Tag: journey

What Could Have Been

jcladyluv

“You can clutch the past so tightly to your chest that it leaves your arms too full to embrace the present.” 

~Jan Glidewell 

The other night I was talking to Ms. L and I was feeling a little down because I had a lot of things on my mind.  I was thinking of all the curveballs that I have been thrown in life.  I was doing a lot of wondering about what could have been.  

What if I had done what I was supposed to do all the way through high school and had been able to get a full scholarship to the college of my choice inNew York?  What if when I did go to college, not necessarily the one that I wanted to go to, and I had been better prepared for college life and had gotten the grades that I should’ve gotten or at least sought help when I was failing?  What if I hadn’t gotten in a really bad relationship and gotten so steered off course from what my vision of my life was?  What if I hadn’t met a man who I thought was the love of my life and had a child with him which derailed me going back to school until the late age of 27?  

The truth is my life would more than likely be at a very different place, maybe even where I envisioned it being.  Had I done all the things that I should’ve done in the correct time frame that it should have been done in I may very well already be into my writing career and perhaps even a lot closer to the top of that media mogul ladder that I am now struggling to climb.  But in talking to Ms. L. the other night she helped me to see that everything does in fact happen for a reason and that just because the course of my journey has had to change, the vision has always remained the same and that’s what matters the most.  

If I had never been directed to Morgan State University (which was not the school I had always wanted to attend) then I would’ve never met Ms. L. and I can not imagine going through this life without a friend as good as her and as supportive and motivating as her.  If I hadn’t met the man who I thought was the love of my life, then I would not have my amazing daughter and I can not even begin to say how thankful I am for her and I wouldn’t trade her for all the money and success in the world.  

So many of the things that I have been through are responsible for shaping the person I am today.  But in all of that my vision of what I wanted in terms of my career goals and what I feel God put me on this earth to do have never changed.  I have never questioned what I am meant to do.  Now I may not have answered all of the previous doors that opportunity was knocking at, and looking back perhaps those doors were not meant for me to answer, but I certainly believe that there are still more opportunities out there that I may just have to build my own door to.  

What could have been in anyone’s life is not always how things should’ve been and I firmly believe that God knows your path before you even develop a path in your own mind.  So who am I to question what could have been when God already has a plan for what will be and the least that I can do, after all he has seen me through and all the talents and abilities that he has blessed me with, is follow the path that he has mapped out for me, not the one that I had mapped out for myself.  Until next time…Don’t get sidetracked by the curveballs, just change your plan of how to attack them the next time you’re up to bat!

 

Jimmetta Carpenter

Writer/Editor

The Diary: Succession of Lies (Now Available)

Writing as “Jaycee Durant”

https://writetobe.wordpress.com/

http://unpleasantlyplump.wordpress.com/

http://www.facebook.com/people/Jimmetta-Carpenter/1069480310

http://www.passionatewriterpublishing.com/thediary.htm

www.lulu.com/ladybugpress

The Best You

jcladyluv

“The best way to get approval is not to need it!  Focus on being the best you and the rest will take care of itself.”

~Chris Gardner 

It is natural for people to want to seek approval from others.  More often than not it is of the one’s that are immediately around you, like your friends and family.  We want them to accept us and to be proud of us and to support us in our endeavors and always encourage our ambitions.  When we don’t get that support and that approval, especially from family, we are crushed.  

As hard as we may try to hide it and act as if it doesn’t really matter that they don’t get our goals and that they don’t approve of the path we chose, it matters.  It begins to feel like if the one’s you love and are supposed to be able to look to for support can’t be there for you then everyone must be against you.  However, the problem isn’t them for not approving the goals we put forth; the problem is us for depending on the approval of anyone but ourselves to begin with. 

On the journey towards being successful in our dreams and or passions the focus has to be us; what we think, what we approve of, and what we demand of ourselves.  At some point we are going to have to realize that seeking the approval of anyone else is only going to be our downfall.  People spend so much time trying to do what others expect of them and trying to be perfect in order to fit someone else’s standards.  What they should be focused on is meeting their own standards and not so much on being perfect but on being the best that they can be for themselves.  

Trying to be what everyone else wants you to be can become exhausting and it wastes entirely too much time and energy that can be better spent.  If the people around you are making you feel as if you aren’t meeting their expectations, then you need to reevaluate who it is that you are surrounding yourself with and if they are really what you need to be focused on.  I know, easier said then done.  

It’s hard to let go of that need to be accepted and I know because I’m still working on the letting go part.  But I am starting to realize that all the time that I’ve wasted trying to seek approval and be accepted could’ve been time that went into actually accomplishing the very things that I sought approval for.  So today you should stop and ask yourselves, whose approval is that you really need?  Theirs, or your own.  Until next time…Be the best you that you can possibly be and everyone else will just have to follow suit!  

 

 

Jimmetta Carpenter

Writer/Editor

The Diary: Succession of Lies (Now Available)

Writing as “Jaycee Durant”

https://writetobe.wordpress.com/

http://unpleasantlyplump.wordpress.com/

http://www.facebook.com/people/Jimmetta-Carpenter/1069480310

http://www.passionatewriterpublishing.com/thediary.htm

www.lulu.com/ladybugpress

A Bad Case of How Did I Get Here

jcladyluv

“Many of life’s failures are people who had not realized how close they were to success when they gave up.”

~Thomas Edison 

So I was reading Ms. L’s blog post yesterday, “Bucket List”, and started thinking about all of the things that I might include on my own personal bucket list and if I was so courageous enough to make a list, just how many of those things would I actually be able to cross off.  

For the past few weeks I have been trying to not to be depressed over the state of my current circumstances, and I must say I have been losing that battle because it just seems like things keep getting worse.  I’ve been waking up day after day wondering how I got here at the age of 30 (almost 31) and still so far behind in my list of goals and accomplishments.  It’s like every time something goes right there are three more things that go wrong to completely demolish the one right thing that happened.  

I guess you could say that for a little while I lost my motivation for even trying to make things go my way.  I figured that if it was meant to happen for me it would’ve happened by now, right?  Well I have come back to my senses now and I am ready to get right back in the ring of life and fight for where I want my life to be.  I have had my share of what some might call luck and I have definitely had some miracles along the way and that has to count for something.  

So maybe I wouldn’t be able to check off even half of my list yet.  Maybe I am not quite there yet in succeeding in all of the aspects of life that I want to but I am not at square one either.  Even being in the middle of my journey means that I have accomplished something worth being proud of.  I may have quite a ways to go but stopping now is not an option that I am willing to explore.  

When I stop to think about how I got here, I have to think about where here actually is.  I am relatively healthy, I have a beautiful and healthy vibrant and incredibly smart daughter, I have the talent and ability to write which is what I’ve wanted to do since I was six years old, and I have the drive and determination to make it happen no matter what or how long it takes.  I guess when I sit back and think about it, being “here” isn’t really so bad. 

Jimmetta Carpenter

Writer/Editor

The Diary: Succession of Lies (Now Available)

Writing as “Jaycee Durant”

http://www.passionatewriterpublishing.com/thediary.htm
http://www.facebook.com/people/Jimmetta-Carpenter/1069480310

https://writetobe.wordpress.com/

http://jayceedurant.wordpress.com/

http://unpleasantlyplump.wordpress.com/

http://freemynd.wordpress.com/

http://spokenlikeaqueen.blogspot.com/ 

www.lulu.com/ladybugpress

www.authorsden.com/jimmettacarpenter

Staying the Course

jcladyluv

“When you feel like giving up, remember why you held on for so long in the first place.”

~ Unknown

 Often times in life while trying to strive toward our dreams and make them come true we tend to get off track and stray from the course.  We start to lose momentum and seem to forget what matters the most.  We lose focus and let other things and people become more important and change the direction in which we are going.    So when do we reprioritize our lists of goals and finally get focused enough to turn them into the reality that we want them to be?  

Apart of staying focused on moving forward with your future involves letting go of certain things from your past.  Sometimes we don’t realize that we tend to hold onto what hinders us the most because we like what feels familiar and comfortable.  In order to stay focused you have to be willing to put other things that are not conducive to you achieving your ultimate goal aside.  You have to come to the realization that whether we want them to or not people and circumstances do change and the people that we re-route our lives for may not be going in the same direction. 

How our life ends up depends on how driven we are to get what we want out of it.  However that involves knowing exactly what it is that you want and what it’s going to take to get there.  Being focused takes practice and action and the process begins in the mind.  Once you’ve set your goal than all that’s left is putting it in motion and if you act like you already have what you want you’ll feel as if you’ve already succeeded.  You have to have the confidence that you will attain your dreams because without that confidence you’ll start to let in the doubt.  

Being focused is a journey in which you have to keep learning and practicing along the way.  You’re directions and paths may change and you may even get sidetracked from time to time but you can’t get distracted when what you’ve always wanted could be right within your reach.  Its hard to just throw caution to the wind and toss out all of the things that are familiar to you but if you want to get the best out of your life than you have to take action every day because there’s no time to waste. Actions speak louder than words, and nothing in life ever just happens. 

Jimmetta Carpenter

Writer/Editor

The Diary: Succession of Lies (Now Available)

Writing as “Jaycee Durant”

http://www.passionatewriterpublishing.com/thediary.htm
http://www.facebook.com/people/Jimmetta-Carpenter/1069480310

https://writetobe.wordpress.com/

http://jayceedurant.wordpress.com/

http://unpleasantlyplump.wordpress.com/

http://freemynd.wordpress.com/

http://spokenlikeaqueen.blogspot.com/ 

www.lulu.com/ladybugpress

www.authorsden.com/jimmettacarpenter