I was thinking the other day about how much energy it takes to pretend everything is going okay. Often times when things have hit a rough patch and start to crumble we want to put on a brave face for the rest of the world and we don’t want to really portray to those close to us that we don’t have it all together. We sugarcoat things sometimes and put a happy infliction in our voices to sound upbeat even when all we really want to do is scream out in frustration from the way that things are in reality falling apart.
I told my friend the other day that this year I want to really work on not pretending with people, at least those closest to me. That doesn’t mean I want to bog them down with the issues that I may be having but just that I don’t want to place the enormous amount of energy it takes to smile when I want to cry, or to come up with a story about how good things are going when in reality they are far from being good. I’m realizing that it is okay to not be okay.
Sometimes we have to let things fall apart, acknowledge that things need to change, and let the façade of perfection go in order to really build things back up again so that we can get things back on track. I think that we worry that people will judge us or think differently of us if we don’t have all of our ducks in a row and if we seem to show cracks in our exterior walls but the real question is should we really be worried about what everyone else thinks about us. If we are putting on a show for everyone else and acting as if nothing is wrong then are the people we are putting on the show for actually getting to see and know the “REAL” us?
I believe that if we start focusing our energy on being authentic and being truthful about our reality then not only will it be healing for us but perhaps it could help others as well who feel like they have to pretend for the rest of the world. Of course that doesn’t mean that you should go around broadcasting all of your issues to anyone who will listen but we can stop putting up the pretense that things are good when they’re not. We can be honest and say that while things can be better that you are blessed and that you will get through it because it takes so much energy to pretend to be okay. Let’s agree that in 2020 we will be honest, not just with the people around us but also with ourselves. Let’s give our energy to building things back up again and not on pretending that we’re not really falling apart! Until next time… #BeHonest #BeAuthentic #BeVulnerable
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