Tag: purpose

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Is My Best Really Good Enough?

July 31, 2023 jcladyluv

I did not win Camp NaNo. Now to be honest I wasn’t as confident this time that I could complete the goal that I had set for this month-long writing challenge, but I held out hope. Right up until the last week I was still hoping that I could push myself harder to finish the task. I did the best I could, but it just wasn’t good enough. Why couldn’t I just buckle down and do what I know needed to be done?

Now one of my amazing friends would probably remind me to have grace with myself. They might even point out that given my current situation it was a win just to have tried and the logical side of me would agree with that. Right now, I’m thinking emotionally and I’m a bit upset with myself. I feel like my best simply wasn’t good enough. Although in terms of writing lately nothing feels like I’ve been doing a good enough job. It doesn’t help that the depression monster is visiting me.

I haven’t really written much of anything since, well since becoming essentially homeless and I am very angry with myself about it. I want to force myself to write but every time I sit down to do so all of the things that I’m stressed about flood my brain instead of words to fill the page. Now I know what you’re thinking. But you’ve been writing blog posts, for example this very post, and isn’t that writing. Yes and no. I consider this more me writing about what I’m feeling, updating you on what’s going on and where my head is at. The creative writing isn’t really flowing the way that I want it to. The way that it should be. That has got to change. I miss writing and I miss the continuity of a writing routine where I can say I wrote a certain number of words, or pages, or hours, in a day. I have to get back to that part of me.

Perhaps this next challenge that I am partaking in for the month of August will help with that. I’ll just say it’s writing something that I’ve never actually written before but have been longing to write. To find out what this challenge is stay tuned to my YouTube channel for the announcement tomorrow (August 1^st) because I’m really excited about it. I’m excited to get back to the creative side of writing and not just a little bit on one day and then maybe a little more a week or two later. I’m excited to write something new and I’m excited to write with some consistency and since this is challenge that I’m doing in a collaborative way I feel like that will encourage me all the more to just sit down and do it.

I hope that I can do it. I hope that I can get back to that creative part of writing that I love as much as breathing. If you have been feeling like you haven’t been doing enough in any particular area of your life, you’re not alone. Know that you are doing the best that you can, even when it doesn’t feel that way. Give yourself a bit of grace and then get right back at it and try again. You can do this and so can I. We’ve got this!

Until next time… #BeDiligent #BeMindful #BeEmpowered

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Jimmetta Carpenter

CEO/Writer/Editor

Write 2 Be Media/Write 2 Be Magazine

Never Be Afraid to Take Up Space

July 17, 2023 jcladyluv

I started thinking last night about how tired I have been feeling. Not just in the physical sense of the word but also mentally and emotionally. I mean in terms of how long I’ve been fighting to make all the things in my life, all the dreams I’ve had for my life, all of the passion I feel towards writing happen and still nothing. Now I’m not saying I haven’t accomplished anything and I certainly never had any expectations of being some overnight success but I will say that I had expected to meet some sustainable level of contentment by the time I was in my 40’s. My level of success doesn’t necessarily equate to fame and fortune (not that those two things wouldn’t also be nice), just simply being able to keep myself afloat and perhaps be able to be in a position to help others. Neither of which have happened clearly as I am currently living out of a hotel room, and even that is in jeopardy from day to day. Some days I just want to give up the fight.

On those days that I just want to throw in the towel and give up I always seem to come across something that motivates me to keep on going. Be it a verse in the bible or an inspirational talk from someone I admire, or sometimes both, something always sparks that drive to just keep hanging in there and go forward, don’t look back. I watched a short speech from actress Sheryl Lee Ralph last night (here’s the link in case you wish to be inspired as well) and she talked about all of the no’s she’s heard in her career and the power that believing in yourself holds. She pondered on what would have happened if she had stopped and given up with every no she heard or every door that closed in her face. She certainly wouldn’t have been in the position to have won her first ever Emmy in her 60’s and become the second African American woman to become an EGOT (Whoopi Goldberg being the first).

She talked about how powerful just the simple act of believing in herself truly was. She had made a promise a long time ago in her career, after hearing a very loud and absurd no from a producer, to always give herself permission to take up space in whatever room she entered, whatever creative field she wanted to dip her toe in. She would not give up on herself no matter what. The truth is if you don’t believe in you then why would anyone else. It’s not that I have never believed in myself. Quite frankly most of the time I think that I am the only person that believes in me but there are days where even that is in question, and I start to wonder do I belong in this field. Are the decks stacked against me for a reason? The doors keep closing, so maybe I just should stop knocking.

Then I start to shift and think maybe the real problem is that I haven’t given myself permission to take up the space that I need to take up. I’ve been trying to fit in whatever space someone would allow me to be in and is that what truly believing in yourself looks like? Maybe I shouldn’t be knocking on the doors, but rather knocking them down (metaphorically of course lol) instead? Maybe my problem to begin with was aiming to just be content instead of seeking the abundant life that God has told me I’m entitled to (John 10:10). Rather than setting the bar too high perhaps I haven’t been setting the bar high enough. There’s no such thing as believing in yourself too much or having too much faith. After all, faith can make broken wings fly and soar, and enable you to take up all of the space in the world that you need. I’m ready to take up some space, are you?

Until next time… #BeConfident #BeBold #BeFearless

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Jimmetta Carpenter

CEO/Writer/Editor

Write 2 Be Media/Write 2 Be Magazine

The Fruit is the Last to Grow

May 15, 2023 jcladyluv

I wrote a post a few weeks ago about my frustration about all the unseen work that goes into what I do and how I just wish that what I’m doing would finally start to bear fruit. It is hard to put constant effort into something day in and day out and just never see anything grow from it. Certainly not the picture of growth that you had in your mind anyway. Then I was reminded the other day when someone sent me a message to not give up and to keep pushing through along with a quote about the fact that the very last thing anyone ever sees growing on a fruit tree is the actual fruit.

It made me think long and hard about all the seed planting that people do, the watering for their dreams and ideas to grow, and even then, you only get sprouts at first, then maybe some twigs or small branches, some leaves of varying nature and finally, after all of that you see the beginnings of the fruit. Not even the whole fruit by the way. Just the beginnings as they peak through and start to finally get some sunlight. It can take up to five years to see a fully formed piece of fruit grow on a tree. Think about how long of a time that must feel like for the person who did the planting of said tree.

As I think that I have mentioned many times here before, patience is not my strong suit. That said when it’s something that you’ve dreamed about having or doing for the vast majority of your life, patient is the only thing you can be. I have been writing since I was a young girl and am only just now starting to publish my work so I can’t expect for my online store with my writing products to just take off right? I mean, obviously I thought it would be doing a little better than it’s doing right now but I took my time to open my online store because I wanted it to be products I believe in and not just something thrown together for the sake of earning an income. I’m willing to wait it out to see it become what I envisioned in my mind it could be.

Seeing this quote also reminded me of something else though. I saw another saying, along those lines, and it said that the best time to plant a tree was 20 years ago and the second-best time is now! If the trees we plant (or in this case the seeds of our dreams that we sow) take at the very least five years for us to see the fruit, then what am I waiting for as it pertains to some other things that I have in mind to do. Writing and having an online store with writing products isn’t the extent of my dreams. I keep waiting, thinking that there will be a perfect time, or at least a better time, to start the other things on my list of dreams to accomplish but time is the only thing that none of us can guarantee. None of us is promised tomorrow or next week, or next month, or even next year.

I’m not trying to sound bleak just trying to put out there what I am just starting to realize. That if you have something that you are dreaming about, constantly, and you see everything it can be in your mind, then start now. Don’t wait for some magical perfect time because there is no such thing. One could argue that maybe there’s a better time, a more financially feasible time, but who knows when that could be or how long it can take. If the seeds we sow today are going to take, bear minimum, five years to materialize then why not start planting them now. They may grow slowly and while you are watering and fertilizing those seeds it may seem like the wait is taking forever but inevitably, they will grow. While you’re waiting just remember that the trees that are slow to grow often bear the best fruit!

Until next time… #BeDiligent #BeConsistent #BePatient

Jimmetta Carpenter

CEO/Writer/Editor

Write 2 Be Media/Write 2 Be Magazine

This Season I Am In…

April 17, 2023 jcladyluv

I’ve been trying to learn to love the season of life I am in but I’m not going to lie, it’s not easy when you feel like you should be in a much different place than you actually are. In my head I know that everything that happens to us or around us, happens for a reason but a lot of those reasons don’t seem apparent right away. It takes patience to be able to appreciate the tough times in life just as much, if not more, than you do the good times and as anyone who knows me knows, patience is not my strong suit.

I get frustrated with the things that I can’t make sense of. I mean there are things that I make mistakes in and genuinely know and understand that this error falls on me because I messed up. However, when I know that I’m doing everything that I can, that I am busting my (pardon my French) ass to make things happen the best way that I know how with the tools that I have (because I don’t always have the tools that I need but I do the best I can) and then I still don’t see the results that I should see it’s frustrating and it’s stressful.

There is supposed to be a time for everything and a purpose for every struggle, but I keep wondering what is the purpose of me being held down and pushed back. Every time I get right to the place where I think I might be about to break through, I just keep getting knocked back down. I don’t stay down mind you, because I don’t quit, but with every hit I find that it’s taking me a little longer to pull myself back up.

I know that nothing worth having in life ever comes easy or without hard work and I don’t have a problem with that. It just starts to feel pointless when you never see anything, or much anyway, come from that hard work. Some days I can appreciate that when I finally do break through (because I will), no one will ever be able to say I didn’t work hard for it, or that I didn’t earn that breakthrough. However, I would also greatly appreciate at least one clear path to the next level.

In any event, I guess this too shall pass. Like so many of you, I’ll just have to keep on pushing that boulder up a hill until I get through this set of obstacles. I definitely will be taking some hard-earned lessons with me into the next season of my life and with any semblance of luck and an infinite amount of Faith the next season will be my greatest yet to come. Here’s to a better season if this one has been a rough one for you too.

Until next time… #BePatient #BeTenacious #BeDiligent

Jimmetta Carpenter

CEO/Writer/Editor

Write 2 Be Media/Write 2 Be Magazine

Will the Doubts Ever Go Away?

April 3, 2023 jcladyluv

I have a huge issue with doubt. As in I have a lot of it. I second guess myself all of the time and it is really starting to annoy me. I wish I wasn’t like this. That I could be one of those people who just takes big leaps of faith and trust that everything is going to work out okay. In theory, because I am a person who deeply believes in God and have a faith in Him that is just ingrained in my spirit, one would think that I would never doubt a thing. But just because the logical part of my brain knows that in the end God will always be there for me no matter whether things work out the way that I want them to or not, the other part of my brain, the not so logical side, just doubts whether everything is going to really work out okay. To put this in terms of my writing career and all the business things I’m attempting, I am busting my butt trying to make things work and it just seems the harder I try the more they don’t work.

For instance, I took a really long time to start my online store with the writing related products, with messages and sayings that I am passionate about and stand behind. I believe they are good products and people have told me that they like my online store and the set-up and everything and yet, nothing. Now I’m not saying that nothing has sold, but certainly not enough to generate a decent income and not nearly as much as I think it should be. I know that most of this is because of marketing but I don’t have money to hire a person to do the marketing and clearly, I’m not doing a good enough job on my own. It’s frustrating. I have books that are out and while those are moving, it certainly would be nice if more of them were moving (but all writers wish to be selling out tons of their books, so I don’t think I’m alone in that lol) so again, frustrating.

There are other things I have in the works, but it just makes me doubt moving forward with those things if the things I already have up and running aren’t working. Some days it just leaves me feeling like such a failure and I don’t know what to do with that feeling. It’s like I’m certainly not where I thought I would be in my life by this point but I’m definitely not as bad off as I could be. I could have stayed stuck in a pit of doubt and just never put out a book or never opened my online store and just lived in the land of what if, but I didn’t. I did the things. I put my work and dreams out there. I just would like to see the fruits of my labor.

But am I laboring enough is the question I find myself asking? Am I doing enough with what I have (which isn’t very much)? There are people who literally don’t sleep working to make their dreams a success and while I don’t require a lot of sleep, as someone who is disabled, physically I simply can’t sacrifice all of my sleep. Does that mean that I don’t want it bad enough if I’m not willing to just sacrifice everything? You see what I mean? I question and second guess everything and I just would really like to be sure about whether I’m doing all the right things or not. I would like to not feel like I’m failing at absolutely everything.

I guess I’m just sharing this today in case there is someone else out there who is feeling this way, or similar to how I’m feeling. What makes things worse sometimes is when you think that you are alone in the things that you are feeling so if you are also having some doubts about the direction you are going, you’re not alone in feeling that way. Understand that it is a period that we all go through (maybe some of us more than others lol) and we just have to keep pushing forward. Sometimes we are just going to have to keep pushing through, even with all the questions we have rumbling around in our minds. It’s the only way to make those dreams of ours come true. Even if you are not like the ones who leap first and ask questions later, if you have to be nudged a little off that tree branch, the important thing is that we still take the leap, otherwise we can never soar.

Until next time… #BeBold #BeBrave #BeFearless

Jimmetta Carpenter

CEO/Writer/Editor

Write 2 Be Media/Write 2 Be Magazine

The Unseen Work

March 20, 2023 jcladyluv

So, the message in church this Sunday was focused a lot on guarding your time carefully and on not devaluing the work that no one ever sees. Those weren’t the exact words and phrasing that my pastor used but that was the gist and it got me thinking a lot. Being a creative individual there is a lot that goes into what we do in creative fields that no one ever sees therefore sometimes it feels like that work is never valued quite enough. There’s a reason people (myself included) love watching behind the scenes stuff about our favorite shows and makings of movies and songs and things like that. It’s because we want to see the work that no one ever gets to see.

It also made me think about how sometimes people don’t get honored or recognized for all the hard work that went into creating one moment or how they can work for decades or sometimes their entire careers, all for one night that comes far past the point where they deserved the recognition. The Oscars that just recently took place is one of those things that makes you think about how long people work in their careers just to be overlooked at this one event that purports to honor the best of the best. I mean are you not the best at what you do just because this particular academy took a vote and chose to give someone else that statue instead of you? Does that make all of the unseen work that you’ve done to get to that moment where you are even among the few that can be chosen not even matter because they didn’t pick you as the best of the best that awards season?

The answer of course is no but it doesn’t always feel that you’re appreciated for all of that unseen work in that moment when your name isn’t called. For writers, who are barely ever really recognized for much, I imagine the sting of disappointment has to feel something like that sting of not hearing your name called on Oscar night when you know you should have really won over a decade ago (yes I’m talking about Angela Basssett).

As a writer and now a content creator who hasn’t “made it” yet I can’t help but often feel like all of the hard work and labor I put into doing what I do and trying to be a positive impact on other people through my gift and the content I create goes unappreciated and often times unnoticed. Logically I know that that’s not true but when you don’t see the “fruits” of your labor so to speak (in this case the money because, shocker, artists, don’t like to starve) it’s hard to know if you are really making a difference. It’s true that money was never the reason I wanted to be a writer or content creator but let’s be real, I do desire to make an income in what I am most passionate about and it’s hard to do that sometimes when it seems like no one really sees you.

The message this Sunday was the reminder that I needed for when I get frustrated about all of the work and effort that I put into my craft and my passions that it is not for nothing. I think I may have mentioned here before that I am not a very patient person, so it makes it hard when I don’t see the benefits for all the work that I do. However, I know that often times what comes easy doesn’t always provide sustainability and more often than not the obstacles that we have to face make the outcomes and rewards even more worth it in the end.

So, if you too have also found yourself wondering what it is all for you are not alone. I see you and I commiserate with you. Just know that all of the work that no one ever gets to see, it all serves a purpose. It is the foundation for the overall outcome that you are aiming for. The long wait for your efforts to be noticed, they will be bolstered by all of the time that you have spent to make things just right. What we are trying to achieve is longevity and when all is said and done because we have done all of the behind the scenes work in masterful fashion, the result will be a legacy that was well worth the wait.

Until next time… #BePatient #BeDetermined #BeRelentless

Jimmetta Carpenter

CEO/Writer/Editor

Write 2 Be Media/Write 2 Be Magazine

Let’s Not Play the Comparison Game

January 23, 2023January 23, 2023 jcladyluv

“Comparison is the thief of joy” ~ Theodore Roosevelt

I try extra hard not to compare things happening in my life to the things that happen in the lives of those around me and in my circle. I would say that out of all of the days in a month, over half of them I succeed in that mission because I know that we can never see what someone else does in their everyday life to achieve whatever level of success they’re having at the moment. In reality the truth is that most of the time, if you are not succeeding at whatever dream you are chasing the problem isn’t someone else’s efforts on their journey but perhaps your lack of effort in your own, or it could just simply not be your time. Most days I remember that. Most.

There are some days, maybe a little over a handful, where you truly feel like you are doing absolutely everything that you possibly can, and you see someone on a similar path as you and everything seems to be working out in amazing fashion for them. Frankly in those few days the shit just feels unfair. You’re working your ass off, pouring everything you’ve got into this dream and vision you have, and sometimes pouring things you don’t have in the emotional tank and still…nothing. You think, how much damn adversity is one person supposed to go through before they just break. That whole notion where it’s just not your time and your time will come just seems like utter bullshit on those days and you’re just mad at anyone who is on the adjacent path and are just traveling along with no bumps or obstacles that YOU can see. Does any of this sound like feelings you’ve dealt with? No! Just me?

Well, I have had a few of those days already for the month of January and I’m telling you, sometimes it just makes me want to throw in the towel and give up on everything. But then I look at my vision board and see this quote I put on there for this very eventual moment. It says, “You didn’t come this far, to ONLY come this far”. I need the constant reminder that I’ve come so much farther than I have to go (at least I hope so because truthfully, I can’t see the entire road ahead of me) and that if I quit now, it will have all been for nothing. Honestly if I didn’t believe in my dream and my vision so emphatically, I probably would have given up on it a very long time ago, but I believe in this and I know this is what I was put here to do.

This is what I need to remind myself of when I start comparing my journey to the road that other people are on because the only thing that accomplishes is it makes me resentful of that person (and that’s not who I am) and it plants seeds of doubt in my own mind about my journey. I have different abilities and limits than the next person and I can’t map out my journey according to someone else’s level of effort and ability because, once again, their journey and mine won’t be the same.

So, when you have those bad days where everyone’s road starts to look so much easier to you than your own, just remember that while it’s natural to have those feelings, you have to put into perspective that the grass is not always greener on the other side of the fence. As the quote says at the top of the post, comparison is the biggest thief of joy and I for one want more joy in my life, I don’t want to be the one stealing joy away from myself. Don’t you allow yourself to be the thief of your own joy. Just make sure to keep watering the grass on your own side of the fence.

Until next time… #BePatient #BeBold #BeMindful

Jimmetta Carpenter

CEO/Writer/Editor

Write 2 Be Media/Write 2 Be Magazine

When Does Later Become Now?

January 9, 2023 jcladyluv

I don’t know about you, but I have spent large parts of my life planning for later. I’m a planner by nature so most things I do have to have some kind of plan or else I can’t function. In other words, I am not a fly by the seat of your pants kind of person. I don’t do well with spontaneity (and believe me I have tried). Now you might say, well planning is a good thing. You need a solid plan to build businesses, careers, and to really see your dreams through, don’t you?

The thing about planning so much (or at least as much as I do, which would probably be considered over-planning) is that you’re making plans for what comes later without thinking about what can be done now. I heard someone say the other day that people who always wait and plan to do things later, are people who never get things done. Now I’m sure this wasn’t meant literally because as I said earlier, everything needs a plan of some kind but there is a such thing as planning so much that you become stagnant and unmovable. A point in which you’ve made all of the plans, you’ve done all of the research, you’ve got all of your ducks in a row and then you find yourself so used to being in the planning stage that you start to wonder, well what now. What do I do with all of this planning now?

You start to overthink whether you’ve made all of the right plans. Did you research all of the right things and were your sources of research correct. You begin to wonder if you should now plan all of the ways that things can go wrong and subsequently what do you do when they don’t go as you originally planned. This can become a never-ending cycle of planning and preparation which turns into you never actually getting the thing you’ve been planning all this time for done.

So, with that in mind I’m going to make conscious efforts this year to do the things that I have been wanting to get done for a while right in this span of time that I have now. I don’t want to keep waiting for things to be perfect like I had been doing because that’s never going to happen. There were so many things that I didn’t do last year all because I was waiting for some magical “right” time to happen. I was waiting for everything to fall into place after doing all of the planning and research for the perfect moment. I was waiting for the right circumstances to be in play. But all of that waiting doesn’t bring you success.

You know what I’ve learned by studying really successful people and combing over the facets of their lives and how they built their dreams up into reality? They never waited until later. I mean sure they planned and researched but they didn’t allow themselves to become consumed with the idea of “perfect timing” and what that would look like. They planned and then they leaped and said let whatever happens happen. Did some of them make mistakes along the way? Of course they did but you can’t make mistakes if you don’t take the jump to begin with.

On my vision board there’s a saying that says, “It’s time to trust my instincts, close my eyes, and leap” and that’s what I want to do this year. I’ve spent years planning things out and researching things to the point of exhaustion. This year (as afraid of heights as I am lol) it’s time for me to just close my eyes and take that leap of faith. Faith, not only in myself, but in what God has placed inside of my heart to do and the mark I am meant to leave behind in this world. So, if you’ve been waiting for some magical right time to just go for whatever it is you want, that time is NOW! Just Jump!

Until next time… #BeFearless #BeBold #BeBrave

Jimmetta Carpenter

CEO/Writer/Editor

Write 2 Be Media/Write 2 Be Magazine

It All Depends On How High You Bounce Back

November 21, 2022 jcladyluv

“If you never know failure, you will never know success” ~ Sugar Ray Leonard

I haven’t written here in a few weeks, roughly about a month and I just want you to know that it wasn’t because I suddenly ran out of things to say. Aside from the fact that NaNoWriMo is this month and I tend to be more singularly focused on writing a brand-new novel in November, the last few weeks have just been inherently hard. I have been feeling like the Universe has just singled me out and said, ‘nope you can’t get any wins right now because you just don’t deserve to win’.

Now of course I know, logically, that that’s a little ridiculous because everyone deserves a win in life. It’s just not feeling like I’m going to get one anytime soon. It’s kind of like getting a couple of steps ahead for once and then getting knocked fifteen steps backward. It’s hard to feel optimism in that scenario. Yet, I am reminded of the fact that each time I think I’m not going to survive through the week, somehow by the time the end of the week gets here I’m still standing, and I have survived to fight another day, another week, another month, another year.

We’re getting close to the end of this year and that’s about the time where I usually reflect on the things I didn’t get accomplished and the plans that didn’t come to fruition so that I can figure out where I went wrong in my planning and plan effectively for the following year. However, it feels like my best laid plans don’t seem to ever materialize the way that I think they will, if they materialize at all. I thought for a moment that maybe I just shouldn’t plan anything, maybe I should just go with the flow but trust me, if you know anything about me by now, you know that my little planner heart would literally break without having a plan in place. So, what then? If the plans seem to not be working but I can’t just not plan, what do I do with that?

I don’t think I’m the type of person that could just not plan for success. Maybe the key is just to manage my expectations which could then manage my disappointment. Perhaps it’s just as simple as knowing that failure is the very life blood of success because how can you truly succeed without failing a few times (or in my case a few dozen times) because failure is the very proof that you are trying, that you are going for your dreams, and that you are not giving up on them, ever. As much as I may sometimes want to throw in the towel, it’s just not in my nature to give up.

I know that I want to be purposeful in everything I do in this life. I want to inspire others with my gift for words and motivate those who may also be struggling with big dreams and crushing defeats. You can’t do any of that if you’re just going to throw your hands up and say to hell with it, I give up. I’ve never been a quitter, and that’s not to say there haven’t been moments when I tried to quit (both at life and my dreams). It’s also not to say there won’t be moments in the future where I’ll have really hard days and want to quit again but I’m made of stronger stuff than that, and so are you! We’ve got this and no matter how many times life tries to knock us down we will keep getting right back up because that’s what success is truly about. It’s about continuing to get back up no matter what and no matter how long it takes to achieve the dream!

Until next time… #BeFearless #BeTenacious #BeDiligent

Jimmetta Carpenter

CEO/Writer/Editor

Write 2 Be Media/Write 2 Be Magazine