Write 2 Be

I Want to Be in the Room Where Things Happen

March 5, 2025 jcladyluv

I am not a particularly envious person. I celebrate all successes, and I genuinely believe that we all deserve to live our best lives. I believe that if you work hard and use your drive and ambition to propel you forward, then you will get to where it is you’re trying to go. But I am not naïve to the fact that there are some who get where they’re going out of sheer luck or because they just know the right people. I would be lying if I said that I didn’t wish I was the person who had that kind of luck or knew the right people because my hard work does not seem to be paying off.

I’ve wanted to be a writer since I was 6 years old and have been actively working at it since I was 10 years old. I started doing freelance work more than a decade ago and I have never once given up on the dream of being a full-time writer someday. Even had the audacity to think that at some point I would be able to get a job in someone’s writing room because writing for television has also been one of my goals. Now I’ll be honest and say that there are quite a few opportunities that I never even tried to shoot for because I had too many negative voices of people around me (on top of my own self-doubts) telling me that it could never happen, and I believed them.

That said, I’ve seen people write one book and find themselves on the Bestseller’s list. I’ve seen people write one script for a show and suddenly they’re the industry’s hottest new script writer. I don’t begrudge them their success at all, but I do wonder, if I’m working my ass off and I have the talent to back it up (because I have never once questioned my writing ability) then where is my success story at.

I understand putting in the work, but I have been working towards this dream for nearly my entire life, and I just feel like I should be so much further by now. I should be in the room where things are happening, and I can’t figure out why I’m not. I’ve got multiple degrees, I’ve studied my craft, I’ve written several manuscripts and poems, and stories, and articles, and if being a kind- and good-hearted person matters at all, I’d like to think I’m that too.

So why is it that some things come so much easier for some as opposed to others? I have my speculations as to what the answer to that are but truthfully, no one ever really knows why one person gets rewarded for all of their efforts and another person doesn’t. I do wonder at times if all of the ambition and drive I put into this calling that I have, this gift, what I truly feel is my purpose, is worth all of the rejection and heartache and sacrifice and loss.

I guess the simple answer is yes. I mean would I have been at this for more than three decades of my life (more if you actually count when I started working on the craft of writing itself) if I didn’t think that it would all be worth it in the end? I couldn’t have given so much of myself and dived as deep into this dream of being a crafter of words if I didn’t believe that it was worth giving it absolutely everything that I’ve got. I’m a writer. I was born to be a writer. If there was anything that I was put here on this earth to do, aside from being a mother to my amazing wonderfully gifted daughter with creative talents of her own, it was to impact people with my words.

So, do I feel the urge to give up sometimes? Yes! When I’m sitting in the waiting room of life, patiently waiting for my turn to be allowed in the room where things happen for people. The room where people get to see their dreams become a reality. The room where creatives like me get met with people who believe in their talent and ability enough to propel them forward on the ladder of success. When I keep having to peep inside the window, watching others get their turn and I wonder where is mine. Those are the moments I feel defeated. But the thing I’ve learned about myself over the years is that I refuse to be defeated. I refuse to give up. I want to be in the room where things happen and one day I will be, even if I’m the last person left standing in the waiting room.

Until Next Time… #BePatient #BeDiligent #BePersistent

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Jimmetta Carpenter

CEO/Writer/Editor

Write 2 Be Media/Write 2 Be Magazine

Struggling to Find the Light

February 26, 2025 jcladyluv

“Ease is a greater threat to progress than hardship.” ~ Denzel Washington

I’ve been feeling quite restless and uncertain lately. Okay, let’s be real, for nearly the last two years, since I lost my home, I’ve been living in a state of limbo and survival mode. It is not a good, or mentally healthy place to be. I’ve also been feeling homesick which I thought was crazy because typically you feel homesick when you’re away from your home and just want to get back to it (as in physically go home) so I’m of the mindset that since I no longer have a physical home of my own, how can I be homesick. When I read my devotional today it ironically talked about home and what that feeling of home truly is. It said that Home is where we discover security and where we belong; home is where we find ourselves and feel love; home defines who we are. That’s what the home I lost was for me. It was where I grew up essentially (I’m not talking about childhood home obviously because that was a nightmare).

I was about 20 years old when I moved into that place with my then boyfriend who I realized the hard way, was not good for me. I was in that home when I realized that I had to teach myself how to love me with all of my imperfections and quirks. I was in that home when I had my daughter and started my own little family of just the two of us and decided I would be the mother to her that I wished I would have had. I was in that home when I, for the first time ever in my life, felt safe and secure and yes, at peace. Then in an instant it was all gone. That safety and security, that growth, that love that I had found in myself, that belief and confidence that I had found within me. Like the snap of a finger, just like that, it was gone.

I have been feeling really homesick lately because now I am not in a place where I feel secure and safe. I am not in a place where I feel loved. I am not in a place where I feel free to be myself. I am not in a place where I feel at peace and it’s frustrating. I don’t like living in survival mode, and I don’t like that my mental health is in constant jeopardy because of having to live in said survival mode. I’m trying to stay positive that things are going to turn out good in the end. I am a spiritual person so I am trying to have faith and believe that whatever storm God takes me through He will pull me through to the other side and won’t leave me.

However, I am struggling to hold onto that positive outlook. I am struggling to believe that all of this can somehow be for my betterment. That said, even though I am struggling to hold on to that faith and that positivity, I am still in fact holding on (for dear life mind you). I think it’s just in my nature to believe that there is a reason for everything.

I heard an interview Tyler Perry did the other day where he was talking about how all things work together for our good and it’s all there to teach us something, so he doesn’t see his failures as that. He sees them as a tool to teach him the lessons he needs to learn for the next venture. He also said something else that I thought was interesting. He doesn’t view closed doors in the way that most people (including myself) view them. He sees a closed door as a wall of a maze and when that wall goes up, blocking us from something that we want (or thought we wanted), it’s just a guidepost to redirect the course we are on so that we follow the new path and keep going. I found that interesting. There are no closed doors, we’re just in a maze and when an obstacle is thrown at us, we just have to redirect and find a new way to get to where it is we’re going.

I like that idea so much better than the image of door slamming in my face so I’m going to use that metaphor. From now on when I start to feel like that light at the end of the tunnel is becoming a lot dimmer and I’m not seeing a way out, I’ll just think of it as a maze. I’m not losing the light. The light is just shifting and changing where it wants me to find it. Yeah, I like that way of looking at it much better.

Until next time… #BeDiligent #BeConsistent #BeSteadfast

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Jimmetta Carpenter

CEO/Writer/Editor

Write 2 Be Media/Write 2 Be Magazine

The Standard in Which We Measure Ourselves

January 31, 2025 jcladyluv

I know the Golden Globes Awards show was a couple of weeks ago now, but I keep replaying Demi Moore’s acceptance speech because it was just so moving. My first thought was ‘wow, how is it that in all of the amazing movies that she’s done over her more than 45-year career, is this her first time ever winning an award’. My second thought was how is it that she never thought she was good enough to win one?

It made me think about the standards we tend to measure ourselves by and whether or not they are truly our standards or society’s standards. In her speech she mentioned something that someone told her regarding the thoughts surrounding being deemed “enough”. The woman told her that, in essence, she’ll never be enough but that if you just put down the measuring stick then you can learn and know the true value of your worth.

Society is always going to be (to use a football analogy—because I’ve been watching football a lot in the past few weekends lol) moving the chains of where you are supposed to be at any given time in life. You get to one place, and you think, man I’ve really done something, and I’ve accomplished something big. Then almost immediately that can change once you realize where the next goal post is and just how much further you might have to go in order to get there.

However, the flip side to that is that sometimes we don’t notice the movement we’ve actually made towards the goal line because we simply raised the standards for ourselves. If you think about it, rarely does anyone meet a milestone and then say that’s it, I’m good, no need to try for anything else. We tend to say okay, I got that now I’m going for something bigger, but we don’t seem to give ourselves the proper credit for achieving the first set of goals. We are measuring our level of success by the bigger goal without factoring in the movement we’ve made with the smaller one.

The way we measure ourselves or what we accomplish should not be according to the world’s measuring stick. The world will always leave you thinking that you haven’t done enough. We have to keep in mind the goals that we are striving for (not the ones others think we should be aiming for) and more importantly, we have to be aware of the value that is within us and what we bring into whatever space we enter. Our measurements should not be about the goals that we achieve because, as I said before, our goals will always change and that’s how it should be. Our measurement should be about how we feel about ourselves as we move those chains and achieve each milestone and the people who we take on the journey with us.

Until next time…#BeMindful #BeDetermined #BeAmbitious

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Jimmetta Carpenter

CEO/Writer/Editor

Write 2 Be Media/Write 2 Be Magazine

Taking Stock and Putting Things Into Perspective

December 30, 2024 jcladyluv

As this year winds down and comes to a close I find myself in the land of wishing. I wish this year had gone the way I wanted it to. I wish that I had published more. I wish that I had found a new home and not had to stay in what feels like a nightmare that I can’t wake up from (lots of stirred up childhood trauma here). I wish that I could have done more, been better, accomplished everything. I know, some of that seems unrealistic but have you met me. I tend to strive for the damn near impossible and I’m okay with that because in the end, if you shoot for the moon, even if you don’t make it there you will still land somewhere amongst the stars. Or something like that.

Anyway, I was feeling in a woe is me kind of mood tonight (I’m writing this on Christmas Eve, well technically it just turned midnight so it’s Christmas now) and to be honest I’m still there but I got to do one of my favorite Christmas Eve traditions that I didn’t get to do last year and that is watch It’s a Wonderful Life. It’s my favorite Christmas movie and I love more than anything, the overall message in the movie. Turns out my daughter has never seen the movie; she would usually always be in her room watching her own favorite Christmas things.

She had me explain what the movie was about tonight (because you know today’s generation knows next to nothing about good old black and white classic movies lol) and in explaining the message in the movie to her I found myself taking stock of what is good right now. In my explanation (by the way I did not do the best job of explaining this movie which is why I don’t write movie reviews lol) I summed it up by saying overall the movie teaches a lesson that no matter how bad you think you have it, no matter how much you think you don’t matter and there’s no one’s life you make more significant by being here, your life is so much better than you think. It’s all about perspective and how you choose to see things.

I heard myself when I explained that part to her and I thought, so why am I choosing to see this year as such a crappy year then (okay it was a crappy year but still). I need to shift my perspective. Sometimes all we need is to be shown things in a different light. We need to have a mirror held up to us, not necessarily just to show us our flaws and imperfections and show us the lessons that we need to learn. Often times that mirror can also reflect just how much you still have to be grateful for. Sort of the glass half full type of mindset.

Yes, I may still technically be homeless, but I do have a roof over my head. Yes, I am having to live in a nightmare and literally staring my trauma in the face on a day-to-day basis, but I realize that I am stronger now than I was when I was younger. Yes, I am in the midst of a depression (which does terrify me) but I feel that I have tools now that I didn’t have at sixteen or even in my early twenties (when darker thoughts almost won) that I believe can help me make it though, and I am making a plan of action to actually get myself into therapy next year. Yes, I have had all of these obstacles tossed at me on the journey to my dreams, but I can choose to see it as a weakness, or I can see it for what it is. Strength.

There is strength in surviving the experiences that you think will break you. The one’s that you think that you’re not really strong enough to handle. There is strength in knowing that you can’t do everything alone and that sometimes you are going to have to reach out to the people around you for help. There is strength in knowing that there are toxic people that are just never going to be in your corner and coming to terms with that and cutting them out of your life.

So, as this year comes to a close, I am taking stock in a lot of things. I can choose to see it one of two ways. I can zero in on everything that’s not going my way and all the things that have gone wrong in the past year and a half (or over the course of my life in general lol). Or I can look at it from the perspective that after everything I’ve been through, all that I’ve endured, or the mental and physical battles I have struggled through, I’m still here. I’m still powering through. I haven’t given up and that says something. That means something.

I hope that you will find that no matter what you think is wrong with your life, you being here to still make things better, you surviving another day, you being someone else’s inspiration, it all matters. It is a Wonderful Life, if that’s how you choose to see it.

Until next time… #BeMindful #BeEmpowered #BeMotivated

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Jimmetta Carpenter

CEO/Writer/Editor

Write 2 Be Media/Write 2 Be Magazine

The Reality I’m Left With

November 25, 2024 jcladyluv

I’d like to think I’m someone who goes after all of my dreams, but the reality is that I’m not. I’ve had so many dreams that I never even tried to attain, all because I let the words of a woman who was supposed to be my biggest supporter in life halt me in my tracks. Growing up my mother used to tell me all of the things I would never be able to accomplish and somewhere along the way I started to believe her and it then became my own belief.

I can’t blame her completely because at a certain age one would think that I would have been able to tune her out, but I never did. Her words always lingered in the back of my mind and with every no, and every rejection that came my way, I started to think she must be right. That the dreams I had were pointless all along. I mean, you tend to think the people who are supposed to always believe in you and your abilities and tell you to shoot for the moon are your parents right? So, what they say must be true, right? I know I always make sure to tell my daughter that there isn’t anything she can’t do if she puts her mind to it. Because you aren’t supposed to run around crushing your child’s dreams. The world is already going to try and do that anyway.

The reality is I did not have that kind of parent who fostered and nurtured my creativity, and I don’t really know why that is. Only she can answer why she purposely tried to tear me down instead of build me up. I realize now, perhaps far too late for it to make a difference, that you should never let someone else’s opinions of you and what you can do alter what you know and believe for yourself. Even if it’s family. I could be so much more than I am right now if I had only let my own belief in me overshadow my mother’s disbelief in me.

The reality is that I am where I am in life because I lost faith, in myself and in the purpose that I believe God has for me in this world. Too many times I let what someone else said or thought I couldn’t do take away my power to even try. I am a big believer in the fact that once you have made yourself aware of where you need to improve things, that awareness will then provide you with the strength you need to take actions that will make things better. As much as I don’t like change, I know that one change I must make is to stop letting the hurtful words of others, family or not, linger in the back of my mind and dictate what I believe about myself.

I know me. I know who God created and what He created me for. I know that He did not bring me through everything that I have been through to just give up and because I know that there are people far older than I am who have pursued dreams that others also thought to be impossible, I know that what I want is not out of the realm of possibility. It doesn’t matter that one person tried their hardest to break me and break my spirit. I may bend but I will not break. I didn’t come this far to give up now.

For anyone who has let other people’s harmful words affect the way you feel about the visions you have for your life, it’s not too late to change that. Don’t give anyone else power over what you know your purpose is. They say that hurt people, hurt people, so maybe that is the excuse for those who have tried to diminish other’s ambitions, but you don’t have to let them succeed in their goal by believing a single thing they have to say. Misery loves company but you don’t have to be the company that misery is seeking to keep.

Until next time… #BeFearless #BeMindful #BeResilient

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Jimmetta Carpenter

CEO/Writer/Editor

Write 2 Be Media/Write 2 Be Magazine

The Re-Run That Most of Us Never Asked For

November 6, 2024 jcladyluv

I would say this feels like 2016 all over again, except this feels much worse. I have been trying to figure out how to convey what I’m feeling into words all night and all morning and to say I am deeply saddened, thoroughly disgusted, and extremely terrified would be a gross understatement. Maya Angelou has a famous quote that says if someone shows you who they are, believe them. He showed us who he was, and I believe him. Now the vast majority of American people have showed me who they really are by voting this vile, disgusting, trash human being into office.

Let’s tell the truth right here and right now. It was never about Biden’s age because that man is about to be the oldest President this country has ever had. It’s not about the economy because world renowned economists have said that man’s economic plan for his second term will likely send this country into an economic downward spiral. It’s the racism and misogyny of it all. The people in this supposed great country would rather put a rapist, twice impeached, CONVICTED FELON, in office then elect a more than competent, highly capable woman of color. But y’all want us to just move on from that like it’s nothing.

People chose to put money over human rights. You felt better under Trump’s economy, but apparently you’re forgetting that his economy was the one he inherited from Obama. And because the amazing things Biden did for this economy will only start to take effect and be felt more in the next four years, once again you will be fooled into thinking that somehow it was this man’s economic plan that did it and just disregard what Biden actually did for this country. When your daughters, wives, sisters, and mothers, have their healthcare put in jeopardy because of this man’s stance on women having autonomy over their own bodies, just remember this is what you wanted.

I am worried about mine and my daughter’s rights. I am worried about our healthcare. I am worried about our quality of life being people of color in this country. I am worried about my friends who are also people of color. I am worried about my friends who are in the LGBTQ community that they won’t feel safe anywhere they go. I am worried for my friends who are immigrants or have loved ones in their lives that are immigrants. I am worried about my friends with varying disabilities, that they won’t be able to have the heath care that they not only need but deserve to have. Frankly, I am worried about this country as a whole.

I am a fighter so I know that I will get to a point where I can move past this despair that I feel to my core. However, that is not where I am at today, right now, and in this moment. Today I am feeling discouraged, I am feeling let down, and I am feeling all kinds of betrayed. I am feeling disgusted, I am feeling enraged. And I am going to let myself have these feelings today, hell maybe even tomorrow, or the rest of the week.

That said, the fight is definitely not over, and as the woman who should have been our next President said over the course of her campaign, ‘When we fight we win’ and while that win may not come for another 2 years (mid-term elections for Congress) or even another 4 years, the fight is only just beginning. We have so much more work to do to make this country what it should and could be. Stay strong everyone.

Until next time… #BeStrong #BeBrave #BeDetermined #WhenWeFightWeWin

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Jimmetta Carpenter

CEO/Writer/Editor

Write 2 Be Media/Write 2 Be Magazine

I Am More Than the Battles I Didn’t Win

August 19, 2024 jcladyluv

It feels like it’s been so long since I’ve written here and updated you. I have been busy, or at least I’ve been trying to be as productive as I possibly can. I published a book at the end of July called ‘The Weight of HER’ (you can check it out on this link) and that was really exciting and I’m so happy that it’s out into the world for everyone to share in this story that has lived in my head for a very long time now. Some would say that I should still be reveling in celebratory bliss and taking in the accomplishment that is publishing a book (because it is definitely not for the faint of heart). I’m pretty sure if it was one of my friends, or hell, anyone else for that matter, I would say the same thing to them. Yet all I can think about is the books that I had planned to publish this year that I’m not going to be able to publish.

Now there’s still one more coming this year (come hell or high water) but in my plan I had envisioned myself publishing at the very least 4 this year. 2 novels, 1 non-fiction essay style book for writers, and a collection of poetry and essays (sort-of memoir-sh). I know that I should be thankful I was able to publish one book and will likely be able to get another one out there…and don’t get me wrong, I am! It’s just setbacks always make me feel like a failure.

Instinctively, I know that we can’t always plan for everything and honestly life would be pretty boring if there were no spontaneity. However, I am a planner to my core. I can envision a dream and believe that it’s possible all day long but if I don’t create a plan to make that vision happen and have a visual representation for the steps I need to take to see that plan through then I get stuck. Then to have that plan be thrown off track by life’s inevitable obstacles, oftentimes leaves me paralyzed. By the time I get unstuck and accomplish one of the things on my list (because y’all know I love my lists) the feeling of being a failure has already set in and it’s a hard feeling to shake.

I have a really wonderful friend who said that I should start making lists (because she knows how I am about my lists lol) of all of the accomplishments that I get done. The things that I manage to achieve despite the curve balls that life has continued to keep throwing me, or the physical limitations that I have developed over the last several years, or the pain that I now feel on an almost daily basis. She even started rattling off some of those things that, while I didn’t forget them, I just didn’t seem to count them. In essence she told me to stop selling myself short and she’s right. I underestimate myself a lot and I think it’s one of those things that if you’ve done it for so long, it is a behavior that is hard to unlearn. I am going to really try my hardest to remember ALL of who I am, and not just the things that I am not.

There are battles that we all face every day. One’s that people know all about and help pull us through. And the one’s that no one else ever sees and that we carry on our own. No matter what the obstacles are, whether you push through it, slide under it, go around it, or just step over it, the point is that you make it to the other side. It doesn’t matter how long it takes you to make it there. It’s the fact that you will have made it. That you accomplished the things you set out to do. Maybe not in the time that you wanted to, but you will eventually be able to add it to your growing list of things you achieved in life. Just remember in the journey to get to the reward that is our dreams, we are more than the battles that we have had to face to get there.

Until next time… #BeFearless #BePersistent #BeVictorious

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Jimmetta Carpenter

CEO/Writer/Editor

Write 2 Be Media/Write 2 Be Magazine

Waiting Out the Storm Is Not Procrastination

July 15, 2024 jcladyluv

Writing can sometimes be seen as a mountain and the journey to become a successful writer can oftentimes be a treacherous climb. I procrastinate far more than I should but it is never for lack of ideas or lack of motivation so to speak. Sometimes I’m just trying to process where I’m at, get familiar with my new surroundings, catch my breath, and get up the nerve to keep on climbing.

It’s odd that I’m using a climbing metaphor here, given that I am deathly afraid of heights, but I got the inspiration for this post from a chat on a writer’s stream. It was a day when no one in the chat particularly felt like writing and usually when that happens it’s seen as one procrastinating. Someone very wise and motivating said that it is not procrastinating to wait out the storm. I love that and it made me feel mildly better about my act of doing nothing that evening, which I guess I needed that permission.

I think procrastinating is something that the world tells us that we’re doing if we are somehow not being busy enough and aren’t seen doing something that society deems as productive. The thing about being a writer, or a creative person in general, is that sometimes when we are seen to be doing nothing, we are actually at the height of our creativity. Words don’t just pour onto the page out of nowhere (okay sometimes they do but still, go with me here), they are typically formed in our minds first. We spend a lot of time thinking of what we want to say or how we want to say it before the words ever come out on a page.

Now I’m not an artist and I can’t draw worth anything, but I imagine that it’s somewhat that way for artists as well. So yes, we daydream, we stare out of windows, we lie down and stare at the ceiling, sometimes we just need a day to veg out on TV shows and movies but not to waste time and do nothing. These are things that fuel our creativity. They fill up or creative well so that we can create again because the well can run dry and that is exactly what we don’t want.

We encounter a lot of storms in life. I feel like it’s somehow meant to be that way. With no storm, comes no adversity, and with no adversity, comes no battles, and without any battles, there are no victories to be won. Does that mean that we’re always going to be in some kind of fight? Possibly? I mean if you’re a dreamer, you’re sort of always in a fight, aren’t you? One to make people see what you see or believe in you the way you believe in yourself. Sometimes the fight is quite literally within yourself.

But no matter what storm you are struggling with, know that it is okay to take a moment, find a safe spot to catch your breath, and just wait out the storm. It’s not being lazy. It’s not procrastinating. It’s not giving up. It is simply what it sounds like, waiting for the storm to pass so that you can finish making the climb all the way to the top, where your dreams are waiting for you.

Until next time… #BeDiligent #BeBold #BeFearless

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Jimmetta Carpenter

CEO/Writer/Editor

Write 2 Be Media/Write 2 Be Magazine

This Too Shall Pass…Or At Least That’s What I’m Told

June 3, 2024 jcladyluv

I was listening to a podcast earlier this morning and it was talking about adversities and about getting to that place in which, even in an anxious state, you can say okay, I’m here and it’s okay because this will not last. This place of endless obstacles and feeling like I’m being tested will not be a constant. This is only for right now and it is arguably preparing you for something far greater than you could have ever imagined. Notably, it won’t feel that way while you’re in that state but as the saying goes, this too shall pass.

What I struggle with is what to do while I am in the midst of those obstacles. What do I do with those feelings of hopelessness and despair. How do I get to that place where I can see the good of all that I’m going through and the inevitable betterment that it will provide me. The logical side of me knows that this is all happening to teach me something and to grow me into a better, stronger, more resilient person. But as I’ve said here before, I’m not always logical in my thinking. Particularly when I’m in a state of depression, I don’t think in the most rational terms, and everything seems like it’s going to get worse without ever getting better. I try to stay positive but some days it’s harder than others to see the purpose in all of this.

That being said, I am a person of faith, even in the instances where my faith starts to slide a little because I find myself wishing I could ask God why He thinks I’m strong enough to go through all of this. Even then, I still know that there is a reason that I am here, a reason for everything that I’ve been through. Maybe it’s to prepare me for greater things but maybe it’s just so I can be there for someone else getting ready to go through their own obstacle course in life so they can know they’re not alone and that they can get through it just like I will.

That’s the interesting thing that I’m realizing about adversity. Sometimes it has nothing to do with you necessarily, as much as it has to do with those you are meant to guide through their own dark tunnel. Now I don’t know if I’m the right guide for anyone honestly but if that’s the purpose God has for me, I will gladly take on that role. Now do I wish I had a little less adversity of my own to deal with? Sure. But do I think that whatever God is up there planning is far better than any plans that I have of my own? Absolutely! I guess I’ll just have to wait for this storm to pass to see clearly what God has in store once I make it through. For now, I’ll just keep pushing forward and walking towards the light at the end of this very long, winding, dark tunnel. If you’re going through your own dark tunnel, just know that you aren’t alone in your struggle.

Until next time… #BeDiligent #BeBrave #BeDetermined

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Jimmetta Carpenter

CEO/Writer/Editor

Write 2 Be Media/Write 2 Be Magazine

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The Training Ground That is Adversity

May 13, 2024 jcladyluv

If adversity is a training ground for eventual success, then I have been in intense preparation for years and once I reach whatever success actually is I am going to be the most prepared a person could ever be. At least that is how it feels when it seems like there is an obstacle or stumbling block around every corner. I’m coming up on a year since the bottom was essentially ripped out from underneath my life and I lost my home and more than 20 years’ worth of memories. To say that I am not looking forward to May 19^th would be an understatement. I’ve had a lot of times in my life where I have felt like a failure but never more than that day when I literally lost everything. Or at least it felt as if I lost everything.

However, looking back, I see clearly that I didn’t lose everything, at least not the things that truly count anyway. I lost material possessions sure, but the things that I have always held within, strength, tenacity, courage, passion for my writing (which okay, it slowed a lot because, you know, trauma), and my faith; those things never went anywhere. While sure some days my faith has definitely been tested, and I’ve had days where I look to God and ask why He thinks I can handle this level of adversity because I don’t believe I’m THAT strong, it is mostly still intact.

I know that everything you go through in life is supposed to teach you something and we should never be at a point where we stop learning. If I had to guess what this period in my life was meant to teach me (which one could argue I’m still resisting the lesson lol), it would be that change is inevitable and that you can’t fight against it because it is ultimately for your betterment. If you have been following along with my journey and this blog for years then you know, I HATE CHANGE. I’m a very routine person and I am very averse to things around me changing, even if I know the change is good. I like to know what to expect, and I like things to be the way I believe they will work best for me. No variation, no room for even a slight difference in what I’ve grown accustomed to. The problem is (and logically I’m aware of this) that life doesn’t work best when things stay the same all the time.

Not to say routine isn’t good but you should allow for changes because change can be good too. Instinctively I know this. Some of the best things I’ve had happen in my life have been due to drastic changes and yet still, I don’t like for things to change. I’ve heard people often say that when you’re not making the changes that God wants you to make so that you can fulfill the purpose, he has for you then He will find a way (or the Universe will) to make you have to move in the direction you need to go. I’m starting to feel like what happened to me last year was a way to make the changes in my life happen whether I wanted them to or not.

There are specific things that have already shifted, most likely for the better, that I had been resistant to changing until the situation that happened changed things for me. Would certain realizations have happened if this situation hadn’t forced things to change? Probably not. Simple changes that needed to be made, that I had been refusing to make on my own (I won’t get into all of it because the list is long lol), some beliefs that I had been holding onto about myself that simply weren’t true. I kept resisting certain changes that were necessary and the Universe found the most dramatic way to tell me that you may not like change but you’re going to have no choice now. I feel like the Universe was a little overly dramatic here, but the message has been received.

I am trying to grow more, in many ways. I am trying to not see change as the enemy and adapt to it more. Mostly because now I simply have no choice as there are changes happening all the time now that I can’t avoid. I am trying to understand that while having a routine is certainly not a bad thing, neither is changing things on a whim. I am trying to see the good things that change can bring and embrace them instead of ward them off and rebelling against them.

I was reminded yesterday of a quote from a young lady who auditioned for America’s Got Talent. Her name was Jane, but she went by the name Nightbirde and she was there going for her dreams even though she was diagnosed with a terminal brain cancer that only gave her a 2% chance to live. She said that you can’t wait until life isn’t hard anymore before you decide to be happy. These words brought me to tears the first time I heard her say them and even more so yesterday when I was reminded of them.

Times are hard right now for me. Even though I am in what some people will see as a more stable situation because I’m not still in a hotel room waiting for a knock at the door. Things are still hard right now and there are some days where better just seems so far off. But I don’t want to wait for that far off better day in order to find things that make me happy. I can’t wait for a better that may be further away than I care to admit because that’s a long time to not be happy. So, I’m taking in stride this training ground that is my adversity and I’m just going to find some small thing that makes me happy each day to get through each battle as they come. I want you to know that while the battles may keep coming your way, the choice in how you face them is yours. Choose to be happy now, especially when life is hard. Just remember, hard times don’t last always. Remember to take care of yourselves.

Until Next Time… #BeDiligent #BeMindful #BeCourageous

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Jimmetta Carpenter

CEO/Writer/Editor

Write 2 Be Media/Write 2 Be Magazine

Sometimes There’s Beauty in Being Broken

March 25, 2024 jcladyluv

“There’s a crack in everything. That’s how the light gets in.” ~ Leonard Cohen

I saw this trailer for a television show that mentioned this Japanese phrase “Kintsugi” which translates to the belief that something broken is stronger and more beautiful because of its imperfections, the history attached to it, and its altered state. It was mentioned initially in the context of talking about the Japanese art form of using liquid gold to join broken pieces of pottery together. It was also used in talking about people and how they see imperfections, both in others and in themselves.

It got me to thinking about all the things we think of as our breaking points. Things that we see as the worst moments in our lives. That leave us feeling shattered into a million tiny pieces. We spend a lot of time trying to fix the things that are broken. To put back together the pieces of all the things that keep falling apart around us. Trying to make them as close to ‘perfect’ as they once were. We never seem to take stock in the beauty that presents itself after the breaking has been done.

What makes us, as human beings, truly beautiful is our uniqueness and the imperfect parts of ourselves. We as a society tend to think we want the perfect life, the perfect friend, the perfect partner, or even the perfect career, but is that what we really want? Would we work as hard at our relationships and friendships and the careers that we are so passionate about if it all remained so perfectly in tact and unbroken?

There’s no uniqueness in that. No excitement. There’s nothing extraordinary about things that are perfect. There’s a reason why we oftentimes seek out the unique and odd things. Why we’re so enticed by things that are rare. Why the imperfect moments in our lives stand out so much. Yeah, a part of it is because of how much those moments may break us down. But the other part of that is in the strength that we gather within ourselves to build things back up. Not just build to make us whole again but also to make us better.

Sometimes the things that were meant to break us turn into blessings that we never realized we needed. It never quite feels that way at the time but after reflection you start to realize that oftentimes the changes that we needed to make in our lives, both for ourselves and the people around us, wouldn’t have happened had our hand not been forced. There are even times that, had our walls not crumbled around us, we may not have even realized just how much we needed to change to begin with. In some instances, it is those walls that needed to come down to begin with in order to give us the best possible chance at true growth and development.

Broken does not mean worthless. Broken does not mean there is no longer any purpose. Broken does not mean things are not repairable. Broken just means a little bruised or a little damaged and aren’t we all in some way a little bit damaged? Things that have been broken still hold value. We, who have been broken, still hold value. So, the next time you break something, and you think that it’s just no longer any good, the next time you yourself feel like you’ve been broken beyond repair and are of no use, take a step back. Look at the pieces and how they fit now and treasure the new pattern that those pieces now make. Cherish the beauty that now presents itself, not the same as before, but now more unique than it ever was.

Until next time… #BeImperfect #BeUnique #BeResilient

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Jimmetta Carpenter

CEO/Writer/Editor

Write 2 Be Media/Write 2 Be Magazine

The Words You Speak Matter

March 4, 2024 jcladyluv

So, the thing about being back in a situation that you know is toxic out of necessity is that it often times makes you feel powerless and like there’s nothing within your control. Even if things seem slightly decent in the beginning (I mean aside from being constantly miserable because the situation sucks) you know that inevitably the same toxic nature that you worked so hard to escape for years and years on end and to emotionally work past will render its ugly head.

So since being back under the same roof with my mother, I have been uncomfortable, not happy, and made to feel small all over again on a regular basis. Having said that I’ve been trying to make the best out of terrible circumstances because there’s just no other choice right now while I’m working to get back on my feet. I smile hoping that will make me feel better because I know that things could be worse. I also smile to keep myself from crying because that won’t do me any good either. However, in moments when my mother says things that seem purposely designed to be hurtful, the emotions from trauma resurface and there’s just no controlling how insignificant I feel.

The other day, when I chose to buy myself a pair of pajamas on clearance to celebrate me writing over 11,000 words last week, she took the time to remind me that the words I’m writing aren’t currently making me any money, thus being pointless. When I responded with the fact that well if I don’t write then I can’t put any books out to buy, her counterpoint was to say that no one is buying my books anyway so is there a point. Fact of the matter is that while I’m not rolling in the dough from my books (clearly, or I wouldn’t be in my current situation) and I’m not making money hand over fist, there are in fact people that have bought my books. I just watched a panel discussion this past weekend on AuthorTube where someone did in fact buy and read my novel and it seemed as if they actually liked it.

I didn’t bother highlighting this to my mother because honestly it wouldn’t have made any difference to her because clearly my art, my creativity, is worthless in her eyes. I simply said to her “you say the nicest things” with every ounce of sarcasm that I could muster. Then I proceeded to go in the room with my daughter, sit down, and out of nowhere came the tears. My daughter then came and hugged me because she, hearing this whole exchange and being a creative herself, understood the hurt. One could say I should be well past the point where her words can hurt me, but I guess I am not. Words hurt. It’s why words matter so much and what you say to people matter. They can be what motivates a person to keep pushing forward or they can be what causes a person to quit.

There are two kinds of people in this world. The kind that go out of their way to think of the positive thing to say that will help someone see their potential and the light they hold within them. Or the kind of person (like my mother), who goes out of their way to say things they know will hurt someone simply because they don’t care about the feelings of others. They don’t see people’s potential or their light, only their mistakes and their weaknesses. I strive to see the light in others and in myself and I hope that I always remain that kind of person. There’s just no reason to say hurtful things to people just because you can. It serves no purpose.

When I told one of my closest friends about this exchange his words to me were to “use the sludge of that disrespect as fuel to push forward on the next night that I think I’m out of steam.” My favorite thing that he said to me (which may just now be my new motto) is to stay driven on rage and f*ck yous. To let that “dismissive bullshit” be the catalyst that makes me push harder. One thing is for damn sure. I have to hurry up and get the hell out of here or else her need to crush my dreams and my spirit is going to eat away at my soul. So, I am going to stay driven on that rage and those f*ck yous that I would say if she was anyone else but who she is. That’s all I have to share for now. Thank you for letting me vent here and remember that the words you say to the people in your lives matters, so make sure you are careful about what those words are.

Until next time… #BeEmpowered #BeBold #BeMotivated

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Jimmetta Carpenter

CEO/Writer/Editor

Write 2 Be Media/Write 2 Be Magazine

Joy In the Little Things

January 5, 2024 jcladyluv

When it comes to welcoming in a New Year, I am normally very excited with anticipation for whatever is going to come. This year, while I am happy that we are no longer in 2023 (also known as the worst year of my life) I am hesitant to let myself get excited. Not because I don’t wish for good things but just because last year left me feeling a little banged up and bruised and I’m questioning if good things are actually coming. Now that I’ve gotten those feelings out there and can let that go, I will say that I am still holding out lots of optimism for things to turn around and get better this year. I have plans and goals as always, but I did opt to do my goals quarterly this year instead of for the entire year.

My word for the year is Joy and that is what I would like to welcome more of this year. More moments in which I experience the Joys of life and appreciate the happiness that I get from the little things. I want to achieve successes and get some big wins this year but I don’t want to miss out on the smaller, more joyous moments that will undoubtedly come along in pursuit of those things.

Oftentimes we miss the delight that should be felt from little things like walking outside and feeling the sun on your face, or just being able to catch up with an old friend that you hadn’t spoken to in a while. These are precious moments and I hope not to take those for granted anymore because I think I didn’t treasure them enough before. This year I want to hold on to those smaller moments on my way to those bigger ones. After all, aren’t the big moments in our lives just made up of a bunch of smaller ones that happened along the way to make the big dreams possible?

I suppose that is how I also want to look at accomplishing my goals for the year as well. I have some big things that I would like to get accomplished. Let’s face it, I have always been a big goal type of person. What I am usually not as great at is breaking those goals down into the smaller tasks that make it possible for those bigger goals to come to fruition. I am going to try and be better this year about concentrating on the smaller tasks that will ultimately get me to those larger goals. Breaking down my goals into those smaller tasks will not only allow me to better achieve my overall goals but also allow me to enjoy the feeling of accomplishment along the way of the larger journey to the end goal (if that makes sense).

I guess all of that was to say, or to remind everyone as well as myself, not to forget to take pleasure and joy in the little moments in life. Don’t take the smaller victories and milestones for granted in pursuit of the bigger, more elaborate, goals. Every single moment we get on this earth is precious and just because they may not be big and grandiose does not mean that they shouldn’t be treasured and that we shouldn’t take stock in the Joy that they give us. Happy New Year everyone and may 2024 bring all of you small moments of immense Joy and Happiness.

Until next time… #BeMindful #BeOptimistic #BeHappy

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Jimmetta Carpenter

CEO/Writer/Editor

Write 2 Be Media/Write 2 Be Magazine

Here’s to the Month of Planning and the Next Chapter

December 1, 2023 jcladyluv

I can’t believe it’s December already! November was a very hard month, and with the year I’ve had, that’s saying something. Along with the current situation I’ve been in now since the end of May and the fact that it doesn’t seem like it will be getting better before the year is out, I have had to recover from an emergency surgery I certainly didn’t expect to need. I suppose what the circumstances around my surgery taught me was that whatever is meant to happen will happen regardless and sometimes it could be for the better in the end.

Now I don’t mean that having to have emergency surgery is ever a good thing. Of course not. But I was going to just ignore the abdominal pain that I was in. I was going to tough it out and keep pushing forward to try and deal with the life that was crumbling in around me the best I can despite that pain that had decided to pop up out of nowhere. If it weren’t for my daughter insisting that I go to the hospital I would have kept pushing and who knows what would have happened. The doctor certainly seemed to be convinced that had I waited even one more day there could have been dire consequences, and apparently, I had had a hernia for quite some time and just never knew it. The problem was there, just lying dormant, and only just then came to the surface.

I’ve never been very good at taking things easy and sitting down and just resting. I mean even on days that I designate as self-care days I still find myself planning things out that are writing (thus work) related and just doing things to keep busy despite the resting I’m supposed to be doing. The surgery (and perhaps in some way, the Universe) made me have to rest and have to simply be still. It drove me crazy to not be able to do the things that I was used to doing. To not be able to do things for myself and have to rely on other people (mainly my daughter) for help with basic things was frustrating to say the least. The first few weeks I couldn’t even drive which, if you know anything about me, is my peace and my escape when things feel crazy.

I can honestly look back now and say it was probably what I needed. To just have to sit, to rest, to think through things without multi-tasking, to not always be busy with something. To really, truly, just be STILL. I’ve heard that sometimes when you’re not listening to your body and what it’s telling you that the universe will find a way to make you listen. I can confirm, this is true. And guess what. While I was being still, well things didn’t necessarily get any better, situation wise, but they didn’t get any worse either.

Having said all of that, December is typically a planning month for me. It’s where I usually get excited about planning the coming year. It’s when I let my optimism take over and get really hopeful for the good things I think are to come. While my situation this past year has put a slight damper on that optimism, I am still who I am. Meaning I’m still going to make plans and I’m still going to strive for a better year to come.

I can’t say I’m filled with as much hope as I normally would be during this time of year, but I do have a lot of Faith that fills in where hope leaves off and I’m going to run with that Faith. I have Faith that since God hasn’t left my side yet, He’s definitely not going to leave me now. I have Faith that all that I lost this past year will be replaced and replenished with better and more abundant things than I could have even imagined for myself.

A childhood friend of mine told me that when I come out on the other side of this, I’m going to have one hell of a testimony and perhaps that is the reason for all of this happening. I have Faith that my story is only going to get better from here. That it will somehow be an inspiration for others to know that no matter what storms you go through in life, there will be a rainbow on the other side of that storm. This is just another chapter and I’m going to look forward to seeing what the next chapter holds for me. Here’s to next year, and the next chapter, being amazing for us all!

Until next time… #BeOptimistic #BeHopeful #BeMindful

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Jimmetta Carpenter

CEO/Writer/Editor

Write 2 Be Media/Write 2 Be Magazine

Hello November! Time to Play Catch Up

November 1, 2023 jcladyluv

I know I don’t usually write a blog post on a Wednesday, but I haven’t written to you guys in a while, and I figured that today was as good a time as any to catch you up on things in my little corner of the world. I’m still without a home and as much as I would like to be optimistic and say things are looking up, I don’t feel that in this moment of my writing this. I haven’t given up hope or anything, it’s just that the situation is wearing me down in a way I would care not to admit. But here is where I admit the scary things that I don’t like to say out loud to my closest friends (and yes, I understand the irony of me not saying things out loud to people I know yet screaming it into the void that is the Internet lol).

I’m always seen as the positive one and while most days that is me and I do like to keep a positive tone, that just can’t be me every day. I also forget to mention that a little over two weeks ago I had emergency surgery. Yep, as if I didn’t have enough to deal with, I now have to deal with recovering from surgery. I suppose it’s the Universe’s way of sitting me down and giving me a way to rest my body, my spirit, and my soul but it sure picked a very odd time to sit me down in a time in which I need to be on the go to figure out next steps.

I don’t know, perhaps it was its way of really making me be still and letting God do His work in whatever way that shaped up to be. I have caught up on an enormous amount of rest, so I suppose there’s that. I feel more rested now than I have in years. The brain fog from the surgery doesn’t really help with my creativity but I am starting to feel that slowly come back as well (hence me being able to write up this post). I guess I can say that I am hanging in there but it’s by a very thin thread and I’m not sure how much longer I can hold on. I’m doing my best and that’s all I can do right now.Anywho, it’s November now and that means it is NaNoWriMo season in which millions of writers are just disillusioned enough to think they can write an entire novel in a month (just kidding about the disillusionment, it’s totally doable lol) so they sign up for 30 days of writing nearly 2,000 words a day until the task is done.

Normally I would be (officially) participating in this event but as you might guess, this year has kicked my behind and I just don’t have it in me to do it this year. Well at least not officially. That’s to say I can’t help myself and am deciding to be a rebel of sorts and unofficially do NaNo and will work on finally finishing up the revisions on my novel that was technically supposed to be published by now (more on that in another post).

So that’s what my November is going to look like. An unofficial NaNo revision project and finishing up my recovery from surgery. I know I normally set far more monthly goals for myself, but I think those two are good enough this month. I hope you all are well and if you are participating in NaNo let me know. I hope to write again a lot sooner.

Until next time… #BeAuthentic #BeEmpowered #BeFearless

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Jimmetta Carpenter

CEO/Writer/Editor

Write 2 Be Media/Write 2 Be Magazine

Let the Leaves Fall Away While the Roots Sustain You

September 4, 2023 jcladyluv

Losing a relationship with someone, especially a close friendship can be hard. If you’re anything like me, someone who believes in working hard at the close connections you have and that those bonds take work, then it’s extremely hard. However, sometimes instead of trying so hard to hold onto those particular relationships, we have to see them for what they are. Some people were meant to be in your life for a moment in time. Some are meant to be there for a season, sometimes many seasons of your life. Then there are those that are like the roots, and they are there for a lifetime.

You don’t get many of those root people and what you may not see is that the time you spend trying to hold onto the person that was meant to only be seasonal, you could be damaging the relationship you have with the roots. I have been blessed to have a lot of really amazing people enter my life and the thing about me is that I am a person who has a hard time truly letting people in so when I do, I tend to hold on pretty tightly. I don’t call too many people friend, not lightly, so when I use that word, it means I feel a deep connection with you. Which is why it is hard when that friend that I now see was just a seasonal friend, essentially decides that I’m no longer good enough to be their friend.

Now hear me when I say I know that I am a good enough person to be anyone’s friend and that just because I am going through a very hard time right now does not make me less than worthy. It doesn’t mean that it doesn’t hurt when someone tries to make you feel exactly that way because suddenly your life got too hard for them. Their loss, not mine. It just made me see even more in depth who my real friends are and who they are not. Real friends help you see the light that you are.

On those dark days they help you get to the other side of that dark tunnel and allow you to see there are people who care about you and not what you have (or in my case what I don’t have). Real friends are there to lift you up emotionally when you need it and know when to take a step back when you need that too. Real, true friends help you see things outside of your comfort zone and they see what sometimes others are too busy or just too selfish to see. They see the potential in you that oftentimes your own family doesn’t even see.

I have been fortunate enough to have some real friends by my side through this dark time and I am so happy that they have been there for me. That they haven’t abandoned me. That they, on the days when it’s really hard to, they help me see the good in myself, and even point out the good that’s happened around me in spite of all of the bad. They have helped keep me focused on the things I can accomplish instead of dwelling on what I can’t get done. They have reminded me that I am not my situation. I am much more than that. I’m very thankful for them. I hope everyone has real friends like them. Having a tribe supporting you can sometimes make a world of difference in how you choose to respond to the things that are happening around you.

Let the leaves (false friends) fall away from you and accept that their time in your life is now up. Take stock of those roots that decided to plant themselves around you and gave you the nourishment that you needed to grow and flourish. We can’t do everything alone in this life and in the worst times that you will face, it will be those roots that will keep you grounded and push you forward when you feel you can’t move on your own.

Until next time… #BeMindful #BeResilient #BeEncouraged

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Jimmetta Carpenter

CEO/Writer/Editor

Write 2 Be Media/Write 2 Be Magazine

When Expectation is Hit With Reality

August 28, 2023 jcladyluv

“Stop waiting for life to meet your expectations and start adjusting your expectations to meet life.”

~unknown

I’ve had two not so subtle reminders in the past few days that I shouldn’t be so hard on myself about not accomplishing the things that I had initially planned to get done this year. First, I had a very interesting conversation with one of my closest friends last week (you know who you are lol) about why my expectations don’t match up with my reality. A part of the reason I’ve been so frustrated with myself lately, well aside from everything I’m stressed about in my current situation, is because I’m not meeting my own expectations. Now these are expectations that I have placed on myself mind you, not expectations from others. This wonderful friend ever so slightly (okay not slightly, very bluntly) pointed out that my whole life was upended three months ago, and I wasn’t in the greatest position even before that (clearly) so why would I expect so many of the things on my great giant to-do list of life to have been possible. They impressed upon me that I need to live in the present and the reality of what is and not be so hung up on what “should” be when there is no one saying it should be this way or that way but me.

Then yesterday I watched a video by Sarra Cannon (Heart Breathings on YouTube) about how we can’t get hung up on where we aren’t in our lives because then we miss the moment that we are in. Basically, that living in the expectation of who we should be, of where we should be, doesn’t do anything but leave us stuck and spinning our wheels. It makes us long for a version of ourselves that simply doesn’t exist and, in all honesty, may have never existed anywhere but in our own imaginations. What both her and my friend were saying was to stop playing that comparison game, with others and with the version of myself that I wished I was, because it only leads to a feeling of inadequacy and a feeling that I’m not doing enough. That I’m just not enough.

It is true that I have extremely high expectations of myself. I’m not sure if that’s mostly just because I have a lot I want to do before my time is up on this earth, or if it has more to do with always being made to feel like no one expected very much out of me at all. Whatever the reason, I have always had massively long lists of things to get accomplished and milestones that I wanted to hit by certain points in my life. I have always had a certain legacy that I wanted to be remembered for and that legacy required, at least in my mind anyway, having accomplished a lot. I wanted to make sure that I put out enough good in this world to make a difference.

As I was doing my devotional this morning it also reminded me that God’s ultimate plan for my life, for our lives, goes beyond the vision that he has given us. That He positions us within this world as a singular point of light, a beacon if you will. We are all here to be a light in this world and to be that beacon for others, perhaps other people who are also going through dark times. It makes sense that in order to be someone else’s light source in the dark, that we must first find our own way through that same darkness. In essence, it doesn’t matter just how much or how little we do. What matters most are the lives we are able to touch. It’s something that I will definitely remember in those moments when I think that I’m not doing enough, or that I’m not putting enough good out into the world. I have to learn that in my journey, what I expect and what is realistic are not always one in the same, and that’s okay. I hope that my journey through this dark time can be that beacon for someone else.

Until next time… #BeMindful #BePresent #BeGrateful

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Jimmetta Carpenter

CEO/Writer/Editor

Write 2 Be Media/Write 2 Be Magazine

When Your Pride Gets Too Heavy to Carry

August 14, 2023 jcladyluv

Pride is a funny thing. They tell you to take pride in yourself for so many things but then when you do have pride people tell you the opposite. They say don’t be so prideful that you end up worse off than if you had just swallowed your pride to begin with. If there is anything that this situation I have been going through since the end of May has taught me is that pride really does have to go out the window sometimes because, what’s that other saying I love so much? Oh yeah, closed mouths don’t get fed.

I mean there is truth to that. No one knows you’re struggling or in need if you don’t say anything. Even in the midst of your struggle, people can be misled to think that things are improving and that you may not need as much help anymore if you stay quiet because you’re too scared or worse, too proud to say you still need the help. I have had to ask people for help that I swore I would never ask, because I didn’t want them to know how bad things were and I didn’t want them to think less of me because I needed the help in the first place.

It may sound silly, but I think that’s the hardest thing about all of this for me. I have to swallow my pride and break down and ask for help and it kills me. It makes me feel inferior and less than. It makes me feel worthless and like I’m useless to everyone around me, especially my daughter. Sure, the logical part of me knows that nothing could be further from the truth, but this is a very emotional time for me right now and logic doesn’t always win out. Needless to say, last week was extremely tough for me and I smiled and tried to act like I was okay because I guess I just wanted to pretend that I actually was okay.

But I am not okay. I miss having a home. I miss having my own space. I miss being able to cook my own meals. I miss my desk, even the crappy bed I had that was falling apart. I miss having a place to call home. I miss the peace that I had within my home. I miss my library of books that I probably will never get back because I am getting ready to lose everything that I was able to salvage and put in storage because I can’t keep the storage unit up AND still keep the room my daughter and I have been staying in. I miss the routine that both my daughter and I had, in our own respective spaces in the home that I had for nearly 23 years. I miss the security that having a place of your own provides. I just miss what was.

I’m trying to stay hopeful that I can not only get it all back somehow but gain back more than what I lost but it’s getting harder to hold onto that hope. This is the place that I come to get everything I’m feeling out because holding onto things is how we can make the problems worse. I hope I can get back to a place where I am okay again but today is not that day. Thank you for letting me express myself.

Until next time… #BeMindful #BePatient #BeinFaith

Link to my Ko-fi with the updated goal: https://ko-fi.com/authorjccarpenter

Link to my GoFundMe: https://gofund.me/55b817f1

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Jimmetta Carpenter

CEO/Writer/Editor

Write 2 Be Media/Write 2 Be Magazine

Is My Best Really Good Enough?

July 31, 2023 jcladyluv

I did not win Camp NaNo. Now to be honest I wasn’t as confident this time that I could complete the goal that I had set for this month-long writing challenge, but I held out hope. Right up until the last week I was still hoping that I could push myself harder to finish the task. I did the best I could, but it just wasn’t good enough. Why couldn’t I just buckle down and do what I know needed to be done?

Now one of my amazing friends would probably remind me to have grace with myself. They might even point out that given my current situation it was a win just to have tried and the logical side of me would agree with that. Right now, I’m thinking emotionally and I’m a bit upset with myself. I feel like my best simply wasn’t good enough. Although in terms of writing lately nothing feels like I’ve been doing a good enough job. It doesn’t help that the depression monster is visiting me.

I haven’t really written much of anything since, well since becoming essentially homeless and I am very angry with myself about it. I want to force myself to write but every time I sit down to do so all of the things that I’m stressed about flood my brain instead of words to fill the page. Now I know what you’re thinking. But you’ve been writing blog posts, for example this very post, and isn’t that writing. Yes and no. I consider this more me writing about what I’m feeling, updating you on what’s going on and where my head is at. The creative writing isn’t really flowing the way that I want it to. The way that it should be. That has got to change. I miss writing and I miss the continuity of a writing routine where I can say I wrote a certain number of words, or pages, or hours, in a day. I have to get back to that part of me.

Perhaps this next challenge that I am partaking in for the month of August will help with that. I’ll just say it’s writing something that I’ve never actually written before but have been longing to write. To find out what this challenge is stay tuned to my YouTube channel for the announcement tomorrow (August 1^st) because I’m really excited about it. I’m excited to get back to the creative side of writing and not just a little bit on one day and then maybe a little more a week or two later. I’m excited to write something new and I’m excited to write with some consistency and since this is challenge that I’m doing in a collaborative way I feel like that will encourage me all the more to just sit down and do it.

I hope that I can do it. I hope that I can get back to that creative part of writing that I love as much as breathing. If you have been feeling like you haven’t been doing enough in any particular area of your life, you’re not alone. Know that you are doing the best that you can, even when it doesn’t feel that way. Give yourself a bit of grace and then get right back at it and try again. You can do this and so can I. We’ve got this!

Until next time… #BeDiligent #BeMindful #BeEmpowered

Link to my GoFundMe: https://gofund.me/55b817f1

Link to my Ko-fi with the updated goal: https://ko-fi.com/authorjccarpenter

Link to my Amazon Wish List: https://www.amazon.com/hz/wishlist/ls/3FHOYNA8LFMHG?ref_=list_d_wl_lfu_nav_4

Jimmetta Carpenter

CEO/Writer/Editor

Write 2 Be Media/Write 2 Be Magazine

Never Be Afraid to Take Up Space

July 17, 2023 jcladyluv

I started thinking last night about how tired I have been feeling. Not just in the physical sense of the word but also mentally and emotionally. I mean in terms of how long I’ve been fighting to make all the things in my life, all the dreams I’ve had for my life, all of the passion I feel towards writing happen and still nothing. Now I’m not saying I haven’t accomplished anything and I certainly never had any expectations of being some overnight success but I will say that I had expected to meet some sustainable level of contentment by the time I was in my 40’s. My level of success doesn’t necessarily equate to fame and fortune (not that those two things wouldn’t also be nice), just simply being able to keep myself afloat and perhaps be able to be in a position to help others. Neither of which have happened clearly as I am currently living out of a hotel room, and even that is in jeopardy from day to day. Some days I just want to give up the fight.

On those days that I just want to throw in the towel and give up I always seem to come across something that motivates me to keep on going. Be it a verse in the bible or an inspirational talk from someone I admire, or sometimes both, something always sparks that drive to just keep hanging in there and go forward, don’t look back. I watched a short speech from actress Sheryl Lee Ralph last night (here’s the link in case you wish to be inspired as well) and she talked about all of the no’s she’s heard in her career and the power that believing in yourself holds. She pondered on what would have happened if she had stopped and given up with every no she heard or every door that closed in her face. She certainly wouldn’t have been in the position to have won her first ever Emmy in her 60’s and become the second African American woman to become an EGOT (Whoopi Goldberg being the first).

She talked about how powerful just the simple act of believing in herself truly was. She had made a promise a long time ago in her career, after hearing a very loud and absurd no from a producer, to always give herself permission to take up space in whatever room she entered, whatever creative field she wanted to dip her toe in. She would not give up on herself no matter what. The truth is if you don’t believe in you then why would anyone else. It’s not that I have never believed in myself. Quite frankly most of the time I think that I am the only person that believes in me but there are days where even that is in question, and I start to wonder do I belong in this field. Are the decks stacked against me for a reason? The doors keep closing, so maybe I just should stop knocking.

Then I start to shift and think maybe the real problem is that I haven’t given myself permission to take up the space that I need to take up. I’ve been trying to fit in whatever space someone would allow me to be in and is that what truly believing in yourself looks like? Maybe I shouldn’t be knocking on the doors, but rather knocking them down (metaphorically of course lol) instead? Maybe my problem to begin with was aiming to just be content instead of seeking the abundant life that God has told me I’m entitled to (John 10:10). Rather than setting the bar too high perhaps I haven’t been setting the bar high enough. There’s no such thing as believing in yourself too much or having too much faith. After all, faith can make broken wings fly and soar, and enable you to take up all of the space in the world that you need. I’m ready to take up some space, are you?

Until next time… #BeConfident #BeBold #BeFearless

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Jimmetta Carpenter

CEO/Writer/Editor

Write 2 Be Media/Write 2 Be Magazine

From the Ashes One Must Rise

July 10, 2023 jcladyluv

I find it a humorous kind of irony that being someone who is extremely resistant to change, I find myself in a current state of constant change. As someone who strives to create sustainable hard core routines (didn’t say I succeeded at doing this lol), I now find myself in a state of survival mode daily. While there is a sense of sameness developing, it is still not a guarantee that things will actually play out the way that I plan them to on any given day.

Someone said to me that I will be like the phoenix and rise from the ashes, to which I initially felt uncertain of their assured certainty. Then I saw the image above saying that essentially, only from the ashes of who we once were can we rise up to truly become who we were meant to be. Pretty poetic right? I thought so. I don’t know how much of a Phoenix I would be, but I like the thought of meeting the challenges I face head on and not crumbling into the pile of ash my life has seemingly become.

A phoenix symbolizes strength, transformation, and renewal and I definitely think that I have discovered my true strength going through this ordeal. I also think that it could be a good opportunity to transform, not just my mindset, but perhaps even my surroundings, as I am no longer tethered to any one set place. Now the renewal part is the aspect that I haven’t gotten to yet but I look forward to that day when I can feel renewed and settled again.

It’s true that we can’t always pick the battles that we face but we can choose how we recover from them. We will be worn and battered, possibly even bruised and broken, but if w crumble into the pile of ash, then what does any of it mean. We fight battles to become victorious and there is no victory in not getting back up, in not rising. Sure, we will struggle to stand back up again, and yeah, we will likely have scars to show for it, but what’s the alternative. So whenever you feel the urge to lay down and quit, think about the phoenix that you are, deep down on the inside, and rise! You are becoming exactly who you were meant to be.

Until next time… #BeEmpowered #BeStrong #BeVictorious

Link to my GoFundMe: https://gofund.me/37f1fbb2

Link to my Ko-fi with the updated goal: https://ko-fi.com/authorjccarpenter

Jimmetta Carpenter

CEO/Writer/Editor

Write 2 Be Media/Write 2 Be Magazine

Starting the Challenge From Behind

July 3, 2023July 3, 2023 jcladyluv

So, Camp NaNoWriMo July officially started Saturday and I am already behind. Now this may not seem like a big deal to most but anyone who knows me, knows that I am very diligent when it comes to all things NaNoWriMo, and I am the person (normally) who needs the everyday badge of participation and has to hit that daily goal no matter what.

Of course, there is grace to be given when things go wrong but I have to say, things have never been quite so out of sorts for me. I am usually very excited about Camp but for July I am just barely enthused. I have a goal mind you, I’m just not entirely confident in my abilities to actually be able to accomplish it. It isn’t because I don’t want to accomplish the goal, I just don’t have all of the tools that I need or would normally have to be able to effectively get the job done.

Now of course, anyone who knows me also knows that it won’t stop me from attempting to achieve the goal anyway. I have a novel to revise and edit and even if I don’t get the whole thing finished, I will still come out of the month-long challenge with something accomplished and given my current circumstances, I’m going to call that a win. So happy Camp NaNo everyone who is participating.

Even if you are not a writer participating in this crazy challenge, I’m sure you have things on your list for the month of July that need to get done. May you accomplish all of the things and also give yourself grace enough to know that even if you don’t check off everything on the list that you want to, you should still celebrate the things that you are able to achieve. Sometimes those little wins add up to even bigger rewards.

Until next time… #BeMindful #BeBold #Be Fearless

Link to my GoFundMe: https://gofund.me/37f1fbb2

Link to my Ko-fi with the updated goal: https://ko-fi.com/authorjccarpenter

Jimmetta Carpenter

CEO/Writer/Editor

Write 2 Be Media/Write 2 Be Magazine

The Struggle Has Never Been More Real

June 26, 2023 jcladyluv

Excuse me while I get a little real for a moment. It’s been a rough month to say the least. I would be lying if I said that I wasn’t struggling, not just financially, or physically, but mentally. As I feel the depression setting in I try to deny it’s presence but it’s pretty hard to hide what everyone else can see so clearly. Last week I said in one of my videos that I felt like I was in a tunnel and I just couldn’t see the light at the end of it right now. That was the moment I stopped denying that I was, in fact, depressed.

Logically I know that with everything I have gone through in the last month I have every right to be depressed but the irrational part of me is just like, no depression this is not the time for you to appear. I have too much to fix and to straighten out to get depressed right now. I don’t know what to do. I’ve never been in this position before and I never thought I would be. I feel like such a failure and like I’ve let anyone who has ever seen potential in me down, at the top of that list is myself and my daughter.

I wanted to post something happy and optimistic today and I know there’s still some positivity deep down inside me but right now I just need to get this out and essentially scream into the void, so to speak, how I’m really feeling. The positive me will return by my next post, I’m sure, but real life is full of ups and downs and I always promised to be my most authentic self in the spaces that I hold so this is me, telling you all, how I’m really doing right now. I am not okay.

Until next time… #BeVulnerable #BeBrave #BeMindful

Link to my GoFundMe: https://gofund.me/37f1fbb2

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Jimmetta Carpenter

CEO/Writer/Editor

Write 2 Be Media/Write 2 Be Magazine

Nowhere Else to Go From Here But Up

June 5, 2023 jcladyluv

It’s been a couple of weeks since my last blog post and to say that things in my world have changed drastically would be quite the understatement. While I don’t always feel the need to share every single facet of my life, I do pride myself on being as authentic and transparent about this writing journey, and life in general (because life itself even without such high ambitions is a journey) so since everything can’t always be sunshine and roses here goes total vulnerability. I am now homeless and currently writing this post as I am temporarily in a hotel room that I am sharing with my daughter who still lives at home with me (because she is in college but is doing her classes online from home).

On Friday, May 19^th, in the shadiest way ever, I was evicted from my home of nearly 23 years (would have been 23 in October). I say shady because while I’m not going to act like I was completely caught up in my rent, I had fallen a bit behind, however, I had an arrangement with my prior property manager (who I did not know had left the property until this eviction happened) because she knew that I had been a valued tenant for more than two decades and that I had applied for some assistance programs the state has to help those who are self-employed and had fallen behind (due to Covid) and that I am also applying for disability (which is still waiting to be processed). Well without any word to any of the residents, they replaced the old property manager with a new one who did not value my long-standing tenancy and did not honor the prior arrangement that I had and effectively gave me five minutes for me and my daughter to grab what we could and leave.

You can imagine that we weren’t able to grab much. You can also imagine that the very first things I grabbed were all writing related (like my laptop and the notebooks I was currently using). We managed to put a large amount of stuff in a storage unit but it certainly wasn’t everything and when we came back later everything that was left was gone. My desk, the vast majority of our clothes, everything. My neighbor who had been living beside me for the last 15 of those years and we always made sure to check in on each other, gave me enough to get a room for me and my daughter the first two nights and a church friend helped with the third night for that first weekend. A GoFundMe was started on Monday and while I haven’t reached my goal yet, a large amount was raised and that is how we are still able to stay in the same hotel room that we got that first night (at a discounted rate because the hotel manager took pity on me).

I won’t lie and say that this wasn’t a traumatizing event. Every time I think of something else I lost in all of that I get a little emotional and my daughter’s words to me were “did they have to be so joyful about throwing our stuff out” and that will stick with me too. I try to always stay positive and see the good in everything but it’s a little hard in this case. That said, everything does happen for a reason and even though I’m not completely sure what that reason is right now I’m sure it will reveal itself to me in time. Perhaps this needed to happen to push me to a level that makes me feel uncomfortable and out of sorts. They say sometimes the best things grow out of what you feel are the worst things that can happen to you and if that’s true then I must be due for some really good things down the line.

I have taken the last two weeks to stew and to settle into this new reality of mine, one that I hope doesn’t last for a long time, but I can’t pretend that this isn’t going to be a hard road to getting back on track. In saying that I also realize that the work doesn’t stop, and shouldn’t stop, just because life threw me a major curve ball. I still have books to put out (another poetry book is releasing on Friday June 9^th) and that I don’t still have dreams that must be accomplished one way or another. That’s the thing that each obstacle in life teaches me over and over again. I am a fighter, and I don’t quit. I will always get back up when I get knocked down and the thing about hitting rock bottom is that there is literally nowhere else to go but up! So no matter what obstacles you are facing, you’re not alone and the one thing that you can’t do is give up. Stay in the fight and keep striving for those dreams!

Until next time… #BeDiligent #BeFearless #BeCourageous

Link to my GoFundMe: https://gofund.me/37f1fbb2

Link to my Ko-fi with the updated goal: https://ko-fi.com/authorjccarpenter

Jimmetta Carpenter

CEO/Writer/Editor

Write 2 Be Media/Write 2 Be Magazine

The Fruit is the Last to Grow

May 15, 2023 jcladyluv

I wrote a post a few weeks ago about my frustration about all the unseen work that goes into what I do and how I just wish that what I’m doing would finally start to bear fruit. It is hard to put constant effort into something day in and day out and just never see anything grow from it. Certainly not the picture of growth that you had in your mind anyway. Then I was reminded the other day when someone sent me a message to not give up and to keep pushing through along with a quote about the fact that the very last thing anyone ever sees growing on a fruit tree is the actual fruit.

It made me think long and hard about all the seed planting that people do, the watering for their dreams and ideas to grow, and even then, you only get sprouts at first, then maybe some twigs or small branches, some leaves of varying nature and finally, after all of that you see the beginnings of the fruit. Not even the whole fruit by the way. Just the beginnings as they peak through and start to finally get some sunlight. It can take up to five years to see a fully formed piece of fruit grow on a tree. Think about how long of a time that must feel like for the person who did the planting of said tree.

As I think that I have mentioned many times here before, patience is not my strong suit. That said when it’s something that you’ve dreamed about having or doing for the vast majority of your life, patient is the only thing you can be. I have been writing since I was a young girl and am only just now starting to publish my work so I can’t expect for my online store with my writing products to just take off right? I mean, obviously I thought it would be doing a little better than it’s doing right now but I took my time to open my online store because I wanted it to be products I believe in and not just something thrown together for the sake of earning an income. I’m willing to wait it out to see it become what I envisioned in my mind it could be.

Seeing this quote also reminded me of something else though. I saw another saying, along those lines, and it said that the best time to plant a tree was 20 years ago and the second-best time is now! If the trees we plant (or in this case the seeds of our dreams that we sow) take at the very least five years for us to see the fruit, then what am I waiting for as it pertains to some other things that I have in mind to do. Writing and having an online store with writing products isn’t the extent of my dreams. I keep waiting, thinking that there will be a perfect time, or at least a better time, to start the other things on my list of dreams to accomplish but time is the only thing that none of us can guarantee. None of us is promised tomorrow or next week, or next month, or even next year.

I’m not trying to sound bleak just trying to put out there what I am just starting to realize. That if you have something that you are dreaming about, constantly, and you see everything it can be in your mind, then start now. Don’t wait for some magical perfect time because there is no such thing. One could argue that maybe there’s a better time, a more financially feasible time, but who knows when that could be or how long it can take. If the seeds we sow today are going to take, bear minimum, five years to materialize then why not start planting them now. They may grow slowly and while you are watering and fertilizing those seeds it may seem like the wait is taking forever but inevitably, they will grow. While you’re waiting just remember that the trees that are slow to grow often bear the best fruit!

Until next time… #BeDiligent #BeConsistent #BePatient

Jimmetta Carpenter

CEO/Writer/Editor

Write 2 Be Media/Write 2 Be Magazine

A Time to Rest and Reset

May 1, 2023 jcladyluv

Now that it is May and I have just finished up a month-long writing challenge like Camp NaNo (and a first draft of another book) I am taking the first week of the month to do sort of a rest and reset. The time that we have in this life is precious and yes of course we have to use it wisely to get things done that need to be completed. However, we also have to take the necessary time to recharge as well. We can’t run ourselves ragged and rely on the fumes of leftover energy to get us through. We have to know when to replenish our creative wells. The work doesn’t get done anyway if we have used up all of our drive and have nothing left to give.

I was listening to the message at church yesterday and it was focused on time and how much people waste it complaining about not having enough of it. I realized that I am one of those people. I am always worried that I don’t have enough time to do all of the things that I want to get done and to leave the mark on the world that I want to leave. I didn’t realize until I heard this message yesterday that by complaining about all of the time I don’t have; I was wasting the time that was right in front of me. My pastor said that when you don’t realize that the time you have is good then you end up using the time you have improperly. He said that while our time on this earth may be limited, the impact that we have doesn’t have to be. That hit home and got through my head instantly.

While I am all about working hard to fulfill all of my ambitions, I am also about taking care of yourself and listening to your body and your mind. I had to learn the hard way what pushing your body and your mind too far could do so I don’t do that anymore. I am looking forward to a week where I can just get some much-needed rest and refill my creative well with lots of reading and watching television and brainstorming (I know that sounds like work, but the ideas have to be emptied out of my head at some point lol) and doing some puzzles, playing some video games, and probably most important of all, doing some decluttering.

I am looking forward to recharging my creative battery. I think that to maximize the most out of what we can in this world we have to use our time, not to just work hard, but to also rest very well. I hope that you are taking time to rest well so that your impact on this world can be everlasting.

Until next time… #BeMindful #BeLoving #BePatient

Jimmetta Carpenter

CEO/Writer/Editor

Write 2 Be Media/Write 2 Be Magazine

This Season I Am In…

April 17, 2023 jcladyluv

I’ve been trying to learn to love the season of life I am in but I’m not going to lie, it’s not easy when you feel like you should be in a much different place than you actually are. In my head I know that everything that happens to us or around us, happens for a reason but a lot of those reasons don’t seem apparent right away. It takes patience to be able to appreciate the tough times in life just as much, if not more, than you do the good times and as anyone who knows me knows, patience is not my strong suit.

I get frustrated with the things that I can’t make sense of. I mean there are things that I make mistakes in and genuinely know and understand that this error falls on me because I messed up. However, when I know that I’m doing everything that I can, that I am busting my (pardon my French) ass to make things happen the best way that I know how with the tools that I have (because I don’t always have the tools that I need but I do the best I can) and then I still don’t see the results that I should see it’s frustrating and it’s stressful.

There is supposed to be a time for everything and a purpose for every struggle, but I keep wondering what is the purpose of me being held down and pushed back. Every time I get right to the place where I think I might be about to break through, I just keep getting knocked back down. I don’t stay down mind you, because I don’t quit, but with every hit I find that it’s taking me a little longer to pull myself back up.

I know that nothing worth having in life ever comes easy or without hard work and I don’t have a problem with that. It just starts to feel pointless when you never see anything, or much anyway, come from that hard work. Some days I can appreciate that when I finally do break through (because I will), no one will ever be able to say I didn’t work hard for it, or that I didn’t earn that breakthrough. However, I would also greatly appreciate at least one clear path to the next level.

In any event, I guess this too shall pass. Like so many of you, I’ll just have to keep on pushing that boulder up a hill until I get through this set of obstacles. I definitely will be taking some hard-earned lessons with me into the next season of my life and with any semblance of luck and an infinite amount of Faith the next season will be my greatest yet to come. Here’s to a better season if this one has been a rough one for you too.

Until next time… #BePatient #BeTenacious #BeDiligent

Jimmetta Carpenter

CEO/Writer/Editor

Write 2 Be Media/Write 2 Be Magazine

Will the Doubts Ever Go Away?

April 3, 2023 jcladyluv

I have a huge issue with doubt. As in I have a lot of it. I second guess myself all of the time and it is really starting to annoy me. I wish I wasn’t like this. That I could be one of those people who just takes big leaps of faith and trust that everything is going to work out okay. In theory, because I am a person who deeply believes in God and have a faith in Him that is just ingrained in my spirit, one would think that I would never doubt a thing. But just because the logical part of my brain knows that in the end God will always be there for me no matter whether things work out the way that I want them to or not, the other part of my brain, the not so logical side, just doubts whether everything is going to really work out okay. To put this in terms of my writing career and all the business things I’m attempting, I am busting my butt trying to make things work and it just seems the harder I try the more they don’t work.

For instance, I took a really long time to start my online store with the writing related products, with messages and sayings that I am passionate about and stand behind. I believe they are good products and people have told me that they like my online store and the set-up and everything and yet, nothing. Now I’m not saying that nothing has sold, but certainly not enough to generate a decent income and not nearly as much as I think it should be. I know that most of this is because of marketing but I don’t have money to hire a person to do the marketing and clearly, I’m not doing a good enough job on my own. It’s frustrating. I have books that are out and while those are moving, it certainly would be nice if more of them were moving (but all writers wish to be selling out tons of their books, so I don’t think I’m alone in that lol) so again, frustrating.

There are other things I have in the works, but it just makes me doubt moving forward with those things if the things I already have up and running aren’t working. Some days it just leaves me feeling like such a failure and I don’t know what to do with that feeling. It’s like I’m certainly not where I thought I would be in my life by this point but I’m definitely not as bad off as I could be. I could have stayed stuck in a pit of doubt and just never put out a book or never opened my online store and just lived in the land of what if, but I didn’t. I did the things. I put my work and dreams out there. I just would like to see the fruits of my labor.

But am I laboring enough is the question I find myself asking? Am I doing enough with what I have (which isn’t very much)? There are people who literally don’t sleep working to make their dreams a success and while I don’t require a lot of sleep, as someone who is disabled, physically I simply can’t sacrifice all of my sleep. Does that mean that I don’t want it bad enough if I’m not willing to just sacrifice everything? You see what I mean? I question and second guess everything and I just would really like to be sure about whether I’m doing all the right things or not. I would like to not feel like I’m failing at absolutely everything.

I guess I’m just sharing this today in case there is someone else out there who is feeling this way, or similar to how I’m feeling. What makes things worse sometimes is when you think that you are alone in the things that you are feeling so if you are also having some doubts about the direction you are going, you’re not alone in feeling that way. Understand that it is a period that we all go through (maybe some of us more than others lol) and we just have to keep pushing forward. Sometimes we are just going to have to keep pushing through, even with all the questions we have rumbling around in our minds. It’s the only way to make those dreams of ours come true. Even if you are not like the ones who leap first and ask questions later, if you have to be nudged a little off that tree branch, the important thing is that we still take the leap, otherwise we can never soar.

Until next time… #BeBold #BeBrave #BeFearless

Jimmetta Carpenter

CEO/Writer/Editor

Write 2 Be Media/Write 2 Be Magazine

The Unseen Work

March 20, 2023 jcladyluv

So, the message in church this Sunday was focused a lot on guarding your time carefully and on not devaluing the work that no one ever sees. Those weren’t the exact words and phrasing that my pastor used but that was the gist and it got me thinking a lot. Being a creative individual there is a lot that goes into what we do in creative fields that no one ever sees therefore sometimes it feels like that work is never valued quite enough. There’s a reason people (myself included) love watching behind the scenes stuff about our favorite shows and makings of movies and songs and things like that. It’s because we want to see the work that no one ever gets to see.

It also made me think about how sometimes people don’t get honored or recognized for all the hard work that went into creating one moment or how they can work for decades or sometimes their entire careers, all for one night that comes far past the point where they deserved the recognition. The Oscars that just recently took place is one of those things that makes you think about how long people work in their careers just to be overlooked at this one event that purports to honor the best of the best. I mean are you not the best at what you do just because this particular academy took a vote and chose to give someone else that statue instead of you? Does that make all of the unseen work that you’ve done to get to that moment where you are even among the few that can be chosen not even matter because they didn’t pick you as the best of the best that awards season?

The answer of course is no but it doesn’t always feel that you’re appreciated for all of that unseen work in that moment when your name isn’t called. For writers, who are barely ever really recognized for much, I imagine the sting of disappointment has to feel something like that sting of not hearing your name called on Oscar night when you know you should have really won over a decade ago (yes I’m talking about Angela Basssett).

As a writer and now a content creator who hasn’t “made it” yet I can’t help but often feel like all of the hard work and labor I put into doing what I do and trying to be a positive impact on other people through my gift and the content I create goes unappreciated and often times unnoticed. Logically I know that that’s not true but when you don’t see the “fruits” of your labor so to speak (in this case the money because, shocker, artists, don’t like to starve) it’s hard to know if you are really making a difference. It’s true that money was never the reason I wanted to be a writer or content creator but let’s be real, I do desire to make an income in what I am most passionate about and it’s hard to do that sometimes when it seems like no one really sees you.

The message this Sunday was the reminder that I needed for when I get frustrated about all of the work and effort that I put into my craft and my passions that it is not for nothing. I think I may have mentioned here before that I am not a very patient person, so it makes it hard when I don’t see the benefits for all the work that I do. However, I know that often times what comes easy doesn’t always provide sustainability and more often than not the obstacles that we have to face make the outcomes and rewards even more worth it in the end.

So, if you too have also found yourself wondering what it is all for you are not alone. I see you and I commiserate with you. Just know that all of the work that no one ever gets to see, it all serves a purpose. It is the foundation for the overall outcome that you are aiming for. The long wait for your efforts to be noticed, they will be bolstered by all of the time that you have spent to make things just right. What we are trying to achieve is longevity and when all is said and done because we have done all of the behind the scenes work in masterful fashion, the result will be a legacy that was well worth the wait.

Until next time… #BePatient #BeDetermined #BeRelentless

Jimmetta Carpenter

CEO/Writer/Editor

Write 2 Be Media/Write 2 Be Magazine

Movement is Never Optional

February 27, 2023 jcladyluv

If you have been following along with my blog for a considerable length of time, then you know that I am allergic to change. I say allergic jokingly but really, I am so averse to change that it nearly sends me into full blown anxiety attacks when my routines and things that I’ve grown accustomed to being a certain way have to change. Either an anxiety attack or emotional meltdowns. It’s not a good thing by any means and I know that regulating my emotions and dealing with inevitable change is something that I should have learned to be alright with by now but alas I have not gotten to that place yet. Not sure that I ever truly will.

This is the reason why change is one of the things I talk about so much on this blog (that and fear). The way that people have to work on being disciplined in any one area, or work on keeping things clean, or their issues with time management (shoot that’s another problem I have lol), is the same way that I have to consciously work on dealing with change. Simply put, my natural personality does not adjust well to change on its own, so I have to forcefully adjust myself to the things around me that need to change.

I don’t always realize when a situation needs to be altered, when there needs to be some movement forward in a certain area of my life. I often have to have things crash in around me before my brain says okay you’ve fought this point of change for a long time now, so it’s time to just adjust. This is the point where movement is no longer optional. The point where if I don’t actively and intentionally make the decision to move forward, life is going to move me regardless, but just not in the direction I wish to go. It will move me backward.

We never want to move backwards in life because then the journey is just made to take that much longer. I truly think that if I hadn’t been so resistant to changes and to moving overall, that I could possibly be much farther ahead on this road that I’m on by now. The fear of changing (there’s that fear I talked about earlier) paralyzes and causes me to stand still a lot more than I should. Now in some instances standing still can be a good thing, but usually it’s when you want to take in all that has progressed around you, not to keep from progressing period.

A lot of the time when I think about the word movement I only think about physical movement, as in exercise. Because I suffer from chronic pain and am in some level of pain almost every single day (some days are level 1 or 2 and others are level 10 pain) I have this thing where I look for days where movement can be optional. However, I never really thought about movement in general terms for life. I didn’t think about the fact that for career success, for getting goals accomplished, for just attaining your dreams, you have no choice but to move. If you don’t, your dreams and your passions in life become stagnant. They stand still.

And that stillness doesn’t just affect you. It affects every life you and your dreams were meant to touch. So, the next time you think about just standing still and giving up, or even if you’re someone who, like me, is averse to change, just remember that if you don’t move forward, it doesn’t protect you in any way. It just keeps you stuck, in the same place, doing the same things, never growing, and never changing. So don’t hold yourself back simply by being afraid to just move.

Until next time… #BeMindful #BeCourageous #BeBold

Jimmetta Carpenter

CEO/Writer/Editor

Write 2 Be Media/Write 2 Be Magazine

Accept the Unexpected

February 6, 2023 jcladyluv

“Life becomes more peaceful when you switch from expect to accept” ~ Thomas Gomes

I saw this quote this morning as I scrolled through Facebook, and it came on the heels of a rough start to my Monday. Not a seriously terrible rough start by normal standards of what a rough start would be. Just a rough start for my anxiety riddled, OCD brain who needs to have things go a certain way nearly every day for me to be able to function properly. I am a routine person, as I think I have discussed here before, and I am the type of person that if even one part of my day-to-day routine is altered, I freak out and I’m completely thrown off. I actually (crazily enough) expect things to go the way that I need them to go each and every day.

You would think that with all of the things that have thrown me off track in my life that I would be used to not having things go the way that I expect them to go but sadly I am not. I still take way too long to adjust myself to whatever changes have been tossed my way and the length of time I take to accept these changes and course corrections only makes me less productive and ultimately makes it so I accomplish less than what I had originally planned to get done.

In a normal situation, what I was thrown off by this morning (I won’t even get into what it was because honestly it would be far too silly to anyone who doesn’t understand my quirks lol) should not have affected me as much as it did. I should not have spent the better part of the first half of the day just struggling to cope with the changes and the fact that what I expected was no longer. I perhaps would have been much more at peace if I had just quickly accepted that this part of my routine was going to have to change now and that was just going to be that. It’s how I should have reacted and when I saw this quote it clicked for me. I’m wasting time I don’t have trying to control something I just can’t control anymore.

I think that’s what it was really all about and honestly what my quirks about having a consistent, unchanging routine ultimately stem from. There are so many things in life that we won’t be able to control. Things that happen to us and things that happen for us that we just have no real say in. So, it’s hard to find those few things you can control (at least for a little while anyway) and that you allow yourself to get used to being able to expect, and have them change on you, on a dime, out of nowhere.

Expectations are a funny thing. We’re not supposed to ever just expect for certain things to work out in any particular way, yet we are taught to have a schedule or routine to make sure that we are staying on track with our goals and aspirations. Aren’t routines and schedules in fact expectations? When you set up your day in a way that works best for you to be productive it is, in fact, based off of expecting for things to go accordingly. Maybe the trick is to learn to accept that unexpected things will happen, even if they throw you off balance for a little bit. Thank you, guys, for letting me vent and comment if you understand what it feels like to be thrown off and struggle to adjust to the things you don’t expect.

Until next time… #BePatient BeMindful #BeResilient

Jimmetta Carpenter

CEO/Writer/Editor

Write 2 Be Media/Write 2 Be Magazine

Can You Ever Really Succeed Without Learning to Fail?

January 30, 2023 jcladyluv

“Failure is not the opposite of success, it’s part of it.” ~Xavier Dagba

If failure is the pathway to eventual success than I must be well on my way because I have been failing spectacularly. Now obviously it is not ever my goal to fail at any of the ventures that I attempt or at publishing my books but perhaps it should be. I know that sounds crazy. Why would anyone actually want to fail? In a perfect world and in the best scenario all of the things that I put out there and am passionate about would not only do well but would exceed my expectations. However, this isn’t a perfect world and after thinking over it for quite a while I came to the realization that I might not have learned half of the things I know without having failed first.

Really think about it. If every single time we try something and we win, what do we ever learn? I mean sure we learn how to be gracious winners (hopefully anyway) and we move up to the next level of what we are striving for, but does that actually teach us anything in life. After all, if you’re not learning in this life then what are we really here for? The tough and valuable lessons are learned in moments of adversity and struggle.

If I had it my way, or the financial means, I would be what some would call a forever student. I would gladly take class after class, degree program, after degree program, to learn all of the things I desire to know. I suppose being a creative entrepreneur is not really any different because with each venture you go after, you learn new things. You learn what you did right, sure, but more importantly, you learn, through failure, what not to do the next time. This makes me look at the idea of failure a lot differently.

When you think that you’ve learned all that you can then you don’t see the value in the lessons life is trying to teach you. You can’t grow if you think that you’re done learning. I think that adversity is the ultimate teacher in life and perhaps we shouldn’t complain about the valley’s that we dip so low down into. We have to realize that without the lows that feel like you can’t get back up, you never truly appreciate the highs where you can see just how far along you’ve come. So, the next time you feel like the Universe has knocked you down and dealt you a really tough blow, think about what the Universe is trying to teach you. What lesson is there to learn in that particular failure? And then take that lesson into battle with you the next time you get up to fight for that dream another day.

Until next time… #BeBold #BeFearless #BeGrateful

Jimmetta Carpenter

CEO/Writer/Editor

Write 2 Be Media/Write 2 Be Magazine

Let’s Not Play the Comparison Game

January 23, 2023January 23, 2023 jcladyluv

“Comparison is the thief of joy” ~ Theodore Roosevelt

I try extra hard not to compare things happening in my life to the things that happen in the lives of those around me and in my circle. I would say that out of all of the days in a month, over half of them I succeed in that mission because I know that we can never see what someone else does in their everyday life to achieve whatever level of success they’re having at the moment. In reality the truth is that most of the time, if you are not succeeding at whatever dream you are chasing the problem isn’t someone else’s efforts on their journey but perhaps your lack of effort in your own, or it could just simply not be your time. Most days I remember that. Most.

There are some days, maybe a little over a handful, where you truly feel like you are doing absolutely everything that you possibly can, and you see someone on a similar path as you and everything seems to be working out in amazing fashion for them. Frankly in those few days the shit just feels unfair. You’re working your ass off, pouring everything you’ve got into this dream and vision you have, and sometimes pouring things you don’t have in the emotional tank and still…nothing. You think, how much damn adversity is one person supposed to go through before they just break. That whole notion where it’s just not your time and your time will come just seems like utter bullshit on those days and you’re just mad at anyone who is on the adjacent path and are just traveling along with no bumps or obstacles that YOU can see. Does any of this sound like feelings you’ve dealt with? No! Just me?

Well, I have had a few of those days already for the month of January and I’m telling you, sometimes it just makes me want to throw in the towel and give up on everything. But then I look at my vision board and see this quote I put on there for this very eventual moment. It says, “You didn’t come this far, to ONLY come this far”. I need the constant reminder that I’ve come so much farther than I have to go (at least I hope so because truthfully, I can’t see the entire road ahead of me) and that if I quit now, it will have all been for nothing. Honestly if I didn’t believe in my dream and my vision so emphatically, I probably would have given up on it a very long time ago, but I believe in this and I know this is what I was put here to do.

This is what I need to remind myself of when I start comparing my journey to the road that other people are on because the only thing that accomplishes is it makes me resentful of that person (and that’s not who I am) and it plants seeds of doubt in my own mind about my journey. I have different abilities and limits than the next person and I can’t map out my journey according to someone else’s level of effort and ability because, once again, their journey and mine won’t be the same.

So, when you have those bad days where everyone’s road starts to look so much easier to you than your own, just remember that while it’s natural to have those feelings, you have to put into perspective that the grass is not always greener on the other side of the fence. As the quote says at the top of the post, comparison is the biggest thief of joy and I for one want more joy in my life, I don’t want to be the one stealing joy away from myself. Don’t you allow yourself to be the thief of your own joy. Just make sure to keep watering the grass on your own side of the fence.

Until next time… #BePatient #BeBold #BeMindful

Jimmetta Carpenter

CEO/Writer/Editor

Write 2 Be Media/Write 2 Be Magazine

Be The Example

January 16, 2023 jcladyluv

I wanted to say something in the spirit of Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. today and I was looking over my posts from previous years and it’s sad that things still seem to be in the same state in terms of the world. It always astonishes me when I hear powerful people, politicians in particular, use his quotes and it is evident that they have no idea the message that he was trying to convey. Either the true meaning goes over their head completely or they make a conscious decision to go in the opposite direction of the words he says.

The picture above is one quote I had actually never heard before as one of his, but I can’t think of one that fits the time we are in better. Our leaders in this country are so busy struggling for power and trying to do anything to hold on to that power that they seem to have forgotten that they are only there, in office, to be of service. They are supposed to be there to serve the people of this country.

Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. was a man of service, not just in the fact that he served God as a preacher, but in his service of people and trying to seek justice for all of humanity. He wanted everyone, everywhere, no matter what color you were, no matter what culture you were from, what social status you held, what profession you practiced, to be treated equally. I never understood why it was such a hard concept for some to grasp, but I did understand that for some reason, it was. For some reason I would always be treated differently in some way because I was born with darker skin and because I am from what most would consider a poor status. I am technically considered below the poverty line; I pretty much always have been. But does that mean that I matter any less?

The people in power always proclaim to be for the people but there are certain members of public service who most certainly do not care about the people in this country that they are supposed to be serving, at least not past the campaign stage of things. I think the quote above is something that they all need to keep somewhere in their offices and anywhere they go really because then maybe at some point they will remember that public servants are supposed to serve the public, not their ego, or their wallets, or their professional resume. It would do well for people to remember, on this day in particular, that serving the public is one of the greatest things you can do in life, but only if you are truly serving the people, and not just yourself.

Until next time… #BeMindful #BeCourageous #BeHopeful

Jimmetta Carpenter

CEO/Writer/Editor

Write 2 Be Media/Write 2 Be Magazine

When Does Later Become Now?

January 9, 2023 jcladyluv

I don’t know about you, but I have spent large parts of my life planning for later. I’m a planner by nature so most things I do have to have some kind of plan or else I can’t function. In other words, I am not a fly by the seat of your pants kind of person. I don’t do well with spontaneity (and believe me I have tried). Now you might say, well planning is a good thing. You need a solid plan to build businesses, careers, and to really see your dreams through, don’t you?

The thing about planning so much (or at least as much as I do, which would probably be considered over-planning) is that you’re making plans for what comes later without thinking about what can be done now. I heard someone say the other day that people who always wait and plan to do things later, are people who never get things done. Now I’m sure this wasn’t meant literally because as I said earlier, everything needs a plan of some kind but there is a such thing as planning so much that you become stagnant and unmovable. A point in which you’ve made all of the plans, you’ve done all of the research, you’ve got all of your ducks in a row and then you find yourself so used to being in the planning stage that you start to wonder, well what now. What do I do with all of this planning now?

You start to overthink whether you’ve made all of the right plans. Did you research all of the right things and were your sources of research correct. You begin to wonder if you should now plan all of the ways that things can go wrong and subsequently what do you do when they don’t go as you originally planned. This can become a never-ending cycle of planning and preparation which turns into you never actually getting the thing you’ve been planning all this time for done.

So, with that in mind I’m going to make conscious efforts this year to do the things that I have been wanting to get done for a while right in this span of time that I have now. I don’t want to keep waiting for things to be perfect like I had been doing because that’s never going to happen. There were so many things that I didn’t do last year all because I was waiting for some magical “right” time to happen. I was waiting for everything to fall into place after doing all of the planning and research for the perfect moment. I was waiting for the right circumstances to be in play. But all of that waiting doesn’t bring you success.

You know what I’ve learned by studying really successful people and combing over the facets of their lives and how they built their dreams up into reality? They never waited until later. I mean sure they planned and researched but they didn’t allow themselves to become consumed with the idea of “perfect timing” and what that would look like. They planned and then they leaped and said let whatever happens happen. Did some of them make mistakes along the way? Of course they did but you can’t make mistakes if you don’t take the jump to begin with.

On my vision board there’s a saying that says, “It’s time to trust my instincts, close my eyes, and leap” and that’s what I want to do this year. I’ve spent years planning things out and researching things to the point of exhaustion. This year (as afraid of heights as I am lol) it’s time for me to just close my eyes and take that leap of faith. Faith, not only in myself, but in what God has placed inside of my heart to do and the mark I am meant to leave behind in this world. So, if you’ve been waiting for some magical right time to just go for whatever it is you want, that time is NOW! Just Jump!

Until next time… #BeFearless #BeBold #BeBrave

Jimmetta Carpenter

CEO/Writer/Editor

Write 2 Be Media/Write 2 Be Magazine

Breaking Through the Darkness to the Light on the Other Side

January 2, 2023 jcladyluv

Happy New Year everyone! Welcome to the Year of possibilities! I am more than ready to leave 2022 in the rear-view mirror because, well, to say that 2022 did not go as planned for me would be a massive understatement. Apologies for having been gone for a little while (or at least it feels that way) but I have been having some struggles with life in general thus my mental health has been greatly affected and it has been a lot.

Going into this new year I want to feel motivated to make it better and to get to a point where I’m not just surviving but rather, thriving. I want that for all of us. It would shock no one who knows me that I have some lofty goals for myself this year, although I do think that they are a little paired down from last year’s goals (that did not come to fruition) but I am more about giving myself grace this year for what I don’t manage to achieve. As the realization set in during the month of December that I was going through a state a depression (and honestly had been for months but I was in denial) it was evident that my focus in the New Year truly needed to be on self-care and taking better care of myself.

When I say taking care of myself, I don’t just mean physically but also mentally. In fact, one of my personal goals is to find a therapist and start the counseling I’ve most likely needed for years now. I’ve seen the good that therapy can do for others and while I was never against therapy for myself, I still had not managed to take that step but that changes this year.

Now while my focus is going to be taking better care of myself, I definitely have plans to publish this year. I have two poetry books already finished and that I now have covers for so those will definitely be released this year. I also will be prepping my second novel for publication in the Fall. I have always been one to push through whatever adversity comes my way (admittedly with a little meltdown along the way) but one of the quotes I have on my digital vision board (pictured above) says that stars can’t shine without darkness so if I’m going to shine that just means I have to break through those dark moments and shine brighter than even I could have ever imagined. That brings me to my word of the year, which is Breakthrough. I am long overdue for a breakthrough and that is what I’m working towards this year. What’s your word for the New Year and what’s motivating you going forward? I hope you are having an amazing start to your year and that you will stick around and come along on my journey.

Until next time… #BeMotivated #BeCourageous #BeBright

Jimmetta Carpenter

CEO/Writer/Editor

Write 2 Be Media/Write 2 Be Magazine

It All Depends On How High You Bounce Back

November 21, 2022 jcladyluv

“If you never know failure, you will never know success” ~ Sugar Ray Leonard

I haven’t written here in a few weeks, roughly about a month and I just want you to know that it wasn’t because I suddenly ran out of things to say. Aside from the fact that NaNoWriMo is this month and I tend to be more singularly focused on writing a brand-new novel in November, the last few weeks have just been inherently hard. I have been feeling like the Universe has just singled me out and said, ‘nope you can’t get any wins right now because you just don’t deserve to win’.

Now of course I know, logically, that that’s a little ridiculous because everyone deserves a win in life. It’s just not feeling like I’m going to get one anytime soon. It’s kind of like getting a couple of steps ahead for once and then getting knocked fifteen steps backward. It’s hard to feel optimism in that scenario. Yet, I am reminded of the fact that each time I think I’m not going to survive through the week, somehow by the time the end of the week gets here I’m still standing, and I have survived to fight another day, another week, another month, another year.

We’re getting close to the end of this year and that’s about the time where I usually reflect on the things I didn’t get accomplished and the plans that didn’t come to fruition so that I can figure out where I went wrong in my planning and plan effectively for the following year. However, it feels like my best laid plans don’t seem to ever materialize the way that I think they will, if they materialize at all. I thought for a moment that maybe I just shouldn’t plan anything, maybe I should just go with the flow but trust me, if you know anything about me by now, you know that my little planner heart would literally break without having a plan in place. So, what then? If the plans seem to not be working but I can’t just not plan, what do I do with that?

I don’t think I’m the type of person that could just not plan for success. Maybe the key is just to manage my expectations which could then manage my disappointment. Perhaps it’s just as simple as knowing that failure is the very life blood of success because how can you truly succeed without failing a few times (or in my case a few dozen times) because failure is the very proof that you are trying, that you are going for your dreams, and that you are not giving up on them, ever. As much as I may sometimes want to throw in the towel, it’s just not in my nature to give up.

I know that I want to be purposeful in everything I do in this life. I want to inspire others with my gift for words and motivate those who may also be struggling with big dreams and crushing defeats. You can’t do any of that if you’re just going to throw your hands up and say to hell with it, I give up. I’ve never been a quitter, and that’s not to say there haven’t been moments when I tried to quit (both at life and my dreams). It’s also not to say there won’t be moments in the future where I’ll have really hard days and want to quit again but I’m made of stronger stuff than that, and so are you! We’ve got this and no matter how many times life tries to knock us down we will keep getting right back up because that’s what success is truly about. It’s about continuing to get back up no matter what and no matter how long it takes to achieve the dream!

Until next time… #BeFearless #BeTenacious #BeDiligent

Jimmetta Carpenter

CEO/Writer/Editor

Write 2 Be Media/Write 2 Be Magazine

To Pretend or Not to Pretend…That is the Question?

October 24, 2022October 24, 2022 jcladyluv

I did a lot of pretending when I was younger. In elementary school I had to pretend the home I went back to everyday wasn’t broken and abusive. In high school I had to pretend I was not crumbling on the inside and like I wasn’t constantly thinking of ways to just end it all. In college and early adulthood, like most young adults, I had to pretend that I knew what the hell I was doing. With people I came in contact with back then I would pretend that I was outgoing and like I thrived on being around lots of people when in reality people drained me and any creative energy I had, and I really just wanted to be left alone. Not alone in some lonely, woe is me type of way either, but rather in a way that actually refilled my creative well.

I mean that’s what life is mostly isn’t it. Pretending! Going along to get along. Trying to fit in with people you probably don’t actually like just so that they don’t classify you as difficult, weird and awkward or just think that something is wrong with you altogether. You pretend to understand things you really don’t because you don’t want to appear like you aren’t knowledgeable and capable. It gets to be a little tiring to pretend all the time. To always have to be “on” and faking that you feel something you don’t or faking that you’re happy if you’re not.

When you get to a certain point in life you just want to be surrounded by people and live a life where you can just simply be. Where you can express how you feel about something or someone without having to hide your emotions and feelings. Where you don’t have to apologize for being a person who wears their heart on their sleeve and whose emotions show up all over your face. You want to not have to explain yourself to people who you thought you didn’t have to explain anything to because it was thought to believe that you were accepted just the way you were.

The simple truth is, at least the truth that I’m coming to realize, is true acceptance doesn’t really exist. No matter what situation you find yourself in, no matter what circle of people you surround yourself with, there is always going to have to be some manner of pretending. Sometimes it hurts to realize that but it’s best to live in reality than to have blinders on and think something is true that isn’t. Even those that are closest to you, that are your closest friends, aren’t going to always accept everything there is about you. We are all deeply flawed, and sometimes vastly broken individuals and that means we have things about us that others just can’t come to terms with and that they would rather adjust or change about you than just simply accept without question.

Let’s be honest, you probably have some things that you would change about the people in your life as well. I suppose the real question is who in your life are you willing to make adjustments for and who are you willing to pretend around? Can you really ever go through life without having to pretend something? Is there ever going to come a time in life where you can remove the mask and just be yourself without having to rationalize who you are to those you love and call friends and found family? I thought it was possible but now I’m not so sure. I guess the jury is still out on that one and only time will truly tell.

Until next time… #BeBold #BeFearless #BeYou

Jimmetta Carpenter

CEO/Writer/Editor

Write 2 Be Media/Write 2 Be Magazine

On the Other Side of Time

October 17, 2022 jcladyluv

So often we find ourselves in a place in our lives where we just know that we should be somewhere that we just aren’t yet. We have the trajectory planned out and feel that if we are truly doing everything right then of course our plans would fall into place. It would be really nice if the plans we make could be seen through without any bumps along the road. Unfortunately, things don’t always work out the way that we planned.

However, maybe it’s not unfortunate because there are times when beautiful things happen along the way to the plans that we originally made. Sometimes we find things that make us grow as a person and people that help us become better than who we were before we headed out on our journey. There are moments that we sometimes miss looking for what was supposed to be.

Life is about growing and becoming better versions of ourselves with every passing day. Staying true to a plan that has outgrown us isn’t necessarily beneficial to you or the people whose lives you are meant to touch and impact. We can’t always fit in to a place in which we no longer belong and trying to continue to do so just hinders our growth. Growth isn’t always going to be as beautiful of a transition as is one from a caterpillar to a butterfly but if we keep in mind that the uneasy and uncomfortable parts of change make for beautiful results in the end then it makes all of it worthwhile.

The beautiful things that we are expecting out of life, they aren’t just going to magically appear. They aren’t always going to have some alluring transition into this masterpiece of a result without some twists, turns, and uneasiness. There is a process we must grow through in order to get the life that we truly want, the life we know we deserve. What we truly want for our lives comes on the other side of time.

Until next time… #BeDiligent #BeMotivated #BePatient

Jimmetta Carpenter

CEO/Writer/Editor

Write 2 Be Media/Write 2 Be Magazine

Can There Be Grace In Failure?

October 10, 2022 jcladyluv

Last week I felt like I was failing on multiple levels. I couldn’t seem to get anything to go right or work out right and I wasn’t saying all the right things to the people around me. It was just not my best week. However, when I go back and look at my footage for my writing vlog on my YouTube channel that I filmed all last week I see that while yes, everything didn’t go as I had planned it or wanted it to go, I also didn’t completely fail at everything. And what I did fail in, I learned some lessons from what I didn’t do right. I guess that’s the thing about the way we perceive things and how it may be seen to the outside world.

The thing that I can’t seem to get a handle on is how to have grace with myself. I try and sometimes I think I have a handle on a good self-care routine that allows me to have that grace. But most of the time it’s my own expectations of myself and my abilities that make it hard for me to cut myself any slack. I don’t typically worry about the expectations others have of me and that is because my own bar for myself is so unattainably high that I can’t seem to get over or around it. I want big things out of life. I want to leave a big legacy for my daughter and in this world. I can’t do that playing things small and yet I constantly feel like that is what I’m doing.

It seems that I’m always having to adjust my goals because I simply can’t seem to reach them, at least not in their entirety. It’s like I come close but fall short on so many levels. When I saw the above quote, it made me think about the fact that even in my losses perhaps there are still some wins in the lessons that I am able to take away and apply towards the next attempt that I make. It reminds me that as long as I at least give it a solid try and truly put in the effort to achieve the goals I set out to accomplish then I haven’t really failed because there are so many people who just don’t try at all.

I suppose the point in all of this is to say if you too struggle to allow yourself grace, if you also beat yourself up for the goals that you don’t get accomplished, that you are not alone in that mental tug of war. Try to remember, as I will also, that it’s not about how many times you get pushed back from the goal line or get knocked down. It’s about getting back up and pushing through towards that goal line. It’s about not giving up and letting the doubts in your mind win. it’s about taking the lessons that you learn from the initial blow and applying them to your next attempt. Make sure that you are taking some mental breaks from the pressure that you put on yourself and remember that taking care of yourself is also a win. It’s a win for your mental health.

If you are looking for some suggestions of some things you can do to show yourself some grace and maybe take better care of yourself, I just did a video last week, mostly for writers, but it applies to anyone really, about ways to better take care of your mental health in high stress periods of time. I hope that you check it out and I hope that you make just as much of an effort to show yourself some grace.

Until next time… #BePatient #BeHopeful #BeMindful

Jimmetta Carpenter

CEO/Writer/Editor

Write 2 Be Media/Write 2 Be Magazine

We Have Reached the Writing Holiday Portion of the Year

October 3, 2022 jcladyluv

It’s a new month and we have now entered a Writer’s favorite season, or at least this writer’s favorite season. It is Prep-Tober which is the month that we take to get ready and organized for National Novel Writing Month (NaNoWriMo for short) in which writers challenge themselves to essentially fast draft a novel in only a month. To people who aren’t writers it sounds absolutely crazy to take on this challenge but to a writer this is our holiday season, and we get totally hyped up for it.

Now the secret that I’m not sure a lot of writers will really tell you is that it’s not really about whether we can finish the novel, in actuality it is about the community of writers that we have built up and the support that we give to one another throughout the entire month. That’s not to say that we don’t support one another every other month in the year but during Prep-Tober and NaNoWriMo that community outreach and support is multiplied times a hundred because it’s the one time a year where all of our goals are pretty much synced up in the same way.

I love this time of year because typically it is when I get to map out a brand-new project (I have done a couple of NaNo’s as a rebel before though) and I get to flesh out one of the many shiny new ideas that plague me throughout the year. I’m excited to get back to writing in my mystery series as I will be writing the fourth book in that series. Mystery is where my heart really is in terms of writing, well mystery and contemporary fiction, but mostly mystery. I do want to also write a historical fiction romance book but I’m not mentally or emotionally ready to write that one just yet, maybe next year.

If you too are writing a novel this November, I hope that you will come join the AuthorTube Community over on YouTube and perhaps subscribe to my channel (link is below) and some other wonderful channels over there to get your dose of community and, if you need it, help with your stories and overall motivation for the task at hand. Writing is not an easy feat, and it is inherently a solitary act, but it doesn’t always have to be. I hope that you all have a wonderful first week of October and if you are also a writer and are joining in on the excitement of our season, that your Prep-Tober kicks off in spectacular fashion.

Until next time… #BeBold #BeMotivated #BeInspired

Jimmetta Carpenter

CEO/Writer/Editor

Write 2 Be Media/Write 2 Be Magazine

Never Give Up On You

September 19, 2022 jcladyluv

In case you missed the talk of the Emmy’s last week, actress Sheryl Lee Ralph won her first Emmy at 65 years old for supporting actress in a comedy series. Only the second black woman, with the first black woman having won 35 years ago. Now the fact that she finally won an award that she is overqualified for and should have won a long time ago isn’t the takeaway of the night for me. Her acceptance speech, in which she sang a song about being an endangered species and knowing where her voice belongs as an artist, and then went on to tell the audience that that moment was what believing looked like and that if you ever have a dream, you should never give up on yourself. I think I replayed that speech about a dozen times that night and probably another two dozen since then. It was something that I didn’t even realize I needed to hear.

The last couple of weeks I have been feeling quite defeated and a bit kicked around by the universe. It’s been making me question my talent and my abilities, and even someone with as much faith as I have can get bogged down by self-doubt. I’ve been wondering with all the hard work that I put into writing and being a creative individual why success seems to continually elude me. Now my definition of success is not the typical fame or fortune, which I’d be lying if I said I didn’t want just a little bit. Rather what success looks like to me is accomplishing what I set out to do in this world, fulfilling the purpose I truly believe I’m here for, and taking care of people who need to be cared for. Success to me would be having an impact on others in some meaningful way.

I have never had an easy road on this journey we call life. Things have definitely been rough at some points, damn near unbearable at others, with a few bright spots along the way. Sometimes I forget that just because things don’t happen as quickly as I want them to, or think they should, doesn’t mean that they are forever out of reach. I also tend to forget that what I do does matter to some and acknowledgment can come from even the most surprising places.

I don’t think that I have ever quit at anything in my life. Not anything that meant anything to me anyway. I may have had moments where I took a break, had to recharge my drive for just a bit, get my bearings together after a big letdown, but never have I quit. I’m just not made that way. When I heard that acceptance speech from Sheryl Lee Ralph, it just reinvigorated me and reminded me of what I already knew deep down inside. That I can never, ever give up on me. So, if you need someone to tell you that it’s okay to rest and recharge but don’t stay down. If you need someone to remind you of what you’re working towards and to keep pushing through. Then let me tell you, get up and look in the mirror and say to yourself “Never give up on you.”

Until next time… #BeDiligent #BeRelentless #BeFearless

Jimmetta Carpenter

CEO/Writer/Editor

Write 2 Be Media/Write 2 Be Magazine

Never Lose the Power to Imagine the Endless Possibilities

September 5, 2022 jcladyluv

I recently took LeVar Burton’s Master Class on the Power of Storytelling and there was something he said that stuck with me. That we have to keep our imagination in order to visualize and manifest what it is we want out of life. He highlighted the fact that as children we are always so inquisitive and asking what if this were possible and what if that were possible. Somewhere along the way, as we grow older, as we are told to grow up and to be practical and realistic, we lose that part of us that questions everything and that believes that everything we want can be made a reality simply because we believe it to be possible.

He made a powerful statement that nothing can ever happen in our lives unless we first believe it can, unless we can first imagine that it can be a reality. I have never thought of it quite that way. We need our imaginations, and we need to carry them with us throughout our journey in life because you are going to constantly have people telling you what it is that you can’t do. There are going to people at every turn judging you and putting you down and trying to, in their words, keep you grounded in reality, but the reality that they want for you is not the reality that matters. If their reality limits your imagination and the span of what it is, you would be able to do then let them keep their version of reality while you hold onto yours.

We are the Masters of our own fate. I mean yes, overall, I believe that God is the one who navigates our journey, but you have to believe in the gifts that God has instilled you with to change this world. You have to know your value and that the possibilities for you are endless as long as you believe they are. We have to keep that part of us that can imagine what others deem impossible. It’s how we are going to see this journey we are on through and become all that we are destined to be in this life. More than that, it is the best way that we can go beyond what we can even imagine. In order to reach our true potential never lose sight of all of the things that you imagine possible for your reality. We can soar as high as our imaginations will carry us!

Until next time… #BeInquisitive #BeFearless #BeInspired

Jimmetta Carpenter

CEO/Writer/Editor

Write 2 Be Media/Write 2 Be Magazine

Never Underestimate Your Inner Strength

August 22, 2022 jcladyluv

Someone reminded me the other day when I was feeling frustrated and defeated and just plain weak that there is no way that someone who was weak could have survived everything I’ve been through and still be here. From an abusive childhood to the multiple attempts of suicide that didn’t take, the many bouts of depression, quite a few car accidents that I probably shouldn’t have been able to walk away from, extreme anxiety, and of course the normal knocks that life just hands you on a regular basis. They also reminded me that even though I am not always aware of the difference that I have made in other people’s lives, that I have in fact made a difference.

I tend to think big even in terms of the change I want to affect in this world so when I say I want to change other people’s lives in some meaningful way I immediately think in terms of money and being able to one day give to various charities and organizations that make changes throughout the world. To help people in their times of need the way that people in the past have helped me in mine. I didn’t mean to dismiss the small changes that can be made over time. I neglected to think about the small impressions that one can leave on someone’s life that could change their lives for the long term.

I’m not good at always thinking the best of myself or complementing myself, or apparently receiving complements in regard to myself. I don’t always see in myself what other people see in me and it’s definitely one of those things I need to work on but also a coping mechanism developed over many years that’s a little hard to get rid of. I am quick to dismiss my abilities, sometimes forgetting what I’ve already achieved in my life. I have for far too long underestimated myself and my value in this life.

We should never sell ourselves short, both in terms of the strength that we have to face difficult things that come our way as well as in regard to the change that you make in other people’s lives. Sometimes we never even see the impact that we have on those around us until someone else points it out. We all matter to someone, most likely to a lot of someone’s, and even if you aren’t the owner of some major corporation that donates millions to charities on a continual basis, it doesn’t mean that you can’t change the life of the person you come in contact with simply by going to the store. Just because you aren’t sure how you’ve managed to survive the obstacles that have been tossed your way doesn’t change the fact that you did in fact survive them. On those days when you are feeling weak and discouraged just remember the strength you have inside you and the impact your life has on others.

Until next time… #BeVigilant #BePersistent #BeFearless

Jimmetta Carpenter

CEO/Writer/Editor

Write 2 Be Media/Write 2 Be Magazine

https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCPU35EkFSbuxgekCp4LfI5g

Troubles Don’t Last Always

August 15, 2022 jcladyluv

I try not to get too overly hopeful anymore about how a year is going to go for me. I swear every time I move a couple of steps forward in my goals, life comes along and says ‘nope, not so fast, need to knock you back a few steps more, you’re not quite ready yet’ and then I get discouraged. Not discouraged enough to ever give up on my dreams and goals because come on, if I haven’t given up on them at this point why would I suddenly give up now. It just gets extremely frustrating when I feel like I just might be getting somewhere, that for once I might be getting to a place where I can just not have to worry so much. That place where I can be comfortable (not in the complacent kind of way) and just not have to stress over every single little thing for fear that the walls around me will come tumbling down. It just sometimes feels like I can get close enough to touch the dream but never quite close enough to actually have it.

Keep in mind when I say the dream, I don’t mean being rich and famous or overly wealthy (not that I would deny myself that opportunity if it should so happen), just to make a living from my creative abilities and not have to worry if I’m going to have a roof over my head from one month to another. I mean to be able to have my daughter tell me she needs something and to not have to weigh helping her with what she wants or needs against providing food and shelter for the both of us, or even just myself. I just want to be able to survive and thrive a little with my art and then if there was a bonus that I would add to that, I would say to be able to reach out and help other people who are also struggling without hesitation.

I know that being a creative is not an easy thing and I’ve never thought that it was supposed to be, but I just never anticipated constantly getting knocked back every time I manage to get somewhere, and I mean every single time. Having said all of that, and being the spiritual person that I am, I am reminded from several church sermons and biblical scriptures that troubles do not lasts always. That whatever struggles I have gone through, or that I will inevitably go through, that God will always bring me through anything, and it may not be in the way that I think, but it will always be in the way He feels is best for me to be able to grow.

I am so highly resistant to change that I sometimes think that the knocks that life keeps giving me is its way of telling me that I need to stop being so afraid of change and to stop shying away from risks and opportunities that could make me grow. Could that be the lesson here? That troubles don’t last always but they do always persist until you learn the lesson that you were meant to get from the journey. Perhaps that is the piece of the puzzle that I am missing. Being brave enough to go for anything without thinking of what could go wrong.

Whatever your struggles are in your journey to get to the dreams and goals you are trying to reach don’t let the times that life will knock you down discourage you. You have to get back up and keep pushing through. There is light on that other side, even if it only looks like you can see tiny cracks of it right now. Let those tiny cracks of light be enough for the moment. Imagine how much more there is to see if you just stay vigilant and keep moving forward. I won’t lie and say that you won’t get discouraged ever again. That’s a part of life, a part of the journey. But just keep in mind that troubles don’t last always and that you can only get what you’re striving for if you keep going.

Until next time… #BeVigilant #BePersistent #BeFearless

Jimmetta Carpenter

CEO/Writer/Editor

Write 2 Be Media/Write 2 Be Magazine

https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCPU35EkFSbuxgekCp4LfI5g

Where’s the Manual for This Thing We Call Adulthood

August 8, 2022 jcladyluv

I was having a conversation with my daughter the other day who I constantly feel like I failed. Not because I don’t love her and show and tell her that every single day so that she knows she is loved (which is something my mother never did). Not because I don’t do a good job of making sure she is taken care of first and foremost. But rather because I’ve spent far too much time sheltering her in the vein of wanting her to not grow up before she should have to, letting a child, or teenager, be and act the age that they are.

The problem with that has now come to fruition in the fact that she now clings to the sheltered life that I practically killed myself (metaphorically of course) to provide and she’s terrified of going out into the world and actually being an adult (despite the fact that she’s 19). I made her feel too secure in being taken care of that she doesn’t have confidence that she will be able to take care of herself. What do I do with that? I mean I tried to explain to her that there isn’t a manual on being adult, hell I’m still winging it as I go along.

How do I dispel her fears of adulthood when her fears are valid. Being an adult is definitely not all it’s cracked up to be and I had to be one far before I actually became an adult which is why I wanted her to enjoy the years that she didn’t have to be. But I may have completely hindered her which makes me feel like a complete and total failure as a mother. It’s a tricky balance between being the mom who wants to protect your child no matter what to being the mom that has to let go and let her child spread her wings and fly. It’s even trickier when that child doesn’t want to leave the nest. I’m just writing today to express my frustration with this new phase I’m in of being a parent to an adult child (because we all know you never stop being a parent no matter how old they are) and I’m hoping that there is someone out there that understands so that I’m not alone in this conundrum.

We had a talk yesterday and I told her that there is no manual for being an adult. Everyone is just trying to do the best they can with what they’ve got but the one thing she can’t do is not go out and try. She said she was terrified of messing up and I explained to her that she will absolutely mess up. I told her that she will make plenty of mistakes and she will learn from those mistakes and then make some more. I told her that being an adult is basically trial and error and you don’t know what works for you or if you’ve gotten something right without actually trying. It didn’t seem like it helped her, and I imagine when I was just entering adulthood it might not have helped me either but that was all of the wisdom I had.

I just want her to feel confident in this world and I don’t know how to get her there. I guess it will just have to be a day-to-day thing because what other options are there. I just really want to know, where’s the manual to this adulting thing that we were forced into. Well getting this little rant out helped a little and perhaps it will even help someone else out there. I guess we’ll see!

Until next time… #BePatient #BeMindful #BeCourageous

Jimmetta Carpenter

CEO/Writer/Editor

Write 2 Be Media/Write 2 Be Magazine

https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCPU35EkFSbuxgekCp4LfI5g

A Little Self-Care Will Go a Long Way

August 1, 2022 jcladyluv

So Camp NaNo ended yesterday, and I accomplished my goal which was to complete 30,000 words in the second draft of my current novel. I wrote a little over 32,000 words so I’m happy with that, but I need a little bit of a brain break from the story and the everyday pressure to write something in that story. Don’t get me wrong I love NaNo and the whole organization and the community that spawns from the event but towards the end of each month of those NaNo events it can get a little overwhelming.

So a few of us in our little corner of the AuthorTube community on YouTube thought it would be a good idea to focus on self-care the first week after each NaNo. We even have self-care Bingo cards (it’s a thing we do, a little friendly competition and camaraderie) to make it fun and to essentially make sure that we take care of ourselves. So that is what I am doing this week. I am not doing any heavy work, nothing related to writing anyway. I will be back next week with a new blog post. Also, if you would like to challenge yourself to a self-care week or even a month, I am leaving the link to the two self-care bingo cards which can also be found on my video that will be going up later today. Take care yourselves everyone because you deserve it!

Self-Care Bingo Card #1: https://bingobaker.com/#b2cda71389264966

Self-Care Bingo Card #2: https://bingobaker.com#a19d19d195f756d9

Until next time… #BeGentle #BeMindful #BePatient

Jimmetta Carpenter

CEO/Writer/Editor

Write 2 Be Media/Write 2 Be Magazine

https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCPU35EkFSbuxgekCp4LfI5g

The Circle You Choose

July 25, 2022 jcladyluv

I think sometimes it can be overlooked how important it is to have a core set of friends who understand you and your passions. Not only that but understand and accept you as a person. They don’t ask you to be anyone you’re not while still allowing you the room to make changes at your own pace. They don’t judge the things you do that they may not understand. They respect what you’re passionate about and respect the time you need to dedicate to that passion. Most importantly they are friend enough to tell you when you’re not doing what it is you’re supposed to be doing and that you need to get yourself (s**t) together.

I joined a writing community virtually a little more than two years ago (a little bit before the Pandemic hit) and as luck or fate would have it, it turned out to be one of the best things I could’ve ever done. I met friends there who get me, they understand me, they accept me, they are my tribe. I underestimated how much I needed that. Even us introverts need a tribe and people who will support you and encourage you no matter what.

Even though I’m a person who would rather be alone more often than not, I have always had a good amount of friends (not too many and not a dismal number either) but I can’t always say that they understood me or accepted me fully without trying to change me at their rate of change. I can’t even say that they always respected what I’m passionate about (writing) or the time that I need in order to fulfill that passion. I’m sure that they thought they were being the friends that I needed them to be because I never lead them to believe otherwise. Given that they were far more social than I am I’m pretty sure I wasn’t what they needed either.

I think this is why every friendship isn’t meant to last forever and people do move on and they grow apart. But when you do find those people that get you, your tribe so to speak, you absolutely should hold onto them. And don’t just receive the love they pour into you, make sure that you are pouring love back into them as well. Writing can be such as solitary career choice, but it doesn’t always have to be. Find your tribe and when you do make sure that you love on them and hold them close.

Until next time… #BeMindful #BeReceptive #BeEmpowering

Jimmetta Carpenter

CEO/Writer/Editor

Write 2 Be Media/Write 2 Be Magazine

https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCPU35EkFSbuxgekCp4LfI5g

Are You the Tortoise or the Hare?

July 18, 2022July 19, 2022 jcladyluv

I was on a live stream yesterday with a lot of my fellow writer family and we have this thing we do during streams where we pose questions on each sprint and they can be questions that are silly and allow us to just think fun thoughts, but they can also be deep prophetic questions that make you really think long and hard about what determines your answer. Oftentimes they’re a mixture of both. So yesterday on my friend Gwynna’s stream (watch the replay if you would like) she asked the chat are you more of a tortoise or a hare and why? The answer could be literal or metaphorical.

Now I don’t think my answer will shock anyone, I said I was a tortoise through and through. The funny thing is about a decade ago I probably would have said metaphorically a hare but physically a tortoise. I mean I’ve been overweight since I was in the 5th grade so speed has never really been my thing on a physical level but there was a time where I wanted everything to happen quickly.

I had goals and visions and I wanted to achieve them right then and there. I didn’t want to allow for any growth or learning curves, I just wanted things to magically happen for me. I would see people around me with not nearly as much drive or ambition have opportunities just present themselves to them and they took those opportunities for granted. It’s funny what living a bit of life and raising a child and hitting many (many) brick walls can actually teach you.

I’ve always read the story of the tortoise and the hare and would choose to be the hare in that scenario if I could because he was quick and confident. Now I see that story a little differently. He was quick and confident, but he was also cocky and didn’t think things through or prepare well enough which meant he didn’t have a good game plan for how to win, he just relied on his speed and his cockiness. There is a reason why slow and steady wins out. I said that I was a tortoise through and through because I have grown more methodical and analytical. I have learned to think things through (one could argue I might think them through a bit too much) and I don’t go into things on a whim. Sometimes this can be a flaw because there’s no spontaneity in being methodical and some think there is no fun in being cautious.

Now there is nothing wrong with being a hare (metaphorically or literally) and being that spontaneous and throw caution to the wind kind of person. There are times where that, throwing caution to the wind attitude, is necessary. I wish that I was that person but personally that doesn’t work for me. I think slow and steady really is the way to go. It may not get me to my destination as fast as I would like to get there and there will most definitely be stumbles and people to trip me up along the way but if I don’t give up, if I take my time, and if I remain confident but not too cocky, I will get there and what’s more important, I will be able to sustain myself once I do.

Whether you are more of a hare or more of a tortoise in life, I think the truly important thing is to know who you are and what method works for you to get to your end goal and to make it through this life. Even if you are a hare there is still some preparation that has to be involved or else, you’ll end up like the hare in the story who didn’t properly prepare for the race that he had to run and who also underestimated the person he was running the race alongside. However, you get to the finish line make sure you are focused on the lane that you are in and that you’ve given the race your all. Winning is nice but being the first to cross the finish line isn’t what matters most. What matters most is that you eventually cross that finish line.

Until next time… #BeVigilant #BeConfident #BeAmbitious

Jimmetta Carpenter

CEO/Writer/Editor

Write 2 Be Media/Write 2 Be Magazine