somehow rise above what seems like impossible circumstances.

If I stay “realistic” about things then I will never go after some of these big dreams I have and I will most certainly never achieve the destiny that was meant for me to fulfill. What harm is there in being unrealistic when it comes to your dreams and what you want out of life? After all, it is your life and shouldn’t you want the most that you can get out of it.

I am not here to be average and mediocre. I am not here to satisfy someone else’s standards of living. I am not here to live up to someone else’s low expectations of me. I am here to be great, and to challenge some people’s ideas of what greatness truly is. I am here to change this world in whatever way that I can. I am here to be unrealistic and uncompromising. So the next time someone tells you that what you are aiming for is unrealistic then you tell them, that’s what you’re here for. Take care and shoot for the moon!

 

Jimmetta Carpenter

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Who Needs A Plan B?

“God gives us dreams a size too big so that we can grow into them.” 

~Author Unknown 

Was it unrealistic for me to think that I could have a successful and fulfilling life as a writer?  Just doing what I love to do full time and not having to make it a side job that I only get to do whenever I am not completely exhausted from working a job that I hate just to pay the bills.  Maybe I was crazy to think that that would be possible in the beginning stages of my writing career and not have a plan B for just in case things went downhill quickly.  

Well the other day I stumbled upon this clip from Youtube of a compilation of comments by actor Will Smith on success and fulfilling your dreams, and his philosophy about different aspects of achieving that success.  One of the most standout statements that he made in the clip was that “the first step, before anybody else in the world believes it, is you have to believe it.  There’s no reason to have a plan B because it just distracts from plan A.” 

When I heard that it made so much sense to me.  Why would I spend all of this time doing something that I hate doing, that keeps me from doing what I really love and really want to be doing, for the sake of just in case.  The time spent on putting together a plan B does two things; it distracts me from the original plan, and it creates doubt as to whether or not plan A was really the right one to begin with.  

Yes it may be unrealistic to bank all of my hopes and dreams and livelihood on plan A without a safety net but why be realistic when it comes to your dreams.  Another thing Will Smith said in this clip was that “being realistic is the most commonly traveled road to mediocrity”, and I believe that to be true.  I’ve never been one to just settle for only what seems possible and within reach.  I’ve always wanted way more than what was within my grasp and there’s absolutely nothing wrong with that. 

We should never settle in life.  You have a dream, you make a plan to attain that dream, and you go for it.  You protect that dream at any and all cost.  It’s really just that simple.  Yes there are times where you are going to have to include things in that plan that you are not thrilled about doing, but in the end it has to be included simply to attain that plan A, and not just in case plan A doesn’t work.  

I think that once you set a plan in motion towards what it is you want, and you decide that you are going to stick to it, everything else will fall into place.  I am glad that I stumbled on that clip because it reminded me that I should never lose faith in myself, and what I believe is possible for me, and more importantly, in what I have decided I want for my life.  To, once again, quote Will Smith, “I know who I am, I know what I believe, and that’s all I need to know.”     

 

Jimmetta Carpenter

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