Tag: Write 2 Be blog

What’s Your Motivation When the Odds Are Stacked Against You?

jcladyluv

I read a blog post the other day that asked the question ‘Is having something to prove a good enough reason to do something?’  When I read the post the blogger discussed how perhaps we should not use someone telling us that we can’t achieve something or someone’s negativity altogether to influence or motivate whether or not we in fact decide to go after what it is that we want.  She stated that people pleasing was something not to get caught up in.  Initially I felt that she might have a point to that statement and that people’s sheer passion for doing something should be enough to ‘just do it’ and that it shouldn’t take someone else telling us no or rejecting our passion for us to go at it full force.  

But then I realized something.  Isn’t that the nature of how dreams are realized, and how businesses are built, and how people are made to be successful?  I mean of course you dream something and naturally you want to achieve that dream no matter what and when you start a business you hopefully are starting that business because it is something that you’ve always wanted to do.  But if you listen to a lot of successful people talk about how they got there and how they accomplished their dreams and started their businesses, a lot of it had something to do with what someone told them they would never be able to do.  

Think of how many singers and film stars were told no, and how many times they were told no, and how many people even told them that they were crazy to think they would ever really make it.  Now think about how that just fired them up to going after that dream with even more force and more drive.  Think about Tyler Perry and Oprah Winfrey and Steve Jobs, and Bill Gates and how many people told them they would never make it and that they would never see their dreams become a reality and how those words must have fueled the fire that was already lit underneath them.  

I remember hearing an interview once about an entrepreneur going after their dream and starting their own company (can’t quite remember who at this exact moment) and when they were asked what made them go after their goal when all of the odds were stacked against them, their response was simply ‘someone told me I couldn’t have it’.  It’s amazing what someone telling you NO will do for your drive and ambition to prove them wrong and get what you want in spite of all the odds stacked against you.  I hate to be told NO but if I really think about it, when I do get to where I want to be in life, those No’s will be what made me so fiercely determined to prove everyone who said I couldn’t do it wrong.  

 

Jimmetta Carpenter

Writer/Editor

The Diary: Succession of Lies (Now Available)

Writing as “Jaycee Durant”

https://write-2-be.com/

http://unpleasantlyplump.wordpress.com/

http://www.facebook.com/people/Jimmetta-Carpenter/1069480310

http://www.passionatewriterpublishing.com/thediary.htm

www.lulu.com/ladybugpress

Could Reality TV Be the Next Best Marketing Strategy?

jcladyluv

The other night Ms. L. and I were talking about reality television.  You know the usual, what train wrecks are worth watching and what is just simply too much drama even for us.  We both talked about how we are not really ‘Reality TV show watchers’ even though there were some that had managed to reel us in over a period of time.  I’ll give Ms. L. credit in the fact that she hasn’t been as reeled in as I have.  

There was a time that if the caption about the TV show said reality I would instantly turn away and wouldn’t even give it a second look.  But then I realized something that I think some people still have not caught onto yet.  Reality TV is not truly Reality.  I mean think about it, they have writers on Reality TV shows (why if the show is in fact unscripted as they try to convince us).  Not only that but there is a whole lot of editing film to make the show’s end result look just real enough to not look like most other television shows and yet still fake enough to know that this much drama could not possibly happen this often to this person.  

But the reality shows that I truly love the most are the one’s with a purpose at the end of it.  You know, the competition one’s like America’s Next Top Model, Hell’s Kitchen, Master Chef, HGTV Design Star, Food Network Star, those types of shows.  However, I have been thinking a lot lately about what a Reality TV show can do for a person who might be trying to make a name for themselves and isn’t having much luck at getting their name out there.  If you think about it, these people (you know, the one’s who are at the center of all the drama) are actually smarter then we give them credit for.  

Let’s take Snookie from Jersey Shore for example.  If she ever decides to stop boozing it up and grows up (hopefully before her child gets here) and she decided that she wanted to start a new business, she doesn’t have to worry about getting her name out there, it already is.  Everyone and anyone knows who she is and like her or hate her, she has made probably millions off of the drama that she is the center of.  She could literally forge any type of career she wants all because of her stints on reality TV.  

It just makes you wonder, just how easy could it be for any one of us to make the name for ourselves that we want.  I’m in no way, shape, or form, interested in ever being a part of a reality show (not that I think anyway) but that is largely in part because I care way too much about what people think of me.  But if I had the nerve, I can’t say that it wouldn’t be a consideration.  Hell these days with the new phenomenon of web series on YouTube you could really start your own.  I mean personally I think that there are way more talented people out here then the Snookies and Kardasians of the world that could stand to make a name for themselves.  Reality could be the next new way that people can market and brand themselves and become the household name that they want to be.  Would you ever consider starting or being a part of a reality show so everyone can know your name? 

 

Jimmetta Carpenter

Writer/Editor

The Diary: Succession of Lies (Now Available)

Writing as “Jaycee Durant”

https://write-2-be.com/

http://unpleasantlyplump.wordpress.com/

http://www.facebook.com/people/Jimmetta-Carpenter/1069480310

http://www.passionatewriterpublishing.com/thediary.htm

www.lulu.com/ladybugpress

Too Many Stories to Juggle, Not Enough Discipline To Keep Them All From Falling

jcladyluv

It’s starting to happen again.  All of these different ideas and characters are circling around inside my head and trying to tell me all of their stories, ALL at once.  Now I know what many writers may possibly be thinking.  How could this possibly be a problem?  In fact a lot of writers have the opposite problem, no ideas and no characters speaking to them.  

Well the problem that presents itself is that I have yet to finish the novel that I started writing last November for National Novel Writing Month.  I have no idea why I haven’t because it’s not as if I’ve lost interest in telling the stories of those characters.  In fact I am very intrigued to see if the main character in that novel will end up how I once thought she might end up.  It’s not as if she hasn’t been begging me to finish telling her story either, in fact I think she may just have some adjustments that could change a lot of what was going to happen.  

My problem is that I am a serial story hopper.  It’s not that I have never finished a novel.  In fact I am actually a published author (although you wouldn’t know it due to my inability to do a better job at marketing myself—yet another thing I must work on sooner rather than later).  I actually have another novel that is also completed that is currently in the hands of my editor now.  However, if you had any idea of the novels I have already started and stopped because I had another story enter my head and another character that kept shouting at me to tell it, you would probably laugh at my lack of discipline.  

That’s what it is, a lack of discipline to stick with one story from start to finish.  But how do you silence the characters that come to you in the midst of telling another character’s story that has nothing to do with theirs?  I mean you can’t completely ignore the ideas that come because if you lose them you might never get them back again.  On the other hand feeding into the constantly flowing stream of ideas is the reason why I have at least 5 or 6 novels started but left unfinished.  

I read one article that suggested writing down the ideas as they come and then setting them aside to finish the current project.  The problem I have with that idea is that once I get started writing that idea out, then I start sketching the characters, then I start to outline the story and the setting.  Next thing you know I’ve moved completely from one story to the next.  So what am I going to do about it?  

Well it seems that when I knew I was under the pressure of National Novel Writing Month I had no problem sticking to my one story.  So NaNoWriMo is having this thing they call CampNaNoWriMo where they do the same thing they do in November, just in June and August as well.  Since I’ve already missed June’s, I am going to do the one that they have in August.  

Technically you are supposed to start a new novel from scratch but I think that I am going to use the one in August to finish the one I started last November.  Perhaps that will give me some focus and discipline and then I can finally complete this novel before moving on to the next one.  Who knows, I might just finish this one and move on to another one that I already started earlier and finish that one up too.  Discipline is extremely key to a writer’s work because without it you would just be all over the place with more stories going on than any one person can handle.  Kind of like me! 

 

Jimmetta Carpenter

Writer/Editor

The Diary: Succession of Lies (Now Available)

Writing as “Jaycee Durant”

https://write-2-be.com/

http://unpleasantlyplump.wordpress.com/

http://www.facebook.com/people/Jimmetta-Carpenter/1069480310

http://www.passionatewriterpublishing.com/thediary.htm

www.lulu.com/ladybugpress

It’s Either Fear Or Success, It Can’t Be Both

jcladyluv

Seek to understand whatever you’re afraid of.  That was one of the messages in a video message that I got in my email as being a part of the Tyler Perry Mailing list.  He had a huge fear of flying so he sought out to learn everything that he could about airplanes and eventually became a pilot and started flying his own planes.  Not only did he conquer and overcome his fear, but he took fear and rose above that fear (or should I say flew above it).  

So I was sitting here trying to figure out what I was most afraid of.  You know, not the little things like being afraid of bugs, or heights (which is not really a little thing because I am greatly afraid of heights), but the things that will halt me in my tracks of wherever it is I’m trying to go.  I can’t really do much at this present moment in my life about my fear of being on a stage and doing any type of public speaking (which I truly believed kept me from ever pursuing a singing or acting career).  But there is a fear that I do still have time to do something about.  

I don’t know if you would characterize it as a fear of failure or a fear of actually succeeding, but either way that you phrase it, it is a huge problem.  On the one hand there’s the part of me that would be devastated at giving it my absolute best, a hundred percent, and falling flat on my face, and on the other hand there is the part of me that is afraid that if I do give it my absolute best and I do succeed, then what happens if I can’t keep it up.  I know what you’re all thinking.  Nothing is ever going to go completely smooth all the time so that even if I do succeed then there is bound to be some down moments but it is the down moments that have me stuck, or rather the fear of them.  

I’ve started to take a look at a lot of the business people, and writers, and moguls that I admire and aspire to learn from and as any of you might have guessed, Tyler Perry is definitely at the top of that list for me.  He has proven that you can come from not so humble beginnings, and suffer horrendous things in your life and that even when no one else believes in you that you believing in you can really be enough.  I’m never disappointed when I get an email from Tyler Perry’s Mailing list because his message is always just what I needed to hear.  I guess there’s no way I can really succeed if I’m too busy being afraid to.  So it’s either I let the fear win out over the success, or I succeed in spite of the fear.  I really can’t have it both ways.        

 

Jimmetta Carpenter

Writer/Editor

The Diary: Succession of Lies (Now Available)

Writing as “Jaycee Durant”

https://write-2-be.com/

http://unpleasantlyplump.wordpress.com/

http://www.facebook.com/people/Jimmetta-Carpenter/1069480310

http://www.passionatewriterpublishing.com/thediary.htm

www.lulu.com/ladybugpress

The Lesson That A Cinematic Genius In the Making Has Taught Me

jcladyluv

I think that anyone who knows me knows that I don’t mind learning valuable lessons from children.  Sometimes the people who show us whether or not we are moving in the right direction or whether or not we’re just stuck standing still are the children that are a part of our lives, whether it be our own or someone else’s child.  

My best friend Ms. L has an 11 year old cinematic genius in the making.  It is amazing to think that at his young age he can make his own movies, cut and edit film, put together book trailers and produce graphic artwork as if it were as easy as breathing.  He is truly a gifted little boy and Ms. L told me last night that he has finally decided that he wants to make a go of it as a real official business so that he can make the money he needs to afford the more high tech things that he needs to go even further in his adventures of film making.  

I mean it shouldn’t come as a surprise that he’s so talented because his mom is essentially the most gifted writer that I know.  What amazes me even more is the fact that in one night he managed to make this decision, create him a website (a freebie one—he is a kid after all), create business cards and rehearse his spiel that would land him his first of many clients (which he got the next day by the way).  In one night.  I am 32 and have been working at making my dream a reality for the last decade or so and I am still not as far along as I should be.  It really made me (and Ms. L too) think ‘what the hell am I doing and why am I wasting so much time?’  

I keep getting in my own way, so much so that I’m sometimes not even able to recognize that that is what I am doing.  I tell myself that I will get rejected for an article before I even bother to try sending it off.  I tell myself that no one will like the story or characters I have created before actually giving it a real shot.  I constantly tell myself all of the reasons why I can’t do something without seeing the most important reason why I can, because it was something that I was meant to do.  

I believe that everyone is talented at something and even if there are a hundred writers out there who are just as talented as I am, it is only me who can write the stories that I was meant to write and who can tell them in only the way that I can.  I’m no Maya Angelou, or Terry McMillan, or Alice Walker, but I am Jimmetta Carpenter and just as I can not write the way that they do, they can not write the way that I do either.  

Ms. L.’s son has so much belief in himself that he is not letting the fact that he’s 11 and has no real money of his own to fund his business stop him.  He’s just diving right in and handling whatever hiccups happen along the way.  My God if an 11 year old can have that frame of mind about his business then why on earth can’t I.  My best friend’s son doesn’t realize the lesson that his leap of faith has taught me but one day he will realize that he just showed me that the only person that is really in my way, is me.  

 

Jimmetta Carpenter

Writer/Editor

The Diary: Succession of Lies (Now Available)

Writing as “Jaycee Durant”

https://write-2-be.com/

http://unpleasantlyplump.wordpress.com/

http://www.facebook.com/people/Jimmetta-Carpenter/1069480310

http://www.passionatewriterpublishing.com/thediary.htm

www.lulu.com/ladybugpress

Maybe Things Would Have Been Better If…

jcladyluv

Often times I wonder (too often to actually count) if I made the right decision by choosing not to go back into the traditional work force as most single parents do and make that steady and stable income every other week.  I mean let’s face it, it’s not as if I have hit it big or anything and if I want to get real honest I am not doing as well in my writing career as I thought I would be by now, or that I know I should be doing.  

I think of all the things I want to buy for my daughter and the activities that I would like to put her in to enhance her creative nature that I just can’t afford right now and I wonder what the hell am I doing and I constantly wonder am I completely screwing her life up by not just accepting the fact that this just isn’t working and maybe it’s just not for me.  I mean it’s not like it wouldn’t be nice to have a steady and predictable stream of income coming in that I know I can count on.  

But then yesterday morning as I was getting my daughter ready for daycare (it acts as a camp during the summer) she said ‘thank you mommy’.  I asked her what she was thanking me for and she replied ‘for taking such good care of me’.  She said that I am always there when she needs me.  She almost brought me to tears and I was so touched.  She made me feel like the choice not to go back to a traditional job and stay home with her, all while still pursuing my dreams of making what I love to do my career, was totally worth it.  Yesterday, just her appreciation of me, let me know that it was the right decision, for me anyway.  

It is all the more motivation to let me know that I have to have less moments of procrastination and more moments of productivity because I have to make this work, I have to do what I know in my heart I was meant to do.  Not just because I love doing it and it is my passion, but because being able to write and become more successful at it makes moments like yesterday with my daughter even more possible.  

It would make it more of a certainty that I will continue to always be here when she needs me and that I will always take very good care of her.  More importantly it will show her that you can go after your dreams and make it work even though everyone else around you may be telling you that you’re crazy for ever thinking this could work and to be more realistic.  I want her to not be afraid to go after her dreams and to not have to think that going after her dreams is going to do more harm then good.  

So in an effort to procrastinate less and produce more, I am going to make it a point to accomplish at least three things every week (3 is a nice workable number) to get me further along in my writing career.  Whether it is actually working on my novel (which is still not finished) or just getting those query letters that I keep trying to make perfect sent out so someone can actually see them.  Even if it is just gathering research for a particular project, that is still working towards the end goal of finishing that project.  I think that is a goal that I can work with and actually stick to.  

Until I do make things happen the way that I want them to, I have to work on tuning that voice in the back of my mind that questions if things would’ve been better if I had made another choice.  Fact of the matter is that I will never know the answer to that because I chose to do me and not what someone else might have thought I should do.  I’m certainly not going to become the success that I want to be by doing what everyone else thinks I should.       

 

Jimmetta Carpenter

Writer/Editor

The Diary: Succession of Lies (Now Available)

Writing as “Jaycee Durant”

https://write-2-be.com/

http://unpleasantlyplump.wordpress.com/

http://www.facebook.com/people/Jimmetta-Carpenter/1069480310

http://www.passionatewriterpublishing.com/thediary.htm

www.lulu.com/ladybugpress

Even With Good Intentions There Are Still Distractions

jcladyluv

Good intention without the action to back it up is just that, intention.  There’s no real follow through involved in the things that you intend to get done, just a lot of wishing you had actually accomplished your task.  I had a plan this morning to get all of this work done on a couple of my projects and I even went to the great lengths of bringing my notebooks and my laptop out into the dining room where the T.V. was not on to distract me (I have a T.V. in the living room but the only one who really watches that one is my daughter).  

I tore myself away from one distraction only to be plagued with a lot of emotions and thoughts running through my mind about some personal stuff that lead to me calling Ms. L. to talk, thus diverting my attention away from all of the work that I had intended to get done.  The conversation that I had was good, don’t get me wrong, and it was something that I needed to talk out with someone (since I can’t really talk them out with the person that I really needed to talk them out with), but it gave me another excuse to use for not getting any writing done.  

I suppose that one could say that talking out what was going on in my head did in some way help me get something done.  If I hadn’t I would still be sitting here, staring at a blank computer screen with a bunch of unnecessary thoughts running through my mind (that have nothing to do with any project I’m working on), and I would become completely blocked.  In addition, I wouldn’t have had the opportunity of writing this particular blog post.  

Sometimes what appears as us being unproductive can help us break through those walls that are blocking us from our greatest potential.  I guess the good intentions that you don’t always manage to follow through on just might lead to something else that was intended to work out better for you in the long run.    

 

Jimmetta Carpenter

Writer/Editor

The Diary: Succession of Lies (Now Available)

Writing as “Jaycee Durant”

https://write-2-be.com/

http://unpleasantlyplump.wordpress.com/

http://www.facebook.com/people/Jimmetta-Carpenter/1069480310

http://www.passionatewriterpublishing.com/thediary.htm

www.lulu.com/ladybugpress 

I Don’t Like Looking At the Empty Calendar Squares

jcladyluv

I don’t like it when I feel a touch of envy.  Not a bad envy (although I’m not really sure there is a good kind of envy) but the kind of envy that motivates you into actually doing something.  Now you might be wondering, if it motivates me to get going again, then why wouldn’t I like it? 

It can never be a bad thing to get re-motivated to do something that you know you should already be doing.  That’s just it right there.  I don’t like it because it’s something that I already know in the back of my mind, that I should be doing as it is and that I shouldn’t have to watch or read about other people doing it to get moving in that direction.  

I was reading some other bloggers posts as I was doing some research for a project, and I kept reading about other writers having such busy schedules.  Talk about going to conferences, and doing book signings, and interviews, and things of that nature; the things that I feel like I should be out there doing too.  

It’s not as if I wouldn’t like to have a full calendar and to have to tell people that I have this book signing to do, or that conference to speak at, or this interview to give.  In fact every year when I buy those desk calendars or day planners I can see in my mind the pages, one after the other, full of appointments and deadlines that just can’t be missed.  And yet year after year those pages have gone blank, left unfilled, and more time passes.  

I guess the only thing left to really figure out is when I am going to get around to filling those pages up.  I suppose I would have to finish filling up the pages of the rest of my novel that is still undone, or finish one of the other projects that I am working on.  It’s not easy to have those blank squares on the calendar taunting me with missed opportunities.  

 

Jimmetta Carpenter

Writer/Editor

The Diary: Succession of Lies (Now Available)

Writing as “Jaycee Durant”

https://write-2-be.com/

http://unpleasantlyplump.wordpress.com/

http://www.facebook.com/people/Jimmetta-Carpenter/1069480310

http://www.passionatewriterpublishing.com/thediary.htm

www.lulu.com/ladybugpress

From One Struggling Writer to the Rest Who Think They Are Struggling Alone

jcladyluv

Sometime last week (it may have been the week before that) Ms. L sent me a link to a blog post titled Don’t Break the Chain by a wonderful blogger named Catherine Ryan Howard who I am now following (and you all should be too).  Ms. L knows I have been struggling with finding the time to write and work on all things related to my writing business so she thought that this would be helpful.  Well as usual, Ms. L always knows just what I need to read (and hear) to get me jump started again.  Of course it helped to know that this post also helped Ms. L as well because I knew that I was not alone in my struggles to be productive in my writing efforts.  

Well the blog post talked about many things in regards to one being more productive but more importantly it gave the idea of marking off days on a calendar with a red X for every day that you have accomplished your daily writing goals, whether it be actually writing or working on the business side of your writing career, and of course after so many days of seeing a chain of red X’s you get into the mode of not wanting to break that chain and having to see those X’s stare you in the face everyday becomes an incentive to actually get things done. 

Well there is a website that helps with that, for those of us who don’t want to go out and buy a huge wall calendar to mark down the days.  The website (once you register) will allow you to mark each day with a red square for every day that you have achieved your daily goals and you can even create other chains for you business efforts or whatever other goals you want to set.  I signed up (almost immediately) and have found it to be extremely helpful.  

I have actually been getting things done because I simply just don’t want to break the chains that I have created for myself.  Who knew something so simple as marking off days on a calendar could be so helpful in keeping me focused and making me produce more work.  I hope that any of you out there who is struggling with this very same issue clicks on the links to the websites and gets started on their road to becoming more productive.   

 

Jimmetta Carpenter

Writer/Editor

The Diary: Succession of Lies (Now Available)

Writing as “Jaycee Durant”

https://write-2-be.com/

http://unpleasantlyplump.wordpress.com/

http://www.facebook.com/people/Jimmetta-Carpenter/1069480310

http://www.passionatewriterpublishing.com/thediary.htm

www.lulu.com/ladybugpress

Is the Fighter Still in There Somewhere?

jcladyluv

I was sitting here wondering what to write about tonight?  Honestly right now all I feel is a sense of loss.  No, no one in my family or close to me died but in some ways I am wondering if the best part of me did.  I was just asking my best friend Ms. L. last night whether or not she remembered the times when she would call me and I would rush her off the phone telling her that ‘I have to call you back because I’m writing and I have to get this out’.  She said that she remembered that very well.  I asked her where did that person go and she simply responded, ‘she’ll be back’.  

For as long as I could remember I have wanted to be a writer and have books upon books out on shelves and change the world with my words.  But that wasn’t all that I had hoped for.  I wanted to be immersed in creativity from singing and acting and even dancing.  More importantly I wanted to be a symbol for why the arts and creativity is so necessary in this world.  

I don’t know whether I just got so bogged down by the many people that were in my life telling me that I couldn’t do what I always felt I was meant to do.  I don’t know if I just got tired of being rejected and not having the resources I needed to make my dreams a reality.  I don’t know if there’s just some part of me that just got tired of fighting for those dreams.  

As I sit here, still mentally thinking up ideas for my next story, I am still unable to finish the novel that I have been working on since the end of last year.  While I know there are tons of query letters that I need to send out to agents for the second novel I have already done (which is with my editor), I can’t seem to craft the perfect one to send out.  Although I have dozens of ideas for articles to write and even articles that I’ve already written that I need to write query letters for, I still find myself scared that the query letters won’t be perfect enough to get accepted.  

So what happened to the fighter that I had in me ready to do whatever it took?  What happened to the person who was prepared to stay up however long it took to get the work done?  What happened to that person who, when she didn’t have what she needed, made up the resources where there weren’t any, just to fulfill her purpose?  I know that she’s still in there somewhere.  I just don’t know where the fight in me went.  

What I do know is that the passion is still there.  The desire is still there.  I still wake up with stories in my head and new ideas for the stories I have yet to finish.  I still mentally am working on my vision for my media and publishing company.  I am still dreaming up ideas for the creativity camp that I want to create for kids so that they understand just how important the arts are to have in their lives.  I know that my dreams haven’t changed and they haven’t faded away.  I just need to dig that fighter in me back out. 

 

Jimmetta Carpenter

Writer/Editor

The Diary: Succession of Lies (Now Available)

Writing as “Jaycee Durant”

https://write-2-be.com/

http://unpleasantlyplump.wordpress.com/

http://www.facebook.com/people/Jimmetta-Carpenter/1069480310

http://www.passionatewriterpublishing.com/thediary.htm

www.lulu.com/ladybugpress