You Have to Protect Your Space

I am extremely careful about who I let into my space these days. I have gone from being a person with a wide circle of friends and associates to a person who just has a few select friends that I interact with, and they are people who understand that my space is precious to me and that the energy in my space can’t be negative. But then there are family members that can’t exactly be ignored or discarded because, well, they’re family.

It’s not easy to ignore negative criticism or when people talk down to you about your dreams or the things that you are working towards. It’s particularly hard when it comes from unexpected places like your family. This past weekend a family member made sure that they sent me a text message first thing in the morning to convey how sad they were that it didn’t seem like people were buying my book and that it didn’t look like I was getting any support from even my fellow authors on my Ko-fi page. They proceeded to tell me ways that I could bring more attention to my book and my site in general.

Mind you this person is not experienced in marketing (for the record nether am I), they have no idea what I have sold or haven’t sold book wise, and this person also refused to promote my book at all in the lead up to its release. Now I am okay with their lack of support even though they are family and to be fair they have contributed to my Ko-fi page (which is how they know I’m not getting enough support—at least in their eyes) but that doesn’t give them the right to try to poison my day. This person is the kind of person that somehow sees negative comments and unsolicited negative advice as them being helpful. They see negativity as a tool to toughen someone up and light the proverbial fire under them.

Now I have come a long way in learning how to ignore the negative self-talk that I have in my own mind and to put a positive spin on nearly everything because honestly it doesn’t help me to see the negative points about what I’m working towards. I know that there are some people that it works for but I am not one of those people. As a person who has suffered with many bouts of deep depression and still struggles not to let myself get to that place again, I don’t need someone pointing out every negative thing they can think of. Trust me, I have probably already said it to myself anyway.

Now this person also clearly has not researched the statistical data behind the fact the most authors do not sell a ton of books with their first book, maybe not even their second or third (hell Dan Brown said no one even paid attention to him until his fourth book) and I knew that going in and have had that fact in my mind. I don’t write or publish books to try and get rich (not that I would mind it lol). I write and publish because I love it, always have since I was ten years old (really six) and because I have things to say that I feel are important enough that someone else might actually want to read it and might even get something out of it.

This family member seems to always, when I’m at my most peaceful state, want to drop their words of negativity in my lap and just thinks I’m supposed to thank them for it. They don’t respect my space and they don’t seem to understand or care that the negative comments are not just hurtful and destructive, but they’re just unnecessary. I’m not going to deny that I got in my feelings about this message that morning for about an hour or two but then I let it go. I proceeded to ignore any further messages and didn’t respond to the one’s that were sent and I went back to protecting my space.  

We all have different ideas of what our happy place is. That place of peace where even if the world starts to crumble (or feels like it anyway) you still are armed with the knowledge and self-assurance that everything will be okay. It’s that space where I know that God would never give me more than I can handle and if I’m not strong enough he will be there to provide me with the strength that I need. We have to protect our spaces and keep those who wish to destroy it out, and not to be mean or nasty, but to keep ourselves sane and okay.  I hope that you are protecting your space and I wish you well in doing so.

Until next time… #BeProtective #BeMindful #BeMotivated

Jimmetta Carpenter 

Writer/Editor 

https://write-2-be.com/

http://write2bemagazine.com/

https://www.amazon.com/author/jccarpenter

http://www.facebook.com/people/Jimmetta-Carpenter/1069480310

https://www.facebook.com/Write2BeMagazine

https://www.facebook.com/AuthorJCCarpenter

https://www.write2bematters.com

https://twitter.com/jcladyluv 

https://twitter.com/write2bemag 

https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCPU35EkFSbuxgekCp4LfI5g

Side note:  I have a new Author Newsletter that I would love it if you signed up for http://www.tinyletter.com/Author_JCCarpenter

Another Side Note: If any of you would like to buy me a coffee and donate to my creative endeavors then please feel free to https://ko-fi.com/authorjccarpenter

What You Tell Yourself You Will Believe

It sounds so cliché to tell people to look on the bright side of things when things aren’t going the way that they expected them to go. I used to be one of those people who, a long time ago, would grimace at someone telling me to think of all of the good things I have to look forward to. I would look at them with the thought in my mind of ‘do you not see my world crumbling around me right now’ and just wave off their words, completely dismissing the positive vibes they were trying to send my way. I didn’t want positive vibes I wanted an answer as to why everything was crap. This was around the time when I was almost homeless, my best friend and I had had a falling out and I felt like I had no one who understood my pain.

But then I started working on some inner healing that was so long overdo. I started working on my spiritual journey and got back into going to church. I got back into not just saying that I believe God would never give me more than I can handle, but actually knowing down in my soul that those words were true. I started really listening to the things that God was telling me, the direction he wants me to go in, and I started really trusting that regardless of whatever happens, good or bad, God has got me and He will never leave me. I started learning how to love and trust myself and my own instincts (which were really whispers from God of what I already knew I should be doing and just didn’t trust it enough) again.

Then I became one of those people that I once used to grimace at. I started being able to find the positive aspects of everything. Even the most horrible things that happened I would strive to find the one positive aspect in it. There really is power in positive thinking. What’s even more amazing is that there is peace in thinking positive as well. Now I just feel so much peace inside and it doesn’t mean that everything is going well, it just means that I trust that it will all work out somehow in the way that it’s supposed to. I’m not saying I don’t still have some days where that depression starts to try and sneak in and rest within my spirit but I think I do a far better job now of keeping it at bay.  

I saw a woman on the news this morning that was talking about the aftermath of Hurricane Ida and talking about how she has pretty much lost everything. The roof in her family’s home had holes in three places, there was mold now in her home so she had no choice but to throw everything that had been soaked through out, and they still have no power so no AC in a hundred plus degree heat. And she was smiling. She said that what she was concerned about now was feeding the neighbors around her. She said she may not be able to provide anyone with heat but she can make sure that they are fed. What a remarkable outlook on such a tragic situation. Her thing was, at least she was still here and she had to look at the positive things because what other choice was there.

Could we dwell on everything that goes wrong and focus on all of the bad crap that happens to us or others around us? Sure we could. But does that actually help change any of those things? Does it make you feel any better? So why not choose the positive things that are still present around you to focus on? Even if you can only find one positive thing in that crappy moment that you are in, rather than zero in on what is wrong, chose that one good thing instead.  I promise you that you will feel better if you just keep your mind leaning towards the positive. As long as you are still here, things can always turn around.

Until next time… #BePositive #BeMindful #BeBlessed

Jimmetta Carpenter 

Writer/Editor 

https://write-2-be.com/

http://write2bemagazine.com/

https://www.amazon.com/author/jccarpenter

http://www.facebook.com/people/Jimmetta-Carpenter/1069480310

https://www.facebook.com/Write2BeMagazine

https://www.facebook.com/AuthorJCCarpenter

https://www.write2bematters.com

https://twitter.com/jcladyluv 

https://twitter.com/write2bemag 

https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCPU35EkFSbuxgekCp4LfI5g

Side note:  I have a new Author Newsletter that I would love it if you signed up for http://www.tinyletter.com/Author_JCCarpenter

Another Side Note: If any of you would like to buy me a coffee and donate to my creative endeavors then please feel free to https://ko-fi.com/authorjccarpenter

You Are Important Just As You Are

Every now and then I start to think about what I need to change in order to get things to move in the right direction. I see someone else doing things in an extraordinary way and it seems to work so well for them and I wonder should I be doing what they’re doing and would it work for me. But doing something that isn’t me and that doesn’t even fit my brand or who I am as a person is not really the message I want to put out there.

I have gotten to a place in my life where I have finally become okay with not fitting into someone else’s mold of who they think I should be or what they think I should do. When I assess whether I should try something that someone else is doing, I try to think is it authentic to who I am. Obviously there are lessons in the actions of others who have already gotten to where you are trying to go. I think sometimes it is okay to emulate the methods of successful people because clearly we learn by watching others as they go through their trial and error. However, you have to know when you are just trying to gain knowledge and when you are trying to be someone other than yourself.

I spent my twenties (mostly anyway) trying to fit everyone else’s idea of me and what they thought I should do and in my thirties I finally got it. It took me so long to understand and stop trying to fit in where I don’t think I ever belonged, and trying to be anyone other than who I really was, because I didn’t get that I was important just as I am.

There’s a quote by Michelle Obama that I want to leave you with that reads “You don’t have to be somebody different to be important. You’re important in your own right.” Know that whatever you do on your journey in life it’s okay to soak up the information and put others methods into practice that will help improve you and your life. Don’t try to fit into someone else’s mold, and remember that you are enough all on your own.

Until next time… #BeAuthentic #BeMindful #BeBold

Jimmetta Carpenter 

Writer/Editor 

https://write-2-be.com/

http://write2bemagazine.com/

https://www.amazon.com/author/jccarpenter

http://www.facebook.com/people/Jimmetta-Carpenter/1069480310

https://www.facebook.com/Write2BeMagazine

https://www.facebook.com/AuthorJCCarpenter

https://www.write2bematters.com

https://twitter.com/jcladyluv 

https://twitter.com/write2bemag 

https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCPU35EkFSbuxgekCp4LfI5g

Side note:  I have a new Author Newsletter that I would love it if you signed up for http://www.tinyletter.com/Author_JCCarpenter

Another Side Note: If any of you would like to buy me a coffee and donate to my creative endeavors then please feel free to https://ko-fi.com/authorjccarpenter

It’s Just a Bend in the Road

Being an entrepreneur has its ups and downs and in the beginning it tends to come with a lot more downs than ups. Unless you are extremely lucky or just know all of the right people, you will more than likely be working at trying to get your name out there and get to that place of true financial comfort in your entrepreneurial status for quite some time. 

I think when I decided that I wanted to own my own business and pursue creative entrepreneurship I was naïve in thinking that just a year or two would be the magic number. The truth is, there is no magic number. I mean I’ve been at this for more years than I care to admit and honestly I’m still not there yet. I will say that I’ve come a very long way and in the past year and a half I’ve come even further than I imagined and that was because I did something that wasn’t comfortable for me.

I started a YouTube channel (link is below) and when I did I had no idea just how much it would change things, and I don’t really mean in terms of money (because I’m not yet making anything with that channel- yet), but in terms of pushing me past my comfort zone. It’s enabling me to reach people I might not ordinarily be able to reach, gaining a writing support system that I didn’t realize I needed, and making me more comfortable speaking on camera which will go far for certain future endeavors I have planned down the road. The lessons I have learned and the community that I have gained in having this channel is priceless.

Striking out on your own is hard. It’s oftentimes a thankless effort to have a creative business because quite frankly, a lot of people don’t treat creative businesses the same as they do other non creative businesses. You will have days where your hope starts to fade and your resolve to hang in there weakens. You’re wondering what it’s all for if it hasn’t happened yet. Don’t give up.

Your journey will not be obstacle free and this is definitely not for the faint of heart. Keep in mind that the road to your destination is full of curves and if you’re feeling stuck right now it’s not because it’s over, but rather you’ve hit a bend in the road. You can’t see to the other side right now but I promise you, if you keep going beautiful things are coming just around the bend.

Until next time… #BePatient #BeHopeful #BePersistent 

Jimmetta Carpenter 

Writer/Editor 

https://write-2-be.com/

http://write2bemagazine.com/

https://www.amazon.com/author/jccarpenter

http://www.facebook.com/people/Jimmetta-Carpenter/1069480310

https://www.facebook.com/Write2BeMagazine

https://www.facebook.com/AuthorJCCarpenter

https://www.write2bematters.com

https://twitter.com/jcladyluv 

https://twitter.com/write2bemag 

https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCPU35EkFSbuxgekCp4LfI5g

Side note:  I have a new Author Newsletter that I would love it if you signed up for http://www.tinyletter.com/Author_JCCarpenter

Another Side Note: If any of you would like to buy me a coffee and donate to my creative endeavors then please feel free to https://ko-fi.com/authorjccarpenter

Be Proud Of You Even If No One Else Is

It’s always both nerve wracking and exciting when you do something big or just something that you’ve been waiting for. I felt that way when I launched my online store (www.write2bematters.com) because I had been working on that idea, which started out just being in my brain formulating, for nearly two years and I was nervous about whether anyone would even like it.  This week, however, I am re-releasing my novel, The Diary: Succession of Lies, and I’m extremely anxious because while I wear many hats and have many creative endeavors that I want to explore, writing has been my number one passion since I was six years old.

It was already not done right the first time it was published because frankly the small publisher didn’t do nearly all of what I thought they would do and I knew next to nothing about marketing or publicity and at the time social media was still new and I didn’t really want any parts of it. Needless to say it wasn’t shopped well and I didn’t know how to shop it to the point that it needed to be. Honestly I had no business signing that contract and I wasn’t strong enough then to even feel comfortable enough to voice what I expected and what I wanted and felt I wasn’t getting.

I’ve come a long way since then and because it was a well received novel to those that it did reach, and because I have learned a lot (not as much as I could but way more than I knew before) about putting myself out there and navigating some manner of marketing I decided that it deserved a real shot. I wanted this book to be a part of my catalog of work to come and I wanted it to be my first novel for a lot of reasons that I won’t get into at the moment. 

I am praying this book does everything I want it to do but even if it doesn’t I believe I’m more proud of this round of publishing it because I feel so sure and confident about my readiness to do it. It doesn’t make me any less anxious though lol. So Friday my book baby will be out in the world, and I hope that people love it and that they will support me but even if they don’t, I’m proud of myself. As creative individuals remember that you always have to make sure that you are proud of what you do, even if no one else is.

Until next time… #BeConfident #BeEmpowered #BeProud

Jimmetta Carpenter 

Writer/Editor 

https://write-2-be.com/

http://write2bemagazine.com/

http://www.facebook.com/people/Jimmetta-Carpenter/1069480310

https://www.facebook.com/Write2BeMagazine

https://www.facebook.com/AuthorJCCarpenter

https://twitter.com/jcladyluv 

https://twitter.com/write2bemag 

https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCPU35EkFSbuxgekCp4LfI5g

Side note:  I have a new Author Newsletter that I would love it if you signed up for http://www.tinyletter.com/Author_JCCarpenter

Another Side Note: If any of you would like to buy me a coffee and donate to my creative endeavors then please feel free to https://ko-fi.com/authorjccarpenter

We Learn From the Mistakes We Own Up To

There have been quite a few stories in the news over the past week regarding the issue of accountability. Some people who no longer have to be held accountable for their actions, and some who are being held accountable but the overwhelming public thinks they should not have to face any accountability at all.

Now I am someone who tries to the best of their ability to follow the rules and I’m not perfect so I’m not going to sit here and say that I’ve never broken any rules. However, those times that I have broken the rules I had to deal with the consequences of my actions. It is because of those times, and those consequences that I have become stricter about trying to hold myself to following the rules for any given situation, because I understand that there are consequences that will follow if I don’t.

I think that if we let people off the hook for breaking the rules we only send them the signal that it’s okay to continue breaking any rules they want and then they never learn anything from the experience. We don’t always like the rules set by other people and their organizations but just because we may not like them or agree with them doesn’t make any one person more special than the next who has to follow them.

People make mistakes because they are human and obviously we’re never going to get everything right. The thing about making mistakes is that if we don’t face them, own up to them, and be forced to deal with the consequences from making those mistakes then we don’t learn from them and we don’t grow. Life is about a series of experiences and choices and about learning that our actions, whatever they may be, good or bad, have consequences.

Until next time… #BeAccountable #BePersistent #BeBrave

Jimmetta Carpenter 

Writer/Editor 

https://write-2-be.com/

http://write2bemagazine.com/

http://www.facebook.com/people/Jimmetta-Carpenter/1069480310

https://www.facebook.com/Write2BeMagazine

https://www.facebook.com/AuthorJCCarpenter

https://twitter.com/jcladyluv 

https://twitter.com/write2bemag 

https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCPU35EkFSbuxgekCp4LfI5g

Side note:  I have a new Author Newsletter that I would love it if you signed up for http://www.tinyletter.com/Author_JCCarpenter

And if any of you would like to buy me a coffee and donate to my creative endeavors then please feel free to https://ko-fi.com/authorjccarpenter

Be Grateful Standing In Your Present

Photo Credit: Risa Rodil |www.risarodil.com

“You can’t wait until life isn’t hard anymore before you decide to be happy.”

~Nightbirde 

The news has been really heavy lately and it feels like if there isn’t one thing then it’s another and you might think that it would make me less optimistic and less hopeful. You would be wrong. I used to think that it was a load of crap when people said that if you get your spiritual walk in life on track then everything else will fall into place. I just didn’t think that it could be as simple as being consistent with my daily devotionals and daily spiritual motivation along with my long and extended daily talks with God plus a healthy dose of manifesting the life I want. I, as usual, found that I was wrong.

In a time where things are definitely not certain and the world is at its highest level of chaos that I’ve seen since probably 9-11, I have to say that I have never felt more at peace in my life. And it’s not that I have anything figured out (because I assure you that I do not) and it’s not that I have become suddenly successful and have stepped into complete financial security either (because that definitely has not happened yet). I can only say that my peace comes from knowing that God already has everything worked out for me in whatever way he needs for it to happen in order for me to fulfill the purpose I am here to fulfill. 

I heard the above quote from a young lady who auditioned for America’s Got Talent and who is currently suffering with a terminal cancer in which she was told that she only has a 2% chance of survival and her attitude about it was that “hey it’s not 0% and I’m going to live while I can” and I loved her outlook.  She basically pointed out that you can’t just keep waiting for the day things get better because they might not and then what.

It’s the same when you are working towards accomplishing your dreams the way I have been aggressively doing so (and sometimes not as aggressive as necessary) for what feels like forever now. There are good days when I seem right on the cusp of something big about to happen and then other days where I am acutely aware of how far away my goals truly are. It doesn’t matter how many bad days I have, I can’t just give up and stop now. I can’t just throw in the towel on my dreams because of the hard days that I have along the journey.

The way I see it (or at least how I see it now that I have grown and matured lol) is that the hard days are going to be so worth it when I reach the actual goal. And even then, I’m just going to create another goal and extend the journey. As long as you are given another day to breathe on this earth you have to be grateful for each day that you get and be happy no matter how hard the day was because you are here, and you are present, and God is giving you another chance each day he wakes you up. Don’t squander the time you have here by dwelling on how hard the day may be. Be thankful that you are alive to get through the tough days so that you can better enjoy the good ones that are surely to come.

Until next time…#BeBold #BePresent #BeGrateful

Jimmetta Carpenter 

Writer/Editor 

https://write-2-be.com/

http://write2bemagazine.com/

http://www.facebook.com/people/Jimmetta-Carpenter/1069480310

https://www.facebook.com/Write2BeMagazine

https://www.facebook.com/AuthorJCCarpenter

https://twitter.com/jcladyluv 

https://twitter.com/write2bemag 

https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCPU35EkFSbuxgekCp4LfI5g

Side note:  I have a new Author Newsletter that I would love it if you signed up for http://www.tinyletter.com/Author_JCCarpenter

And if any of you would like to buy me a coffee and donate to my creative endeavors then please feel free to https://ko-fi.com/authorjccarpenter

Laying the Groundwork

So I’m about to have another birthday on Thursday and I’ll be turning 41 and thinking about really crossing further into the forties has me thinking about whether or not I’m satisfied with the direction that my life is going. I mean of course I had plans when I was younger of what my forty year old self would be doing in life and where I would be in my career and on the ladder of success.

However, when I was younger I was naïve to the reality of adulthood and what having all of those things that I want would take in terms of effort and sheer willpower after getting repeatedly knocked down and having to pry myself off the ground to get back up and keep pushing forward. Honestly if you had asked me when I was younger if I thought I had the tenacity and strength to have to keep pushing through all of the obstacles that have been thrown at me I would have said no, I can’t do it, I’m just not that strong. I’m glad to say that I would have been wrong because you never truly know how strong you are until you have to be.

So what have I learned in these 41 years of living? I suppose I would say the biggest thing that I’ve learned about myself, and that I continue to learn as I move forward in my career goals, is that I have never lost my passion for what it is I know I am supposed to do with my life. Even though I’m not sure how I knew writing was my purpose back when I was just six years old (at six I wouldn’t have known anything about the use of the word purpose lol) I have never wavered from that dream.  Sure I thought I would be where I desired to be by now but again, that was the naiveté of a child dreaming that just assumed if you’re talented and wanted it bad enough it would happen easily.

I know a lot of people who think writing is nothing special and that it’s an easy thing to do. I often get those that think I don’t do anything at all because I’m “just a writer” they say and that’s “not that hard to do” which is infuriating because this is not a career for the feint of heart.  I have literally dedicated my entire life to this craft and it is who I am, not just what I do. At 41 I’m not on any New York Time’s Bestsellers list (as I hoped I would be at this point) and frankly I am just now in the process of re-releasing my first novel and a couple of poetry books this year but I have put in years of article writing and blogging here on this blog, creating a newsletter first, and then magazine, to make sure that I do my part to highlight other authors to the best of my ability, and now I even have a YouTube channel in which I talk about my writing life and that is not nothing.

A couple of years ago, in the mindset I was in then, I would have been sulking and further depressed about where I wasn’t in my life, only focused on what I haven’t been able to accomplish.  Today, because I have been working on my spiritual journey, my mindset has drastically shifted to where I don’t see it quite that way anymore. I see all that I have been able to accomplish as me laying the groundwork for all of the victorious things that I know are to come. I have been getting prepared for my dreams to come to fruition and I think I needed that preparation.

Just because things don’t happen on the timetable that we want them to, doesn’t mean they won’t happen. In fact it may be better for them not to happen when we want them because I find that oftentimes when we think we are ready for things, more than likely we aren’t ready at all. If you haven’t gotten to where you want in life just yet, don’t let that get you down. Just think of it as you laying the groundwork for all that is to come and keep pushing, keep working, and you will get there. God wouldn’t give you the vision and the dream if He hadn’t prepared a way for you to have it when He’s ready for you to.

Until next time #BePatient #BePersistent #BeReady

 

Jimmetta Carpenter 

Writer/Editor 

https://write-2-be.com/

http://write2bemagazine.com/

http://www.facebook.com/people/Jimmetta-Carpenter/1069480310

https://www.facebook.com/Write2BeMagazine

https://www.facebook.com/AuthorJCCarpenter

https://twitter.com/jcladyluv 

https://twitter.com/write2bemag 

https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCPU35EkFSbuxgekCp4LfI5g

 

Side note:  I have a new Author Newsletter that I would love it if you signed up for http://www.tinyletter.com/Author_JCCarpenter

 

And if any of you would like to buy me a coffee and donate to my creative endeavors then please feel free to https://ko-fi.com/authorjccarpenter

Pushing the Boundaries

So I did it! I did my first live stream this past weekend and I’m going to be honest, I did not hit it out of the park. I wasn’t necessarily planning to hit a home run here because if you know anything about me then you know I am terrified when it comes to doing something new, in particular something new that terrifies me in the first place. I’m never eager to fail at anything but I have been doing some growing these past few years, both spiritually and mentally, so I get that in order to succeed at anything there are going to be a few failures along the way because perfect is not a realistic goal. Could it have gone better? Yes! Do I regret doing it even though I feel I could’ve done much better? No! Just in the way that I felt terrified when I started my YouTube channel about being on camera to begin with but then gradually adapted to it and even liking it.

Sometimes doing things that we don’t necessarily want to do can end up being the best thing that we’ve ever done and if we just focused on the fact that it scares us then we would never much of anything.  It’s scary to grow past the box that you have learned to maneuver yourself in. You get accustomed to things being just the way you like them and in a way that doesn’t require you to have to learn anything new or do something you’re not used to doing and in my case, someone who has extreme anxiety and OCD and a nearly paralyzing fear of change, it can feel pretty good to know what to expect out of every day.  But then you never end up growing if it stays that way and to succeed in life with anything there has to be growth.

It’s something that I’m learning along this journey and something that definitely makes me feel uncomfortable. I suppose we all have two choices in the ladder of success. We can hold on to the rung that we’re on with the knowledge that as long as we hold on tight we won’t fall, we’ll stay right where we are. Or, we can have faith that if you just carefully move forward and grab one rung at a time, even knowing that there is a possibility of falling, that God will always be your safety net, thus remaining cautious yet still in motion. 

We can’t hold on at the same level forever, not if we ever expect to get anywhere. Success lies in the ability to reach for the next rung of the ladder and having faith that you won’t fall and if you do that God will be there to catch you and get you back on track. We can’t live in our comfort zones forever, and I’m not sure we should really want to even if we could.

Until next time… #BeBold #BeCourageous #BeBrave

 

Jimmetta Carpenter 

Writer/Editor 

https://write-2-be.com/

http://write2bemagazine.com/

http://www.facebook.com/people/Jimmetta-Carpenter/1069480310

https://www.facebook.com/Write2BeMagazine

https://www.facebook.com/AuthorJCCarpenter

https://twitter.com/jcladyluv 

https://twitter.com/write2bemag 

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The Patches in Our Quilts

I was listening to an old Tyler Perry acceptance speech that talked about his grandmother’s quilt and how at first he was ashamed of the quilt his grandmother had left him because it wasn’t appealing to the eye. He spoke about learning how to eventually appreciate the patches in his grandmother’s quilt because he had to come to realize that every patch that went into making the quilt she left him told a story of an area in her life and her quilt was the overall story of her life and she was leaving that to him. Initially he hadn’t even understood the enormity of the legacy she had left him. It made me think about whether or not we always understand the value of our patches.

I have often at different points in my life of course, felt shame for some tough lessons I had to learn the hard way. I’ve felt regret for opportunities that I have been too afraid to take and for decisions that I couldn’t take back.  Now that I have just crossed into my forties and I have spent the last few years growing both spiritually and mentally, I have come to believe that those moments in my life that I used to want to take back have made me who I am, for better or for worse.

While I would have loved not to have learned some of the lessons I’ve learned the hard way I wonder if I would have ever learned them otherwise.  Would I have ever been pushed forward without the hardships that I’ve had? If I hadn’t been knocked down so many times would I have developed the tenacity and persistence to be able to keep getting back up and pushing harder for what I want?

All of our experiences in life give us something to take into the next phase of our journeys’. They prepare us and toughen us up for what will undoubtedly be a bumpy road to the success you’re striving for.  The failures that you’ve had in life are not what you should dwell on because those failures mean that you actually tried. One thing is for certain and that is that you can’t succeed at anything without ever having tried. 

My mistakes are what have strengthened me and they are patches in my life’s quilt. I am very proud to sew them together and see just how far I’ve come even if I still have quite a ways to go.  I hope to be able to pass the quilt of my life down to my daughter so that she can then be able to know my story. Perhaps she will add her own patches to the quilt to pass down to her kids in the future.  Everyone needs to be proud of the patches that they have in their quilts and not just proud but understand the value in every single patch.

Until next time… #BeBold #BeFearless #BeGateful

Jimmetta Carpenter 

Writer/Editor 

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