Tag: writing

Motivation is the Key, But By Who?

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Got motivation

I think that in some way, shape, or form, for the better part of my life I have always sought out the encouragement of others. I was always the one wanting those accolades and that reinforcement that I was on the right path and that someone else thought I was talented. I was always looking for someone to show me, or tell me, that I was good enough because for so long I was told that I wasn’t.

As I have gotten older and learned a lot more about myself and my own capabilities I have sought out other’s motivations a lot less and started to learn to begin how to motivate myself that much more. However, there are times when I get too much inside my own head and those doubts and those negative words come back to the forefront of my mind and I start to wonder am I really good enough. I hold myself back from doing a lot of things and I’m not sure if it’s that I truly don’t have all of the resources that I need to really go after these things I want or if it’s that I am afraid that those voices of people who said I wasn’t good enough will be proven right.

I will say that I am getting better with not questioning my own talent and ability so much but I know that I have a long way to go before I have absolutely no doubts in my mind at all. I keep thinking that I am finally past that point where I need someone else to make me feel like I am as good as I think I am most of the time but then it creeps up on me. I need to learn, really learn how to keep myself motivated and not looking to others to reinforce what I already know, deep down inside, to be true.

It is true what they say about motivation being the key to success and the key to leading a life without fears but motivation but who is the question. I think that we writers especially feel like we need to hear those accolades and those words of adoration in order to consider ourselves good which makes sense because writing is in fact a career in which you depend on your readers liking your work to gauge your success.

I find that with the writers who have had that level of success that they sometimes didn’t realize they were looking for, it was often said that they wrote the book that they wanted to read, they wrote for themselves more so than anyone else and that is why their work was such a success. When we do things to please ourselves and not the general public we get more results and we are a lot more satisfied. Maybe there is a lesson in that. You have to give yourself the accolades before you can expect anyone else to give them to you. So have you given yourself the accolades that you deserve lately? If not then start today!

 

Jimmetta Carpenter

My Write 2 Be is…

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My Greatness Far Exceeds Average

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Greatness within you

“Dare to be unrealistic—Being Realistic is the most commonly traveled road to mediocrity”

~Will Smith

I’ve always hated the term average, at least when it referred to me. I think of average as a term to describe someone who is content on things a certain way and never expecting anything greater than that. It is true that I am a person who has a hard time adapting to change and who likes routine but not because I am by any means average. I like to establish some consistency on my journey towards achieving the greatness I know I am destined for. I do believe that having a sense of consistent behavior enables a person to continue to pursue their goals and their dreams.  But as far as ever being content, in that regard I welcome change.

I can’t see myself ever just settling for the way someone else tells me things should be, not when I have my own high expectations for where I end up in life. I think that sometimes my expectations for myself might be far too high and that this is the reason that I get so fearful of tackling the unknown, because I am afraid I won’t live up to my own expectations. However, that isn’t a way go about achieving the great things that I am here to do.

People say that some of the things that I dream up in my mind and that I have on my list of goals are far beyond my reach and that they are a bit unrealistic. For a while I believed that they might be right. But what is being realistic really going to get me? Being realistic might maintain my comfort level and keep me in a place of being content but then that’s not what I want. As much as I hate being in a place where I feel unsure and uncomfortable, I realize that often times it is in those moments of being uncomfortable in which I somehow shine and somehow rise above what seems like impossible circumstances.

If I stay “realistic” about things then I will never go after some of these big dreams I have and I will most certainly never achieve the destiny that was meant for me to fulfill. What harm is there in being unrealistic when it comes to your dreams and what you want out of life? After all, it is your life and shouldn’t you want the most that you can get out of it.

I am not here to be average and mediocre. I am not here to satisfy someone else’s standards of living. I am not here to live up to someone else’s low expectations of me. I am here to be great, and to challenge some people’s ideas of what greatness truly is. I am here to change this world in whatever way that I can. I am here to be unrealistic and uncompromising. So the next time someone tells you that what you are aiming for is unrealistic then you tell them, that’s what you’re here for. Take care and shoot for the moon!

 

Jimmetta Carpenter

My Write 2 Be is…

CEO/Writer/Editor

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Be Good To Yourself

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Take care of self first

I have been told that I don’t take care of myself enough. I mean sure I do little things here and there every now and then for me but when the choice comes between something for me and something for my daughter I almost always will put her first, sometimes to my detriment.

Logically I know that taking care of myself better and doing things for myself on a more regular basis enables my child to have a happier mother and to get through to her that taking care of oneself is vitally important. It’s never that I intend to neglect myself but I do feel guilty whenever I choose myself over my daughter.

I think it is important to remember that creativity is fueled by being relaxed and happy and a certain feeling of being free. If we take on too much stress by trying to do everything for the people that we love in our lives, mostly our children, then we run the risk of neglecting our own feelings of happiness and that free-spirit that we creative types are known to have. How can we feel free to create when we are not letting go and allowing ourselves to relax and take care of our own needs from time to time?

I feel like my neglecting myself sometimes hinders my creativity and keeps me from tapping into the deepest level of my potential. So I think maybe I am going to start listening to that inner voice that tells me that I can put myself first sometimes, and those words of wisdom from some friends who have repeatedly told me to be better to myself. Are you taking advantage of your full potential by being kind to yourself? If not, start now. Those important people that you keep putting first, you can’t take care of them without first taking care of you.

 

Jimmetta Carpenter

My Write 2 Be is…

CEO/Writer/Editor

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What’s On the Other Side of Quitting?

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Other side of quitting 2

There is nothing that is worth having that comes easy and if it comes too easy then you better beware of the strings that come attached with that feeling of ease. I remind myself of this every time I see someone who (no offense to the less talented) seemingly does not have the talent in one pinky that I have in my whole body achieve their goal (that they just thought up two seconds before actually going for it) practically overnight.

It makes me wonder what the point is of me trying so damn hard and trying to fulfill my purpose because years of dedication still haven’t landed me in the position of the overnight success story. I think about quitting for about 5 seconds (okay sometimes a little longer than that) but then when I think about what is on the other side of me quitting I get right back at it and keep pushing through.

There is no achievement in quitting (unless you’re talking about quitting that job you hate to start the business you love). When you are sitting in the midst of that struggle, and you’re feeling that longing to reach your destination, and you feel like you just can’t wait anymore. Your patience is wearing thin. Just take a minute and think about the other side of the spectrum.

You quitting on your dreams, you essentially quitting on you, leads to a lifetime full of wonder. It leads you to a lifetime full of what ifs and watching everyone reaching their dreams and thinking that should’ve been you. It will forever put you in a place of envisioning something that you just stopped reaching for. It will mean that all of the good in the world, all of the changes that you were supposed to bring about won’t happen now because you quit.

Think about the lives that come after yours that will forever be altered because your dreams didn’t come to fruition and enable them to achieve their dreams. Think of the miracle that achieving your dreams would have brought into someone else’s life if only you had not given up. Think about the fact that victory was probably just around the corner but you just didn’t know it and you gave up right before you could see that light. It costs nothing to dream, to strive for that dream, and to put a plan of action into play in order to achieve that dream. But it could costs everything if you don’t.

You don’t want your legacy to the generation that comes after you to be that you quit and that when things got too hard you found an excuse to give up. Stand up for your dreams, and push your way towards them. Don’t give up. It’s too important for you to reach those goals. Remember it’s not just your life that it affects. It’s the lives of your children, and the generations to come after you. It’s the lives of whoever is meant to be touched by your gift, by your dream, it’s their lives that quitting will affect. When you have a dream, particularly one that services many other people, it is not just about you anymore. So the next time you feel like throwing in the towel take a moment to think about what is really on the other side of quitting.

 

Jimmetta Carpenter

My Write 2 Be is…

CEO/Writer/Editor

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What’s Wrong With Seeing the Glass as Half Full?

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Glass half full

I have been called unrealistic at times. I have been called the consummate optimist. I go through things just like anyone else. I have my own personal struggles and things that seem to be working against me. I won’t lie and say that my faith doesn’t get shaken when the whole world seems to be caving in on me and yes on occasion I have fallen into depression because things got too hard for me to really deal with. However, overall, I am a person who sees that glass half full rather then choose to see the glass half empty.

But when there are people in your life who are hell bent on seeing the despair in every single situation what do you do about that? Of course the short and easy answer would be to cut them out of your lives or keep the contact with that person limited. But it’s not so easy when that person is in your family or worse, if that person is your parent. I will never understand how people in your own family can seemingly work against everything that you are trying to accomplish and I have seen people whose families are a true piece of work. A friend of mine once told me some words of advice they received from their pastor that your kin is not always your kind.

Often times the biggest obstacles that we have when we are trying to reach our goals are the very people that we are surrounded by and when it is your family it is not always so easy to separate yourself from them. I believe that in order to be successful you are eventually going to have to remove any toxic people from your life that are not for you and what you are trying to do but the process of removal is extremely difficult when it is family, particularly your parent.

My struggles are not few and they’re not even far between but I choose to see them (most days anyway) as building blocks and stepping stones towards the brightest future that’s possible for me, brighter than even I could ever imagine. Anyone who would rather see my struggles as the beginning of a downward spiral that I am not going to be able to come back from, well they can just keep their distance from me. I don’t need that kind of negative thinking to corrupt me. I battle with my own negative thoughts that pop in my mind from time to time and I don’t need to add anyone else’s.

Where is the harm in me seeing the bright side of things? Why is it that because I don’t view every setback as a complete and total failure that I am suddenly not in touch with reality. One way or the other you have to go after your dreams, even when everything seems like it’s all going down the drain. Even if that means that you can’t include the people closest to you in on that journey. If they are not for you then they are against you. There is no in between. So if you are a glass half full type of person, you are not alone. Take care and stay optimistic!

 

Jimmetta Carpenter

My Write 2 Be is…

CEO/Writer/Editor

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That Inner Voice Is Telling Me Something Different

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Inner voice

I stumbled upon a Joel Osteen sermon the other day and he talked about listening to that little voice or that little feeling inside us that is guiding us to what we should be doing. You know that voice. The voice that tells you when something isn’t right or the one that tells you when you should be leery of someone or a certain situation. Sometimes we ignore that voice because we think we’re just being paranoid or we just don’t want to listen to is. Well often times we don’t even realize that that little voice we hear or that feeling of uneasiness that we get that can’t be explained is God guiding us to where he wants us to go.

When I watched this message it came a day or two after a friend of mine advising me that I should basically go against what I know to be right for me so that I can be comfortable for the moment and not be in so much struggle. It came from a place of love (I hope) and not wanting to see me struggle but I keep getting this subtle feeling that that advice just isn’t what is best for me.

Yes it would make things much easier right now. It would give me some solid footing while I still tackled my end goal but in all honestly I think that comfortableness that I would then settle myself into would eventually distract me from my end game. I would get comfortable with being in that ease and that steadiness and then little by little my end goal would get further and further away. It wouldn’t disappear because it is my purpose in this world but it would become faint and a bit of a whisper.

I know myself and while I hate to struggle and would love to get to that place where I can see where all my efforts have gone to, where I can see the fruits of my labor, I need the discomfort to push me the end goal. If I were comfortable in some day to day my dreams would be pushed to the side. I know that they would because it has happened before. It was almost to the point where I never even worked on my dream because I was just trying to stay in that place of being comfortable. I can’t do that again. If I did I am almost positive that my dreams would die and I refuse to let that happen.

That little voice, that little feeling, is what is telling me that the answer to my problems is not to take the easy route, but to tough it out and persevere because the reward for my perseverance is coming. Too many times I have ignored that voice, and the consequences were great. I’m not going to ignore that voice this time. I’m toughing it out and I’m going all in. What has your inner voice been telling you? Are you listening?

 

Jimmetta Carpenter

My Write 2 Be is…

CEO/Writer/Editor

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A Dream Worth Sustaining

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Dreams Wroth Sustaining

I will admit that when the going gets tough I want to get going. I don’t mean that I want to push through and hang in there either. I mean I literally just want to say I’ve had enough, I can only try so much, this must not be meant for me. However when my dream of being a writer comes into play, while I have had those feelings of giving up, my heart, my passion won’t let me.

There is nothing more rewarding in a writer’s career then to have business be doing great and everything is going the way that you want it to. The point where it is hard to be a writer, where it’s almost like you want to ask yourself what the point of it is, is when business is not going as great as you want it to be, or as great as you always envisioned it would be. You always get this picture in your mind, especially when you think of yourself as a pretty awesome writer (in which I do) that everything is going to go smoothly and fall into place just the way that it should. You imagine a booming business in which you have to turn work away because you are just so in demand. When the reality doesn’t match the vision it is difficult to deal with.

My reality, lately, has certainly not lived up to the vision that is in my mind and at times it is almost disheartening and quite frankly almost impossible to push through and keep moving forward. Nothing is going quite the way I planned but I guess if it were easy then it wouldn’t be worth it, right? This weekend I have to work out some ways to readjust my strategy and to think of other ways to turn things around. Maybe all the extra sleep I’ve caught up on this week was to allow me to spend my weekend strategizing until I find something that works. I don’t know what that will be but I know that I haven’t come this far to give up now.

No matter how many steps forward I feel I should be, one thing is for sure, I am much further along in my journey than I would be if I had given up a long time ago. I found this inspirational video done by Morris Chestnut on declaring your dreams that I think will help motivate me through my weekend. Hopefully it will help motivate you through yours as well. Take care and hustle hard!

Jimmetta Carpenter

My Write 2 Be is…

CEO/Writer/Editor

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Is a Cluttered Mind a Bad Thing?

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cluttered mind

I feel the ideas racing through my mind again. The problem is that they are not all for the same story or project. I have about 3 different books that I am currently working on (of course at different times) but I also have 2 more books in my mind in which the characters are coming to me but I am not totally sure what story they are trying to tell me yet. One is a historical fiction novel I know, set in a time period in which I have always been fascinated with, World War II. The other is something of the paranormal genre and would be totally new for me but the character keeps appearing.

My problem has never been lack of ideas for stories or that I couldn’t hear the characters as they spoke to me. It’s always been that there were just way too many ideas and way too many people speaking all at once and not from the same story. My problem has also always been that characters seem to appear when I am in the middle of telling a different character’s story and the new one, like a new baby, wants all of my attention, so I tend to leave some novels in the middle to go start a new story. That is something that I am working heavily on correcting because with that method, no one’s story gets told.

Today I have to admit that my productivity isn’t as great as it has been the last two days because all I want to do is read and research and listen to the characters and the stories that they are trying to tell me. I haven’t even played my music like I normally do while trying to get work done because I just wanted to listen to the characters. But I am trying not to feel guilty for not working on the many things I know I need to be working on right now. I can’t help that I just woke up feeling like today I just needed to do more listening and thinking, and reading.

 

Jimmetta Carpenter

My Write 2 Be is…

CEO/Writer/Editor

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There Are Some Habits That Need to Be Broken

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Some habits meant to break

This morning I woke up before my alarm clock even went off. I woke up refreshed and feeling like I had to get busy writing. Of course my morning routine must first require me to get my daughter dressed and ready for school and eating a good breakfast so those immediate desires to write had to be held off for a little while. Now yesterday I posted about 5 things that I needed to work on doing in order to make myself a better writer and I really think that acknowledging those things and putting a plan in motion to work on those things made a big difference.

Yesterday was the most productive day I have had in my writing in a very long time and it felt good. Of course another thing that wasn’t on the list but that I noted needed to be changed was my sleeping habits. I went to bed before midnight last night (which if you know me, you know is damn near a miracle) and that was really early for me. Just in that one day of going to bed at a decent hour (when I actually got tired instead of pushing past my sleepiness and working anyway) I was refreshed and woke up before a clock told me it was time to get up. I don’t feel tired (yet) and I feel energized.

Sometimes we try to resist change thinking that our old patterns will always work for us. My late night hours and all-nighters might have been what I needed to do at one point in time, a long time ago, and they may not have seemed harmful then but I was doing more harm than good trying to maintain those old habits. It is true that old habits do die hard but in order to make progress sometimes they do need to die. I am steadily working on changing some of those habits that just weren’t working for me anymore and I am intrigued to see what making those changes will do to enhance my creativity and my writing career.

Take some time today and evaluate what habits you are holding onto that you may possibly need to break. Are you holding back your own progress by holding onto those habits that you think are still working for you? Make sure that you are forming new habits to match the new levels that you are reaching in your life and in your career. Take care and don’t get stuck on those old habits!

 

Jimmetta Carpenter

My Write 2 Be is…

CEO/Writer/Editor

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5 Things to Help Me Become a Better Writer

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5 things become a better writer

I read an article the other day on Writer’s Relief detailing five things that a writer can do this week to become a better writer. It was a very interesting read and got me thinking about my own improvement that needs to be done as a writer. I believe that I am a very good writer (at least I hope so) and that I have a lot to offer the literary world but I am not naïve or bold enough in my confidence to think that there isn’t always some way that I can become even better. In fact I think that I can stand to get a lot better, if in no other area but the sheer discipline of writing.

My routine has suffered dramatically in the last few years, due to many things, one of them being overcome with deep depression. I am trying to get back to some normalcy of a routine as far as writing because I know if I don’t produce work then I might as well not call myself a writer. In reading this article, I didn’t necessarily feel that all of the points could be applied to me personally but I did write out the five things that I feel I could do to make me become better at my craft.

1)      Pledge to write at least 15 minutes every day. (Seems easy enough but harder than one might think)

2)      Divide each project to having their own separate time to be worked on instead of trying to work on several different points of each    project at the same time (Multi-tasking)

3)      Take one day a week to focus on the social media marketing/networking aspect of my writing business. (obviously marketing needs to be continuous but I need to at least devote 1 day to the planning of how that marketing needs to go)

4)      Take one day to specifically dedicate towards submitting pitches and articles and querying agents and local publications. (Again needs to be ongoing but one day to make sure to get those submissions out there)

5)      Take one day specifically for reading and researching. (Reading is so important to the craft of writing and I need to make sure I don’t neglect that)

I think these are the things that I really struggle with maintaining as a writer so I am going to be working on these things. A personal thing I want to work on that’s not on this list is a health thing that I think would work in favor of my writing career as well. I need to make sure to get the proper amount of sleep because I haven’t been and my level of energy has diminished which is affecting my rate of production.

As writers we tend to keep late hours, often times even pulling all-nighters, and sometimes don’t realize the long term damage all of those late nights can do to our energy levels, and health overall. So writers take some time this week and think of at least five things you can be doing differently to improve your craft and the amount of writing you produce. If you have any suggestions please feel free to leave a comment and let me know. Take care of yourself and take care of your craft!

 

Jimmetta Carpenter

My Write 2 Be is…

CEO/Writer/Editor

Write 2 Be Media/Write 2 Be Magazine

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