Don’t Let Someone Else’s Disbelief In You Become Your Reality

There are so many people who have big dreams and visions for their lives and they never even try to accomplish them. They essentially give up before they even begin. What’s more surprising about that is that the reason they don’t try is not because they don’t have the passion to do so, but rather because someone else told them that they wouldn’t achieve it. I don’t have to imagine how someone can let someone else’s predictions for their lives become their reality because I was almost that person.

I had a mother who constantly told me that I would never accomplish anything that I dreamed of doing and who did her best to keep me down in terms of my goals and my vision and for a really long time I allowed her to keep me from trying at my full potential. Mind you, there was never a time that I wasn’t trying (because the calling to write was just too strong) but I know that I held back on the level of try that I had because I believed what she said about me.

There was a lot of things I had to go through and realizations that I had which made me come to terms with the toxic person that my mother is and made me understand that I just would never really have her support and that was okay because I knew what I was meant to do and what my dreams and goals are and only I am responsible for the level of tenacity I have. 

Now what I really want others to realize and see for themselves is that they can’t let other people’s ideas of what your life is supposed to look like affect what you want your life to look like. Their perception of your aspirations is not your problem nor should it ever become your reality. If you are still struggling to figure out what your purpose and vision is for your life I encourage you to sit down with yourself and God, with some paper and pen and really think about what it is you want and then put a plan of action into place to go after it.

If you already know what you want but you are grappling with others opinions, stop! Their opinions don’t matter. God and you are the only two opinions that matter and in all honesty, truly it’s only God’s opinion and purpose He has for your life because sometimes what He has planned for us isn’t even what we planned for ourselves.  Make your own path and don’t let the outside noise cloud your focus.

Until next time… #BeBold #BeFearless #BeEmpowered

 

Jimmetta Carpenter 

Writer/Editor 

https://write-2-be.com/

http://write2bemagazine.com/

http://www.facebook.com/people/Jimmetta-Carpenter/1069480310

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Side note:  I have a new Author Newsletter that I would love it if you signed up for http://www.tinyletter.com/Author_JCCarpenter

And if any of you would like to buy me a coffee and donate to my creative endeavors then please feel free to https://ko-fi.com/authorjccarpenter

Laying the Groundwork

So I’m about to have another birthday on Thursday and I’ll be turning 41 and thinking about really crossing further into the forties has me thinking about whether or not I’m satisfied with the direction that my life is going. I mean of course I had plans when I was younger of what my forty year old self would be doing in life and where I would be in my career and on the ladder of success.

However, when I was younger I was naïve to the reality of adulthood and what having all of those things that I want would take in terms of effort and sheer willpower after getting repeatedly knocked down and having to pry myself off the ground to get back up and keep pushing forward. Honestly if you had asked me when I was younger if I thought I had the tenacity and strength to have to keep pushing through all of the obstacles that have been thrown at me I would have said no, I can’t do it, I’m just not that strong. I’m glad to say that I would have been wrong because you never truly know how strong you are until you have to be.

So what have I learned in these 41 years of living? I suppose I would say the biggest thing that I’ve learned about myself, and that I continue to learn as I move forward in my career goals, is that I have never lost my passion for what it is I know I am supposed to do with my life. Even though I’m not sure how I knew writing was my purpose back when I was just six years old (at six I wouldn’t have known anything about the use of the word purpose lol) I have never wavered from that dream.  Sure I thought I would be where I desired to be by now but again, that was the naiveté of a child dreaming that just assumed if you’re talented and wanted it bad enough it would happen easily.

I know a lot of people who think writing is nothing special and that it’s an easy thing to do. I often get those that think I don’t do anything at all because I’m “just a writer” they say and that’s “not that hard to do” which is infuriating because this is not a career for the feint of heart.  I have literally dedicated my entire life to this craft and it is who I am, not just what I do. At 41 I’m not on any New York Time’s Bestsellers list (as I hoped I would be at this point) and frankly I am just now in the process of re-releasing my first novel and a couple of poetry books this year but I have put in years of article writing and blogging here on this blog, creating a newsletter first, and then magazine, to make sure that I do my part to highlight other authors to the best of my ability, and now I even have a YouTube channel in which I talk about my writing life and that is not nothing.

A couple of years ago, in the mindset I was in then, I would have been sulking and further depressed about where I wasn’t in my life, only focused on what I haven’t been able to accomplish.  Today, because I have been working on my spiritual journey, my mindset has drastically shifted to where I don’t see it quite that way anymore. I see all that I have been able to accomplish as me laying the groundwork for all of the victorious things that I know are to come. I have been getting prepared for my dreams to come to fruition and I think I needed that preparation.

Just because things don’t happen on the timetable that we want them to, doesn’t mean they won’t happen. In fact it may be better for them not to happen when we want them because I find that oftentimes when we think we are ready for things, more than likely we aren’t ready at all. If you haven’t gotten to where you want in life just yet, don’t let that get you down. Just think of it as you laying the groundwork for all that is to come and keep pushing, keep working, and you will get there. God wouldn’t give you the vision and the dream if He hadn’t prepared a way for you to have it when He’s ready for you to.

Until next time #BePatient #BePersistent #BeReady

 

Jimmetta Carpenter 

Writer/Editor 

https://write-2-be.com/

http://write2bemagazine.com/

http://www.facebook.com/people/Jimmetta-Carpenter/1069480310

https://www.facebook.com/Write2BeMagazine

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Side note:  I have a new Author Newsletter that I would love it if you signed up for http://www.tinyletter.com/Author_JCCarpenter

 

And if any of you would like to buy me a coffee and donate to my creative endeavors then please feel free to https://ko-fi.com/authorjccarpenter

When One Chapter Closes…

For the last week or so I’ve been doing last minute prepping details for my daughter’s high school graduation. It’s been a mixture of things from frustrating (just because of the tediousness of all the details), and exciting, and of course extremely emotional. Even though my daughter technically turned 18 on the first day of May I knew my actual job wasn’t really done until she successfully walked across that stage and received her high school diploma.

And yes, of course I know that a parent’s job is never actually done, but from birth until high school graduation is one really long chapter and once it closes the next chapter is going to look a bit different. I know this next chapter is going to be me parenting an adult child. I have to balance knowing when to trust that I raised her well enough to make the right decisions for herself and her newly adult life while knowing when to covertly sneak in and steer her in the direction I know is best for her but still making her think it was all really her choice lol.

I’m laughing but not really because isn’t that what we do when you strongly advise them to do something, giving them the benefit of our experiences. After that we just cross our fingers and hope they make the right call and that if they don’t make the choice we would’ve made, pray that your child is right and you are actually wrong because then that means they will be okay.

I am praying that I did a good enough job and that I instilled in her what she needs to make the decisions that will make her journey, not easy, but worthwhile.  I don’t know how this new chapter of parenting and this brand new chapter of adulthood for my child is going to go and I wish I can say I’m one of those people who embrace the excitement of finding out along the way but you guys know that I am not that person lol. 

I just pray that this next chapter for her will be everything that she wants it to be and that I will be able to be there for her in the way that pushes her forward and motivates her because I didn’t have a mother that cheered for my dreams and that supported my creative endeavors. I didn’t have a mother that I could even go to for advice about how best to follow my dreams so I have tried to be that for my daughter.

I just hope that I did my job well so that she can walk her journey with confidence and assuredness that she can, in fact, have everything that she dreams of, as long as she’s willing to put in the work for it. Graduation day is tomorrow and thus this chapter will be closed and a new one can begin. I’m just crossing my fingers and I’m going to cheer her on the whole way through.

Until next time… #BeBrave #BeEmpowered #BeFearless

 

Jimmetta Carpenter 

Writer/Editor 

https://write-2-be.com/

http://write2bemagazine.com/

http://www.facebook.com/people/Jimmetta-Carpenter/1069480310

https://www.facebook.com/Write2BeMagazine

https://www.facebook.com/AuthorJCCarpenter

https://twitter.com/jcladyluv 

https://twitter.com/write2bemag 

https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCPU35EkFSbuxgekCp4LfI5g

Side note:  I have a new Author Newsletter that I would love it if you signed up for http://www.tinyletter.com/Author_JCCarpenter

And if any of you would like to buy me a coffee and donate to my creative endeavors then please feel free to https://ko-fi.com/authorjccarpenter

Are We Creating the Right Habits to Accomplish Our Goals?

I did a YouTube video last week talking about my process in between writing projects, well specifically, novels. It made me think about the different routines that we have for different phases in our lives that we get through and how varying those routines can be depending on which phase of the creative process we are in.  I have a routine for when I’m writing, albeit a routine that could use some fine tuning.  I have a routine for when I’m taking a creative break from things altogether. I have a routine for if I’m just conducting research for a particular project. Interestingly enough, as organized as it may seem to have all your bases covered no matter what stage of creativity you are in it can be counterproductive. Or maybe it’s just me that is starting to feel like having a different routine for everything is just a way to not have a concrete routine overall.

I’m currently reading (or rather listening to on audiobooks) Atomic Habits by James Clear and he talks a lot about creating systems that help you to achieve your overall goals but not relying so heavily in the goals. I haven’t gotten that far yet but so far his theory is that if you use the same system to achieve things then you can start to rely in your system that you set up and not necessarily the goals because inevitably following your system is going to get you to the goal anyway, just maybe not at the speed in which you have set up in your goals. What I understand so far is that creating habits that you can stick to and do instinctively without really thinking about them is more valuable then having these bullet points for goals that oftentimes seem unattainable and out of reach.

Now he wasn’t saying that you shouldn’t have goals at all anymore, but rather that you should have formed habits and ways of getting to those goals. For instance, I have a book that I’ve been trying to republish since last year and for one reason or another it is proving to be a longer process than I initially thought. But is that because my goals are off or because my habits in getting those goals accomplished are off? I should have a proven system that is going to allow me to produce more of what I need to do in order to get those goals tackled. I can have all the goals I want to have and they can be lofty or they can be relaxed but without the methods and a system put in place to actively get to that goal, then the habits have to be consistent.

What are your systems or habits for achieving what you want out of life? Are you practicing those habits consistently? Take some time to think about whether you are setting goals just to set goals or if you are actually taking steps and forming habits that will help you fully achieve those goals. Having goals to strive for are great. Having routines to get through your different creative phases is wonderful. But having habits formed and being consistent in keeping up those habits is what will get us to the point where we can say we accomplished those goals.

Until next time… #BeMindful #BeProductive #BeConsistent

Jimmetta Carpenter 

Writer/Editor 

https://write-2-be.com/

http://write2bemagazine.com/

http://www.facebook.com/people/Jimmetta-Carpenter/1069480310

https://www.facebook.com/Write2BeMagazine

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Continuing to Build on the Vision

“Then the LORD answered me and said: “Write the vision And make it plain on tablets, That he may run who reads it.”

~Habakkuk 2:3

Listening to the first message of the New Year preached by my Pastor in my virtual church setting I felt as if it was an answer to some things that I had not yet worked up the courage to ask God about. Direction that I suppose I was reluctant to ask for because I had thought I had known so clearly in which way to go next and yet during these last few weeks of rest and restoration of my creativeness I seemed to be slightly stuck. Or maybe the more apt way to put it was that I was unsure if I was correct in the way I had perceived that I was to go. I was ready to write down my plans for the year but I kept hesitating when it came to putting pen to paper and plans on physical calendars. It’s like God knew that I needed to be nudged or reassured and decided to speak to me yesterday morning.

I’m sure there will be some slight corrections as I walk my path this year but after the message and reading the scriptures in the service, plus my devotionals later on, I think that I am starting this year on the right track. My journey to where I’m going surely seems to be modeled after the story of the tortoise and the hare, with me clearly being the tortoise but I am reminded in that story that slow and steady wins the race.

I suppose it doesn’t matter how long one takes to reach and fulfill the purpose that has been to them so long as you get there following the directions you were given, no short cuts, no avoiding of the adversities that may come along the way. After all those adversities may very well be the lessons that the next person needs that comes behind you.

One thing is for sure when it comes to fulfilling a purpose and achieving your goals. You should write them down. Don’t just keep them in your head out of uncertainty or out of fear that maybe you aren’t on the right track. It’s much easier to discern how to get back on course if you can visibly see where it is that you went off course at.

Writing down your goals is imperative to getting them done so take some time today, if you haven’t already, and write down what you plan on getting accomplished this year. If you feel like sharing let me know what a few of them are. If you’d like, go check out what my goals are for this year on my YouTube channel. Happy New Year everyone and until tomorrow… #BeAmbitious #BePersistent #BeFearless

 

Jimmetta Carpenter

Writer/Editor

https://write-2-be.com/

http://write2bemagazine.com/

http://www.facebook.com/people/Jimmetta-Carpenter/1069480310

https://www.facebook.com/Write2BeMagazine

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https://twitter.com/write2bemag 

https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCPU35EkFSbuxgekCp4LfI5g

It’s Not Failing If You Learned Something

As I recently made a video discussing my fourth quarter goals and therein my third quarter failures I felt the need to reiterate the revelation that I make in my video (it will be posted tomorrow if you want to subscribe to my channel to see it when it uploads) here to those of you who might read this.  I like to think that what we would traditionally deem as our failures, we should start thinking of them as lessons.

Something is only a failure if you never learn anything from it. I did not do well with my quarter 3 goals and I held off on making my video about what I wanted my fourth quarter goals to be because I was frankly a bit embarrassed at the complete and utter lack of completion with quarter 3. But as I thought about it more and more I realized that while I didn’t get the things done that I wanted to I learned a lot in the process. I gained more information that I didn’t have before and that I needed. I also did inch forward on the goal, just not the huge strides.

Every lesson learned on the way to your destination is making you better and more prepared to face what’s coming up next and if you understand that, if you have learned the lessons and begin to put them into practice, then you haven’t failed. You only fail if you were too closed off or stubborn or set in your own ways to learn something.

So think about that the next time you’re calling yourself a failure because something you’ve been working hard on didn’t go the way you envisioned. Did you learn something? Did you get the knowledge that you needed to make another go at it and get further along the next time you make your attempt? If the answer is yes, then you haven’t failed. You’ve grown and that’s really all that we can ask for.  Until next time… #BeOpenminded #BeWilling #BeProductive

 

Jimmetta Carpenter

Writer/Editor

https://write-2-be.com/

http://write2bemagazine.com/

http://www.facebook.com/people/Jimmetta-Carpenter/1069480310

https://www.facebook.com/Write2BeMagazine

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Embracing the Burdens We Carry

“Let us go up at once and take possession, for we are well able to overcome it.” ~Numbers 13:30

I read something about obstacles and burdens the other night. It was a parable of sorts in which the young man asked the elderly man what is life’s heaviest burden and the elderly man replied having nothing to carry. I can’t really explain why that struck such a chord with me but it did. I took a few minutes to sit with that statement and really decipher what that meant, in general and more specifically to me. So often we think only of the fact that we have a new problem to face with multiple obstacles to dodge around but I’ve never thought about the reality of the fact that without any problems or obstacles to go through what are we really doing with our lives. I mean if you think about it, when you don’t have any obstacles to face that means that you’re not taking any risks or at least not enough of them. It means that you aren’t being productive to the best of your ability because anything worth pursuing is going to push you outside of your comfort zone, which is essentially going to bring about hurdles to jump over and hoops to propel through.

I had to rethink how I feel about the obstacles and problems that I’ve had to go through in the past and more recently. We always seem to discover how strong we are and how hungry we are for our goals when we are tested and pushed to the brink. I was seeing them as more as something to question as opposed to seeing them as something to embrace. I kept wondering why it was that I keep working so hard to achieve my goals and yet everything still keeps getting in my way. However, after reading that phrase from the young man to the elderly one, I suppose I need to be thankful for those obstacles. Not only do they prove that I am in fact trying and taking risks (arguably not as big of a risk as I would like to be but that’s neither here nor there), but they also push me to keep moving forward and it shows me (in case I sometimes forget) just how much my dreams mean to me.

The thing about obstacles is that they are unavoidable. You can’t really plan to not have obstacles, the best you can really do is strategize the best plan you can to push through those obstacles because they’re inevitable. The problems that we face and the predicaments that we find ourselves having to endure are inevitable but as long as we rely on God and make a plan on how to navigate around the hurdles we face then we won’t ever really fail. Failure means that you never tried and those obstacles that you find yourself weathering through are proof that you did in fact take risks. Remember the saying about Go bringing us through the storms of our lives. Try to also remember that he never said that there wouldn’t be any storms. Embrace the burdens you’ve been given to carry because having nothing to carry at all could be heavier than you realize. Until next time…#BeUncomfortable #BePatient #BeinFaith

 

Jimmetta Carpenter 

Writer/Editor 

https://write-2-be.com/

http://write2bemagazine.com/

http://www.facebook.com/people/Jimmetta-Carpenter/1069480310

https://www.facebook.com/Write2BeMagazine

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Even When I Don’t Feel Like It

So normally I would have some thought provoking things to say, like I try to at the start of every week to not only motivate myself but hopefully motivate all of you who read my blog as well. However, today is not going to be one of those days. If I’m being honest, because I try to be as authentic as possible here with you guys, the last couple of weeks have been emotionally and mentally draining and I am not feeling extremely motivated today. So why am I posting today anyway then? Simply put, I made a promise to myself that I would do better at making a habit of writing daily this year.

What that means is that I don’t just want to not write at all because I’m feeling depressed or because I’m feeling mentally exhausted (like the world is about to crumble in on me) because that’s what I’ve done in previous years and then I become absent and then my writing, the one thing that I love more than almost anything (second only to my daughter), becomes non-existent. At that point the only habit that I would have created was that of NOT writing and then I end up with all these ideas stored up in my head with nothing to show for it. They say it takes thirty days to form a habit and this past November when I did NaNoWriMo again after not doing it for a while, I struck up that habit again and I fell even more in love with writing (if that was even possible). After all isn’t that what NaNoWriMo is all about, creating a way for writers who struggle to get in the habit of making writing a daily thing.

So while I may be feeling a little out of sorts today and I am struggling to even find words to write this, I knew that I had to because writing is like breathing for me. I can’t break this habit again because I’ve discovered when I let the days slip by without getting any words down, I become more and more out of sorts and unmotivated, and not like myself and that is not going to get me anywhere. It certainly isn’t going to help get the three books I plan to self-publish this year finished. So that’s all I have for you today and I’m sorry that I couldn’t be more for you but I did my best I just have to hope that it’s enough. Until next time… #BeMindful #BeYou

Jimmetta Carpenter

Writer/Editor

https://write-2-be.com/

http://write2bemagazine.com/

http://www.facebook.com/people/Jimmetta-Carpenter/1069480310

https://www.facebook.com/Write2BeMagazine

https://twitter.com/jcladyluv 

https://twitter.com/write2bemag 

Just a quick reminder…

Write 2 Be Magazine wants to be a part of your plan for promoting yourself and your work! Find out more about our promotional campaign by clicking on this link

https://write2bemagazine.com/write-2-be-magazine-marketing-and-promotion-campaign/

Also, if you have just finished your book and you are looking for an editor or even just someone to proofread find out how I can help by clicking on this link

https://write-2-be.com/write-2-be-freelance-writing-services/

Lastly, if you would like to contribute to my self-publishing efforts this year here is where you can make a donation to the dream

https://www.gofundme.com/f/book-project-for-write-2-be-media

 

Time That Is Not Our Own

It’s a brand New Year, in a brand new decade and I don’t know about you guys but I have no more time to waste. I’ve been thinking a lot about the time that we spend doing things that do not lend themselves to the purpose that we are placed on this earth for, whatever that purpose may be for you. We let our presumed obligations and even our loving hearts guilt us into giving time to things that will not eventually bear fruit and often leaves us with unfinished goals.

I use to believe that to think of myself first would be completely selfish and just not being a good servant of God and the purpose that he has for me. However, in having a recent conversation with a friend of mine, Ms. L., I remembered something very important. She reminded me that I am God’s child too. I mean it’s not that I don’t know that already but sometimes I forget that focusing on me doesn’t mean that I suddenly don’t care about others. Oftentimes we are more worried about tending to someone else’s needs (especially if you have children) and having compassion for what other people might want that we forget about what might be best for us.

When it comes to following our dreams and living out our purpose, we tend to put time into things, and often people, who take us away from what it is we are supposed to be focused on. We feel like we owe them that time, our time, when in reality, we don’t owe anyone else our time. In fact our time is not even ours to give away. The time that we have here on this earth is God’s time, in which he is entrusting us to accomplish certain goals and tasks, at certain intervals of our lives, for the betterment of an end result that is not even for us to see.

This is in no way me saying that other people don’t matter. In fact it is quite the opposite. Sometimes what we are supposed to be spending our time on will eventually better the lives of someone else who needs it. However, if we are not in the right place in our journey, at the precise time that we were designated to get there, then we will have missed that opportunity to be the blessing in someone else’s life that we were supposed to be, all because we devoted time to something else that was not even our mission to begin with.

We shouldn’t be made to feel guilty if we can not devote time to things or people the way that we might have been able to when we weren’t sure what our purpose was. Time is precious and it’s not promised to anyone and we have to be careful with what we do with it because there are important things that need to be done while we are still here to do them. The time that you have been given is the time that God has given you in order to do with it what he wants you to do with it. We don’t owe that time to anyone else. So this year, let’s start placing the focus back on ourselves and let’s not waste anymore time that isn’t ours to waste in the first place. Until next time… #BeFocused #BeMindful #BeProductive

Jimmetta Carpenter 

Writer/Editor 

https://write-2-be.com/

http://write2bemagazine.com/

http://www.facebook.com/people/Jimmetta-Carpenter/1069480310

https://www.facebook.com/Write2BeMagazine

https://twitter.com/jcladyluv 

https://twitter.com/write2bemag 

Oh wait! Just wanted to remind you…

Write 2 Be Magazine wants to be a part of your plan for promoting yourself and your work! Find out more about our promotional campaign by clicking on this link

https://write2bemagazine.com/write-2-be-magazine-marketing-and-promotion-campaign/

Also, if you have just finished your book and you are looking for an editor or even just someone to proofread find out how I can help by clicking on this link

https://write-2-be.com/write-2-be-freelance-writing-services/

 

In the Moments When You Think You’ve Failed

 

 

failing post

I was having a moment the other day. Actually I had a few moments over the course of the past weekend. You know those moments when you just question and second guess every single little thing that you’re doing because you’re not sure if you’re really doing anything right. There were some things that weren’t going right in my actual writing the other day so it made me question whether I’m even still any good at this writing thing I love so much or am I just wasting my time. I looked at my numbers (my stats)on my blog posts and on the posts on the magazine and even though they were going up the increase just wasn’t matching up with the effort that I was putting in so it made me wonder if I was doing enough or was I just not good enough in that department either.

There were some other little personal things that I was having issues with which I’d rather not go into detail about that were making me question myself as well. Then my daughter and I had a, how shall I say, difference of opinion on something that made her upset with me (when I felt like there wasn’t any reason for her to be—typical teenage stuff) and because of all of the other little moments I had been having I was already feeling on the edge of having my emotions spill over so that moment with her just made me feel like I was now failing in the mom department as well. I’m not going to lie, I shed a few tears this past weekend because I just felt like nothing I was doing was good enough or right and I felt like I was literally failing at everything.

Then I went to church Sunday and my pastor’s message was about being ready to (fittingly enough) deal with adversity in life. He talked about how adversity makes you stronger and how nothing you ever achieve in life will be achieved without going through some great adversity. He talked about trusting in the relationship that you have with God and in the fact that while it may often times seem like things aren’t going right, that they aren’t going just the way you think they ought to go, and even how sometimes it may seem like the path you’ve chosen is wrong because of the turmoil or hard times you may be going through, that you have to not only trust God through the hard times or the uncertainties, but you have to trust that the relationship that you have built with God is strong enough to get you through those times until you reach the light on the other end of what seems like total darkness.

It’s not the ease of life that is what lets us know that we are fulfilling the purpose we are here to fulfill, but rather the strength that we discover in ourselves when we have come out of the hard times. That strength that propels us forward and allows us to keep moving, battle scars and all, to the next level is what lets us know that in the end we only fail if we never put up a fight. So even though I had my moments where I felt like I was failing at everything that I was doing, I realized on Sunday, that as long as I was still trying, still fighting to get my message out, fighting to fulfill my purpose, fighting to be a good mom and raise my child in the best way that I possibly can, I may not do everything perfect and I may make a lot more mistakes along the way but at least I’m fighting. That alone means I’m winning!

Jimmetta Carpenter

Writer/Editor

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