Tag: dreams

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A Reminder of the Dream, In Case You Forgot

January 17, 2022 jcladyluv

Today we remember the dream that Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. had all of those years ago when he gave that I Have a Dream speech. While I don’t normally repost old blog posts, I couldn’t get past the fact that what I wrote last year to commemorate this day STILL applies, even more so, today. I want to leave you with those same words today and remind you that we are not finished yet, not until we can see his vision for the dream that he had all the way through. We cannot give up on a fight in which he literally gave his life for. I hope that something in this post inspires you today to keep striving towards the goal of making his dream of a better and more equal America come true.

Is There Still Hope for The Dream?

I wasn’t sure what I wanted to say today but I knew that Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. was going to be the subject of this post. So, I went to pull up the full “I have a Dream” speech on YouTube (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=smEqnnklfYs) because it’s been a long time since I’ve heard the speech in its entirety. As I sat there listening, it was mind blowing just how relevant and powerful his words still are to this very day.

Now I don’t know if that is telling to the staying power of his words or to the sadness that they still ring true. In essence, we may have come far but within these last few years we seemed to have taken several steps backwards. I guess you would have to listen for yourself to determine which one it is for you. For me it’s a bit of both. Yes of course those words he spoke that day still matter, even more so now, because before the last four years we were starting to see some of those dreams manifested and brought to fruition. Or were we?

We thought that we had started to see some change with President Obama because he was someone who truly took those words of Dr. King’s to heart and he embodied them and strived, with much opposition, to make those dreams a reality. We thought we had come farther, but within the last four years we have seen certain strides that were taken being walked back immensely. It makes you wonder, had we really even made any change? Was it all surface accomplishments but underneath, the roots, were still very present and had not yet been weeded out enough to allow sustainable growth?

That day on August 28^th of 1963, Dr. King said that America needed to pull itself out of the quicksand of racial injustice in where people of color lived on an island of poverty amongst a vast ocean of material prosperity. He points out that America had not kept its promise to us and that it was in for a rude awakening if it expected things to go back to business as usual. I think that he would be disheartened to see all of his words continually quoted by people who clearly have no deep understanding of what they actually mean because if they did then they would see that we only seek “the riches of freedom and the security of justice.”

I think if he were still alive that he would find himself having to repeat those same words he spoke to those gathered around the Lincoln Memorial that day. I think he would feel obligated to remind the entitled groups of people who think the rules don’t apply to them that equality is not wrong, it is not unreasonable, and it is not unattainable.

I think he would also turn to those who have grown weary and tired, and yes complacent amongst those who would like to revert back to a time that our ancestors struggled so hard to lead us out of and tell them to keep moving forward. I think he would tell them that we cannot be satisfied with the status quo, and we most certainly cannot leave this country in the fragmented state that we find ourselves in today. I think that he would remind people who are angry because we’re still explaining that we just want equality that they have to continue to strive for freedom but not by “drinking from a cup of bitterness and hatred”.

The song that plays at the very beginning of the recording of his speech is “We Shall Overcome” and as I listened to the words in that song, and replayed the words of his speech, I have to say that even in the current state of this country, I still have hope that we will be okay. I still think that Dr. King’s Dream is going to come true, someday, but we can’t give up, and we have to keep moving forward, until we are all Free At Last.

Until next time… #BeFearless #BeBrave #BeRelentless

Jimmetta Carpenter

Writer/Editor

http://www.facebook.com/people/Jimmetta-Carpenter/1069480310

https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCPU35EkFSbuxgekCp4LfI5g

Plans Change and We Must Adapt

January 10, 2022 jcladyluv

Okay so I had every intention of starting the year off strong last week. That was the plan anyway. However, that is not how things went. I think that it is becoming a tradition with me that the year starts off with nothing but good intentions but almost always the slowest ever start. I was not feeling well last week at all. It was a really bad pain week (I have chronic pain- some days are good and some, not so good) and I had a cold that I thought (in a panic) could have possibly been COVID for a few days (thankfully it wasn’t) so the combination of being sick with a cold and in a lot of pain made for a disaster of a start to the New Year.

Nevertheless, I still managed to complete a few of my scheduled tasks last week and am trying not to kick myself too much for the things that I didn’t get accomplished. There’s nothing more that makes me feel inadequate then when I plan things to go a certain way and they don’t even come close. Logically I know that almost nothing ever goes according to the way we plan them but with so many things that are out of our control, our plans are essentially one of the few things that we can actually feel like we have some sense of control over.

I think a part of what makes it so hard to learn from lessons of our past is the fact that we keep repeating the same mistakes and the same misguided ways of thinking. We instinctively know the things that we shouldn’t do and that the plans that we make for ourselves could fall by the wayside at any moment because, well God’s plans and our plans might not line up with one another, and yet we continue to plan and to make the same misguided mistakes anyway.

I don’t necessarily think it’s a bad thing, mind you. After all, we do need a plan for things (even in the Bible God had his chosen few make plans). We just have to make sure that we are not so dead set on OUR plan that we somehow miss the instructions that God gives us a long the way for how HE wants us to change the plan.

There are going to be curves in the road and almost certainly some sharp turns that come out of the blue and we have to be ready, and we have to be prepared to make the right decision on the which direction to go. And since we can’t always count on there being a U-turn in the road for us to course correct, the best way is to take things a little slower and a little steadier so that we don’t miss those curves and those sharp turns. Don’t be so upset at your plan not coming to fruition that you miss the joy of knowing that God’s plan is still working.

Until next time…#BeVigilant #BePatient #BeinFaith

Jimmetta Carpenter

Writer/Editor

http://www.facebook.com/people/Jimmetta-Carpenter/1069480310

https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCPU35EkFSbuxgekCp4LfI5g

Side note: I have a new Author Newsletter that I would love it if you signed up for http://www.tinyletter.com/Author_JCCarpenter

Another Side Note: If any of you would like to buy me a coffee and donate to my creative endeavors then please feel free to https://ko-fi.com/authorjccarpenter

Resetting Boundaries and Growing Past Your Comfort Zone in the New Year

January 3, 2022 jcladyluv

It’s a brand New Year and with any luck it will be far better than the last two years. Now I’m not going to say that nothing good happened last year because after all, I published two books, and I started my online store. Let’s just say that I had a place where I would be in mind for the end of 2021 and to say that I was far from that desired goal would be an understatement. But I digress.

This is not going to be a negative post (I know it did sound kind of negative but bear with me) but in order to know the things that we need to do to get further along the path to achieving our goals we have to first assess and evaluate where we may have gone wrong in the first place. So, I’m just being reflective of the fact that I could have done a bit more to get to my goal and noticing where I need to improve.

While we know that we can never be perfect in the things that we do (because there’s just no such thing) we can always consistently strive to be ever changing and evolve to different methods and ways of thinking that will work better for us. We don’t get anywhere if we don’t admit, at least to ourselves, that we have to be willing to get out of those comfort zones that we have settled into.

We have to set boundaries for ourselves obviously, but we have to be willing to push those boundaries as well when we see that it’s time to grow forward. Otherwise, we will stay stagnant, and our success will inevitably be limited to the parameters that we ourselves set. So, this year make sure that you are pushing forward instead of just spinning on a never-ending wheel that lands you back in the same place in which you started.

Until next time… #BeBold #BeFearless #BePersistent

Jimmetta Carpenter

Writer/Editor

http://www.facebook.com/people/Jimmetta-Carpenter/1069480310

https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCPU35EkFSbuxgekCp4LfI5g

Side note: I have a new Author Newsletter that I would love it if you signed up for http://www.tinyletter.com/Author_JCCarpenter

Another Side Note: If any of you would like to buy me a coffee and donate to my creative endeavors then please feel free to https://ko-fi.com/authorjccarpenter

Your Attitude is Everything

November 29, 2021 jcladyluv

I’ve been in a bit of a funk since last week. I realized that I am nearing the stage of burn out and that I will most likely be taking a break from this blog and my YouTube channel in the month of December. I do have prerecorded videos that will be posted throughout December on YouTube channel so I will still technically be a presence over there. This will likely be my last blog post for this year (unless I get a great spark of inspiration for something to tell you lol) because I need to refill the creative well. It is important, as a creative, to not let yourself burn out entirely before realizing that you need to take a step back.

But my moment that I was having last week was also about something else. I was feeling like all of my efforts that I put into my writing career were pointless. I felt like all of the efforts were not bearing any fruit, or not enough fruit anyway if we’re talking in terms of finances. Even up until this morning I was just feeling so down about things. Then I was listening to something where the person being interviewed said that your attitude affects how you see things. It’s not like I didn’t already know this. I just needed a bit of a reminder and that reminder came right on time this morning.

I know that whatever happens, good or bad, I am blessed just to be given another chance each day God wakes me up in the morning. It is not over until it is REALLY over, meaning when there is no breathe left in my body. So just because I am not seeing things going in the direction I want them to go in right now doesn’t mean that it’s going to stay that way. But things surely can’t change course if I were to just have an attitude of giving up.

We accomplish nothing when we throw in the towel and give away. The only thing that would ensure is that all of the progress that we have made up to that point would truly be wasted and bear no fruit at all. It gets hard sometimes when you dream big but if it were easy then it would be a vision given to everyone and not just you. Our dreams and our visions are worth fighting to make them happen, no matter what it takes.

So keep that attitude of determination and drive. Hold on to that as you push through the dark moments where that little voice in your head is telling you that it’s pointless. Your attitude will be what carries you through and you will get there. Just don’t quit!

Until next time… #BeAmbitious #BeBold #BeGrateful

Jimmetta Carpenter

Writer/Editor

http://www.facebook.com/people/Jimmetta-Carpenter/1069480310

https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCPU35EkFSbuxgekCp4LfI5g

Side note: I have a new Author Newsletter that I would love it if you signed up for http://www.tinyletter.com/Author_JCCarpenter

Another Side Note: If any of you would like to buy me a coffee and donate to my creative endeavors then please feel free to https://ko-fi.com/authorjccarpenter

Is Fear Something We Ever Get Over Or Just Something We Learn To Manage?

November 15, 2021 jcladyluv

There are a lot of things that I most likely could have accomplished by now if it weren’t for the fear that rises up whenever I am getting ready to take that metaphorical leap of faith. Sometimes I manage to nudge myself off of that ledge and just go for it anyway. More often than those times where I take the risk, are the ones in which I am frozen, paralyzed with fear. I wish there was a way to explain the anxiety I feel any time I try to go after something that I’ve been dreaming of. Or the anxiety I feel when I actually go for it.

Logically, I know that the best chance I have at succeeding in achieving my dreams is to actually go after them. But crippling fear is not logical. There are opportunities that I have had, that I have turned down, because I was just too afraid to deal with the anxiety I would experience had I taken those opportunities. I will say with absolute certainty that I have had many moments where I have tried things and stepped out on faith and have failed but those aren’t the moments that I regret the most. I regret the moments that I just didn’t step out there and try period.

Last year I was supposed to have a Year of Yes after reading Shonda Rhimes book of that same title in which she detailed how much her life turned around an d changed for the better just by saying yes. She promised herself that she would say yes to absolutely everything for an entire year. Some things she ended up wishing she hadn’t but for the most part she was forever changed for the better just by saying YES. I wanted to be that person. That did not happen. It also didn’t happen the year after that. I had modified the statement and said that I was just going to say yes more, which I did but I think that defeated the purpose behind the whole premise. I will admit I have gotten a lot better at ignoring my fear in the last few years with doing things I am terrified of but I also know I need to do better.

I haven’t gotten rid of my fear. I’m not really sure that I ever will. There was a time when I thought that I could. Now I just try the best I can to manage that fear. To not let it keep me from everything I desire to do. We all have things that make us take a beat before doing them. We have those moments where we wonder, are we doing the right thing, is this really going to work. We question whether or not we should really be going after the dream that everyone else thinks is ridiculous. We wonder if the fear is really just that gut instinct telling us that we shouldn’t do something, or us talking ourselves out of what we know we need to do. I guess fear can be tricky that way.

Until next time… #BeBold #BeCouragous #BeMotivated

Jimmetta Carpenter

Writer/Editor

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https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCPU35EkFSbuxgekCp4LfI5g

Side note: I have a new Author Newsletter that I would love it if you signed up for http://www.tinyletter.com/Author_JCCarpenter

Another Side Note: If any of you would like to buy me a coffee and donate to my creative endeavors then please feel free to https://ko-fi.com/authorjccarpenter

Take the Limits Off Your Dreams

October 4, 2021 jcladyluv

“Don’t base your hopes on your perceived limitations” ~ Steve Harvey

I’ve been thinking a lot about the opportunities that we pass up on in life, for one reason or another. I don’t know whether it’s a lack of belief in our own abilities, or because you start to believe the doubts others have of your abilities, or just out of the sheer fear of failing out loud. I think that we tend to short change ourselves when we talk ourselves out of opportunities because of our own limits.

I have a lot of ambition and a lot of things that I want to do with my writing and my brand. I also have a lot of things that I wished I would have went for and just didn’t, not for lack of hope, but because of my own limitations. I have an idea of things that I can do or can’t do and sometimes I don’t give myself enough credit.

I have certain writing positions that I have seen that I want to submit for but I haven’t because I simply am anxious about whether my writing would be good enough, because of my perceived limitations in my abilities. I at one point wanted to try my hand at acting but I could not get past my own hang-ups and my own doubts in what I would or wouldn’t be able to do. I’ve wanted to reach out to try to interview authors and entrepreneurs but because I feel that doubt creeping in I haven’t. I’ve seemingly convinced myself that there’s no way that they would do an interview for my magazine because they are who they are, without even attempting to get the interview.

I am fully aware that I place limitations on myself mainly out fear and self doubt which is a difficult beast to tame. Sometimes, even when you think that you’ve moved past the fear and then it just hits you out of nowhere. Limitations are fine for many things, one being when you are setting boundaries in terms of the people you allow in your life. The point when limitations become damaging is when you allow them to hold you back from everything that you are capable of achieving.

What is it that you are telling yourself that you won’t accomplish? What have you convinced yourself that you’re not good enough at so you shouldn’t even give it a shot? What dreams have you short changed yourself from because you allowed yourself to think that they are too unattainable? It’s not too late to change that way of thinking around and to take the limits off of yourself. Start today! Go out for that one goal that you thought you couldn’t reach. I assure you that you will get closer to that goal if you don’t limit yourself. Let’s work on that together!

Until next time… #BeAmbitious #BeBold #BeFearless

Jimmetta Carpenter

Writer/Editor

http://www.facebook.com/people/Jimmetta-Carpenter/1069480310

https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCPU35EkFSbuxgekCp4LfI5g

Side note: I have a new Author Newsletter that I would love it if you signed up for http://www.tinyletter.com/Author_JCCarpenter

Another Side Note: If any of you would like to buy me a coffee and donate to my creative endeavors then please feel free to https://ko-fi.com/authorjccarpenter

Some Moves Need to Be Made in Silence

September 27, 2021 jcladyluv

I read in a book before, I believe it was a Steve Harvey book, that you shouldn’t share all of your dreams with the people around you. Not because your dreams are silly or anything like that, or even because you’re afraid someone is going to steal your idea, but because of the people who will try to dim your light and dampen your drive and enthusiasm. So while I share a lot with you guys about the things that I want or plan to do, I don’t share some of the plans that are the most important to me because I just don’t want anyone to throw cold water on my dreams and trying to tell me what they think I won’t be able to do.

This morning I heard something new that caught my attention. I always speak to everyone I come in contact with (I try to anyway) by saying good morning or good afternoon and then asking them how they are doing. There’s a cashier that I regularly go to at the store and every time I ask how she’s doing she says “oh I can’t complain” which in and of itself is an excellent stance to take on life. That while I could complain (there are some things I could definitely complain about) what would be the point. She put an extra twist on that this morning. She said “she never wants to let the devil know her business”, meaning that once you release that complaint, the devil gets to working and he gets busy. If you don’t complain then you don’t give the devil anything to work with. I love that.

I had never thought of it like that and it was an amazing outlook. I suppose essentially the idea is that you move forward on your journey in silence (obviously not complete and total silence—I mean I have a close circle of people that I share things with because those are my people), not sharing intimate details of your plans with a ton of people and not sharing any details of the obstacles and pitfalls that you hit along your path. I think sometimes we tend to share so many of our thoughts with others, either in person or via social media, and we forget to follow through with those plans. I’m not suggesting that people are styling and profiling (wow showing my age with that phrase lol) for the masses but sometimes we do a lot more talking and neglect to put in the action that’s needed to make things happen.

I know that for myself I have been working on the not complaining part because I don’t want to put that energy out into the universe (I mean isn’t there already enough negative energy in this world right now) and complaining doesn’t really help make anything better. I think that keeping a positive mindset and not focusing on or dwelling in the things that happen to us, the things that we can’t necessarily change, just takes time away from the good things that you can be doing with our time and our energy. There is far too much work to be done on our individual journey’s to waste any amount of time on things that don’t help to move us forward. I hope that you have a good group of people around you that you can confide in, but make sure you don’t confide in just anyone because those random people could be the one’s secretly wishing for you to fail. Just know that you can’t tell everyone the moves you’re planning to make, you just simply have to move.

Until next time… #BeBold #BeCourageous #BeConfident

Jimmetta Carpenter

Writer/Editor

http://www.facebook.com/people/Jimmetta-Carpenter/1069480310

https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCPU35EkFSbuxgekCp4LfI5g

Side note: I have a new Author Newsletter that I would love it if you signed up for http://www.tinyletter.com/Author_JCCarpenter

Another Side Note: If any of you would like to buy me a coffee and donate to my creative endeavors then please feel free to https://ko-fi.com/authorjccarpenter

You Have to Protect Your Space

September 20, 2021 jcladyluv

I am extremely careful about who I let into my space these days. I have gone from being a person with a wide circle of friends and associates to a person who just has a few select friends that I interact with, and they are people who understand that my space is precious to me and that the energy in my space can’t be negative. But then there are family members that can’t exactly be ignored or discarded because, well, they’re family.

It’s not easy to ignore negative criticism or when people talk down to you about your dreams or the things that you are working towards. It’s particularly hard when it comes from unexpected places like your family. This past weekend a family member made sure that they sent me a text message first thing in the morning to convey how sad they were that it didn’t seem like people were buying my book and that it didn’t look like I was getting any support from even my fellow authors on my Ko-fi page. They proceeded to tell me ways that I could bring more attention to my book and my site in general.

Mind you this person is not experienced in marketing (for the record nether am I), they have no idea what I have sold or haven’t sold book wise, and this person also refused to promote my book at all in the lead up to its release. Now I am okay with their lack of support even though they are family and to be fair they have contributed to my Ko-fi page (which is how they know I’m not getting enough support—at least in their eyes) but that doesn’t give them the right to try to poison my day. This person is the kind of person that somehow sees negative comments and unsolicited negative advice as them being helpful. They see negativity as a tool to toughen someone up and light the proverbial fire under them.

Now I have come a long way in learning how to ignore the negative self-talk that I have in my own mind and to put a positive spin on nearly everything because honestly it doesn’t help me to see the negative points about what I’m working towards. I know that there are some people that it works for but I am not one of those people. As a person who has suffered with many bouts of deep depression and still struggles not to let myself get to that place again, I don’t need someone pointing out every negative thing they can think of. Trust me, I have probably already said it to myself anyway.

Now this person also clearly has not researched the statistical data behind the fact the most authors do not sell a ton of books with their first book, maybe not even their second or third (hell Dan Brown said no one even paid attention to him until his fourth book) and I knew that going in and have had that fact in my mind. I don’t write or publish books to try and get rich (not that I would mind it lol). I write and publish because I love it, always have since I was ten years old (really six) and because I have things to say that I feel are important enough that someone else might actually want to read it and might even get something out of it.

This family member seems to always, when I’m at my most peaceful state, want to drop their words of negativity in my lap and just thinks I’m supposed to thank them for it. They don’t respect my space and they don’t seem to understand or care that the negative comments are not just hurtful and destructive, but they’re just unnecessary. I’m not going to deny that I got in my feelings about this message that morning for about an hour or two but then I let it go. I proceeded to ignore any further messages and didn’t respond to the one’s that were sent and I went back to protecting my space.

We all have different ideas of what our happy place is. That place of peace where even if the world starts to crumble (or feels like it anyway) you still are armed with the knowledge and self-assurance that everything will be okay. It’s that space where I know that God would never give me more than I can handle and if I’m not strong enough he will be there to provide me with the strength that I need. We have to protect our spaces and keep those who wish to destroy it out, and not to be mean or nasty, but to keep ourselves sane and okay. I hope that you are protecting your space and I wish you well in doing so.

Until next time… #BeProtective #BeMindful #BeMotivated

Jimmetta Carpenter

Writer/Editor

http://www.facebook.com/people/Jimmetta-Carpenter/1069480310

https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCPU35EkFSbuxgekCp4LfI5g

Side note: I have a new Author Newsletter that I would love it if you signed up for http://www.tinyletter.com/Author_JCCarpenter

Another Side Note: If any of you would like to buy me a coffee and donate to my creative endeavors then please feel free to https://ko-fi.com/authorjccarpenter

Do I Really Need to Say Yes More?

September 13, 2021 jcladyluv

I read Shonda Rhimes book, Year of Yes, a couple of years ago and I vowed after reading it to start saying yes to things more often. Essentially I promised myself that I would be more open to change. After all, isn’t saying yes more geared towards the things that are out of your comfort zone and that you normally wouldn’t do? I will admit that there are some things that I have done since reading that books that I ordinarily wouldn’t have done, one of them being starting my YouTube channel. There’s a few more things that I have done that required me to step out of my bubble of comfort but I would assess that there have been far more times that saying no was the better move for me.

I have struggled in the past to find that balance between throwing caution to the wind and saying yes to things and knowing when to draw the line and just say no for myself. It would seem that at the moment when I finally learned how to say no to the things that I don’t want to do for my own sanity and self-care, that I lost some of that ability to say yes. I do believe that the Pandemic of the last year and a half also gave me further permission to be more of a no person than that yes person that I was working on becoming.

Honestly, I’m not sure that I want to be that ‘say yes to everything’ person because I don’t know that I would be a very happy person if I did that. I spent most of my childhood, my twenties, and a sizable chunk of my thirties saying yes to things that I just didn’t want to do at all, but not for the aspect of change, rather to please other people. I don’t know if it’s different when you’re saying yes for change and saying yes to people please but either way I don’t know that I can be that person. Sometimes no really is the right answer.

Now this is not anything against the people who say yes to every single thing and who love doing so. I think that it’s great to discover what works for you and if you are someone who says no to EVERYTHING then you should definitely read Shonda Rhimes book and incorporate yes more into your vocabulary. It’s good to explore and step out of the bubble of comfort sometimes. For me, I just cannot say yes to everything because then I get in this place where I start feeling like I’m doing things more for someone else and not for myself. I don’t want to go back to that place where I’m pleasing everyone else by saying yes to what they think I should do to the detriment of my own mental health and my own joy. I will not give up this peace that I have found and if that means I say no more than yes, so be it.

Until next time… #BeTruetoYourself #BeStrong #BeAuthentic

Jimmetta Carpenter

Writer/Editor

http://www.facebook.com/people/Jimmetta-Carpenter/1069480310