Tag: balance

The Struggle to Find the Balance

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What is balance these days? I’d like to think that I know how to balance things pretty well but then I have to remind myself that multi-tasking is not really the same thing as balance. Then again, I guess that depends on what I mean by balance. I don’t mean balance in the sense of juggling all of the many tasks that you have to do on any given day. I mean knowing when you’ve taken on too much and you need to just sit out a few rounds and pick up where you left off later. That is the type of balancing act that I struggle to conquer.

I am an all or nothing type of person most of the time. I don’t like to do anything half-way, it’s either I throw my whole self into whatever task it is, or I would just rather not do it at all and wait until I can give it my full effort. The problem with that way of thinking sometimes is that you can very easily end up with a lot of things not getting done or burning the candle at both ends trying to make sure that everything does get done.

Last week I got really lazy (at least it was lazy in my mind) and while I didn’t just throw all of my projects and work to the side, I certainly was not nearly as productive as I know that I could have, or should have been, if I were giving it my full effort. I was just tired. I was mentally tired. I was definitely physically tired (given quite a few physical issues that have been aggravated over the last few weeks) and quite honestly, I was emotionally tired.

I’ve been stressed about a couple of different things, not just creatively (or should I say writing business wise) but financially as well. I hadn’t even realized just how stressed the financial thing had me until it looked like there was finally going to be some resolution on that front last week and I just breathed a heavy sigh of relief and the realization of just how stressed that had me hit. I just didn’t feel like doing much of anything last week and I allowed myself to lean into that feeling.

Now going into this week, I know that I can’t be the same amount of unproductive as I was last week and frankly, I feel a little more refreshed, so I am ready to get back to the creating of things. But I think that having that balance of allowing myself to lean into the “lazy” feeling last week helped. I think every once in a while, it would be okay to just not put quite as much pressure on myself to get everything done. It was just far too much.

We have to know when to stop juggling all of the things in the air and to just let a few of those tasks fall by the wayside. It’s not as if putting off one or two things is going to completely throw everything off course (and if it would then those are the tasks you absolutely should not drop) and you won’t be able to get back to them the next day. We have to find the balance between being able to do it all and not draining ourselves physically and mentally actually trying to do it all. You’re not alone in trying to manage everything because I haven’t got it all figured out just yet either. We can learn how to balance together.

Until next time… #BePatient #BeMindful #BeKindtoYourself

Jimmetta Carpenter

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Why Do Old Habits Have to Die?

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Wouldn’t it be really nice if we could just balance out all of our habits to work all in one accord with one another? Or am I the only one who, when I further develop good consistent habits in one area other areas begin to suffer? A couple of years ago I had been vigorously working out, consistently and faithfully, and I had been on and off with the habit but around that time I had finally gotten my shit together health wise. I cut out most of the unhealthy foods; I don’t really eat a lot in terms of quantity but I had gotten really good at keeping my diet on track; I even got to the point where it just felt wrong to not go to the gym and work out. But you know what wasn’t as consistent as I wanted it to be then? My writing!

Cut to a couple of years and two car accidents later (one in which I was hit walking across the street by a truck) and my working out has obviously grown stagnant again and my diet, well we’re not even going to get on that (I mean I still eat mostly health but I’ve snuck a lot of the junk snack food back in somehow). I can’t workout as hard as I used to and definitely not everyday like I used to because of the physical issues that stem from the accidents that I keep messing up my recovery from because I’m hard headed and I tend to try to exercise as hard as I used to and then I re-injure myself which delays the healing. It’s frustrating as hell and I was at least going to the gym to do some strength training but then the world shut down and even though the gyms have opened up again I personally don’t feel comfortable going back right now until they get a better handle on COVID.

That said, my writing habit has never been better (well not since I was a college student anyway) and I am continually developing my writing routine to work better and better and trying different methods to determine if there’s routines that work even better for me. Although I have not found a solid writing routine that I can use day after day, I have still been extremely productive and I am absolutely loving the work that I have been able to get accomplished and it’s been wonderful. But again, when one habit is strengthened the other one (working out) seems to fall by the wayside.

Is there some secret to balancing everything so that it all works together? If there is I want to know because it frustrates me to no end to struggle in something so much, finally hit my stride, and then get the other thing I’m struggling in on track only to fall off track with the first thing. I suppose in this case my physical limitations have played a part in my falling off track with the workout but the perfectionist in me just says I need to suck it up and just push harder anyway (until I’m exercising and then my knee or my back will quickly let me know that I’m doing too much).

I suppose that just means that the area that I really need to work on most is the one in which I realize that I am not Superwoman and I can’t do it all and that I can’t just ignore what my body tells me not to do. I suppose balance is all in the hands of the producer (lol). Well that is my Monday rant and I really would like to know what you guys do to find balance in your life with the things that you love to do? Until next time… #BeProductive #BeMotivating #BeInspiring

 

Jimmetta Carpenter 

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The Never Ending Balancing Act: Structure versus Spontaneity

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Change versus Spontaneity post

I’ve been thinking over the weekend about change. There are a lot of experts that advise you that change is good and that you shouldn’t be resistant to it. Then you have plenty of experts on the opposite end of the spectrum that say that setting deadlines is a good thing and that having structure and routine is something that can help stabilize someone’s life and help them to stay focused on the journey ahead of them.

I tend to lean more to the side of routine and structure, perhaps I lean a little too far in to it. It’s no secret to anyone who truly knows me that no matter how open I appear to be to change and spontaneity, I am extremely resistant to it. I’d like to say that I’ve only recently grown a barrier to the idea of change but I think I’ve always been this way since I was a little girl. I like knowing what’s going to happen, to know the way the day is going to go and precisely what I’ll be doing and when. That kind of structure pretty much guarantees the same outcome and while that may seem boring to some, it’s also safe. I guess the problem is that it may be a little too safe.

The odd thing is that the kind of life I’ve always dreamed of having for myself, since I was ten years old, could never be possible without embracing the idea of change and being spontaneous. There are a lot of things that I would change about my life and one of the things at the top of that list is my resistance to change itself, and my anxiety over the things that I do not know. So what is the right way to go about things?

Do you go with throwing caution to the wind and embracing every change that comes your way or do you plan and set deadlines and stick to a structure that helps keep you on track? I suppose that is what I struggle with because I want to be spontaneous and accept whatever changes may come my way but then I lose my balance and the shifts that begin to happen don’t allow me to stay focused and on track. Where is the middle ground on change versus structure? Is there a good balance between being overtly open to every changing scenario and still keeping enough structure to stay on course?

It’s easy for me to just say that structure is what works for me and leave it at that but if it was truly working then I would be where I want to be by now. Perhaps the very reason I haven’t reached that next level just yet is because I’m too afraid to reach out and grab the ledge above me because that means I would have to actually let go. To let go is scary. That means I have to trust what’s coming next, in an outcome that I can’t see.

Change is necessary to go to the next step on my journey and I know that but it’s hard to not know how things will turn out. So I guess the question is can I have structure and still fully open myself up to change or am I just going to keep holding on to the things that I already know. I don’t know how I truly feel about letting go of the structure that keeps me so grounded but I guess this year (my year of no excuses) will help me see just how open I can be.

Jimmetta Carpenter

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My Balance Is Still Off

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Finding Balance 1

This week is almost over and while I have accomplished some things on my to do list for this week (okay maybe only one thing really), I have not done nearly enough towards what needs to be done. When I think about the fact that January is almost over and my novel hasn’t even been touched yet this month I shake my head at myself. True enough I had some things I needed to get out of the way promotion wise before working on my novel but then when I think about it, is that just an excuse.

I said that this was going to be the year that I probably sleep a lot less to achieve my tasks but I’m torn between my drive to succeed in my writing and my drive to get healthier and get my weight loss journey back on track which includes getting more sleep so that my body can be in the best position possible in order to lose the weight that I need to lose and gain more self-confidence and self-acceptance. It’s hard when I put it out there in writing like that because it’s either my dreams and my vision or my health and prolonging my life.

It seems like it would be an easy choice but it’s really not. I do find that when I’m healthier (and that includes getting the proper, or close to proper, amount of sleep) I do produce more in my writing and my creativity is at its best. However, then I see the people that I admire and look to for knowledge and know-how producing massive amount of product and their projects coming one, after another and you see the number one thing they practice is working into the wee hours of the night and getting a very minimal amount of sleep.

That is not me comparing myself to others (not really) because I know that I am not them but that is me acknowledging that to put out more work requires more time and that more time means less of something, typically sleep. I am still working out the balance to get the ball rolling here but I have yet to feel like I’m getting off to a good start. I almost feel like I didn’t start preparing for this year soon enough at the end of the last one. But how much preparation can you do before you should actually begin doing instead of just planning to do.

Balance and focus seem to be a continuing issue and it has to be figured out and quickly if I want this year to go the way that I want it to go. I’m still learning and while I know that there should never really a point in life that you stop learning, I feel like I’m too old to still be trying to figure it out. And yet, I still press on!

 

Jimmetta Carpenter

My Write 2 Be is…

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NaNoWriMo Day # 20: Have You Learned How to Balance and Weave?

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It’s hard to find balance when you are trying to juggle so many tasks at once.  Writing a novel is not an easy task and when you take on the added pressure of participating in National Novel Writing Month and having to write every single day and write a specific amount of words just to meet one specific goal.

If you add to that the pressure of completing the other projects and tasks that you have to do that also concern your writing career such as keeping up with your blog, making that deadline for the novel or non-fiction book that you need to get to your editor, or the articles that you are being paid to write by a specific time, it can be extremely hard to find that balance to handle it all.  Here are a few suggestions on how you can balance your Novel and your other writing projects and weave them into one another, if you can.

1)      Separate your writing tasks and times over different days.  For instance, choose to work on your novel for NaNoWriMo at one time period of the day (in the morning or in the evening) and work on one of your other writing assignments in the opposite time period of the day.  If you have multiple tasks aside from your NaNoWriMo novel then split it up and do one task on one day and another on another day.

2)      If your main writing tasks aside from doing your NaNoWriMo novel is doing your blog then weave the two tasks together.  Blog about your NaNoWriMo experience.  Blog about your novel and how the process of writing your novel is going.  Blog about your characters and allow your readers to get to know them before your novel even gets published and comes out.  This will allow your blog posts to come a little easier to you while under the pressure of writing your novel and still keep you on course with maintaining your blog.

3)      Write your articles that have to be written about your experience of NaNoWriMo.  Write articles about your process of writing your novel.  Write the articles that you are submitting for payment about having to balance your novel with your other tasks of being a writer, a business person, and a parent.  These articles will not only come easier because you are living that experience but they won’t take too much extra thought process and research (that it would take to do the health related article you would normally be writing right now) which would be time taken away from writing your novel.

4)      If you honestly are not good at balancing the multiple writing tasks then focus on the novel and write notes regarding the other projects you need to work on in a notepad.  This allows you to focus on that novel, get it done, and still not lose the ideas that you have for your other projects.  That way when you are finished with NaNoWriMo and your novel you can immediately go implement the ideas and notes that you jotted down with your other projects.

I hope some of these suggestions help you keep that balance and get that novel done.  There’s only ten more days so hang in there.  You can do this!

 

Jimmetta Carpenter

Writer/Editor

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