A Point of Light

Point of Light

I came across a speech that Tyler Perry made at a conference a couple of weeks ago, nothing too long but as always with anything he has to say it was extremely effective. He spoke about having and being a point of light. Of how we all have that person or those people who have a certain power to pull you out of those deep dark places that your mind can tend to go to when you are struggling along your journey to success. Or that can physically rescue you from a situation that you should no longer be in anymore. He also spoke of how we too can be that point of light for others and that maybe some of us already have been that for people and we may not even realize it. He spoke of how whatever we do in this life should have a purpose, a point, that can help others pull themselves out of that dark place.

After I finished watching his speech I thought about how I hope that I could someday be that for someone else because I could already pinpoint at least three people who have been that point of light for me. Then I thought about my blog and how, even though I am mostly just expressing my own thoughts or opinions about things, sometimes I will come across a comment that someone left me telling me how something I wrote inspired them or helped them that particular day. It gives me chills to think that I might actually be doing what I set out to do when I created my Write 2 Be brand and that all of the ideas that I have for Write 2 Be to inspire others and be a guiding point for those who are cautiously walking along the path of who they are meant to be.

The whole message of Write 2 Be is to get people to understand that you don’t have to worry about what other people or society thinks about, that you should focus on being the very best version of yourself that you can because as much as society can voice their opinion about someone doing this or that, they can’t be that person, they can’t be you. My message is strongly geared at children, particularly those who have been or are being bullied for being different, for being unique, and being special so that these future creative geniuses won’t apologize for being different and so that they don’t feel that they need to be anybody else but who they were born to be. They have that right to be whoever it is they want to be, whoever it is that God placed them on this earth to be.

So I hope that Write 2 Be will be that point of light for these young creative geniuses coming up, and even for the ones who have already created their little niche but struggle with wanting to fit in with everyone else who might not have your unique vision and perspective. I certainly think that Tyler Perry and Oprah Winfrey, and Cyrus Webb are points of light and of course my best friend who is a media mogul in the making LaMonique Hamilton. They are people who inspire me and show me that if you want something bad enough you can make your dream happen but not only that, that you can help others make their dreams happen as well just by not being afraid to fulfill your purpose and be unapologetically yourself.

So find time this weekend to honor your points of light but also to most importantly be a point of light for others. There is no other more rewarding feeling than knowing that something you did or said helped or inspired someone else, that you were the light that pulled them through, even if only part of the way!

 

 

Jimmetta Carpenter

My Write 2 Be is…

CEO/Writer/Editor

Write 2 Be Media/Write 2 Be Magazine

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When Having It All Can No Longer Masks the Pain

hiding behind a smile

The passing of Robin Williams on Tuesday has understandably left the world shocked and speechless. I personally felt like the world lost a little part of its magic because he was such a funny human being that brought so much joy into people’s lives. Obviously I never met him so I can’t speak to who he was with first-hand knowledge but he was one of those people that you always felt, in watching him, that you could relate to him. He was inspiring to watch and on the days when I just didn’t feel like much of anything he made me laugh.

One of the things that I am hearing most is how it could be possible that someone who made everyone around him laugh so much wasn’t happy himself. If anything good comes from his tragic death it is the open forum that it leaves for us to really take a look at what depression is. I find it striking just how many creative people, writers, comedians, actors and actresses, singers, dancers’, just creative types in general, struggle with depression. What’s even more alarming is that the majority of comedians in particular are said to be masking the reality of their inner pain with the outward satisfaction of making others pain go away with a moment’s laughter.

People don’t talk about depression, as if it is something to be ashamed of. And then there are some who just don’t take depression seriously because it is a disease that you can’t see. I know that I personally suffer from bouts of depression and feelings of hopelessness. A lot of my writing serves as my own brand of therapy to cope and sometimes it helps and others it doesn’t. There were many times in my teens and my early twenties that I just didn’t want to be here on this earth anymore and there were attempts made that weren’t successful (obviously) but it’s just never been something to talk about with people. I am only recently starting to talk to my closest friends about the depression that I suffered and that I sometimes still feel creep up inside of me when things seem to not be going right.

Talking about depression doesn’t make it go away but it certainly does help people who are dealing with it feel less alone. In talking with others you sometimes realize that you aren’t the only one who is suffering with this disease. More importantly we need to open up a discussion about it because it doesn’t just strike in adults, it oftentimes starts when you are a child. Children today are going through so much more than people realize from being bullied, to domestic violence in the home, to feeling like you just are not quite good enough. We need to stop being afraid to talk about this disease or feeling stigmatized by it.

Depression hides behind those smiles that you see on your loved one’s faces and it can be covered up with excuses of being tired or purely exhausted, or even in their loss of appetite or on the flip side that sudden urge to devour every item of food in sight because food doesn’t judge you. Depression does not just jump out at you and shout that it’s there and a lot of times the person struggling through it may not even realize that that is in fact what they are struggling with. So pay attention to your loved ones and don’t just downplay a developing pattern of behavior simply because you’re too busy to pay attention to what may really be going on.

I think that Robins Williams’ death shows us that even the most successful and seemingly happy people can have pain inside them that they can’t see their way past. Depression doesn’t just take place in a certain class, culture, or area. It is everywhere and can strike anyone. For those out there that envy the lifestyle of a celebrity (and I am guilty of this too), you should be reminded that you could be the person that seems to have it all, to have everything that would make almost anyone happy, but that does not mean that you are truly happy and that you don’t suffer. No one has to suffer from this alone. If you know someone who you think could be suffering from depression, don’t try and wait for the right moment to do something about it, there isn’t one. And if you are that person, don’t wait until it’s too late to talk to someone about it. Talking really does help.

 

R.I.P. Robin Williams

Robin Williams

 

 

 

 

 

 

Jimmetta Carpenter

My Write 2 Be is…

CEO/Writer/Editor

Write 2 Be Media/Write 2 Be Magazine

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What Are You Waiting For

What are you waiting for

I saw this wonderful message that was shared through Cyrus Webb’s Facebook page by Shari Alyse about waiting for things to happen in life. It made me think about how I seem to always find myself waiting for that right moment; the right moment to start my business, the right moment to publish my next book, the right moment to launch the next avenue of my business, the right moment to take my magazine into print form bi-monthly.

I realize that I could have accomplished so many things by now if I weren’t waiting for the right time to do something. We don’t get another life to live, we only have this one, and we can either spend it living or waiting for the perfect lives that we want so we can start living that perfect life. The truth is, there is no perfect life, no perfect time, no perfect situation, no perfect scenario and trying to wait until that perfect moment is just going to waste valuable time.

I’m guilty of being a perfectionist and wanting to wait until everything is aligned just right before I even start the process of trying to accomplish a task and I truly feel like that is the reason why I haven’t managed to get half of the things that I wanted done. If we want to live our best possible life then we have to do exactly that, live it. Sitting around and waiting for something to happen or for something to be right in our eyes is not living your life. It is watching everyone else around you live theirs while you’re still sitting there expecting that perfect sign to show up and let you know that you can go get started now.

What are we losing out on when we are waiting for perfect? We are missing the moment that is here now. So in your daily struggle to achieve what’s on your to-do list for this week, or this month, or this year (well the rest of this year), try not to think so much about that perfect moment that may never come. Just start where you are, right now, right in this moment!

 

Jimmetta Carpenter

My Write 2 Be is…

CEO/Writer/Editor

Write 2 Be Media/Write 2 Be Magazine

https://write-2-be.com/

http://write2bemagazine.com/

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Putting the Mind At Rest

our minds need a break

This past weekend was a very relaxing weekend for me. Even though I had some things throw me off course last Friday and it changed up my plans for the weekend, it turned out to be what I needed. Granted there are countless things that I could have been working on and getting accomplished that quite frankly I am behind on doing. There are plans and lists that could have been made in preparation for things that are to come down the line for Write 2 Be Media that I more than likely should have been working on.

However what I used up my time doing this weekend, aside from spending time with my daughter, was watching TV for the sheer enjoyment of it (and trust me when I watch TV is not always about just enjoying the show, I usually watch it with the editor’s eye and ear—scoping out plot lines that could’ve been written better, by me) and reading my book which I never seem to be able to get the time to really read and enjoy. This weekend I made time for both but mostly the reading. I got so into my book that I almost didn’t want the week to begin because I knew that it meant that it was back to writing and working on so many other things that take me away from being able to read the way that I want to.

Nevertheless, it is Monday and that means the work begins again and the hustle, while it may have gotten halted for over the past weekend, is back on. Sometimes our minds need a break and it is not a bad thing. We can’t, despite the fact that we believe we can, be turned on ALL of the time. Meaning yes we are entrepreneurs, in charge of our own brand, our own calling, our business and obviously when you are running your own business that requires more work than just going to work for someone else but you have to have those shut off moments.

You just can’t do everything all at once, all of the time. You will burn yourself out that way and then in the end you won’t be happy because you will be too tired and burnt out to truly enjoy your success. So I ask that all of you take some time every once and a while to just shut off for a moment. It doesn’t have to be for an entire weekend like I did (even though it was only supposed to be for one day) but maybe just a day or if you are really a control freak and can’t even fathom turning your business brain off for any period of time, then just a few hours.

Do something that relaxes you and that you enjoy that doesn’t require you to think about your business (at least not constantly). Do something that you haven’t been able to do for a while because you’ve been so consumed with your business. You need that time away from your business before your business becomes something that you no longer enjoy and that’s something that you definitely don’t want. You only have this one life to live to its fullest so enjoy it.

 

Jimmetta Carpenter

My Write 2 Be is…

CEO/Writer/Editor

Write 2 Be Media/Write 2 Be Magazine

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http://write2bemagazine.com/

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Success Doesn’t Come Early for Everyone…And Sometimes That’s a Good Thing

Success late in life 2

I know I’m not the only person who, growing up, didn’t look at some of these child TV and music stars and think to themselves “that could or should be me” or “I’m just as good as them if not better”. Most children will say it to themselves and ten minutes later not even give it a second thought. However, if you were an artistic child, a creative type, someone who always aimed to color outside the lines simply because the lines limited the creation that you dreamt up in your mind, then you probably really meant it when you thought it. I know that I did.

I had visions of being a singer by the time I was in my early twenties (and that was at the latest) and a New York Times Best Selling Author at least by the time I turned twenty-five. With each passing year that my dream slipped by me I grew more and more doubtful of the talents that not only I thought I had but that mostly everyone around me had seen. I would look at the lives of these child stars being played out in the media for all the world to see and think I should be traveling from this place to that place and singing on this stage and that one, doing countless television appearances for my latest novel on the NY Times list and having my pick of any place I wanted to live without any worries.

Now don’t get me wrong, I was never jealous. I am always happy when I see someone succeeding (well someone deserving anyway—hey I’m not a saint and yes I do think that some do not deserve the success they have), I just happen to have always thought I should be one of them. And even when I saw child stars blowing it, royally, getting arrested, getting hooked on drugs, having issues with alcoholism, going bankrupt and just throwing away all of their money on such frivolous things, I would think they just don’t know how to appreciate what they have.

But of course you cannot be envious of everyone’s life because you don’t know what it’s like to walk in their shoes and be under the pressure that they are and to literally be under a microscope for everyone to see your mistakes. A lot of them don’t make it, they wash out, and they give up before they even hit thirty and then the public is left to wonder “where are they now”. When I think about it in those terms, I have to wonder if maybe God knew that that life was not meant for me to have at such that young of an age.

Obviously I can’t say with an absolute certainty that I wouldn’t have been humble enough to appreciate that kind of life at that early of an age but looking back, with my childhood, I definitely think that I would have had more access to some coping mechanisms that I would have more than gladly (at that time anyway) taken advantage of. I can’t say that I would have known how to handle the life I say I wanted at that time. I was very starved for things around that young age and into my twenties because at that time I hadn’t learned how to love myself yet and I thought things were going to heal what was wrong on the inside so that is probably where my money would have went. And honestly, as suicidal as I was during that time period I can’t say that I would even still be here anymore if I had gotten the lifestyle that I thought I wanted at that time.

I wasn’t humble enough to appreciate those things at that stage of my life. I think God knew exactly what he was doing and he knew that I had to heal the inside of me first before I could truly appreciate a lifestyle that was on the next level. I think that when you get to live that kind of life at such a young age and that is all that you know, then you don’t know or appreciate what it is to be without it. Success doesn’t last for everyone and when I think of all of those that have succeeded in the ways that I plan to succeed (Russell Simmons, Oprah Winfrey, Tyler Perry, Bill Gates, etc.) then I think about the fact that none of them attained success early on. They all had a humbling life before they achieved all of the success that they have now. That humble life allows them to appreciate the things and abilities that they have even more because they know what it’s like not to have them.

I think those who attained success without any effort, without any failures are actually at a disadvantage because they don’t know how to handle having nothing. They don’t know what failure feels like to appreciate the feeling of succeeding. Oftentimes we tend to want to rush into things because we see what we want to see. The outcome that we perceive may be one that is unrealistic and possibly not even going to be what is in our best interest but our perception can be clouded. I think that we sometimes need the experience of many failures to appreciate the reward that is coming down the line. Our mistakes are what breeds the foundation for our successes and when we learn to not just embrace them but to be proud of them and celebrate them then we will be even more prepared for the successes in life that we say we want.

 

Jimmetta Carpenter

My Write 2 Be is…

CEO/Writer/Editor

Write 2 Be Media/Write 2 Be Magazine

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You Can’t Plan For Everything

Cant plan for everything

Sometimes I wonder am I missing out on something. I am a planner by nature. I like to know things ahead of time so that I can carefully plan things out around that event. I like to know just how something is going to go, or at the very least how it’s supposed to go, so that I can prepare everything that I possibly can to make sure that it in fact goes that way.

When it comes to events I plan prefer to plan things out weeks in advance so that I can not only prepare for the event but also prepare for all of the obstacles that could pop up along the way. Now there are instances, particularly in business, where being a planner can work to my benefit and help out in the long run in terms of efficiency. However, I’m not sure how much being a planner helps in the benefit of me living my best life.

I wasn’t always so thought out, so analytical, so methodical with the things that I do. I mean I’ve always been the type of person that wants to be able to know what’s around the corner before I actually reach the corner but I used to know how to be spontaneous too. It makes me wonder if the traumatic and disheartening experiences that I had my childhood turned me into someone who doesn’t really know how to live for today. In fact I think it made me more obsessive about my future. It has gotten to the point where I make lists for the lists that I need to make for the plans that haven’t even happened yet.

Now I am not saying that it is a bad thing to plan for your future. But it is another to get obsessive about it. I think that, without even realizing it, I had become obsessed about my past and making my future that much brighter that I forgot that the present is right in front of me, here, today. I am missing out on what is right in front of me trying to prepare for a tomorrow that hasn’t even got here yet.

So if you are a planner like me, please try not to get so caught up in preparing for the future that you don’t take in and enjoy the here and now. It’s one thing to plan for the future but I have to think is it planning the future out too much if you forget to be present in the moment that you’re in? Enjoy today. That doesn’t mean don’t plan, it just means don’t get stuck in the act of planning.

 

Jimmetta Carpenter

My Write 2 Be is…

CEO/Writer/Editor

Write 2 Be Media/Write 2 Be Magazine

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Will Write For…

Will write for 1

I am continually shocked at the questions that I get asked when it comes to my writing career, even more so at the assumptions that people make about it. When I say I am a writer people tend to respond “okay but what do you do for a living, as your day job” and my response is the same, I am a writer. I swear that it seems that unless you are on the New York Times Bestseller list (of which I plan to be on someday) or unless you are writing for a television show or a script for a movie that is already in production, then people don’t seem to take a person being a writer seriously. As if the people who got all of those accolades arrived there magically without putting in the hard work for little to nothing.

I am what some may call a starving artists’ except that I make sure that neither I nor my child, are never starving. Yes I might live from paycheck to paycheck, or in this instance, from assignment to assignment, but if I am going to survive (sometimes barely) that way then at least I am proud to be struggling to survive by doing something that I love and am so passionate about. Of course there are hundreds and thousands of people who do the regular job by day and then work on their dream by night and I did that for a while but I couldn’t keep that up because what ended up suffering was my dream and I just couldn’t allow that to happen.

When asked (repeatedly might I add) why would I struggle at solely being a writer, give up so many of the luxury things that I would love to do, both by myself and with my daughter, have to decline so many activities that I would love to be able to do, just to make barely enough to cover my bills and most of my necessary needs. My answer is always simple. Because it was what I was meant to do with my life, it is my calling, and I can’t devote fully to my calling and purpose if I’m devoting half of my time to someone else’s calling and purpose.

I write for many reasons. I write to say all of things that I can’t say out loud. I write to express feelings that I think no one else will care about. I write to deal with the hurt that I have felt for most of my life. I write to invent a life that I have always wanted and have not managed to attain yet. I write to cope with the harshness of this world. I write to get away from the criticism of others. I write to survive. But mostly I write for those who feel what I feel, go through what I have gone through, and can’t express what they really want to say, because I want to be a change in their lives. I want to inspire and help others heal. I want to give pieces of myself so that others can realize that it’s not just them that feel that way. I became a writer because I want to be the change in this world that I want to see and I use my words to do that.

Every time that I was working on someone else’s dream by day and had to minimize the work on my dream to the few hours a night that I got it was like dying a slow death, a little every day. Now that I don’t do that, now that my dream is my sole focus, yes I may not have things as easy as I would like to, the struggle some days might even feel too overwhelming, but I come alive more and more with the nurturing of my dream. I may not be wealthy (and not saying that wealth is not in my future) in terms of money but I am wealthy in my peace of mind, and in my heart, and in the joy that I feel from knowing that each day I am that much closer to my dream.

 

Jimmetta Carpenter

My Write 2 Be is…

CEO/Writer/Editor

Write 2 Be Media/Write 2 Be Magazine

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Not All At Once: Multitasking Does Not Always Equal Productivity

multitasking

I am one of those people that feels like they should be doing about twenty different things at one time. We all know that multitasking is something that writers have to have a handle on if they want to get an extraordinary amount of things accomplished. However, there does come a point in working on various different projects in your writing career, or any career really, where you are going to have to make one thing the focal point and everything else is going to have to fade to the background, just a little bit.

My problem is that I still want to believe that I am as excellent at multitasking as I once used to be (in my teens and twenties) when I could balance four or five different projects at the same time and devote equal time to them. Now it feels as if the more I try to balance different projects the more I end up slacking on something. I think that I am being productive to work on several things at once and try to give equal time to all but it just isn’t possible (not for me anyway).

Now I am in no way saying that multitasking is not in some ways productive. What I’m saying is thinking that you can devote an equal amount of time to all of the projects that you are working on isn’t. I think that if you are working on about three projects at a time (and I think that it should be kept to three) you have to know which project to place the priority on and let the other two be the secondary concern. That way the most important project gets accomplished.

This is a lesson that I am learning now and am going to start trying implement myself because trying to place priority on every project equally has caused me to fall behind on a project that should’ve been done already. So for all you multitasking writers out there remember that you can’t accomplish everything at once. Some things are going to have to wait so don’t end up accomplishing nothing by trying to accomplish everything.

 

Jimmetta Carpenter

My Write 2 Be is…

CEO/Writer/Editor

Write 2 Be Media/Write 2 Be Magazine

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What Determines Your Success?

Definition of success

I read an article the other day about signs that you are in fact succeeding in life even if you feel as though you are not. Before I even began to read it I was already guessing that more than half of the signs on their list were going to be things that I have not accomplished yet. I have this idea set up in my mind of what determines if someone is successful and in my eyes I am nowhere near the level of success that I had hoped I would be by now or that I think I should be by now. I have a long way to go before I get half of the things on my list accomplished. However, after reading this article I can see that maybe my evaluation of what is successful was a little off.

This article described being a success as being someone who has had growth in themselves, in their personal and professional life, in how they deal with things. It described success as having family and people that cared about them and people to lean on for support. It described being able to feel like home in whatever place you reside and raising the standards you have for yourself. It described a great deal of things that I never even thought would be someone’s idea of successful, it certainly wasn’t what I had in my mind under that label.

I’ve never been all about making money but let’s be honest, when most people think of their level of success, money is certainly a factor. It was never my absolute desire to be rich with massive amounts of money (not that I would turn it down if the opportunity presented itself) but to live a life that’s comfortable where I don’t have to worry about having enough for me and my child, yes that would be nice. When I ran down the list in the article I realized that 20 out of the 25 things on it I could say were true for myself. It made me sit back and think that maybe I’m not failing at things as badly as I often times feel that I am and maybe what I see as not having it all together, someone else sees as having it together enough for the moment I am in.

I think that sometimes we get these ideas in our heads of what the standard of success and fulfillment are and we don’t realize sometimes that the little things that we are taking for granted could be so many other people’s ideas of what success is. We think that simple is not the answer but sometimes in this life, in the moment that we are in, simple is more than enough. I think that I am going to start viewing my ideas of what having it all really means and whether or not having it all is truly someone having it all. All of what would be the important question.

 

Jimmetta Carpenter

My Write 2 Be is…

CEO/Writer/Editor

Write 2 Be Media/Write 2 Be Magazine

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Boxes on a Shelf

boxes on a shelf

I was watching a Joel Osteen Sermon this past Sunday and as always his message was something that I could really relate to and that resonated with me right at that moment. He spoke about having faith in yourself and in your abilities enough to ask God for what he already said was yours. You know we pray for the things we want out of life and finagle our way around obstacles in order to achieve them. But I think that perhaps if we were more sure about the fact that those opportunities that we want and that we see for our future are already in God’s plan and that they are already ours to grab ahold of we wouldn’t worry so much while we are praying about whether or not they are going to come to pass.

Joel used a metaphor that our opportunities are like moments that are all in boxes, lined up on shelves, in this massive warehouse in heaven, just waiting for the people whose names are on those boxes to actually ask for them. It made me wonder just how big my box of opportunities would be because I know that I am one of those people that while I am praying for my opportunities and wishing that they would come true, I am also crossing my fingers to cover all my bases.

Crossing your fingers is not a sign of true faith, and neither is worrying while you are praying. It’s so funny because I have no trouble believing in other people’s dreams and in the fact that their opportunities will come to fruition but when it comes to mine, it’s like I let all of those demons of doubt cloud what I know in my heart. I don’t want to get to the end of my journey and see my opportunities sitting in these boxes on some shelf just waiting, unclaimed, and unused.

There’s so many other things that I am unsure of in this life but my purpose, my desire to change this world for the better with my message and through writing and other media avenues, that’s not something that I am unsure of. So while you are seeking your opportunities and praying for the doors of opportunity to be opened for you are you crossing your fingers or are you surrendering in faith? It makes a difference on whether or not the right doors will be open or not.

You can’t receive all of the blessings and opportunity that God has planned for you with your fingers crossed because then you are not fully prepared to receive them. So try having absolute faith that what is meant for your life, the opportunities and changes that you have been waiting for, will come to you. And when you have that absolute faith, that unshakable belief, then ask for ALL of what it is that you want. Not some, not just enough to get by, not just one door and then you’ll worry about the next door when you get to it, ask for it ALL. Aren’t you worth EVERYTHING it is that you want?

 

Jimmetta Carpenter

My Write 2 Be is…

CEO/Writer/Editor

Write 2 Be Media/Write 2 Be Magazine

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