Tag: Doubt

A Shift in Your Favor

jcladyluv

Last week was a week of doubts and second guessing myself.  I have those every once and a while and I try not to have moments like those too often because it interrupts the progress that I do make when I get sidetracked by my own doubts.  As usual, when I am in the need of some extra guidance and I am feeling doubtful God seems to put the right message in my ear that I need, at just the right time.

I was flipping through channels late the other night (about 2 am) and I stumbled upon a Joel Osteen program.  I was actually getting ready to turn to something completely different but something told me to keep it right there on that channel.  So I kept it on that channel and I watched and the first several words that I heard was him talking about 2013 being the year of the shift, when everything is going to start shifting in your favor.

Right then I knew what that something was that told me not to turn that channel.  Joel Osteen continued his message, saying that while you (the audience) might feel that you have been struggling a little longer then you thought you were going to, and as if it may be too late to accomplish your dreams, and like the obstacles that are in your way are just too big to get past, don’t give up because God is about to shift things in your favor.  I felt as if he was talking directly to me (even though I know there are a lot of people who need that message as well) and it gave me that drive back again and even a little more hope.

He reminded me of something that I should make sure to never forget and that is that even the things that seem like they are not even in the realm of possibility, are possible when God moves it into your path and when he places things in your favor.  What God has created for you, is for you no matter what because he is not going to allow anyone to keep you from your destiny.

Even when we do receive the blessings that we ask for, we tend to question it, feeling as though sometimes we don’t deserve it or as if we didn’t rightfully earn it.  In Joel Osteen’s message he made sure to address that as well by simply saying “don’t question God’s favor and the blessings he has given you on purpose.”  Some things just sound so much simpler when you hear it out of someone else’s mouth.  Why wouldn’t we deserve the blessings that we have asked for and what really constitutes earning it.  Really all you need to do is have hope and faith that when you go to God, he will answer you back favorably if it is meant for you.

I have said it since the beginning of this year that I really feel like this year is going to be different.  I feel like this year is somehow the time when things are going to move around for me and start working in my favor.  I feel like all of the goals and dreams I have been moving toward accomplishing are finally going to begin coming into fruition.  I have spoken all of things that I aspire towards into existence for so long that I believe they are finally going to start becoming a reality.

I know that I have my moments where I am doubtful of what I am doing, I think we all do.  However, one thing is for sure, I will never allow myself to give up because to me that would suggest that I don’t believe that God wants all of the best for me.  God wants the best for all of us.  There is no one that he wants to fail.  We fail when we don’t believe in the power of God’s favor.  So this year, let’s start speaking the good things that are meant for us into existence.  Let’s embrace the shift that is going to come our way this year and the God is always working in our favor.

 I Have the Write 2 Be Hopeful… What is Your Write 2 Be?

 

Jimmetta Carpenter

Writer/Editor

The Diary: Succession of Lies (Now Available)

Writing as “Jaycee Durant”

https://write-2-be.com/

http://unpleasantlyplump.wordpress.com/

http://www.facebook.com/people/Jimmetta-Carpenter/1069480310

 

Write 2 Be Magazine is now out so please go check it out at http://write2bemagazine.com/.  Also please go and join the magazine on twitter https://twitter.com/write2bemag, join the email listing for the magazine or submit a request for an author interview at Write2bemagazine@yahoo.com, and also like the Write 2 Be Magazine fan page https://www.facebook.com/Write2BeMagazine.  Please help support my endeavor and my new journey and help me spread the word about Write 2 Be and its meaning.

Right Where I Belong

jcladyluv

I’ve felt a little unsure of myself this week.  I guess you could say I’ve been doing a lot of second guessing (and I know that I shouldn’t) which is a bad habit I am trying to get rid of.  It’s been a week of feeling uncertain but I was watching a program this morning where the focus was the film director James Cameron and how he became such a visionary.  He said a lot of things that struck a chord with me and it kind of put things into perspective.

I get asked so many times by people who don’t consider writing an actual job (at least not a very viable one) why, when my reward thus far has been so little and the struggle has been so hard, why do I continue to pull my hair out over it.  Why don’t I just get a regular 9 to 5 job and settle with the joy of having a steady paycheck will do for my life.  They tell me it would make me so much happier, steadier, and that I would be able to do so much more for myself and my daughter.  Some days I don’t know the answer to those questions.  Not any that would make sense anyway.  But most days, the answers are simple, maybe not easy for others to understand, but they make sense for me.

For a large part of my childhood, all of my adolescence, and the vast majority of my adulthood I have doubted everything, and I had believed what my mother always made sure to remind me of which was that I was never going to be anybody and I was never going to get anywhere.  I let her words carry over into too many aspects of my life and while it was her lack of support that fueled my own doubts, it was my mistake for not recognizing that she was one of those negative people that I needed to steer clear of.  However, the one thing that I have never been uncertain of was my writing.

Sure there have been times that I have wondered if my writing could measure up to others, and if it was really truly about who you know rather then your actual talent, but I’ve always known that writing was what I was supposed to be doing with my life.  I never really had to be one of those people who had to search for what God’s purpose was for me because I’ve known from a very early age that it was my writing.  Not necessarily writing just in the form of novels, or poetry, or even launching my own magazine and eventually my publishing company.  But my words, they mean something and what I have to say matters.  My vision for where I want to go within my writing career has the potential to really change things and that is something I am not doubtful of.

I made a decision years ago that I could no longer do the 9 to 5 thing.  I couldn’t work towards building someone else’s dream while mine continued to sit on the back burner indefinitely, and on top of that, miss the most important moments of my daughters life because of it.  It’s not that I think that there is anything wrong with that, there are plenty of people who do it and I admire their ability to make that work, it just isn’t something that was working so well for me.  I wasn’t happy, in fact I was miserable, and I feel like my daughter could sense how miserable I was and that it weighed on her too.

I had always felt like I didn’t fit in at those places I worked at, like I wasn’t where I was supposed to be.  Now, I may not have as steady a stream of income coming in as I would like (for now anyway), and I may be seen to those people who don’t consider writing to be a job as always struggling (which may not be far from accurate) and doing nothing, but I am actually a lot happier then I was when I was working a regular full time job and trying to cram in my dream a few hours every night.  I feel as though, as uncertain as where the journey I am on is going to lead me, what isn’t uncertain is that I am in deed on the right journey, for me.

What is the meaning of going through this life if what you are doing, on a day to day basis, pushing towards your future, is not what you want to be doing, if it’s not your purpose?  I feel as though being among other artists; other creative people, other people who are considered to be weird and strange; other people whose broad and elaborate imaginations are considered to be eccentric and unrealistic; this is where I belong.

I Have the Write 2 Be Where I Feel I Belong…What is Your Write 2 Be?

 

Jimmetta Carpenter

Writer/Editor

The Diary: Succession of Lies (Now Available)

Writing as “Jaycee Durant”

https://write-2-be.com/

http://unpleasantlyplump.wordpress.com/

http://www.facebook.com/people/Jimmetta-Carpenter/1069480310

 

Write 2 Be Magazine is now out so please go check it out at http://write2bemagazine.com/.  Also please go and join the magazine on twitter https://twitter.com/write2bemag, join the email listing for the magazine or submit a request for an author interview at Write2bemagazine@yahoo.com, and also like the Write 2 Be Magazine fan page https://www.facebook.com/Write2BeMagazine.  Please help support my endeavor and my new journey and help me spread the word about Write 2 Be and its meaning.

 

The Sky Is the Limit

jcladyluv

I am consistently thinking of how I can make this year different from the previous ones.  A part of making changes within yourself and within your life is to evaluate the things that you need to change on a regular basis.  I’ve spent a lot of time placing limits on what it is that I can do in terms of my writing career.  I’ve spent a lot more time setting up boundaries that were supposed to protect me from my own big elaborate dreams and box me in to reality.

A lot of that came from listening to those negative people that were in my life, whose opinions once meant so much to me, telling me that I was only kidding myself and that having a successful career as a writer just wasn’t possible.  Although I discarded those negative people (well all except my mother—kind of hard to cut that tie) and banished their subliminal messages that continually seeped into my subconscious, it is harder to remove my own self-doubts and the limitations that I placed on myself.

It is easy to think of all of the things that you can’t do, for one reason or another, but the challenge is in removing all of those limitations and allowing yourself to envision the possibilities of what you can do.  I heard something when I was watching an Oprah interview that she did with L.L. Cool J and he mentioned some advice that Michael Jackson once gave him.  He told him to “never limit yourself”.

Some of us have such a hard time removing all of those years worth of limits that were self imposed, but just hearing those three words, it sounds so very simple.  Why am I placing all of these perimeters around me to protect me from failing when I don’t know that that’s what would happen.  And if it did, would that really be so bad.

There are some that say failing is actually what made them a better writer, or a better business person, and even more willing to take risks.  I am interested in seeing how removing those limits that I have always clung to and taking more risks is going to change things this year.  I think that it is giving me more confidence in my capabilities as a writer and as a business person.  I think that it is allowing me to be more open to change and in seeing what’s behind some of those doors that I feel are hard to open.  When you limit your own ideas of what it is that you can do, you also are limiting the possibilities of what it is that you can do for others.

I have the Write 2 Be Limitless with My Dreams…What is Your Write 2 Be?

 

Jimmetta Carpenter

Writer/Editor

The Diary: Succession of Lies (Now Available)

Writing as “Jaycee Durant”

https://write-2-be.com/

http://unpleasantlyplump.wordpress.com/

http://www.facebook.com/people/Jimmetta-Carpenter/1069480310

Write 2 Be Magazine is now out so please go check it out at http://write2bemagazine.com/.  Also please go and join the magazine on twitter https://twitter.com/write2bemag, join the email listing for the magazine or submit a request for an author interview at Write2bemagazine@yahoo.com, and also like the Write 2 Be Magazine fan page https://www.facebook.com/Write2BeMagazine.  Please help support my endeavor and my new journey and help me spread the word about Write 2 Be and its meaning.

When Hitting a Rock, Just Keep Digging

jcladyluv

I opened my emails yesterday and there was a message from Tyler Perry (sent days prior, just unopened) talking about digging deep until we get to where it is we are going and where we know God wants us to be.  He advised that even if you hit rock, if you know that it’s what’s meant for you, just keep digging.

It got me to thinking about just how long I have been digging this well (meaning my attempt at being a successful freelance writer) and just how long it seems like I have been hitting nothing but rock.  I don’t just mean rock that is movable and pliable with just a few whacks either.  I mean really hard, strong, take ten people to move, kind of rock.

Obviously I know that there are many people who are worse off than me and who might look at me and wonder what I am complaining about, and they may be right where it pertains to them.  But when you are hitting nothing but rock you really feel like it is the worst position you can be in and you feel like there is no way to move through it or past it.

But then I remember that I have faith and I have God and while I may not be able to move a rock that would ordinarily take ten people to be able to move, God is said to be able to move mountains.  In Tyler Perry’s email he spoke about hitting the rock and eventually being able to dig deeper, past that rock, and reaching your well of blessings.

I’m not sure how close I am to that well yet, but I have a feeling that there’s only so much rock left to hit and that my well is right around the corner.  I don’t know how many of you out there feel the same way, like all you’ve been hitting lately is nothing but rock while trying to get to your well, but don’t stop digging because your well may just be right past that rock.  Don’t give up too soon, I know I’m not.

 

Jimmetta Carpenter

Writer/Editor

The Diary: Succession of Lies (Now Available)

Writing as “Jaycee Durant”

https://write-2-be.com/

http://unpleasantlyplump.wordpress.com/

http://www.facebook.com/people/Jimmetta-Carpenter/1069480310

 

Write 2 Be Magazine will be debuting on January 15th, 2013 so please go join the magazine on twitter before it debuts on https://twitter.com/write2bemag and join the email listing for the magazine at Write2bemagazine@yahoo.com.  Also please feel free to like my Write 2 Be Magazine fan page https://www.facebook.com/Write2BeMagazine.  Please help support my endeavor and my new journey and help me spread the word about Write 2 Be and its meaning.

 

Nervous But Ready (I Think)

jcladyluv

It is only the second week of the New Year and already (or should I say once again) I am feeling like I’m having twinges of doubt about being successful.  I am sure it is only because I am literally a week away (6 days to be more exact) from the debut of my new online magazine and I am nervous on many different levels about it.  I am sure that it is just the devil trying to get in my ear and discourage me from actually releasing it because of all of my uncertainty but I have put it off long enough already (in large part due to the devil whispering to my subconscious) and I don’t intend to do that any longer.

When I talked to Ms. L. last night about it I told her that it was far from the perfection that I want it to be and that I wasn’t sure I could get it to be perfect by next Tuesday, she reminded me that it probably won’t be when it’s released and that there may be kinks that still need to be worked out but that I just have to do it and make the adjustments as I continue along.  She reminded me of what I already know and continually have to remind myself which is that shooting for perfection is what tends to keep me from just getting things done.

We all get a little nervous when venturing out into some new territory and even though writing isn’t new to me, having a magazine all my own to manage and having to make sure everyone (or at least the vast majority) will love it is new and it’s fun, but most of all it’s nerve wracking.  I think I would bite my nails off if I had any left to bite off.  I do have a strong feeling that this is the right direction for me and that this is the right time for me to be doing it.

 

Jimmetta Carpenter

Writer/Editor

The Diary: Succession of Lies (Now Available)

Writing as “Jaycee Durant”

https://write-2-be.com/

http://unpleasantlyplump.wordpress.com/

http://www.facebook.com/people/Jimmetta-Carpenter/1069480310

 

Write 2 Be Magazine will be debuting on January 15th, 2013 so please go join the magazine on twitter before it debuts on https://twitter.com/write2bemag and join the email listing for the magazine at Write2bemagazine@yahoo.com.  Also please feel free to like my Write 2 Be Magazine fan page https://www.facebook.com/Write2BeMagazine.  Please help support my endeavor and my new journey and help me spread the word about Write 2 Be and its meaning.

Being Optimistic Is Giving Me More Drive

jcladyluv

The first week of the New Year has actually started off pretty good.  I mean nothing miraculous happened, nothing earth shattering or life altering, but on the up side nothing terribly bad happened (at least nothing that I couldn’t handle).  I’ve actually been rather productive, at least more than normal, and while there are still things on my to-do list for the week that haven’t been completed yet, I would say that I am very proud of what I’ve accomplished so far.

That’s not saying that I don’t have a lot of improvement to do, especially in my time management skills, but I am a work in progress (as we all are) and I have progressed into not beating myself up over the things that didn’t get done.  I just know that I have to be more determined and more persistent in getting my list completed next week.  I do have some major things that I have to tackle over the weekend in the efforts to finish putting the magazine together and that is actually going to be my main focus for the weekend.

I don’t know why I have not mastered the art of time management yet but I really hope that I can shuffle things around a lot better in the coming weeks.  I have been replacing most of my negative thoughts and fears with positive outlooks and all in all (unlike the last few years) I am feeling very optimistic for this year.  Well I hope all of you have had a very productive first week of the New Year and that all of your projects are off and running.

I have the Write 2 Be Productive and Prosperous… What is your Write 2 Be?

Jimmetta Carpenter

Writer/Editor

The Diary: Succession of Lies (Now Available)

Writing as “Jaycee Durant”

https://write-2-be.com/

http://unpleasantlyplump.wordpress.com/

http://www.facebook.com/people/Jimmetta-Carpenter/1069480310

 

Write 2 Be Magazine will be debuting on January 15th, 2013 so please go join the magazine on twitter before it debuts on https://twitter.com/write2bemag and join the email listing for the magazine at Write2bemagazine@yahoo.com.  Also please feel free to go and friend me on facebook at http://www.facebook.com/people/Jimmetta-Carpenter/1069480310 and like my Write 2 Be Magazine fan page.  Please help support my endeavor and my new journey and help me spread the word about Write 2 Be and its meaning.

Tapping Into the Inner Child In All of Us

jcladyluv

I wrote yesterday about the fears that hold me back and releasing those fears.  Writing it down was quite therapeutic in many ways.  Then I read a blog post this morning from one of the many that I follow that made me think about when I was a child.

When we are children there is rarely anything that we are afraid of.  We are told (well I wasn’t told this but most children were and I believed it was true as well) that anything that you want is possible if you put your mind to it and go after it.  Children don’t really see the negative when it comes to their dreams and the future that they think up for themselves.  They try time and time again and they NEVER give up.

Think of how many times your children have tried to persuade you into getting something that they wanted and were relentless until (most likely) you finally gave in or miraculously made it happen.  My best friend Ms. L. and I are always having the situation where our kids are asking for something that they really want (because everything kids want is a matter of life or death in their mind) and it usually seems impossible for us to get them those things but their faith is unshakable and they hold firm to the fact that they are going to win out in the end.

Meanwhile we are both scratching our heads trying to think of how to make what they want possible.  Needless to say, some miraculous way we manage to be able to give them their hearts desire and all the while they never had any doubt that we would.  In their minds it was always going to work out to their benefit and just the way they wanted it.  Now that’s some kind of faith.  Just imagine if we could all tap back into that childlike faith when it comes to our dreams and our hearts desires.

I go to the skating rink all the time and I watch these kids do all of these tricks and amazing things on skates and it’s not that they are all trained to do them, it’s that they are fearless in trying.  They don’t care if they fall because they’ll just get back up and try it again.  They don’t care if they don’t get it the first, second, or third time around, they will just keep going until they finally do get it.  Meanwhile the adults (myself included) are watching in awe, wishing that we could do just half of the things they are able to do instead of actually just going out and trying it.

If we could all just stop standing by and watching while everyone else is doing the things that we long to be doing then just imagine what we could do in this world, for our lives, for our children’s lives.  We keep limiting the things that we can do but should we be.  I mean obviously we can’t miraculously (by ourselves) make the world the better place that I’m sure we all desire it to be and yeah sure we can’t actually hold the whole world in the palm of our hands but why the hell can’t we at least try.

Perhaps we could try looking at obstacles and struggles from a child’s point of view; with unyielding faith and unstoppable determination.  Think about it this way, children seem to get everything that they want simply because they believe that they will.  So let’s try having a little more faith and a lot less wonder.  They more you keep wondering about whether or not something is going to happen, the more you are actually wondering away from the very thing that you want.  Don’t wonder away from your dreams, just have faith that they ARE going to come true.

I have the Write 2 Be Persistent and Determined… What is your Write 2 Be?

Jimmetta Carpenter

Writer/Editor

The Diary: Succession of Lies (Now Available)

Writing as “Jaycee Durant”

https://write-2-be.com/

http://unpleasantlyplump.wordpress.com/

http://www.facebook.com/people/Jimmetta-Carpenter/1069480310

 

Write 2 Be Magazine will be debuting on January 15th, 2013 so please go join the magazine on twitter before it debuts on https://twitter.com/write2bemag and join the email listing for the magazine at Write2bemagazine@yahoo.com.  Also please feel free to go and friend me on facebook at http://www.facebook.com/people/Jimmetta-Carpenter/1069480310 and like my Write 2 Be Magazine fan page.  Please help support my endeavor and my new journey and help me spread the word about Write 2 Be and its meaning.

What’s It Going to Take to Become a Media Mogul

jcladyluv

I’ve been thinking a lot over this past weekend about what it’s going to take to become the media mogul that I have always dreamed of being.  I know that it’s not going to be a piece of cake and frankly in the cases of most people it probably would have already happened by now.  Perhaps if I hadn’t spent so much time standing in my own way I’d already be halfway to that point by now.

But nevertheless, I am not there yet.  Largely due to the fact that I spent most of this year (a lot of years really) telling myself and convincing myself that I had took too long, and I had let too many opportunities pass me be, or that I didn’t have what it takes like Oprah or Tyler Perry and other impressive moguls (some still in the making) have, and that for those reasons it was just too late for me.  Ever since I heard that message that I watched by Bishop T.D. Jakes about opportunities presenting themselves in chaos and about not counting up all of the things that I didn’t have or that I couldn’t do instead of relying on what I do have, I have shifted my focus into a different place.

I plan on taking this year and focusing on the things I can control and the things and more importantly the opportunities that I do have.  There’s a reason why people say that it is never too late to accomplish your dream and I am going to stop telling myself that it is too late.  Of course I have a lot of ground to make up for and a lot of hard work to do but I have also realized something else.  I have to start paying closer attention to those media moguls that have essentially paved the way and laid the ground work for those that will come behind them (I will be one of those people).

So this week I wanted to share with all of you some of the media moguls (and one’s in the making) that I admire and some lessons that I’ve taken away from them that can help propel the next generation of media moguls to come.  Tomorrow I will share with you what I admire most about Tyler Perry and the lessons from his journey.

I have the Write 2 Be Motivating and Inspiring… What is your Write 2 Be?

Jimmetta Carpenter

Writer/Editor

The Diary: Succession of Lies (Now Available)

Writing as “Jaycee Durant”

https://write-2-be.com/

http://unpleasantlyplump.wordpress.com/

http://www.facebook.com/people/Jimmetta-Carpenter/1069480310

Write 2 Be Magazine will be debuting on January 15th, 2013 so please go join the magazine on twitter before it debuts on https://twitter.com/write2bemag and join the email listing for the magazine at Write2bemagazine@yahoo.com.  Also please feel free to go and friend me on facebook at http://www.facebook.com/people/Jimmetta-Carpenter/1069480310 and like my Write 2 Be Magazine fan page.  Please help support my endeavor and my new journey and help me spread the word about Write 2 Be and its meaning.

NaNoWriMo Day # 2: Let the Nay-Sayers in the Crowd Fuel Your Drive

jcladyluv

So this may be the day where you have one of your so-called friends (you’ll understand why I say so-called in just a second) call you up just as you’re sitting down to write and say “so you were serious about doing that?  What do you really expect to get out of this?”  This is when you shoot them a look through the phone (as if they can actually see you) and say “of course I’m serious, I take my writing very seriously and what I expect to get out of this is a first draft of a book that will one day be on someone’s best-seller’s list” (sorry I’m projecting my response) and you ask them as politely as possible why they would say something so negative to you.

This is the friend that either has no ambition themselves and doesn’t understand a thing about setting goals and sticking to them, or they are simply jealous that they don’t have the same drive that you do for something that they wish they could be doing.  Either way, it’s not the support you really need during the month of November as you complete your first draft.  OR IS IT?

We all know that it is wonderful to have the positive people around you, supporting you, rooting for your success every step of the way.  But what we may take for granted is how it is just as important to have those people who don’t believe in you and who are rooting for you to fail as a motivation as well.  That in now way means that you convince yourself to listen to those nay-sayers because they are wrong for not believing in you and they are wrong to doubt you (and when you do hit the New York Times Best-Seller’s list they will really be kicking themselves) but let their discouragement be your motivation.

Let it be the fuel for you to get up early in the morning (or whatever your designated time to write is) and write those words everyday.  Let it drive you, if nothing else, to prove them wrong.  And when November 30th gets here you will have the satisfaction of knowing that not only do you have a new novel in the works to edit but that you can also be satisfied that you never gave up like your non-supporters all thought you would.  Keep going and forget what anyone else has to say!

 

Jimmetta Carpenter

Writer/Editor

The Diary: Succession of Lies (Now Available)

Writing as “Jaycee Durant”

https://write-2-be.com/

http://unpleasantlyplump.wordpress.com/

http://www.facebook.com/people/Jimmetta-Carpenter/1069480310

http://www.passionatewriterpublishing.com/thediary.htm

www.lulu.com/ladybugpress

NaNoWriMo Day # 1: Don’t Turn and Run, You Can Actually Do This!

jcladyluv

Okay so it’s Day 1 of National Novel Writing Month.  Even though it’s only the first day you are already thinking “what in the world did I get myself into here?”  You are re-thinking the whole idea and pondering what the point of it all is.

Thoughts of doubt are starting to seep in and you are beginning to realize just how many words 50,000 is and the time you will have to invest to get it done.  For those of you who have never done this before you may be starting to realize just how hard it really is to write a novel.

Coming from someone who has had all of these thoughts racing through their head before, and all at once, from the times I have done NaNoWriMo before, I’m here to tell you DON’T LISTEN TO THOSE VOICES!  Those are the voices that are trying to get you to give up before you even begin.  I know it seems like it can’t be done and like there is no point to all of this but it just isn’t true.  The point is that your novel is closer to being done then it was before you started.

No matter what you’re inner critic is telling you, you can’t listen.  You Can Do This.  Hang in there, it does get easier.  Soon (maybe even tomorrow) you will start to fall in love with your story as well as your characters and the plot will be all you can think about.  Don’t run away from your story now, it needs you to convey it to the rest of the world!

 

Jimmetta Carpenter

Writer/Editor

The Diary: Succession of Lies (Now Available)

Writing as “Jaycee Durant”

https://write-2-be.com/

http://unpleasantlyplump.wordpress.com/

http://www.facebook.com/people/Jimmetta-Carpenter/1069480310

http://www.passionatewriterpublishing.com/thediary.htm

www.lulu.com/ladybugpress