writing – Page 34 – Write 2 Be

Sometimes It Is Risky to Be Yourself

May 8, 2013 jcladyluv

I can think of about a dozen people who I admire. People whose success I would love to have. People whose life seems so ideal and who I wish I could be like in one way or another. I think that we all have those days where there is someone who we wouldn’t mind trading places with, even for a day. However, we can only ever be ourselves and we have to learn to be the best person that we can be.

People always declare how you should be an original version of yourself and not a bad imitation of someone else. You’re supposed to achieve the level of success you want by remaining true to who you are and not copying anyone else. I definitely believe that a person should always be who they are but being original can be tricky.

There is always the risk that someone won’t be accepting of you or what you do and as a writer, while it is not important for everyone to like you or your writing you have to be accepted on some level to be successful. The thing is, I am me, I am who I am, love me or hate, take it or leave it, and I won’t apologize for it. However, sometimes there are days when I feel like being myself is either not good enough for people or that people just can’t handle who I really am.

I know you’re not supposed to care about who accepts you and who doesn’t but what if I do care? What if I want people to care about my words and my feelings and what I’m going through? What if I want people to listen to what I have to say and what my ideas are and not dismiss them as if they don’t matter? What if I want people to accept me, flaws and all, and stop wishing that I was something that I am not?

Writers are typically thought of as different, and weird, and isolated but that doesn’t mean we want to be. I am definitely not like a lot of other people and I have spent a large part of my adolescent years trying to be what everyone else wanted me to be, never really being who I was. Sometimes it seems like in finally being who I am and not trying to be some version of somebody else I end up standing alone a lot of the time. I wonder whether or not I should have just kept being the copy everyone seemed to like better. Have you ever felt like being yourself just wasn’t good enough?

Jimmetta Carpenter

Writer/Editor

The Diary: Succession of Lies (Now Available)

Writing as “Jaycee Durant”

https://write-2-be.com/

http://unpleasantlyplump.wordpress.com/

http://www.facebook.com/people/Jimmetta-Carpenter/1069480310

Write 2 Be Magazine is now out so please go check it out at http://write2bemagazine.com/. Also please go and join the magazine on twitter https://twitter.com/write2bemag, join the email listing for the magazine or submit a request for an author interview at Write2bemagazine@yahoo.com, and also like the Write 2 Be Magazine fan page https://www.facebook.com/Write2BeMagazine. Please help support my endeavor and my new journey and help me spread the word about Write 2 Be and its meaning.

The Words We Say

May 2, 2013 jcladyluv

I was reading some responses to an email interview that I just did with a wonderful author (the interview will be in the next issue of Write 2 Be Magazine) and something she said in her response to one of the questions struck a chord with me. There is so much power in words that people don’t even realize exists.

There is an old saying that I remember because when I was younger people (people being bullied in particular) would constantly repeat it. “Sticks and stones may break my bones but words can never hurt me”. I don’t know who ever came up with that saying but it couldn’t be any further from the truth.

Words hurt. These days, words can kill, or literally lead to someone not wanting to be on this earth anymore and taking their own life. Words hold so much weight to them. They change lives and they sometimes help people through moments in their lives when they wouldn’t be able to cope otherwise.

I think that sometimes people take for granted how their words can be hurtful to someone or even how much their words can possibly help someone. I think the three words that people take for granted the most are “I Love You”. There are so many children today going through life changing moments in their lives and their going through without feeling like they are loved. There are people who almost never hear those words and the damage that is done by not hearing them.

So if you haven’t been using your words carefully, or wisely, there is no better time to start like the present. If there’s someone that you need to say something to, something you know that they need to hear, don’t take it for granted that you will always have a chance to. Your words can change someone’s life. Just remember that the next time you use your words, that they have power. Don’t underestimate that power.

Jimmetta Carpenter

Writer/Editor

The Diary: Succession of Lies (Now Available)

Writing as “Jaycee Durant”

https://write-2-be.com/

http://unpleasantlyplump.wordpress.com/

http://www.facebook.com/people/Jimmetta-Carpenter/1069480310

There Are Times When I Question, Am I Still Meant To Do This

May 1, 2013 jcladyluv

I was reading the latest blog post on one of the many that I follow and it was about the signs that let you know you were meant to be a writer. It’s funny because lately I’ve been wondering, since I have been a little stalled or slow moving on my latest novel and it doesn’t seem like I am moving as quickly as I would like to with it, does that mean I am not really a writer any more.

I mean sure there are obviously other forms of writing (article writing, blog writing, etc.) that I do and have become better at throughout the years but since novel writing was I initially wanted to become known for, sometimes I feel like I am not as much of a writer anymore. Okay true, those thoughts only last a good minute or so and then I realize that it’s crazy because of course I am a writer.

Well when I was reading the list on this blog post this morning with the signs that you are meant to be a writer I realized that over half of that list applied to me, in fact maybe all but one (there are 11) I could point out as identifying with. However, it made me think of a few more that weren’t on the list (not exactly anyway) that also apply as well.

1) I no longer watch movies and T.V. for pure entertainment but rather more so with the thought in mind of how I could write the script better or how I can write something equally as good.

2) I still read books the traditional way and write in longhand a lot of the time. I know that these old traditions have seemingly been tossed out and replaced with newer (supposedly better) technology but I haven’t given up those old ways of writing and reading.

3) My text messages turn out to be pages in which I go over before sending to check the grammar and spelling to make sure it is written well before sending it.

4) I still believe in writing my own words inside of a card for any special occasion and in fact can take up a whole entire side of a card writing it.

5) My idea of a good night is when I can finally sit down and instead of working on a paper for school or even an article, I can actually work on a novel in progress or ideas for one that has yet to be started.

6) I still wake up with story plots in my head in which I have to actually use the voice memo feature on my phone (which if you knew me you know how much I hate using this feature to record ideas) to get the idea out before I forget it (because my short term memory isn’t as good as it used to be).

7) I love stocking up on notebooks and pretty pens and any kind of really beautiful stationary and have a hard time even going in staples for fear of how much I might walk out with.

These are just a few of the additions that I would make to the list I read this morning in which about ten of the eleven things on it apply to me. It’s not that I need constant reminders of why writing is what I am meant to do but sometimes I start to wonder. You spend so much time working on a craft, and cultivating your career, and having pride in your work that it becomes doubtful when it seems as if none if it is working and like none of the hard work you do is propelling you forward.

I have to keep remembering, slow and steady sometimes is really the best way to do things. I have to have patience because writing makes me happy and it is just that important to me. What signs on this list or the list in the blog post I read can you apply to yourself? What signs do you think you would add that are not on this list?

Jimmetta Carpenter

Writer/Editor

The Diary: Succession of Lies (Now Available)

Writing as “Jaycee Durant”

https://write-2-be.com/

http://unpleasantlyplump.wordpress.com/

http://www.facebook.com/people/Jimmetta-Carpenter/1069480310

What I Got From My Not So Successful Camp Experience

April 30, 2013 jcladyluv

Well this is the last day of CampNaNoWriMo and I wish that I could report that I have finished my novel which is what I set out to do. However, I did not manage to finish the novel. In fact I wasn’t even able to get nearly as much done as I thought I would be able to. Granted I did get some work done on it and I reignited the energy to actually finish it, it’s just that I had wanted to be able to move onto the next project soon and I simply can’t now until this one is finished.

Even though I didn’t make it through camp season with a successful outcome it was not completely without its usefulness. It got me started again when I had been stuck for quite some time. Sometimes when we attempt to do something and manage to fall short of our expected goals we have to keep ourselves from dwelling on what wasn’t accomplished. Instead, we have to focus on the accomplishments that were made and how much further we are in the process then we were before we accomplished those particular goals.

Sometimes it’s not about winning the race so much as it is about showing up and putting in every ounce of effort that we can muster up. So remember when you are pursuing your goals and you are giving it your all that your best is good enough even if you don’t get everything that you were going after. It’s not the winning that matters the most, it’s the fight that you put into the race.

Jimmetta Carpenter

Writer/Editor

The Diary: Succession of Lies (Now Available)

Writing as “Jaycee Durant”

https://write-2-be.com/

http://unpleasantlyplump.wordpress.com/

http://www.facebook.com/people/Jimmetta-Carpenter/1069480310

Who Is In Your Corner?

April 25, 2013 jcladyluv

It is always good to have someone in your corner. Someone who reassures you when your confidence is beginning to waiver and who is going to stand beside you come hell or high water. Everyone deserves to have that kind of support. Typically you are going to find that support within your family and your very close knit friends but what do you say to those who are supposed to be your family and don’t have your back. How do you respond to the people who are supposed to always believe in you telling you that you won’t make it?

I try to figure that out because I have several of those in my family, people who consistently let me know that they don’t think that I am going to reach my destination. I tune them out most of the time but when you hear people talk about not knowing where they would be without their family believing in them it seems sad when I look at my family and think I don’t know where I would be if I were to actually listen to them. Yes I actually do know. I would have given up on my dreams a long time ago because that’s what they’ve always wanted me to do.

Every goal that you go after is always easier to reach if you have a few people standing in your corner. Not a lot of people, just two or three is good enough to help remind you that you are strong enough and to keep you from turning around and running away from the dreams you have for yourself. I know that I may not have family that is standing in my corner, praying that my successes are made a reality, but I do have at least one really good friend, my best friend, who I know will always be there.

We may not always get to have the crowd of believers that we want around us but then again do we really need a big crowd? Sure it would be nice if everyone was as sure of your choices as you are (most of the time) but truthfully you can get where you going without that big crowd. You want that support system in the corner standing by but the most important person that you need in your corner is you.

You have to fight for that dream and you have to do it regardless of whether you are fighting with that big crowd, or you are fighting for it alone. No matter who I have or don’t have in my corner, I know one thing. I have me (and of course God) and that’s all there really is. So no matter how large your corner is expanding make sure that you remember that no one can fight for that dream you have like you can.

Jimmetta Carpenter

Writer/Editor

The Diary: Succession of Lies (Now Available)

Writing as “Jaycee Durant”

https://write-2-be.com/

http://unpleasantlyplump.wordpress.com/

http://www.facebook.com/people/Jimmetta-Carpenter/1069480310

5 Ways to Beat the Fear You Fight Everyday as a Writer

April 24, 2013April 24, 2013 jcladyluv

I used to think (when I was a much younger writer) that all of the really great writers wrote fearlessly. I used to believe that all of the work that the great novelists produced was flawless and perfect from their start until the finished product when it landed on the bookshelves. It never would have dawned on me that writers like Steven King, Terry McMillan, James Patterson, or Sue Grafton just produced excellent first drafts and that they felt no fear at all on whether or not they would be able to get their work published.

Of course now I realize that even the greatest writers were once amateurs or first time novelists once upon a time and that someone had told them no too. It’s easy to think that you are the only one that is afraid of doing what you love but the fact is that you are not. Fear strikes us all, true enough in different ways, but we are all hit with it from time to time, some more than others.

I seem to be one of those people that is paralyzed by it more so than others but I am working on that. I thought of some strategies that I have learned over the years and a couple that I am still trying to put into practice that help me to work on facing those fears instead of burying my head in the sand.

Face the Fear You Feel Head On— The usual response to something that you are afraid of is to run from it as fast and as far away as you can. You can’t to rely on the comfort zone that you have set up for yourself, that place where you know every answer is going to be yes and everyone is going to like whatever it is you do. Where’s the fun in that, or the challenge for that matter. Comfort may be good for a short period of time but it becomes mundane and frankly boring. Do the things that scare you because they are the things that will bring the most rewards.
Let the Rejection That You Fear Fuel Your Drive— Okay it is a given (unless you are the world’s most perfect writer) that you will indeed receive rejection letters in your career. Instead of shying away from doing things that will get you a rejection letter, do them anyway and celebrate the fact that someone actually took the time to write you that rejection letter because while what you’ve submitted may not have been right for them at the time they saw something in your work that resulted in them sending you a letter. When you think about it, they could have just tossed your work and not sent you anything. For every one rejection letter you get, send out ten more query letters. Let those rejection letters do more than just pile up on the corner of your desk.
Know That If You Weren’t Afraid, It Wouldn’t Be Worth It— If you weren’t passionate about your work and it didn’t mean so much to you then you wouldn’t be so afraid of failing at it. Things that mean something to us, things that we know we are good at and that we are supposed to be doing, they’re scary. God forbid you fail at the one thing that you feel deep in your soul you are supposed to be doing with your life. What then? The thing is that you can’t let that fear paralyze you into just not moving forward. Take that fear as a sign that you are, in fact, walking the right path.
Reflect and Refresh—When you are feeling like your work isn’t good enough, take out all of your old work. Look at all of the things you’ve written over the years and how much your writing has grown. Every now and then I do this and I find myself saying “wow, I wrote that” or even “I’ve gotten so much better”. Sometimes when you reflect on your works of the past you have no choice but to acknowledge how much you’ve grown in your work and it motivates you. It propels you forward with that knowledge of knowing your potential to produce greatness.
Just Sit Down and Do It—Fear, or writer’s block as it is most often referred to (okay sometimes it really is writer’s block but not most of the time) has a knack for stopping you from producing anything. Sooner or later you get so scared that you will be rejected that you end up just not writing. This is not going to help you. Fear or no fear, just sit down in that chair, open up that computer, and start writing. Even if you think that it’s bad writing, it’s still writing nonetheless. Write anyway!

Maybe one or more of these ideas will help you tackle that fear that keeps holding you back. I know that it is something that I am still working on to this day but I really think that these strategies will be a step in the right direction. If you have any strategies for overcoming your fears as a writer please share them with me. It never hurts to have enough ammunition to battle the fear with!

Jimmetta Carpenter

Writer/Editor

The Diary: Succession of Lies (Now Available)

Writing as “Jaycee Durant”

https://write-2-be.com/

http://unpleasantlyplump.wordpress.com/

http://www.facebook.com/people/Jimmetta-Carpenter/1069480310

Feeling Like the Rope Just Isn’t Long Enough

April 23, 2013 jcladyluv

There are some days when you just feel like you can’t climb out of the hole you’re in. When the walls start to close in more and more and it starts to feel like you just can’t breathe. I know that everything is not going to always go your way because that would be unrealistic to think that it’s supposed to work like that.

I know what people say about nothing worth having ever being easy. I also whole heartedly believe that when all is said and done God is not going to bring me to a place that he doesn’t feel I can’t pull myself out of (with his help of course). Having said all of that, it doesn’t make it any less stressful and challenging to actually have to go through all of the trials and tribulations that it takes to get to the destination that I am meant to get to in the end.

There are some days when I feel like I don’t have a support system and like I don’t have anyone in my corner and some days that feeling hurts more than others. I feel like I’m walking on this entire journey all by myself. Perhaps that’s how it’s supposed to be but it sure does feel lonely at times. I guess you have to know how to walk alone but it sure would be nice to have a walking buddy at any given point on the path. Then I have to remind myself (and keep reminding myself repeatedly) that I am not the only one walking this path because God is with me, leading the way.

There are those who don’t have to constantly remind themselves that they aren’t walking by themselves on the way to their destination because they don’t have so much worry and they don’t get afraid of being left to go it alone. Then there are those like me, who are terrified that I won’t pick the right door or the right path, and that I won’t make precisely the right decision. I get worried but it’s not because I don’t believe in the path that God has for me, but rather because I don’t want him to give up on me.

I get to the end of that rope and sometimes it just doesn’t seem like it’s long enough. I keep forgetting the things that most people never forget, that I am never walking this path by myself because there are always those second set of footprints in the sand. So if you are anything like me, afraid that you will somehow not be able to pull yourself up and like the rope you were handed just might not be long enough, just remind yourself today that you are not alone on your journey. God is always there leading the way, you just have to trust that he will never guide you in the wrong direction and he will always be on the other end of that rope to pull you back up.

Jimmetta Carpenter

Writer/Editor

The Diary: Succession of Lies (Now Available)

Writing as “Jaycee Durant”

https://write-2-be.com/

http://unpleasantlyplump.wordpress.com/

http://www.facebook.com/people/Jimmetta-Carpenter/1069480310

3 Writers Whose Paths Are Still Teaching Me So Much

April 18, 2013 jcladyluv

I know that there are tons of lessons that I have yet to learn from writers who have already been propelled to a Hollywood level of success that I eventually hope to get to. Writers like J.K. Rowling, Terry McMillan, Tyler Perry, James Patterson, or Sue Grafton. Reading their works, studying their patterns, their habits, are valuable lessons to be instilled in my everyday quest for reaching my goals.

However, there are other writers also, other not yet famous (and I say yet because they are either just getting on their way or they will be) authors that this industry should be on the lookout for. There are 3 writers in particular whose lessons I can’t disregard and one’s that they are currently teaching me for my present circumstances.

Writers like Christina Katz, who for the years that I have been following her blog and her career, has reminded me continually that just because I am a mother does not mean that I can’t raise my career alongside my child and be an awesome Writer Mama. She also has showed me that building a platform is vitally important if you want to become successful within the writing industry and that it’s important to establish that platform before you release the book.

Then there is Catherine Ryan Howard, who is a prime example that being a self-published author is not a death sentence to your writing career but that it could potentially make you more of a household name. Catherine Ryan Howard has a remarkable blog and has self-published several books that are successfully driving her readership higher and higher and her determination is something to be admired.

Speaking of determination, not to mention drive, LaMonique Hamilton, who launched her online magazine, PieHole, just last year, is a writer who I admire greatly. She has such a love and passion for writing and for the media industry in general. She really will be the Oprah of the next generation and her passion for the arts is contagious.

There are many other writers whose names aren’t on someone’s Hollywood hit list yet that we can learn from on our way to career success. Let’s not take for granted the lessons that can be learned on a smaller scale that will help us get to the larger scale that we’re looking to get to. All lessons are important no matter where they come from. Even the small lessons that we learn can lead us to big results!

Jimmetta Carpenter

Writer/Editor

The Diary: Succession of Lies (Now Available)

Writing as “Jaycee Durant”

https://write-2-be.com/

http://unpleasantlyplump.wordpress.com/

http://www.facebook.com/people/Jimmetta-Carpenter/1069480310

The Caliber of the Classics— Has Classic Literature Been Forgotten?

April 11, 2013 jcladyluv

I read a blog post yesterday that questioned whether or not the classics are necessary to be read. It made me remember that I once questioned that myself. I must admit that when I was in high school I didn’t read a lot of the classics that one was supposed to have read at that age. I read some but others I attempted and just couldn’t get through it, at least not then anyway. However, since then I have read a lot of the classics that people always talk about and refer to quotes from as books that are just meant to be read in one’s lifetime and I must say that I think reading the classics makes a writer better.

There was a certain standard in literature that the classics upheld, a certain caliber that they were an example of. A certain level of writing that one had to be qualified to have in order to really truly have their books on people’s shelves. In the days of the classics they wrote deep, thought provoking stories, and breathed a particular depth into their characters.

In today’s society, while you have your writers who have that special something, who are of that caliber and who do uphold those standards of classic literature, there are far too many writers who haven’t met that standard and they don’t hold themselves to a particular style of writing in which they don’t just settle for putting anything on the page. I thought about some of the classics that I have managed to read (some later on than others) that made a difference to me and had an effect on my writing. Maybe some of these had an effect on you too.

Little Women by Louisa May Alcott
Of Mice and Men by John Steinbeck
To Kill a Mockingbird by Harper Lee
Crime and Punishment by Fyodor Dostoevsky
The Great Gatsby by F. Scott Fitzgerald
Pride and Prejudice by Jane Austen
WutheringHeights by Emily Bronte
A Tale of Two Cities by Charles Dickens
The Scarlet Letter by Nathaniel Hawthorne
Gone with the Wind by Margaret Mitchell
The SecretGarden by Frances Hodgson Burnett
The Canterbury Tales by Geoffrey Chaucer

Here are some classics that I still have yet to read (although I should’ve read them already by now) but that I plan on making an attempt to read sometime soon.

A Catcher in the Rye by J.D. Salinger
The Picture of Dorian Gray by Oscar Wilde
Anna Karenina by Leo Tolstoy
Great Expectations by Charles Dickens
One Hundred Years of Solitude by Gabriel Garcia Marquez

What are your favorite classic novels? What classics would you still like to read if you weren’t so busy writing your own novels?

Jimmetta Carpenter

Writer/Editor

The Diary: Succession of Lies (Now Available)

Writing as “Jaycee Durant”

https://write-2-be.com/

http://unpleasantlyplump.wordpress.com/

http://www.facebook.com/people/Jimmetta-Carpenter/1069480310

The Before and the After—A Picture Tells the Whole Story

April 10, 2013 jcladyluv

Anyone who knows me knows that I absolutely hate taking pictures. Not taking pictures from behind the camera lens but to actually be in front of the camera lens itself. So I’ve been on a weight loss journey for the last few years now and I committed to this journey no matter how long it took for me to get to a place of being healthy (and yes thinner too) and happy. I also knew that I couldn’t do this quickly and rapidly because I had tried that before and it didn’t stick and that I didn’t want to lose weight surgically (not knocking it for anyone who has had weight loss surgery—just not for me) but rather naturally and that meant it was going to have to be slow and steady.

I’ll admit that at certain periods throughout the process it has been slower than others and of course there’s moments where you reach a new stage and you plateau. However, I have managed to remain vigilant and have lost well over a hundred pounds but yet I still don’t like taking pictures. My best friend asked me once if I had any before pictures so that I had something to compare things to because I constantly have an issue of looking in the mirror and thinking that nothing has changed regardless of the fact that my clothes have gotten looser on me and my face is visibly different, but as I stated before I have never liked to take pictures with me in them.

So today when I went to the gym (knowing that I had taken a picture for the membership card when I first joined the gym) I asked if I could take a new picture for my membership card. When she took the picture and printed out the new card I took out my old one and looked at the side by side view (you can see it below-sorry it’s not a clearer picture) and the difference was, in my opinion, very noticeable. I was ecstatic and overjoyed and of course I went and showed everyone in the gym my before and after and one lady even pointed to the before picture and asked who it was. That motivated me even more.

Here's my before and after... See the difference! — Here’s my before and after… See the difference!

What does any of this have to do with my writing you might ask? Well you know they say a picture is worth a thousand words and in today’s case my before and after pictures made a lot of things clearer to me. That before picture was not a happy woman, perhaps a woman who faked it with some success, but definitely not happy. But the after picture was a happy person, a more confident person, a more secure person, and a healthier person. It in many ways mirrors my journey of writing that I spoke of with such frustration in yesterday’s post.

My writing career, years ago, around the time of that before picture, was existent (barely) but it wasn’t moving in any direction. It had gotten off the ground (maybe about a couple inches) but it hadn’t took off, it hadn’t even gotten midway, it was just stagnant hovering somewhere around the point of the wheels of a plane being an inch off the ground but not yet ready to take off. It has been a slow journey in that regard as well but unlike with my weight loss journey where I had succumb to the reality that slow and steady is better for me and in the end will garner more promising results, more lasting results, with writing I had wanted it to be a rush to take off. I hadn’t thought about the fact that if slow and steady can win the race in one area, why wouldn’t it be the right track in the other area as well.

My writing career is still definitely not where I want it to be but it is definitely beginning to take shape and it seems to be ready to take off. Just as with my before and after pictures in my road to a healthier and happier version of myself, I couldn’t see the progress before and it appeared as if nothing was really happening, my writing career has its before and after points as well. My writing career, my writing style, has changed and taken different shapes right along with me and looking at the body of my work over the years I can see the progress now. I can see the fruits of all of my hard work and I am just as overjoyed at that as I was to look at my before and after pictures from this morning.

Sometimes to see the bigger picture, you really do have to capture it in a picture. A picture doesn’t just show the physical changes in a person but sometimes you can see a whole story in the person you are looking at in that picture, the emotional changes, the mental changes, the career changes. So what would your before and after of you look like? What story would it tell to the world?

Jimmetta Carpenter

Writer/Editor

The Diary: Succession of Lies (Now Available)

Writing as “Jaycee Durant”

https://write-2-be.com/

http://unpleasantlyplump.wordpress.com/

http://www.facebook.com/people/Jimmetta-Carpenter/1069480310