Tag: Fear

What a Better Writer I Will Be…

jcladyluv

As the New Year approaches I become a little more anxious for the year to come.  Not necessarily because I think that something miraculous will happen (one can still hope though) but because I am going into the year more focused on what needs to be done, and more importantly on what I have to do to get those things done.  One thing is for sure, I could stand to become a much better writer because as a writer, your learning is never done.  Below I listed several things that I will plan on doing in the year 2013 to become a better writer and maybe some of these things can be things that help some of you as well.

1.)    Write Every Day— I know that there are some that would argue that you should never force yourself to write if you are not feeling “the muse” to write.  However, I believe that writing everyday is important in becoming a more effective and insightful writer.  It’s just like a regular job.  You can’t wake up and just say I don’t feel like going so I’m not going to go.  This is my job and I will make a stronger effort in the New Year to treat it as such.

2.)    Read Every Day— Okay lately I have not been the avid reader that I once was and that I still would like to be.  There’s been this reason, or that reason, why I haven’t been able to plant my but in a chair and read, but really there’s no valid excuse.  I know that reading more makes an even stronger writer.  So in this year I am going to not only make a promise to just read more, but rather to read everyday.  Whether it’s just a couple of pages, or even just a page, so long as I read.

3.)    Share My Writing More— I’ve always been apprehensive about joining a writing critique group or any type of writing community.  It’s not that I haven’t but I just haven’t embraced the concept as much as I should have been.  So in my effort to make my writing better and stronger, I will share my work with others more this year.

4.)    Take Better Care of Myself— I am already learning that taking care of myself will make it even more possible for me to do those things that I strive to do in a successful way.  I feel myself becoming stronger as a person as I begin to place more priority in taking care of me, and that is making me an even stronger writer.  It also makes me a more confident writer.  I have to keep reminding myself to take better care of me so that in the long run I become stronger and more successful in everything else I want to do.

5.)    Don’t Let Writer’s Block Get In My Way— I have had my struggles with writer’s block in the past and I have allowed this to be the reason why things were not able to get done.  Because of that excuse, I have many novels started and not finished and many missed opportunities that I have let slip through my fingers.  I am not going to use this excuse anymore because it is just that, an excuse.  If I have to balance multiple projects so that if I get blocked on one project, I can simply move to the other project, then that’s what I am going to do.

6.)    Take a Writing Course— As a writer it is also important to keep the knowledge of the craft sharp.  This requires honing your craft more, not only by reading on the craft of writing, but also in taking a course on writing.  I would like to say that I can take several courses in the next year to be able to sharpen my writing skills, but realistically, I may not have the money for that.  But I think I can manage one course at the very least.

7.)    Research More— I have always loved research.  From historical events and historical figures, to the places in the world that I dream of traveling to.  I have to admit I haven’t done much of it in this past year but that’s what I want to get back to.

8.)    Become a Better Marketer of Myself— Okay I know that it doesn’t sound like this has anything to do with actually writing but if I’ve learned nothing else over the past year it is that if no one sees all of your hard work then you don’t get your writing noticed.  In order to get more of your writing out there for all to see I have to become better at marketing my writing myself, and my brand.  I admit I have A LOT of work to do in the area of marketing myself but it is definitely a focus for me in the year to come.

9.)    Attend Writer’s Conferences and Events— This goal may present some challenges because a lot of writer’s conferences and events these days are just not as affordable as they once were.  They actually used to have writing conferences that were free (go figure!) for those who, like me, just couldn’t afford it.  However, I am going to make an extra effort to at least make it possible to attend one at some point this coming year.

10.) Do Things That Scare Me— Fear is something that I struggle with so much.  There’s so many things that I haven’t done, simply out of fear.  So if I can do something that scares me, not just one thing, maybe something every month or every week, then perhaps I can learn to stop being so scared of things that I just can’t control.  Perhaps then I will actually achieve all that I want.

You won’t find too many writers who will say that they are at a point where they don’t need to learn more, do more, or be better than what they already are.  If you do they are either the greatest writer that has ever lived or they are fooling themselves.  We all get comfortable sometimes in the accomplishments that we have made and in how far we have already come.  Often times we forget that there is still so much more left to learn, and more left to do, and even further to go.  We grow as writers, when we acknowledge that we have a lot of growing left to do!

 

Jimmetta Carpenter

Writer/Editor

The Diary: Succession of Lies (Now Available)

Writing as “Jaycee Durant”

https://write-2-be.com/

http://unpleasantlyplump.wordpress.com/

http://www.facebook.com/people/Jimmetta-Carpenter/1069480310

The Writer That Doesn’t Put Themselves Out There Doesn’t Get Seen

jcladyluv

It is very hard to put yourself out there in any capacity, be it love or your career.  It stirs up feelings of fear of being rejected, not being good enough, not being accepted, not succeeding at your end goal, and even of how you will handle it if you do succeed.  Being a writer, you find yourself having to put yourself out there quite often, at least until you have put in enough hard work and effort to where the people you want to write for are finally coming to you.

It takes time to get to that point, where you are no longer the cat in the cat and mouse game of becoming successful at earning your income as a writer, and have finally become the mouse being sought after.  I used to wonder when I started trying to make a go at this, just how long do I have to keep putting myself all out there only to continually be rejected time and time again before someone comes looking for me.

I realize now, and frankly way too late, that in order to become and remain a successful writer, you can’t ever stop putting yourself out there.  Even more embarrassing and much to my deep regret, I have realized that I have wasted so much time feeling all of those fears and playing into them, that I haven’t actually been putting myself out there (not nearly as much as I should have been anyway) and I only have myself to blame for not being a household name by now.

The blame doesn’t fall on the editor’s and the people who haven’t accepted my wonderful words and given me that chance that I am dying to have in order to get into all of those national magazines that I want to be featured in.  I only have myself to blame for not completely putting myself out there.  They can’t accept what I am too afraid to submit.

A writer’s only way of becoming published, of becoming that success that we all dream about becoming, is to keep putting themselves out there.  No matter what the outcome, whether it is good or bad, they have to keep going for it, even when it seems impossible; especially when it seems to be impossible.  A fighter never wins the battle if they never fight to begin with.

 

Jimmetta Carpenter

Writer/Editor

The Diary: Succession of Lies (Now Available)

Writing as “Jaycee Durant”

https://write-2-be.com/

http://unpleasantlyplump.wordpress.com/

http://www.facebook.com/people/Jimmetta-Carpenter/1069480310

http://www.passionatewriterpublishing.com/thediary.htm

www.lulu.com/ladybugpress

Prayers for a Young Girl Who Never Let Fear Make Her Voice Silent

jcladyluv

It is sad to think of the people in this and other countries who are persecuted just for speaking out for what they believe in.  Just using your voice to speak out against something that you feel is unjust and you want to do everything in your power to change should be celebrated, not brutally retaliated against.

When 14 year old Malala Yousufzai began speaking out against the Taliban’s demand that schools for girls be shut down and that education to these girls be halted at the age of 11 she could have never imagined that she would be the target of assassins set to try and kill her.  She had been threatened for years but she never let that stop her from continuing to speak out publicly in favor of children’s rights in her country.  She once told someone in an interview that “if this new generation is not given pens, they will be given guns by terrorists.”

On Tuesday October 9th Malala Yousufzai was shot in the head while she was on her way to school.  She has had successful surgery to remove the bullet but is still in critical danger.  I am sending up many prayers for her and her family and it saddens me deeply that anyone would be harmed for wanting an education and for speaking out for all of the other young children that are too afraid to use their voice.

We take it for granted that we have the freedoms that we have here in the United States and that our children can go to school and we forget that in other countries they aren’t able to speak up for themselves and they don’t have the right to express themselves the way that we can.  What a courageous girl she was for not letting the fear that she felt for her life stop her from using her voice to speak out for what she believed was right.  If only we could all be so brave to never let fear silence us.

 

Jimmetta Carpenter

Writer/Editor

The Diary: Succession of Lies (Now Available)

Writing as “Jaycee Durant”

https://write-2-be.com/

http://unpleasantlyplump.wordpress.com/

http://www.facebook.com/people/Jimmetta-Carpenter/1069480310

http://www.passionatewriterpublishing.com/thediary.htm

www.lulu.com/ladybugpress

Trying to Be Perfect Does Not Always Amount to Perfection

jcladyluv

It is no secret to anyone who knows me that fear is something that I struggle with on a consistent basis.  Being afraid of failing has been something that has kept me from doing a lot of things that I have wanted to do.  Too often I have been afraid that I wasn’t good enough to make it, or good enough to even risk trying.

I guess it stems from my childhood being told by my mother on an almost daily basis that I was never going to be good enough.  After a while of hearing the same thing repeatedly from someone who is supposed to shape how you think and feel about yourself, you start to believe that it’s true.  It is that fear of not being good enough that has always made me feel that I couldn’t take certain risks if the preparation wasn’t perfect.

When it comes to query letters for articles, or pitching a novel to publishers or agents, or even sending out a resume to newspapers and magazines I want to work with or for, I have always held back if I didn’t feel that the package that I was sending off was perfect.  A lot of times this resulted in me taking months just to send one thing off.  Trying so hard to make everything perfect only really results in a lot of wasted time and lost opportunities.

It has taken until I was an adult with my own child for me to realize that those voices telling me that I wasn’t good enough were the voices that I needed to tune out.  That the voice that I should have been paying attention to all along was the voice within that whispered that not only was I good enough but that I was going to be greater than even I expected.

In a sense I have failed at being perfect because I’m not ever going to be perfect, and certainly not everything I do or write is going to meet the standards of perfection.  However, if I just continue being the best version of me that I can be, that is good enough.  It’s good enough for me.  It’s not always the loudest voices that deserve all the attention.  Sure they’re loud and extremely difficult to ignore but often times the loudness is just a distraction from the whispers of what we should really be listening to.

 

Jimmetta Carpenter

Writer/Editor

The Diary: Succession of Lies (Now Available)

Writing as “Jaycee Durant”

https://write-2-be.com/

http://unpleasantlyplump.wordpress.com/

http://www.facebook.com/people/Jimmetta-Carpenter/1069480310

http://www.passionatewriterpublishing.com/thediary.htm

www.lulu.com/ladybugpress

The Crutches That Keep Us From Healing

jcladyluv

I broke my foot when I was 19 years old.  I was attending MorganStateUniversity and it was during the winter when it had snowed and iced and as I was on my way to a class I slipped and fell and could not get up.  I had to be taken to the hospital and once examined, I had my foot put in a cast and given crutches and told to use them everyday for the appropriate healing time or else my foot would not be able to heal itself properly.  

For anyone who knows me, I am a hardheaded person who typically likes to formulate my own method of how things will wok better for me and needless to say I didn’t really use the crutches.  I tried to use them but they never felt like they actually gave me the support that they were supposed to give and they became more of a hindrance than actually helping me.  It would not be until years later that I realized that using those crutches properly as instructed would have saved me a lot of physical pain down the road.  

To this day I have problems with my foot (especially when it rains) and I know that with any body part that gets broken you are going to have problems but I think because my foot didn’t heal properly, it gave me extra problems.  We all have our own personal crutches in life.  There are ones that we are supposed to use that we don’t, there are the one’s that we use when we don’t need them, and then there are the ones that we use far longer than necessary and then on top of it we don’t use them effectively enough so that when we no longer have the crutches we are ill prepared for the journey without them.  

I have had a crutch for the last several years and it was one that was supposed to only be used to get me in a better position for what it is I really need to be doing.  That crutch was supposed to allow me time to get myself ready for when I no longer had them anymore.  I had been relying on that crutch for so long that not only had I not realized that I should have removed them a long time ago, but now because I didn’t use that crutch properly as they were supposed to be used, I am ill prepared for the journey without them.  The crutch that was supposed to end up helping me has now become the thing that has hindered me the most and without it I feel as if my world is literally crashing in on me.  

A week ago, I had so much school work with this Master’s program that seemed to be getting the better of me, and I was frustrated because not only did I not have the time to write (due to massive amounts of school work) but I also do not have the time to market and promote myself or query to bring the money in as a writer that I need to make.  A week ago I also had a crutch that I knew would be there, until it wasn’t anymore.  

So here I sit, with the crutches pulled out from under me abruptly, with no notice, and amazingly I am sitting here doing the research and working on querying, and thinking of the next project as well as how to complete the novel I am still working on so I can query that, and surprise of all surprises I can am still managing to get my homework done.  I seemed to have suddenly made the time that I needed to have all along.  

Now I’m not going to say that I am glad that the crutches were pulled out from underneath me without fair warning because I am not in a good place right now and at this moment I am not seeing how it is going to get any better as quickly as I need it to.  I can say that without those crutches, I have suddenly jumped into action.  I am getting things done even as I am typing this blog post that I thought I wasn’t able to make the time for.  

I can see now that those crutches were not helping me like I thought after all.   They were giving me an excuse not to take immediate action.  They were feeding the fear that I already had about whether or not I can make this work.  I thought that they were giving me a way to prepare when really they were keeping me from taking that giant leap of faith that I always thought I was taking.  

Most crutches do help us heal from whatever it is that is broken.  However, at some point we have to remember to remove those crutches when they are no longer needed because then all they are really doing is getting in the way.  I took too long to remove mine, don’t wait until it’s too late to remove yours.  

 

Jimmetta Carpenter

Writer/Editor

The Diary: Succession of Lies (Now Available)

Writing as “Jaycee Durant”

https://write-2-be.com/

http://unpleasantlyplump.wordpress.com/

http://www.facebook.com/people/Jimmetta-Carpenter/1069480310

http://www.passionatewriterpublishing.com/thediary.htm

www.lulu.com/ladybugpress

It’s Either Fear Or Success, It Can’t Be Both

jcladyluv

Seek to understand whatever you’re afraid of.  That was one of the messages in a video message that I got in my email as being a part of the Tyler Perry Mailing list.  He had a huge fear of flying so he sought out to learn everything that he could about airplanes and eventually became a pilot and started flying his own planes.  Not only did he conquer and overcome his fear, but he took fear and rose above that fear (or should I say flew above it).  

So I was sitting here trying to figure out what I was most afraid of.  You know, not the little things like being afraid of bugs, or heights (which is not really a little thing because I am greatly afraid of heights), but the things that will halt me in my tracks of wherever it is I’m trying to go.  I can’t really do much at this present moment in my life about my fear of being on a stage and doing any type of public speaking (which I truly believed kept me from ever pursuing a singing or acting career).  But there is a fear that I do still have time to do something about.  

I don’t know if you would characterize it as a fear of failure or a fear of actually succeeding, but either way that you phrase it, it is a huge problem.  On the one hand there’s the part of me that would be devastated at giving it my absolute best, a hundred percent, and falling flat on my face, and on the other hand there is the part of me that is afraid that if I do give it my absolute best and I do succeed, then what happens if I can’t keep it up.  I know what you’re all thinking.  Nothing is ever going to go completely smooth all the time so that even if I do succeed then there is bound to be some down moments but it is the down moments that have me stuck, or rather the fear of them.  

I’ve started to take a look at a lot of the business people, and writers, and moguls that I admire and aspire to learn from and as any of you might have guessed, Tyler Perry is definitely at the top of that list for me.  He has proven that you can come from not so humble beginnings, and suffer horrendous things in your life and that even when no one else believes in you that you believing in you can really be enough.  I’m never disappointed when I get an email from Tyler Perry’s Mailing list because his message is always just what I needed to hear.  I guess there’s no way I can really succeed if I’m too busy being afraid to.  So it’s either I let the fear win out over the success, or I succeed in spite of the fear.  I really can’t have it both ways.        

 

Jimmetta Carpenter

Writer/Editor

The Diary: Succession of Lies (Now Available)

Writing as “Jaycee Durant”

https://write-2-be.com/

http://unpleasantlyplump.wordpress.com/

http://www.facebook.com/people/Jimmetta-Carpenter/1069480310

http://www.passionatewriterpublishing.com/thediary.htm

www.lulu.com/ladybugpress

Is the Fighter Still in There Somewhere?

jcladyluv

I was sitting here wondering what to write about tonight?  Honestly right now all I feel is a sense of loss.  No, no one in my family or close to me died but in some ways I am wondering if the best part of me did.  I was just asking my best friend Ms. L. last night whether or not she remembered the times when she would call me and I would rush her off the phone telling her that ‘I have to call you back because I’m writing and I have to get this out’.  She said that she remembered that very well.  I asked her where did that person go and she simply responded, ‘she’ll be back’.  

For as long as I could remember I have wanted to be a writer and have books upon books out on shelves and change the world with my words.  But that wasn’t all that I had hoped for.  I wanted to be immersed in creativity from singing and acting and even dancing.  More importantly I wanted to be a symbol for why the arts and creativity is so necessary in this world.  

I don’t know whether I just got so bogged down by the many people that were in my life telling me that I couldn’t do what I always felt I was meant to do.  I don’t know if I just got tired of being rejected and not having the resources I needed to make my dreams a reality.  I don’t know if there’s just some part of me that just got tired of fighting for those dreams.  

As I sit here, still mentally thinking up ideas for my next story, I am still unable to finish the novel that I have been working on since the end of last year.  While I know there are tons of query letters that I need to send out to agents for the second novel I have already done (which is with my editor), I can’t seem to craft the perfect one to send out.  Although I have dozens of ideas for articles to write and even articles that I’ve already written that I need to write query letters for, I still find myself scared that the query letters won’t be perfect enough to get accepted.  

So what happened to the fighter that I had in me ready to do whatever it took?  What happened to the person who was prepared to stay up however long it took to get the work done?  What happened to that person who, when she didn’t have what she needed, made up the resources where there weren’t any, just to fulfill her purpose?  I know that she’s still in there somewhere.  I just don’t know where the fight in me went.  

What I do know is that the passion is still there.  The desire is still there.  I still wake up with stories in my head and new ideas for the stories I have yet to finish.  I still mentally am working on my vision for my media and publishing company.  I am still dreaming up ideas for the creativity camp that I want to create for kids so that they understand just how important the arts are to have in their lives.  I know that my dreams haven’t changed and they haven’t faded away.  I just need to dig that fighter in me back out. 

 

Jimmetta Carpenter

Writer/Editor

The Diary: Succession of Lies (Now Available)

Writing as “Jaycee Durant”

https://write-2-be.com/

http://unpleasantlyplump.wordpress.com/

http://www.facebook.com/people/Jimmetta-Carpenter/1069480310

http://www.passionatewriterpublishing.com/thediary.htm

www.lulu.com/ladybugpress

Who’s Still Afraid of Rejection? Oh Yeah, That Would Be Me

jcladyluv

“Believe in yourself and in your own voice, because there will be times in this business when you will be the only one who does. Take heart from the knowledge that an author with a strong voice will often have trouble at the start of his or her career because strong, distinctive voices sometimes make editors nervous. But in the end, only the strong survive.”

~Jayne Ann Krentz 

Yes, I said it.  As much as I try to convince others not to be afraid to go after what they want for their dreams and to not always be afraid that someone is going to say no, I have not yet been able to take my own advice.  But isn’t that how it always goes?  You tell someone to go for it, don’t be afraid, go big or go home, and all of those other motivating and encouraging things you say to your friends, that you whole heartedly mean when you’re saying them, yet somehow you still can’t apply that rule of thumb to you and your life’s dreams.  

I can’t seem to move out of my own damn way.  I keep putting it on my to do lists that I have to get these query letters to these national magazines that I’ve been dying to see my writing in, or the query letters to this list of agents that I want to possibly represent me, and yet when I go to type up the letters, or even just a simple letter of introduction, I get so caught up in trying to make them perfect.  I’ll get the letters done but then when I go over them it just doesn’t scream perfection and I get worried about a rejection that hasn’t happened, and one that can’t if I don’t ever send the damn letters anywhere.  

I can’t figure out why I always do this to myself.  I know I’m not perfect and while you hear people always talking about pitching the perfect pitch and not sending imperfect query letters out, I know that all of them couldn’t have gotten it right all the time.  Their letters couldn’t have always got them a guaranteed acceptance from the publication or agent of their choice.  So why is it that I can’t get the notion of perfection out of my head?  

It’s seriously holding me back and the truth of the matter is that the most imperfect query letter is the one that never gets seen by anyone.  Next week I am going to make it my mission to get up the courage with being okay that I’m not perfect and that my letters most likely won’t be perfect, but at least they will be sent out, and at least, if they do get rejected by everyone I send them to, they were still seen. 

 

Jimmetta Carpenter

Writer/Editor

The Diary: Succession of Lies (Now Available)

Writing as “Jaycee Durant”

https://write-2-be.com/

http://unpleasantlyplump.wordpress.com/

http://www.facebook.com/people/Jimmetta-Carpenter/1069480310

http://www.passionatewriterpublishing.com/thediary.htm

www.lulu.com/ladybugpress

There Can Be No Victory Without Having Something to Defeat

jcladyluv

“Victory is sweetest when you’ve known defeat.”

~Malcolm S. Forbes 

This morning I read Ms. L.’s latest blog post and it got me thinking about how we tend to only want to talk about positive things and spare others from the bad (or at least from so much of the bad).  I myself sometimes feel as if when I post I tend to zero in on the problems and that the positive spin that I try to put on certain struggles I deal with and doubts and fears that I have are just not positive enough.  

In reading Ms. L.’s post it dawned on me that we all love when we hear the feel-good stories but I’m not sure that we realize that the reason we love them so much is because of the struggle that they come from.  We like to hear about the things that people overcome and how hard people have to fight to get where it is that they want to be in life and we applaud the victory on the other side of their struggles.  It gives us a sense of hope for our own situations.  

We can’t always put a positive spin on things that happen in our lives.  Sometimes we just have to tell it like it is and hope that others can take something positive away from whatever it is that we are going through.  There are always lessons to be learned from the experiences that we go through and sometimes the silver lining just doesn’t show up until after the storm clouds are gone. 

However, we still have to fight our way through the storm clouds, and not only that, we have to share our fight.  We have to use our struggles to equip others with the necessary tools that they may not even realize they already have so they can weather the storms too.  There are silver linings to everything, but Ms. L. is right when she points out that those silver linings don’t really mean much without the clouds that you had to go through to get there.     

 

Jimmetta Carpenter

Writer/Editor

The Diary: Succession of Lies (Now Available)

Writing as “Jaycee Durant”

https://write-2-be.com/

http://unpleasantlyplump.wordpress.com/

http://www.facebook.com/people/Jimmetta-Carpenter/1069480310

http://www.passionatewriterpublishing.com/thediary.htm

www.lulu.com/ladybugpress

I Always Wonder If I Made the Right Choice in Choosing My Dream

jcladyluv

“Have the courage to follow your dreams.  It’s the first step towards attaining your destiny.”

~Nikita Koloff 

I was reading a post on a new blog I stumbled on earlier this morning (The Write Life) and it got me thinking about all of the energy and time and money (although not enough of it) and emotions that I have put into my writing and trying to become more successful and get my name out there.  It made me wonder if it has all just been a waste of time and whether or not my time would be better spent working some 9 to 5 job sitting behind some desk typing memos, making copies, and running errands for some boss that I bitch and moan about to my friends as soon as I step foot in my door.  

Perhaps I should have continued to work to build up someone else’s business and continue being frustrated at the lack of time it allowed me to spend with my daughter.  I certainly would have more money to my name than I do now.  I certainly wouldn’t be in a state of perpetual struggle wondering what happens if I don’t have a client, or what happens if I don’t sell my books.  I wouldn’t be in a position where I have to rely on my ability to be fearless (which most days isn’t present) just to be able to put my name out there and get my work seen by the right people (or people who know the right people).  

If I had only chosen some other profession that held a more stable foundation and didn’t provide so much uncertainty, then I might be able to take trips to wherever I want, or throw huge wonderful birthday parties for my daughter, or buy clothes for my daughter as soon as she needs them, or not always be a month behind in paying bills.  I think about the fact that I would be a lot less stressed if I just had a steady stream of income and didn’t choose to go full force at trying to make this thing happen and decide that I wanted to be an at home (or work at home) mother for my daughter.  

A lot of times (more times than I would care to admit) I have those questions run through my head.  Always wondering if I’m a bad mom for choosing my dream over the comfort-ability that lies in always knowing for certain when the next pay check is coming.  But after all of the doubts and fears are swept away, I think about all of the time that I have had with my daughter that I would’ve had to give up and the frustration that I would have continued to feel because I wasn’t able to fully give my writing the attention it needed or deserved when I was working for someone else, and I believe that I have made the right choice, at least the right one for me.  

I know that there are plenty of writers out there who do have a regular9 to 5job in which writing coincides with and I applaud them.  I admire the balance that they are able to have and still maintain their sanity.  I just wasn’t one of those people who could do that.  

Now no one may understand my choice that I made years ago to never go back to working for someone else (at least not in fields and professions that didn’t have anything to do with my passion for writing).  They may see my struggling as proof that it is not the way for them to go about it.  They may (and most likely do) think that I am crazy for not choosing the certainty of knowing when the money is coming in.  They may be right.  

However, when I see the happiness that my daughter feels knowing that I’m going to be the one taking her to school and picking her up and helping her with her homework, I know that I must have done something right.  When I see how proud she is to know her mom is a writer and being able to encourage her to follow her dreams knowing that I followed mine, it makes me feel like its all worth it; all of the uncertainty and the struggle.  There will always be days when I think that I am wasting my time, where I wonder if what I’m doing really makes a difference, but I just have to remember to take a step back and look at what I have already accomplished and know in my heart that I made the best decision, for the both of us.    

 

Jimmetta Carpenter

Writer/Editor

The Diary: Succession of Lies (Now Available)

Writing as “Jaycee Durant”

https://write-2-be.com/

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http://www.passionatewriterpublishing.com/thediary.htm

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