Tag: Write 2 Be

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The First Time Around

August 14, 2012 jcladyluv

Ever wonder what might have been different if all of the opportunities that you have been given, you had got it right the first time around? If you had the money to do everything that you need and want to do to become successful would you actually be doing them right now instead of just wishing you could be doing them?

I’ve been thinking a lot about the things that I need to do to get things going the way that I need them to be going and how the lack of money has held me up from actually following through with a lot of those things. I’ve also been thinking about all of the opportunities that I have had that could have enabled me to be in a different place right now that I have just somehow squandered away. What kind of difference would it make if I had got it all right the first time around?

If I had finished college the first time I went and completed my degrees then, instead having to work extra hard to try and finish them up now, so late in the game, then I might already be working in the media industry now as I have always dreamed of. I might have already moved to New York like I wanted to all those years ago so that I can be surrounded by exactly the right people I need to be surrounded by. I could have all the right contacts and connections and I would already have my foot in the door that I am trying hard to kick down now.

I could have learned from the best how to be the best and already be halfway up the ladder by now instead of still being on the second or third rung. I probably would already be on some New York Time’s best sellers list and I probably would have already had about three or four novels out by now because I would not have had any other responsibilities to worry about other then myself and my work. I could have already achieved so much by now if I had only done things right the first time around.

Money would most likely not be an issue (being a New York Time’s best seller and all and working as an editor for a publishing company while freelancing for some of the most prestigious magazines that are housed in New York) so I would not have any problem trying to get my own media empire started because with only myself as a responsibility and my work of course, I could put away money towards that empire and the things that I need to do for it. Life could be so different right now.

But the catch to all of that what if stuff is that if all of that had transpired (so-called) right the first time around, then I wouldn’t have met my daughter’s father and I wouldn’t have my wonderful, beautiful, and intelligent daughter who I would not trade for any amount of money, success, or fame. She is the reason that I get up in the morning and I really have a hard time trying to ever envision my life without her in it. She makes me want to fight harder to get things back on track and to make sure that she never gets off track. But also she is proof to me that sometimes what you think would have turned out better if it had been done right the first time around, might not actually be the case.

I don’t even know if all of that would have come to be without her coming along in my life, but I do know that the possibility is not lost. I also know that she has enriched my life in ways that I think make me a better writer and a better person. We can always wonder what would be different if we had another attempt at doing things all over again but when you really think about it, perhaps what you considered to be right in the first place was all wrong for you. Perhaps for our second shot at things, rather then wishing we could go back and do things differently we should treat our new opportunities as if they are what’s right for us now. Let’s try not looking back at a past we can’t change, but instead looking forward to a future that was meant to be.

Jimmetta Carpenter

Writer/Editor

The Diary: Succession of Lies (Now Available)

Writing as “Jaycee Durant”

http://www.facebook.com/people/Jimmetta-Carpenter/1069480310

http://www.passionatewriterpublishing.com/thediary.htm

Are You Living Your Life Or The Life Someone Else Thinks You Should Be Living?

August 2, 2012 jcladyluv

I love my emails that I get from the Tyler Perry mailing list. I swear it’s as if he knows when I need to hear a specific message and writes them just for me. Like he was somehow the vessel that God chose (one of the many vessels) to send me a very bold and clear message. He sent a message that didn’t mince words and didn’t beat around the bush by sugar coating things. The subject title in this particular email was simple: Don’t let anybody define you!

His email talked about how when he was a young boy he had so many people tell him that he would never make it, that he would never become a millionaire because he was black or because he was poor. Among those many people there was actually a teacher and even some of his family. I understood exactly what he was talking about because I have always been told that I would never amount to anything by the one person who is supposed to think the world of me, my mother.

Now there are plenty of others who have said things like I dream too big, and I am never going to become successful, and I’m always going to be in a state of struggle, and basically that all of my efforts to become successful and to build my own company doing what I love to do and what I know is meant for me to do are for nothing. I would like to say that I haven’t listened to those words of discouragement and that I responded to those negative voices in a way that Tyler Perry did, by ignoring them and doing it anyway. But I can’t say that because I have spent the better part of my life trying to defy what I was told I couldn’t do all the while, deep down, believing in what those voices were saying.

I have since learned to tune out those voices (for the most part anyway) but every once and a while, mostly when I have a new idea or a new way to develop and produce the ideas I already have, those voices do get deep inside my head and sometimes they even manage to convince me that they are right, but only for a little while. When I read this message from Tyler Perry, it came after I had just finished brainstorming an idea with Ms. L. on how to bring one of my dreams on my list of accomplishments to fruition and those doubts began to creep in on whether or not I could really do this.

I shared some brief ideas with another person that I thought could possibly help me in one area of making my idea a reality but they essentially told me every possible thing that could go wrong and that could keep me from being able to do it. Not what I needed to hear. I know everything that can go wrong. I know that I am operating on little to no money most times and that my credit might not be so hot to a bank or possible investors. So What?

I am finally starting to realize that if I am constantly waiting for the money fairy to rain some money on my dream then I might never make it happen. I have to have faith that it will happen, not just because it is a really good idea, but because it was what was meant for me to do. God didn’t give me this gift for nothing and he sure doesn’t expect me to waste it. So I’m not going to waste it.

It’s hard to think that you have to tune out the people who are supposed to be close to you but if they can’t support me in living the life that I want to live then I don’t need to listen to words that aren’t driving me forward. I’m done living the way everyone else thinks I should. I can’t live the life other people would rather me live because that wasn’t the life that was meant for me. Whose life are you living, yours or someone else’s?

Jimmetta Carpenter

Writer/Editor

The Diary: Succession of Lies (Now Available)

Writing as “Jaycee Durant”

http://www.facebook.com/people/Jimmetta-Carpenter/1069480310

http://www.passionatewriterpublishing.com/thediary.htm

Gearing Up For Another Writing Marathon

July 31, 2012 jcladyluv

So a few posts ago I wrote about doing Camp NaNoWriMo this August so that I can not only finish my novel that I started in last November’s NaNoWriMo but also so that I can get my writing groove back. Although you might think that I wouldn’t have to do the same necessary steps to prepare for this that I did in November because at least this time I am not starting from scratch, that is far from the truth.

Even though I don’t have to come up with an outline and create character sketches I still have to get a handle on my time management. Not only am I just getting my bearings within my Master’s in Psychology program and but I am really trying to work on some freelance work and trying to pitch certain magazines and increase the success of my business, throw a novel in the mix along with the everyday fulltime job of being a mom. Not to mention, I have just thought of another business idea that has some real true potential to make me and my family some money and could launch a lot of things for me, and I have to start putting in the research for that quickly.

I already know what my issue is that I have to work on during this coming month of August, time management. I suppose this will mean a lot less TV and telephone (accept for my very necessary conversations with Ms. L. that tend to turn into brainstorming sessions) and a lot more late nights—and by late nights I mean one’s that are productive late nights and not me catching up on my TV. Thank goodness for my DVR. Well I have a lot of organizing of my time to go figure out and I hope that some of you out there click on the link in the post for CampNaNoWriMo and join in on the writing challenge with me. Tomorrow begins the rest of my novel. Yay!

Jimmetta Carpenter

Writer/Editor

The Diary: Succession of Lies (Now Available)

Writing as “Jaycee Durant”

http://www.facebook.com/people/Jimmetta-Carpenter/1069480310

http://www.passionatewriterpublishing.com/thediary.htm

Redefining What Is Possible

July 19, 2012 jcladyluv

It seems as if this week God is sending me all sorts of signs to lead me in the direction that I need to go. It’s as if every doubt that I have is getting answered and addressed each day of the week and leaving me with absolutely NO excuses. The other day I was going over just how many things were holding me back from just diving right in and then Ms. L. tells me about her 11 year old son starting his business with probably more limitations than I have, and yet here I am holding myself back.

This morning I was thinking of all of the big dreaming that I keep doing and wondering just how much of what I want to accomplish is attainable. I mean just what are my possibilities of making all of this stuff actually happen. I was honestly going over the list of life goals that I made a long, long time ago in my head and wondering just what it was that I should cross off because it just wouldn’t be possible. Then I heard a remarkable story on the news this morning about a man who had just climbed the tallest mountain in the world, Mount Kilimanjaro. Now I know what you’re thinking. What’s so special about that, surely he’s not the first person to do that? That would be a true statement, but I believe that he is the fist person to do it with no legs.

Spencer West was born with a genetic disorder in which his lower spine was poorly developed and left his legs permanently crossed and essentially useless. By the time he was 5 years old he had to have his legs amputated to just below the pelvis area. The doctors told him and his parents that he would never be able to sit up let alone walk and that he would never be a functioning member of society.

Not only did he defy what the doctors limited him to but he has gone on to do public speaking, candidly telling his story in hopes of inspiring others that anything is possible. He works with a charity called Free The Children and the climb up the mountain was a campaign that he called Redefine Possible and helped to raise almost $750,000 for the charity.

Now as I am watching and listening to him speak and being so inspired by his story, I am wondering how can anything on my list of goals be considered impossible when this man, who has every reason to think that his options are limited, doesn’t see that there is anything that is not possible. It is completely ironic how the stories that you need to hear the most, the one’s that truly will inspire you, always come right at the exact moment that you need to hear them.

I suppose that it’s not really about my big dreams and goals being impossible, it’s more so about what my definition of possible really is. Everything is not possible for every individual, but once again, this is not about what someone else deems as being possible when it comes to my ambitions. It’s only about my own interpretation of just how far I can go and what I know is not impossible. It’s kind of hard to think that there is anything that you can’t do once you see a man with no legs climb the tallest mountain in the world.

Jimmetta Carpenter

Writer/Editor

The Diary: Succession of Lies (Now Available)

Writing as “Jaycee Durant”

http://www.facebook.com/people/Jimmetta-Carpenter/1069480310

http://www.passionatewriterpublishing.com/thediary.htm

The Lesson That A Cinematic Genius In the Making Has Taught Me

July 18, 2012 jcladyluv

I think that anyone who knows me knows that I don’t mind learning valuable lessons from children. Sometimes the people who show us whether or not we are moving in the right direction or whether or not we’re just stuck standing still are the children that are a part of our lives, whether it be our own or someone else’s child.

My best friend Ms. L has an 11 year old cinematic genius in the making. It is amazing to think that at his young age he can make his own movies, cut and edit film, put together book trailers and produce graphic artwork as if it were as easy as breathing. He is truly a gifted little boy and Ms. L told me last night that he has finally decided that he wants to make a go of it as a real official business so that he can make the money he needs to afford the more high tech things that he needs to go even further in his adventures of film making.

I mean it shouldn’t come as a surprise that he’s so talented because his mom is essentially the most gifted writer that I know. What amazes me even more is the fact that in one night he managed to make this decision, create him a website (a freebie one—he is a kid after all), create business cards and rehearse his spiel that would land him his first of many clients (which he got the next day by the way). In one night. I am 32 and have been working at making my dream a reality for the last decade or so and I am still not as far along as I should be. It really made me (and Ms. L too) think ‘what the hell am I doing and why am I wasting so much time?’

I keep getting in my own way, so much so that I’m sometimes not even able to recognize that that is what I am doing. I tell myself that I will get rejected for an article before I even bother to try sending it off. I tell myself that no one will like the story or characters I have created before actually giving it a real shot. I constantly tell myself all of the reasons why I can’t do something without seeing the most important reason why I can, because it was something that I was meant to do.

I believe that everyone is talented at something and even if there are a hundred writers out there who are just as talented as I am, it is only me who can write the stories that I was meant to write and who can tell them in only the way that I can. I’m no Maya Angelou, or Terry McMillan, or Alice Walker, but I am Jimmetta Carpenter and just as I can not write the way that they do, they can not write the way that I do either.

Ms. L.’s son has so much belief in himself that he is not letting the fact that he’s 11 and has no real money of his own to fund his business stop him. He’s just diving right in and handling whatever hiccups happen along the way. My God if an 11 year old can have that frame of mind about his business then why on earth can’t I. My best friend’s son doesn’t realize the lesson that his leap of faith has taught me but one day he will realize that he just showed me that the only person that is really in my way, is me.

Jimmetta Carpenter

Writer/Editor

The Diary: Succession of Lies (Now Available)

Writing as “Jaycee Durant”

http://www.facebook.com/people/Jimmetta-Carpenter/1069480310

http://www.passionatewriterpublishing.com/thediary.htm

I Don’t Like Looking At the Empty Calendar Squares

July 11, 2012 jcladyluv

I don’t like it when I feel a touch of envy. Not a bad envy (although I’m not really sure there is a good kind of envy) but the kind of envy that motivates you into actually doing something. Now you might be wondering, if it motivates me to get going again, then why wouldn’t I like it?

It can never be a bad thing to get re-motivated to do something that you know you should already be doing. That’s just it right there. I don’t like it because it’s something that I already know in the back of my mind, that I should be doing as it is and that I shouldn’t have to watch or read about other people doing it to get moving in that direction.

I was reading some other bloggers posts as I was doing some research for a project, and I kept reading about other writers having such busy schedules. Talk about going to conferences, and doing book signings, and interviews, and things of that nature; the things that I feel like I should be out there doing too.

It’s not as if I wouldn’t like to have a full calendar and to have to tell people that I have this book signing to do, or that conference to speak at, or this interview to give. In fact every year when I buy those desk calendars or day planners I can see in my mind the pages, one after the other, full of appointments and deadlines that just can’t be missed. And yet year after year those pages have gone blank, left unfilled, and more time passes.

I guess the only thing left to really figure out is when I am going to get around to filling those pages up. I suppose I would have to finish filling up the pages of the rest of my novel that is still undone, or finish one of the other projects that I am working on. It’s not easy to have those blank squares on the calendar taunting me with missed opportunities.

Jimmetta Carpenter

Writer/Editor

The Diary: Succession of Lies (Now Available)

Writing as “Jaycee Durant”

http://www.facebook.com/people/Jimmetta-Carpenter/1069480310

http://www.passionatewriterpublishing.com/thediary.htm

From One Struggling Writer to the Rest Who Think They Are Struggling Alone

July 9, 2012 jcladyluv

Sometime last week (it may have been the week before that) Ms. L sent me a link to a blog post titled Don’t Break the Chain by a wonderful blogger named Catherine Ryan Howard who I am now following (and you all should be too). Ms. L knows I have been struggling with finding the time to write and work on all things related to my writing business so she thought that this would be helpful. Well as usual, Ms. L always knows just what I need to read (and hear) to get me jump started again. Of course it helped to know that this post also helped Ms. L as well because I knew that I was not alone in my struggles to be productive in my writing efforts.

Well the blog post talked about many things in regards to one being more productive but more importantly it gave the idea of marking off days on a calendar with a red X for every day that you have accomplished your daily writing goals, whether it be actually writing or working on the business side of your writing career, and of course after so many days of seeing a chain of red X’s you get into the mode of not wanting to break that chain and having to see those X’s stare you in the face everyday becomes an incentive to actually get things done.

Well there is a website that helps with that, for those of us who don’t want to go out and buy a huge wall calendar to mark down the days. The website (once you register) will allow you to mark each day with a red square for every day that you have achieved your daily goals and you can even create other chains for you business efforts or whatever other goals you want to set. I signed up (almost immediately) and have found it to be extremely helpful.

I have actually been getting things done because I simply just don’t want to break the chains that I have created for myself. Who knew something so simple as marking off days on a calendar could be so helpful in keeping me focused and making me produce more work. I hope that any of you out there who is struggling with this very same issue clicks on the links to the websites and gets started on their road to becoming more productive.

Jimmetta Carpenter

Writer/Editor

The Diary: Succession of Lies (Now Available)

Writing as “Jaycee Durant”

http://www.facebook.com/people/Jimmetta-Carpenter/1069480310

http://www.passionatewriterpublishing.com/thediary.htm

Is the Fighter Still in There Somewhere?

June 13, 2012 jcladyluv

I was sitting here wondering what to write about tonight? Honestly right now all I feel is a sense of loss. No, no one in my family or close to me died but in some ways I am wondering if the best part of me did. I was just asking my best friend Ms. L. last night whether or not she remembered the times when she would call me and I would rush her off the phone telling her that ‘I have to call you back because I’m writing and I have to get this out’. She said that she remembered that very well. I asked her where did that person go and she simply responded, ‘she’ll be back’.

For as long as I could remember I have wanted to be a writer and have books upon books out on shelves and change the world with my words. But that wasn’t all that I had hoped for. I wanted to be immersed in creativity from singing and acting and even dancing. More importantly I wanted to be a symbol for why the arts and creativity is so necessary in this world.

I don’t know whether I just got so bogged down by the many people that were in my life telling me that I couldn’t do what I always felt I was meant to do. I don’t know if I just got tired of being rejected and not having the resources I needed to make my dreams a reality. I don’t know if there’s just some part of me that just got tired of fighting for those dreams.

As I sit here, still mentally thinking up ideas for my next story, I am still unable to finish the novel that I have been working on since the end of last year. While I know there are tons of query letters that I need to send out to agents for the second novel I have already done (which is with my editor), I can’t seem to craft the perfect one to send out. Although I have dozens of ideas for articles to write and even articles that I’ve already written that I need to write query letters for, I still find myself scared that the query letters won’t be perfect enough to get accepted.

So what happened to the fighter that I had in me ready to do whatever it took? What happened to the person who was prepared to stay up however long it took to get the work done? What happened to that person who, when she didn’t have what she needed, made up the resources where there weren’t any, just to fulfill her purpose? I know that she’s still in there somewhere. I just don’t know where the fight in me went.

What I do know is that the passion is still there. The desire is still there. I still wake up with stories in my head and new ideas for the stories I have yet to finish. I still mentally am working on my vision for my media and publishing company. I am still dreaming up ideas for the creativity camp that I want to create for kids so that they understand just how important the arts are to have in their lives. I know that my dreams haven’t changed and they haven’t faded away. I just need to dig that fighter in me back out.

Jimmetta Carpenter

Writer/Editor

The Diary: Succession of Lies (Now Available)

Writing as “Jaycee Durant”

http://www.facebook.com/people/Jimmetta-Carpenter/1069480310

http://www.passionatewriterpublishing.com/thediary.htm

So You Think You’re Special

June 12, 2012June 12, 2012 jcladyluv

There was a recent uproar when a high school English teacher, David McCullough Jr., gave a graduation commencement speech at Wellesley High School in Massachusetts telling the graduating seniors that they were not special. There have been many negative comments stating that a commencement speech is supposed to be uplifting and motivating for those high school seniors, sending them off into the world full of hope and optimism. I can see where they are coming from because when I was in high school I might have felt a little let down by being told that I wasn’t special. But the fact is that it’s the truth.

Mr. McCullough is only doing what a lot of us parents won’t dare to do for their child as they go off into the world ready to pursue their dreams. Prepare them for the cold hard truth that there are thousands of other people out there just like them. There are thousands of people that have just graduated high school, some with honors. There are thousands of people that have been accepted into top notch universities and are majoring in the very same thing that they are. There are thousands of people that want to change the world just like they do. There are thousands of people who are just as smart and as talented as they are. In other words, they are not special.

Now obviously Mr. McCullough didn’t really mean to discourage these kids into thinking that all that they had accomplished thus far meant absolutely nothing and that all the hard work they had put in until that point was all for nothing. He simply didn’t want to send them out into this big old world thinking that there weren’t thousands of other people just like them, who had accomplished the same things and worked just as hard.

Of course our children are special to us, and everything they do is special and remarkable, but if we don’t prepare them for the fact that when they go out into this world, what we see as being remarkable, the rest of world will see as simply average, then we are doing them a disservice. We are not giving them the proper tools to really make something of themselves. They need to know that the world can be their oyster but it will not just open itself up to them without them putting in the work to pry it open.

We keep sending them out into the world with this sense of entitlement, thinking that they are so special that they don’t have anyone else out there to compete with. We are allowing them to dilute themselves into thinking that they are the only one’s who can do whatever it is that they do. But they are not. We have to let them know that they will have to fight for their rightful place in a world full of people who are exactly like them. As David McCullough stated in his speech, “if everyone is special, then no one is.”

Jimmetta Carpenter

Writer/Editor

The Diary: Succession of Lies (Now Available)

Writing as “Jaycee Durant”