The Picture Isn’t Always Perfect

Nothing is Picture Perfect 2

Oftentimes we like to paint a picture for people that things in our world are running smoothly. We like to put a smile on to pretend that things are perfect even if they aren’t. We like to highlight the things that are going well and leave out all of the mistakes that we have been making as we go. It’s the whole fake it until you make it syndrome. It’s not necessarily a bad thing to have positive self-talk and to tell yourself that you can do this or that, even if deep down you are unsure of your capabilities. But to leave out the things that went wrong in your journey sometimes does a disservice, not only to you but to the people that you hope to inspire along the way.

If you think about it, there are no real mistakes in life. Everything that happens to us or even for us is by design and has already been mapped out by God. Even the slight detours we take are to teach us something, to show us what we are made of when we start to lose sight of the true depth of our purpose. It is in the failures that we truly triumph because we learn perseverance and it forces us to get back up again even when we don’t feel like we can.

I’ll admit that it feels good when you are presenting yourself to people as if you have everything all together and figured out. Particularly in the instances where you want to impress someone who impresses you, you want to seem like you can make all the pieces to the puzzle fit perfectly. Sometimes you fake it so well that you may even start to believe it yourself and it kind of gets you motivated in a way you may not have been otherwise.

The problem with faking it is that in leaving out the mistakes that you have made you also tend to leave out the lessons that you have learned from those mistakes as well. The people that you want to inspire and who may be looking to you for guidance are being mislead by this false perception of what success looks like and that really isn’t fair to them or you. There is no such thing as a flawless road to success and trying to pretend that there is only makes things look pretty on the outside, but it doesn’t change the reality of how messy the journey really is.

Stop trying to make everything look easy to everyone else because by doing that you diminish all of the hard work that you have likely put into your journey. Your path has more substance because of the obstacles and failures that you have had as you have walked along it. All those times you fell that you would like to instantly forget are important because they taught you that you are not a quitter and that you can get back up again. The detours on that straight and narrow road that you had planned to take likely gave you something that you needed at those particular times. Don’t leave out what you believe are the bad parts of your journey because odds are the good that came out of it wouldn’t have happened any other way.

 

Jimmetta Carpenter

Writer/Editor

https://write-2-be.com/

http://write2bemagazine.com/

http://unpleasantlyplump.wordpress.com/

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An Agent of Change

agent of change 3

There’s something about myself that I readily admit to people but that I am not entirely proud of. I absolutely do not like (strongly detest) change. I like things to be a certain way, I have a routine that I follow, pretty much to the tee and I don’t particularly like to deviate from that routine. In my mind it keeps things balanced, it keeps things flowing smoothly and it keeps a sense of order. Well at least that’s what I had convinced myself of.

I’ve been working a lot more over the last couple of years on my spiritual growth and on improving my relationship with God. I’ve been steadily working on following God’s instructions for my life and the direction that he wants it to go in. It’s a path that has brought me so much peace and joy and it has helped me rediscover who I am again. I hadn’t even realized that I had somehow lost who I was and forgotten what it was I was supposed to be doing, my purpose.

Sitting in church the other day as my pastor talked about growth, and that change equals growth so if you hate change than you can’t grow. It was a moment of clarity (one of many I have had recently). He spoke about how if you’re listening to God’s instructions for your life and following the path he wants you to be on, which is not always the path you had intended to take, then you have to be willing to open yourself up to something different, something new. You can’t hear the instructions for your life and then, because they don’t exactly fall in line with your daily routine, just not take action on the instructions that you have been given.

I’m a creature of habit and I had always led myself to believe that it wasn’t entirely a bad thing that I had set plans, set times in which to do things, set days in which to work on this or that, that I knew what I would be doing any given day at any given time because it would be the same. I call it routine but some might call it being stuck and unmoving. They would be right. I had never thought of my growing habitual routines as being afraid of changing but I can see now that it was exactly what I was afraid of doing.

If I changed things what if something bad happened. If I changed my routine what if the outcome was a bad one. I think I had gotten to a point where I had just made it so that nothing would happen that I didn’t already know was going to happen. That way there would be no bad outcomes, there would be no rejection, and no one could say no. I didn’t realize that it also meant that nothing good could happen either, and that no one could say yes. How could I say I was open to new opportunities of any kind if I was unwilling to change?

It’s not going to be easy to dial back my need for having a habitual routine. It’s opening myself up for an outcome that I don’t know and the thought of that is downright frightening. However, if I truly want to grow and reach new goals, and soar to new heights I have to be willing to change.

Change can be scary but it’s critical in order for us to grow. We can’t get so hung up on sticking to what we know and what our routine is that we miss the opportunities that are waiting for us right outside our little box. The box is good at times and we tell ourselves that the box protects us but does it really? Or does that box that we try so hard to keep ourselves in only hinder us from reaching our fullest potential? Our greatest accomplishments and our highest of heights tend to lie beyond the confines of the box of comfort that we trap ourselves in.

 

Jimmetta Carpenter

Writer/Editor

https://write-2-be.com/

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Letting Go of What Holds Me Back

Letting Go of Whats holding me back

I had a conversation with a very successful singer/songwriter a few weeks ago right at the point where I was starting to feel my creative block turn a corner. It was an unexpected phone call through a friend who knew that I needed the motivation and we had a 45 minute conversation about artistry and creativity. We talked about fear and being blocked and pushing past those obstacles that are in your way to fulfill a purpose.

Truthfully I suffer with bouts of depression and when these periods of depression come on (far more often than I would like) I get stuck in this fog of gloominess for an indefinite period of time. After talking to this artist I felt reinvigorated and once again energized but the fog was still there. For anyone who has ever suffered with depression or is currently suffering from it then you know to just say I don’t want to be in this state anymore is not enough.

One of the main things I remember her telling me in our conversation was that I needed to write down my list of fears because the fear is what is paralyzing me and sending me into depression. Then she said once I had written down everything that was paralyzing me with fear I needed to work on letting it go. I am guilty of dwelling in things for far too long. I dwell in the things I can’t change more specifically and I dwell in things that I fear that haven’t even happened yet. I get hit with a setback and I completely sit in the stickiness and muddiness of that mess of a setback and I dwell there.

It’s not something I am proud of but I figure if I can admit that this is my problem then I can better work on fixing it. So that’s what I am working on, letting go of those fears that old me back and that paralyze me. Learning to let go of the routine of things because the fact is that things do change and everything will not always go how you planned it out. My life is definitely not where I want it to be and in order to get it there I need to get over the fear of change and let go of all of the negative self-talk bouncing around in my head. Some things you just can’t hold onto forever.

 

Jimmetta Carpenter

My Write 2 Be is…

CEO/Writer/Editor

Write 2 Be Media/Write 2 Be Magazine

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The Time to Incite Change is Now

Yesterday was one of those days that make you want to incite change, not only within yourself but in the world.  Between it being Martin Luther King Jr. day and the Inauguration day of President Barack Obama you couldn’t help but to be inspired and hopeful for the bright future that this country has ahead and the mark that you could someday leave on it.  It just feels like the time to change things is now and that in this present moment you have to be willing to stand up and be that difference that this world needs.

When I think of all of the great people who incited the change that has been made in this world, I think about the fact that these were people who refused to remain silent or stand still.  They were people who didn’t care if no one else shared their beliefs or their opinions they were going to make their belief and opinions heard anyway.  They were not going to be afraid to step outside of the box that other people kept trying to keep them in.  They weren’t afraid to be that change that the world needed and make their mark.

I would like to think that I have already started on that journey to make a great change within this world.  While it is only the beginning of this year, with the release of my new magazine and my first guest blog post, which was published last week, that seems to be well received, I am feeling more and more like everything is starting to fall right into place.  There are so many things that I want to do in this world and so much change that I want to make.

My dream started off with just writing, then evolved into wanting to build a publishing house, and evolved even more into wanting to create a media empire to pass on to my daughter that not only encourages artists to not conform to what society says they should be, but that they should celebrate their uniqueness.  I also, as I saw my daughter begin to experience the bullying that I also once went through as a child, developed an urge to want to use my message for my media company to begin communicating to young children that they should feel okay with being who they are and know that being different is not something to be ashamed of but rather something to embrace.

I’m not sure what it is about this year that feels so different but it just feels like it’s going to bring about the changes that I’ve been waiting for.  Of course some of those developments I am working towards are still in the making but I feel like I’m getting so much closer to my destination.  I am going to change this world, in my own way and in my own time.  I believe all of us have that power.  We just have to tap into it.  Did yesterday inspire you to want to move toward change?

I have the Write 2 Be Motivated and Empowered… What is your Write 2 Be?

 

Jimmetta Carpenter

Writer/Editor

The Diary: Succession of Lies (Now Available)

Writing as “Jaycee Durant”

https://write-2-be.com/

http://unpleasantlyplump.wordpress.com/

http://www.facebook.com/people/Jimmetta-Carpenter/1069480310

Write 2 Be Magazine is now out so please go check it out at http://write2bemagazine.com/.  Also please go and join the magazine on twitter https://twitter.com/write2bemag, join the email listing for the magazine or submit a request for an author interview at Write2bemagazine@yahoo.com, and also like the Write 2 Be Magazine fan page https://www.facebook.com/Write2BeMagazine.  Please help support my endeavor and my new journey and help me spread the word about Write 2 Be and its meaning.

NaNoWriMo Day # 7: Change of Venue Can Enrich Your Story

Hopefully your novel is coming along well and your story is developing even further than before.  You might be starting to feel restless sitting in your office area day after day to work on your story and before you know it you could be using that as an excuse not to write.  Before that happens, before you suddenly find yourself blocked with your story no longer flowing, get out of your office.

Now don’t take to mean that you should just stop working on your novel.  What I mean is that perhaps it is time to change your environment that you are writing in.  Changing your scenery and your surroundings can really help to get your story going again, and perhaps it will even change your story in a different direction.  Try going to the library, a bookstore, or your nearest Starbucks to work on your novel.  I know that when I go to Starbucks it somehow opens up all kinds of scenarios for my story and sometimes I will even be sparked by the conversations that are surrounding me.

Your story can really be further developed just by getting out of your comfort zone and changing up the way you do things.  You might even discover a whole other side to your main character that you didn’t even realize was there.  So if you’re looking to give your writing process a little more variety and make it a little more lively, then get out there and go write somewhere else for a change.  You may be able to find a WriteIn in your area by searching on the NaNoWriMo website.  No matter where you write, just keep on writing!

 

Jimmetta Carpenter

Writer/Editor

The Diary: Succession of Lies (Now Available)

Writing as “Jaycee Durant”

https://write-2-be.com/

http://unpleasantlyplump.wordpress.com/

http://www.facebook.com/people/Jimmetta-Carpenter/1069480310

http://www.passionatewriterpublishing.com/thediary.htm

www.lulu.com/ladybugpress

The Questions We Ask Ourselves, and God (Part 3): When Are Things Going To Change?

“If you don’t like something change it; if you can’t change it, change the way you think about it.” 

~Mary Engelbreit 

When you get stuck in a period of your life where nothing seems to be going the way that you think it should be you will start to question when things are going to change for you?  The answer to that is simple but we tend to make it much more complicated then it has to be.  Things will change when you make the decision to change them.  

I know how it feels to be in that place where everything is going wrong.  You think that things are going so bad that they can never get better.  You start to wonder what you did to bring this kind of ‘bad luck’ your way.  You even go over in your head things you could have done in a different way so that maybe things wouldn’t feel so impossible.  You start to contemplate whether you will come out of that bad place long enough to make your dreams a reality.  It’s a place that nobody likes to be in.  But you don’t have to stay there.    

Your attitude towards whatever your circumstances are determines the outcome of those circumstances.  If you stay insistent that nothing is going to get better, that nothing is going to change, then why would you be surprised when they don’t.  You attract what it is that you want so if you want to gain control of that situation and you want things to turn around then you have to change your mindset.  Nothing is going to change if you don’t believe that it can. 

Whatever your dreams are, it is never too late for them to come true.  You may be down but you most certainly are not out.  If you know that there are some things in your life that you need to change, all you need to do is take that step to change it.  When you take that step that is when things are going to start to change for you.  You just have to believe that they can, in fact, change.     

Jimmetta Carpenter

Writer/Editor

The Diary: Succession of Lies (Now Available)

Writing as “Jaycee Durant”

https://writetobe.wordpress.com/

http://unpleasantlyplump.wordpress.com/

http://www.facebook.com/people/Jimmetta-Carpenter/1069480310

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My New Year’s Wish for All of You

I just wanted to take some time out to wish all of you a Happy New Year.  I will be embracing the year 2012 with the faith that this will be a good year for me and that it will bring new adventures and experiences for me.  Last year I went into 2011 saying that it was going to be a good year for me, but in the back of my mind there was always doubt there and I didn’t really believe that it would be.  This year I am going to have faith and confidence that it will.  I wanted to encourage everyone to embark on this upcoming year embracing the idea of change and being fearless.  I pray that all of you will go into the New Year with confidence and faith that whatever you are wanting for yourselves this year will happen.  Until tomorrow…Have a Safe and Blessed New Year’s Eve! 

 

Jimmetta Carpenter

Writer/Editor

The Diary: Succession of Lies (Now Available)

Writing as “Jaycee Durant”

https://writetobe.wordpress.com/

http://unpleasantlyplump.wordpress.com/

http://www.facebook.com/people/Jimmetta-Carpenter/1069480310

http://www.passionatewriterpublishing.com/thediary.htm

www.lulu.com/ladybugpress

If Your Spirit is Willing

“The art of life is a constant readjustment to our surroundings.”
~ K. Okakaura 

One of the major things that tend to hold us back in our lives is resistance. We tend to over analyze situations so much that we end up only seeing what the negative would be and totally ignoring the positive.  We, in a sense, resist living freely and choose to move more cautiously through life which only hinders us.  Now while caution is, at times, a good thing, it closes the door to countless opportunities that may come your way in life that require you to throw caution to the wind.  Sometimes we just need to step out on faith and say yes instead of no because if all we ever do is say no when opportunity knocks at our door then eventually opportunity will stop knocking. 

Our spirits are always willing participants to new adventures and to opening new doors but sometimes we have to actually listen with our hearts instead of always letting our mind control everything.  We can’t over think things and talk ourselves out of going for everything we can grab in life or else we’ll keep coming up with nothing.  We have to sometimes do the things that we never thought we would do and go the places that we always said we would never go because somewhere in those things that we never do lies a possible opportunity that can take us to another level in life.  We strive to move forward in life but moving forward involves allowing the move to happen and not resisting so much that you have to be dragged kicking and screaming.     

We grow through our experiences in our lives but if we never say yes and allow ourselves to actually experience life then we don’t grow, we remain stunted.  When I think about how many opportunities for growth that I have missed out on by being so resistant and unwilling to say yes and experience something foreign to me I start to have so many regrets about what could be and about where I could be in my life. But what’s done is done and I can’t change that but I can be more willing now. I have promised myself that for every time that I say no to something I will find three other times where I will say yes.  I don’t want to miss out on my blessings because I was too afraid to say anything else but no.  Life is too short for me to have to look back on what I’ve done in life and have to think I could’ve done so much more if I had just been more willing.  After all what’s the worst that could happen?

Jimmetta Carpenter

Writer/Editor

The Diary: Succession of Lies (Now Available)

Writing as “Jaycee Durant”

http://www.passionatewriterpublishing.com/thediary.htm
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Published in: on April 5, 2011 at 12:00 AM  Leave a Comment  
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